Page 99 of Dare You to Run

My jaw drops. I have no words and barely thoughts at this point.

“It was something I knew she needed. Every once in a while, I’ll find her out here just talking about me and the kids, or simply sitting in silence. I never want her to forget him. He took care of her until we could find our way back to one another, and I’m grateful for that.”

“Is Slo…did they ever have any…” Vaughan shakes his head, understanding the question I can’t seem to get out.

“No. They never had any children. Cami said Robbie always made excuses as to why they should wait. She finally came to the conclusion that it was because he wouldn’t be here to help raise them. I think it was because he was worried about passing on whatever problems he had to a child. I guess we’ll just never know.”

I look at the large tree and stare at the roots that protrude from the grass.

“But that’s not what I wanted to bring you out here to talk about. I want to…” he pauses and closes his eyes. “I want to say I’m sorry. After a long talk with Camille –and by talk I mean she scolded me and I listened– she made me see what a first class asshole I was being.”

I fold my hands together, handing them between my spread legs, a stare down at my shoes.

“I never meant for any of this to happen. I hope you know that,” I explain.

“I believe that. Really.”

“It’s just…have you ever wanted something so much even though you know it would bring heartache?”

He looks at me with a slight grin. “Yeah. I do. As far as what you’re talking about, no one can relate better than Bishop and Anais. They fought their feelings knowing what trouble would follow with their relationship, but love doesn’t always listen to rationality.”

“I’ve never felt anything so strong as I do for Dagen. No one has ever brought such peace into my life and I feel like, if I don’t hold onto it with both hands, I’ll never feel it again. We may not have planned this but now that it’s here, I won’t let anything steal it away.”

“NowthatI understand. More than most.”

We both sit in shared silence, realizing we’re more alike than either of us ever thought.

“All I ask is that you’re a good man to my little girl and a good dad to my grandchild. Holy fuck, I’m going to be a grandfather.” He shakes his head as if the final piece just clicked into place.

I breathe out a small laugh, relating to the same shock.

“I promise to always take care of them. I may need a little help with the dad part since I never had one. Hopefully you can guide me. After all, you raised an amazing daughter. That big heart came from somewhere.”

His eyes glisten and he blinks it away as he places his hand on my shoulder and pats it.

“Deal.” He suddenly seems lighter and maybe more like the man Dagen has told me about. “We better get back before Dagen thinks I buried you here.”

Boy, if he only knew how true I thought that was.

FORTY

A loud whooshand thump fill the small room that five people are crammed into.

When Mom helped me make my first doctor’s appointment, I thought it was a me and Hendrix appointment. Not a me, Hendrix, Mom and Dad appointment. They might as well have invited all the aunts and uncles.

Then again, I don’t even know if they all know.Oh god, I’m going to have to tell them.

“Is that…is that the heartbeat?” Hendrix asks, looking a little pale at the moment.

“It sure is,” Dr. Molina tells us. “Nice and strong.”

Hendrix grabs my hand and stares down at me. His eyes are wide and he mouths the words “holy shit” to me, and I couldn’t agree more.

I hear sniffling coming from the corner of the room and look up to see Mom and Dad holding each other, both with tears in their eyes. The anger Dad held, and the fear Mom was festering seems to fade away.

“Well, based on the measurements, you appear to be approximately five weeks along. That puts your due date in December. Maybe even a Christmas baby.”

“My birthday is Christmas Eve,” Hendrix says.