Page 19

CHAPTER NINETEEN

I hurried down the hallway, my heart pounding with a mix of fear and desperation.

Dad had just dropped the bomb that Vince was sending us away—me, Mira, and Iset. To some secret Raptor headquarters, God knows where. Like we were fragile china dolls that needed to be tucked away for safekeeping.

In all honesty, I’d felt like a fragile china doll ever since I’d helplessly stared at Fee convulsing on the floor. I’d felt more fragile than I’d ever felt before—well, more fragile than I’d felt since Italy. And the threat of leaving, of being apart from Vince, made it all worse.

I couldn’t handle being apart from him. And this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. We were stronger together. He and I were a team now. How could he make this decision without even talking to me?

I reached his office door, my hand on the knob, ready to go in and beg him not to send me away. I opened the door without knocking, then stopped when I heard his voice, low and frustrated, drifting through the crack .

“She’s nothing but a distraction right now.”

I froze, my blood turning to ice in my veins. The words hit me like a physical blow, knocking the air from my lungs.

She. Me. I was nothing but a distraction?

Rage bubbled up inside me, hot and fierce. How dare he? After everything we’d been through, after last night, our wedding…after telling me he loved me, after giving me the impression he was truly considering us a team.

I wanted to kick the door open, to scream at him, to burst in and give him a piece of my mind. But I stood there, trembling, my hand still on the doorknob.

Was that all I was to him? A distraction? Someone he just pulled closer when he wanted or pushed away at his inconvenience?

I thought about Fee, lying in a hospital bed because she’d taken a sip of juice meant for me. Guilt and fear warred with my anger. For a split second, the old feelings of guilt took over.

Everyone close to me got hurt because of me.

But no! I refused to think that way anymore. Nothing I did caused that situation. Nothing I did could’ve prevented it.

I wouldn’t guilt myself anymore, and I wouldn’t let Vince push me away—not like this, not when we’d barely begun our life together.

Taking a deep breath, I squared my shoulders, pushed open the door, and came toe-to-toe with Dante, who, after taking one look at me, side-stepped me and vanished faster than a rabbit on the run .

Vince’s eyes immediately locked onto mine. The surprise on his face quickly morphed into a guarded expression as he took in my furious stance.

“A distraction? Is that all I am to you?” I said, my voice trembling with anger.

Vince’s jaw clenched. “Jemma, you shouldn’t be here. I’m in the middle of?—”

“I don’t care what you’re in the middle of,” I cut him off. “You don’t get to make decisions about my life without even talking to me first. I’m your wife, not some pawn you can move around at will.”

He stared at me, then ended the call, and crossed the room until he towered over me with his imposing frame. “This isn’t up for discussion. It’s for your own safety.”

“Is it?” I snarled. “Then why did you just tell whoever was on the other end of that call that I was just a distraction? Which is it now? For my safety, or for your ability to focus?”

He glared at me.

“You’re pushing me away because you can’t handle the fact that you actually care about someone. It’s easier for you to pretend I’m just a distraction, isn’t it?”

Vince’s eyes flashed dangerously. “You have no idea what you’re talking about. This isn’t about me or my feelings. This is about keeping you alive.”

“And what about what I want?” I challenged, stepping closer to him. “Did it ever occur to you that I might want to stay and help? That we might be stronger as a team?”

“Jemma,” he growled, his patience clearly wearing thin. “This isn’t a game. People are trying to kill us. I can’t focus on finding out who’s behind this if I’m constantly worried about your safety.”

“So you’d rather just ship me off and forget about me?” I felt tears pricking at my eyes but refused to let them fall. “I thought we were in this together, Vince. You told me we were in this together.”

His expression softened for a moment, but then the mask slipped back into place. “This isn’t about us. It’s about what needs to be done.”

“No.” I shook my head vehemently. “It’s about you being a coward. You’re scared of actually letting someone in, of actually caring about someone. So you’re pushing me away before I can get too close.”

I glared up at Vince, my chest heaving with anger and hurt. But as I met his eyes, I saw something there that made me pause. A storm of emotions swirled in those dark depths—frustration, fear, and something else I couldn’t quite name.

Suddenly, his hands were on my arms, pulling me closer. His grip was firm but not painful, and his voice dropped to a low, intense rumble. “Choose your words very carefully, Punk. I’m barely holding on here, and I can’t guarantee what will happen if you push me any further.”

The raw emotion in his voice caught me off guard. I searched his face, really looked at him for the first time since I’d burst into the room. The lines of tension around his eyes, the tight set of his jaw—he looked as miserable as I was feeling.

My anger deflated like a balloon with a giant hole, replaced by a wave of understanding. “You’re scared,” I whispered, the realization hitting me like a ton of bricks. “You’re not just trying to get rid of me. You’re terrified of losing me. ”

Vince’s grip on my arms tightened slightly, and I watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed hard. “Of course, I am,” he admitted, his voice barely audible. “I can’t lose you. Not now, not ever. And if keeping you safe means sending you away, then that’s what I’ll do.”

Tears welled up in my eyes again, but this time, I didn’t try to hold them back. “But don’t you see? I’m terrified of losing you, too. The thought of being sent away, of not knowing if you’re safe…it’s killing me.”

His forehead dropped to rest against mine, and I felt the fight drain out of him. “I don’t know how to do this,” he confessed, his breath warm on my face. “I don’t know how to be what you need and still keep you safe.”

I sighed. “This was all I needed. You showing me how you really feel. Seeing you struggle as much as I do. We’ll get through this, I promise.”

He stared at me as if he’d never seen me, as if he was as dumbfounded as I was about our reversed roles. “I don’t want you to ever pretend with me. Show me how you feel, and I promise I will do the same.”

He smiled even though the smile didn’t reach his eyes. “You already show me how you feel. Right from the start, you were the only woman who showed me every nuance of her disdain for me.”

I smiled. “So you getting angry and pushing me against a wall, or a doorframe, or just towering over me, is that your move to hide whatever you’re truly feeling?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Sometimes, I’m really furious. But I’ve mostly been furious about you challenging me.”

I cupped his cheek. “Well, you’ve got a whole life to adjust to the feeling. ”

He nodded, then kissed me. And just like that, at least, this tiny area in our lives was okay again.