Page 20 of Daddy’s Muse (Bloody Desires #12)

Colby

I woke to the smell of coffee.

For a second, I didn’t know where I was—the bed was way too cozy, the blankets heavier, and there was the faint hum of a heater instead of the usual gurgle of the radiator in my dorm. I snuggled deeper into my warm nest, wriggling away the sleep and squinting my eyes open.

A familiar raccoon face stared back at me, and I yawned as I wished him good morning.

Then my memory hit in a rush: the crooked wings of death, running, and running, my chest squeezing so tight I couldn’t breathe… and Pappa’s arms, solid and warm, lifting me out of it.

That’s right… Pappa had come to save me and take me home.

The space beside me was empty now, but the sheets were still warm where he’d been. My throat tightened.

I didn’t want to be alone.

Pushing back the thick comforter, I padded out of the bedroom, the dark wood floor cool under my bare feet. The cabin was quiet except for the occasional pop from the fireplace, until the faint sizzle of something frying led me down the hall to the kitchen.

Bodin stood at the stove, broad, muscled shoulders relaxed but purposeful as he flipped something in a pan.

Sunlight from the tall windows poured over him, catching in his hair.

He wore dark joggers and a white muscle shirt, which showed more of his skin than I’d ever seen before.

His back bore a collection of scars and tattoos that I assumed were from his culture.

His hair was tied into a low bun, long rogue hairs framing his face.

I still didn’t quite understand how someone so gorgeous and manly was into someone so weak and awkward like me.

He glanced over his shoulder as I stepped in, and his mouth softened into that look I was starting to realize he reserved just for me.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” he said, voice warm and melodic. “I was just about to come wake you up. Come here.”

I went without thinking, gravitating toward the heat of him. He caught my waist and pulled me in before I could lose my nerve, tucking me against his side.

“Are you hungry?”

“A little,” I admitted, fingers twisting in the hem of my pajama shirt. “Um… I was thinking—I need to get back to my dorm. For work and class. Do you think you could drive me? Or it’s okay if not, I can always call for a—”

He plated the eggs, setting the dishes on the counter before turning to face me fully, a hand sliding up my back to grip the back of my neck. “No.”

I blinked at him. “But—”

“I saw what scared you when I went up to your room to get your things,” he said, firm but not unkind. “That wasn’t a harmless prank. Whoever did that wants to hurt you, Colby. And you think going back into that environment right now is a good idea?”

“I… I just don’t want to fall behind,” I murmured. “And I need my hours at the diner. I don’t… I depend on that money…”

“Your professors will understand,” he replied, like it was already decided. “Work can wait. I can cover anything you’d need money for. What you need right now is to rest and relax—here.”

Part of me wanted to argue, to say it wasn’t practical and that I couldn’t just put my life on pause. But the other part, the bigger part, just wanted my Pappa.

Pappa slid a plate toward me and gestured to a stool at the counter. “Eat. Then we’ll find you something warm to wear. No one’s expecting you anywhere today except me.”

For some reason… that made my chest loosen a little.

I slid onto the stool, still feeling the faint tremor in my hands from last night as I picked up my fork. Pappa leaned on the counter across from me, not eating yet, just watching. Not in a way that made me nervous—more like he was making sure I actually took each bite.

That was a very Daddy thing to do , I thought.

The first mouthful of eggs was warm and yummy, and I settled further onto the stool.

“How are you feeling today?” he asked, voice low as he turned to open the fridge and pull out a bottle of apple juice. He then reached into a cabinet, pulling down the most adorable cup.

I forgot about his inquiry for a second. “Whoa, it has bears, Pappa!” I exclaimed, putting down my fork.

Pappa laughed as he filled the cup. “I love how easily you’ve been slipping into littlespace with me,” he said, a proud smile on his face. Once the cup was full, he pushed it over to me on the counter. “Be careful since it’s a big boy cup, baby.”

I nodded eagerly, picking the cup up with both hands and sipping my juice.

“Do you know what type of bear that is?”

Placing the cup back down carefully, I bubbled, “Polar bear!”

Pappa smiled at me indulgently. “Very good. Did you know we also call them ice bears?”

I shook my head. “No, but I love that.” Raising my fork, I took another bite of eggs.

“Now, can you tell your Pappa how you’re feeling?”

My good mood sobered a bit, my lips tilting downward. “Do we have to talk about that?”

“Yes,” he said simply. “I need to know how best to care for you.”

“Oh…” I sighed. “Better than last night. But not… not great. It feels better when I don’t think about it. Like,” I blushed, “… like when you took care of me.”

He nodded. “You’re not supposed to know how to handle all that on your own. That’s why I’m here. That’s why you need to be here with me.”

The words made something small in my chest ache—like he was giving me permission to just… give up.

Pappa reached over and brushed his thumb over the back of my hand, his touch warm and gentle. “You’ve been trying to carry too much on your own, Colby. It’s too much for someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” I repeated softly.

He smiled faintly. “Sweet. Soft. Trusting. You shouldn’t have to know what it feels like to check under your bed in the dark. You shouldn’t be walking home from work after sunset, or wondering if someone’s watching you.”

I swallowed, my throat suddenly tight. “But I can’t just… stop . I have responsibilities.”

“You can,” he said. “You’re already here. You’re safe here. Let me deal with everything else, lille prinsen.”

It should have sounded overbearing, but in that moment—with my nerves still raw and my body still bone-deep exhausted—it felt like a relief.

Pappa’s gaze softened, but his tone stayed steady.

“You’ve been getting by, Colby. And I’m very proud of you for that.

But that’s not the same as living. If I leave you to do it all yourself, you’ll burn out.

Or worse—” His jaw tensed for a second. “—something will happen that I can’t fix, and I won’t let that happen. ”

I stared at my plate. “What if I’m too much for you, Pappa?” I asked quietly.

“You’re not,” he said gently, rounding the counter to wrap his arms around me. “Do you want to know a secret?”

“A secret?”

“Mhm,” he hummed, rubbing his chin on the top of my head. “I love taking care of you. In fact, I need it.”

“Really?” I glanced up at him. “You mean it?”

“I promise, little one. I have never needed someone, anything , as much as I need you. You give me so much, just by being your true self.”

My eyelids fluttered shut as I relaxed back into his strength. “Pappa…”

“Can you let Pappa take care of you? How I want? How I need? Stay here with me, kanin. Not just today. Please.”

“O-okay… Okay,” I agreed, earning a pleased rumble from his chest. “I can stay for a couple of days, but I should email my professors and call out of work. I don’t want them thinking I just vanished.”

Bodin’s mouth curved in a slow, approving smile. “That’s reasonable. I’ll set up my laptop in the den for you. You can send your emails while I make us coffee.”

I nodded, relieved. “Okay.”

He leaned in, brushing his hand over my cheek.

“See? That wasn’t so hard. You don’t have to fight me on everything, lille prinsen.

I’m not trying to take anything from you.

” His voice softened, dipping into something warm that made my tummy squirm.

“I just want to give you somewhere you don’t have to look over your shoulder.

I’ll handle all of your needs. Give you anything you want. ”

My cheeks flushed as I thought of a few needs that he could help with.

After breakfast, I followed him to the den, where a massive stone hearth and overstuffed armchairs made the space feel like the perfect place to curl up and take a nap.

Pappa set his laptop and my phone on the coffee table, ruffling my hair. “Here you go. I’ll be in the kitchen if you need anything.”

I opened the computer, navigating to my student email while I thought of what to say. Did I tell them I was sick? I didn’t want to lie to anybody… Maybe I was taking a vacation? A very last-minute, irresponsible vacation that I couldn’t possibly afford?

I sat with my fingers hovering over the keys for more time than I realized. When I glanced over my shoulder, Bodin was in the doorway, leaning casually against the frame with a mug of coffee in his hand, eyes on me.

“You know,” he said, “if you want, I can write to them for you. You don’t even have to think about it. Just focus on resting.”

It sounded tempting—too tempting—but I forced a smile and said, “I think I can handle an email.”

His smile didn’t falter, but something in his gaze tightened just a fraction. I wasn’t sure why.

I turned back to the laptop, typing slower than usual, my brain still foggy from the night before.

“Hi Professor, I won’t be in class today. I’m not feeling well.”

I stared at it for a moment before hitting send. No explanation and no details. I felt guilty.

Pulling up Mae’s contact on my phone, I typed out an excuse.

Colby:

Hi Mae, I’m so sorry, but I won’t be able to come in for a few days.

Dealing with some things.

“That’s perfect,” Bodin said from right behind me. I jumped; I hadn’t heard him walk up. “Short and simple. They don’t need to know more than that.”

I glanced over my shoulder. “Maybe I should tell them what happened?”

He stepped closer, his hand resting on my upper back. “Colby. Do you really want everyone poking around in your business right now? You need space to breathe.”