Page 24 of Cruel Russian Monster (Safin Bratva #2)

After hearing Vera moan into the phone, my focus was shot to hell.

An hour later, I gave up trying to concentrate and called her. I needed to hear her voice again, maybe even coax another one of those sexy little sounds from her.

I chuckled as I tapped her name and brought the phone to my ear. It was crazy how I went from hating her so damn much to not being able to imagine my life without her.

She’d become the reason I woke up with something to look forward to, the reason I wanted to go home instead of drowning in work. She made me feel human…not the monster I had to be to keep the faction in check.

She was the light to my dark, the calm in my storms, the joy in all my gray.

She hadn’t been feeling well the past few days and tried to hide it, like I wouldn’t notice. But she’d been sleeping more than usual, which was a dead giveaway. I’d make sure she saw a doctor tomorrow. But tonight, if she was up for it, I wanted to take her out for a nice dinner.

Her phone rang until it went straight to voicemail. I frowned and tried again, but had the same result. I tried a few more times. Still nothing.

Leaning back in my chair, I sighed. Maybe she was just sleeping. If something was wrong, Tomas would’ve called me. And if she was still asleep when I got home? I already knew exactly how I’d wake her up.

I chuckled, forcing the image of Vera squirming under my mouth out of my head. I needed to finish these training reports. The faster I got through them, the sooner I’d be home with her.

***

Two and a half hours later, I pulled up to the house and went straight for the bedroom, anxious to feel my lips on Vera.

But she wasn’t there.

I checked the bathroom. Empty.

Living room. Kitchen. Balcony. Still no sign of her.

There had to be a reason she wasn't in the house.

Tomas.

She probably had him take her somewhere. I called him.

“Tomas, is Mrs. Safin with you?”

“No, sir. She isn't with you?”

“Tomas, what do you mean? She's not with me.”

“Sir, she left about three hours ago. She said that she was heading to the office. She told me not to tell you anything because she wanted it to be a surprise.”

I ran a hand through my hair. “Thanks, Tomas.”

“Sir, I'm sorry I didn't say anything.”

“It's not your fault. She wanted to surprise me. I'll call around. Katya or one of the others probably called with an emergency.”

At least that was what I hoped.

“If you need me, I'm here,” Tomas said.

“Thanks.”

I cut the call and called Katya.

“Hey, brother-in-law, what's up?”

“Is Vera with you?” I asked.

“No.” Then, more panicked, “Is something wrong?”

“Honestly, I don't know. She left home to meet me at my office, but never arrived.”

“Shit,” Katya said. “Call the guys, I'll call the girls. I'll send you a message to let you know if they heard anything.”

And she hung up.

I called Marten, Pyotr, and Avit, but none of them had seen her. Then I called Lev.

“Personal or business?” Lev asked, all business-like.

“Personal.”

“What do you need?” Lev asked, his tone softer.

“Have you seen or spoken to Vera today? She left the house to head to the office, but never made it.”

“I didn't see her, but why would she come see me?” Lev's voice held genuine curiosity and not malice.

“She wanted to apologize for what happened between you the last time, but she hasn't been well the past few days. The others haven't heard from her. I was hoping you did.”

“I haven't. Did you call Katya?” He paused briefly. “Stupid question, you would've called her first, what did she say?”

“She hadn't seen her, but she's calling the others.”

Just then, a notification came in from Katya. Negative. The others haven't seen her. What are we going to do?

“Katya just messaged.” I felt my heart speed up. Fear wasn't something I’d felt since I found out that my parents had died. “The other ladies haven't heard from her. She wants to know what we are going to do.”

“And there's no way I'm going to stop Katya from being a part of this search. Is there anywhere you'd like us to look? Have you tried her phone or tracking the car she took?”

I squeezed my eyes shut. Some underboss I was. After talking to Tomas, those were the first two things I should've done.

“I feel like I'm losing it. I haven't done either.”

“Okay, tell me the places that she might have gone, and we'll check there. You stay there in case she comes back.”

I rattled off all the places that Vera might be, then Lev hung up.

I called Vera's number, but it went straight to voicemail.

Shit!

I checked my phone to see if any car other than Tomas’s had left the compound, but it hadn’t. Vera probably didn't want me to know that she was on her way to me, so she found a way to disable or block the tracker.

Fuck!

The doorbell rang and I went to answer it. It was Katya, and she had Alexi in her arms. She pulled me into a hug as best as she could.

I didn't realize how much I needed that to stop me from spiraling.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, taking Alexi from her arms.

“Well, Mr. Brave Macho Bratva Underboss, I knew you'd be worried, so Lev dropped me off.”

“Worried is an understatement,” I said as I sank into one of the sofas in the lounge.

“Did she answer her phone? Were you able to track her car?”

“Her phone is going straight to voicemail. I'm assuming she didn't want me to know she was heading to the office to surprise me, so she disabled the tracker.”

Katya's brows slammed together. “Vera grew up in Bratva; she knows that danger is always lurking. She'd never take the tracker off.” Katya's voice grew softer. “Not if it meant she might be snatched away and you'd be able to find her faster because of it.”

I hated the sadness in Katya's voice. I squeezed her hand. But she was right. Vera would never do that, but if she didn't, then who?

Before my thoughts could spiral again, Katya's voice tugged me back to the present.

“Have you called Yegor or Zahkar?”

“Not yet. I'd prefer to wait until I hear back from Lev and the others before calling them, just in case the tracker is faulty or her phone died. I wouldn't want to worry them unnecessarily.”

“But I've already called Kira. I'm sure she'll let them know,” Katya stated.

“If they call, I'll take it from there, but until then I'll wait on word from the others.”

Alex stretched his hands for Katya, and she smiled as I handed him over. Once he was settled in her arms, she looked at me strangely.

“Jaroslav, can I ask you something? It's personal.”

“About Vera?”

She nodded.

“You can ask, but I'll answer depending on the question.”

She nodded with understanding. “Fair enough.” Then she looked me square in the eyes. “Do you love Vera?”

“Yes.”

I was stunned by how quickly I said it, but I didn't lie.

I had never admitted it out loud, though.

I had never stopped loving her. I had buried that love under the hurt and betrayal I had carried over the years, but reconnecting with Vera made it rise to the surface, and hearing why she did what she did washed the final layer away.

“Have you told her?” Katya asked, lifting a brow.

“Not yet,” I muttered.

“And why the hell not?” She said it so loudly that Alexi, who had fallen asleep in her arms, jumped and whimpered.

“I'm sorry,” she cooed.

Once he was sleeping soundly in her arms again, she looked at me.

“Why haven't you told her?” she asked quietly.

I dragged my hand down my face. “It's complicated.”

“Well, uncomplicate it.”

“It's not that easy.”

“Men,” Katya huffed out and shook her head. “If you married her to stop the war between the factions, how is she going to know that your feelings towards her have changed since then?”

“By my actions.”

Katya rolled her eyes. “Have you thought for one moment that you're confusing her? That she has no idea how you really feel about her?”

I narrowed my eyes. Katya didn't just bring this up out of the blue. She'd been talking to Vera.

“Vera told you that she's confused by my actions?”

“I'm neither denying nor confirming that. What I will say is, talk to your wife. If the two of you really want this marriage to work, you have to be on the same page. I know what it feels like to be confused when you love a man and he's hot one moment and cold the other. A woman needs to hear those three words, or she’ll never believe it.”

Katya was right. I needed to talk to Vera.

I had decided that I wasn't going to let her go, but what if she thought that us being casual might mean that I'd get tired of her and go outside for my pleasure?

Many Bratva husbands didn't hide their mistresses, but that wasn't the type of man I was. I wanted Vera and only her.

“So, did Vera tell you that she loves me?”

Katya chuckled. “I'm neither denying nor confirming that.”

“I just want to make sure that when I talk to my wife, I’ll have an idea of which way the tables will turn.”

“Oh, you'll have a very favorable outcome.”

I grinned. “Have I told you that you're my favorite sister-in-law?”

Katya laughed softly. “I'll only hold you to that when the others have been married.”

Just then, my phone buzzed, and the panic that had subsided rose again.

“She's not at any of the places you gave us,” Lev said on the other end. “Has she returned home?”

“Shit. She's not here.”

“Call Yegor and Zahkar. We'll keep checking. Keep me posted.”

“Will do.”

When I got off the phone, I called Yegor at the number he had called me from the last time. I prayed that it was his personal number, or at least a direct line.

I began to pace, Katya's eyes following.

“Jaroslav. What's up?” Yegor answered.

“Have you seen Vera? Has she contacted you?”

“Today? She hasn't contacted me.”

My jaw clenched.

“Have you seen her?”

“Why are you asking if I've seen her? Shouldn't you know where your wife is?”

I pulled the phone from my ear and looked at it. I bit down the frustration.

“Yegor, have you seen Vera today? She left home to meet me at the office and never arrived. No one has heard from her. Her phone is going straight to voicemail.”

“Why would her phone go to voicemail?” Yegor asked. “You told me that you'd take care of her. And you lost her?”

Why wasn’t he answering my question about whether he'd seen Vera? Something was going on.

“Yegor, please. I need to know that she's okay and she's not lying in a ditch somewhere hurt.”

Then an image flashed across my mind of Vera in a ditch, hurt and not moving, and my chest tightened.

“She's safe.”

“So you know where she is?”

Katya stood up, hope in her eyes.

“Yes,” Yegor confirmed.

“Fuck, Yegor, tell me where she is!” I was barely able to hold on to the emotion that was building. From fear to panic to hope, and now rage.

“Artyom found out about the marriage. He threatened to blow up your headquarters with you inside if she didn't go with him. But Jaroslav,” Yegor's voice hardened. “Let Zahkar and me handle it. Let us figure out what to do.”

“Like fuck I will! Vera is my wife. I can't just sit back and do nothing,” I yelled.

Alexi began to cry, and Katya left the lounge with him.

“Jaroslav, if you confront Artyom about it, I don’t trust that he won't hurt you,” Yegor sighed. “Vera cares about you, and I know you care about her. But her being here for now is the safest place for her to be. Look, I've got to go, I'll keep in touch.”

“Fuck!” I roared and flung my phone across the room. It shattered against the wall.

Katya ran into the lounge holding a crying Alexi. Her face was lined with worry.

“What is it? Where is she? What did Yegor say?”

“Artyom found out about the marriage. He has Vera.”

“Is she hurt? Is she safe?” Katya's voice was laced with panic.

I stood still and closed my eyes. I needed the calm the fuck down. The last thing I wanted to do was make her worry more than she already was.

“Yes. Yegor says she's safe. She isn't hurt.”

Relief washed over Katya's face. “Thank God. So what are you going to do?”

“I'm going to get my wife back.”