Page 8 of Coyote Underground (Monsters of New York #9)
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D iego
My heart breaks a little when Ana Sofia asks me if I hate her.
I never intended to make her believe that.
I’ve been pushing her away since we met because I’m terrified she’ll reject me.
It’s ridiculous and immature. Honestly, I’m better than that.
Except I’m not. Part of me would rather have her think I can’t stand her than know just how badly I want her.
How will she ever accept us as mates if she believes I don’t want her?
She stands as I step closer. We’re alone in this room, and I know Zac and Zo did it on purpose. “Why would you ask that?” I take another step, and she backs up a little. I can’t tell if she’s nervous or if she believes that I would actually hurt her.
Because I have no idea what’s going on in her head, I stop and stare at her. “The way you look at me. I can’t tell if it’s hatred or desire in your eyes. And that kiss didn’t help. I just want to know where I stand.”
“I see. I’d like to counter your question with one of my own, if I may,” I say, stepping closer and backing her up against the wall. I’m close enough now to feel her heart racing against her chest.
“Oh, okay,” she sighs.
“Which would you prefer? For me to hate you, or for me to want you?” I ask, leaning closer and running my nose up her neck from her shoulder to her ear. The shiver that races up her spine doesn’t answer my question.
“I, uh, I don’t know,” she whispers.
I can’t hold back the laugh that escapes me, causing Ana Sofia to jump away from me. She can’t escape, though, because I have her boxed in against the wall. “Am I making you nervous, princess?” I ask, knowing I’m only making it worse for us both.
She nods, unable to speak. This isn’t what I wanted at all. I’m not sure how to fix it, either, without actually admitting my feelings and fears. “Would you like me to answer your question honestly?” I ask, stepping back so she can get away from me if she wants.
It shocks me when she doesn’t move. “Yes. I would like you to answer honestly. Do you hate me?” she asks again. Pain squeezes my heart once more, and I wince at the question.
I shake my head. “No, princess. I don’t hate you, I never have. I’m so much older than you, that I tried to push you away so you couldn’t reject me.” I close my eyes and turn away from her, the honest words taking their toll on me.
Small arms encircle my waist from behind. It’s not the reaction I expected, and I’m not sure what to do now. I stand there, frozen, until she shifts. Ana Sofia ducks under my arm, moving in front of me without letting go.
“Why would I reject you?” she asks, locking eyes with me. I see her unshed tears, and for a moment, hope they’re for me. Ana Sofia rests her head on my chest, and my arms wrap around her as if they have a mind of their own.
Before I can respond, she pulls back, rising on her toes and presses her lips to mine again. This kiss is sweet and chaste, nothing like the one earlier. But it melts my heart and gives me hope. “I don’t think I could ever reject you, unless you kept acting like you hated me,” she whispers.
“Never again, princess. I promise. And if I do, you just call me out on it. Okay?” I cup her face in my hands, staring into her pale green eyes. She nods, and I kiss her again.
****
A na Sofia
Diego’s honesty touches me, and I understand his fear. Rejection is the worst. But fear shouldn’t make someone hateful. His words make me want to show him I do want him, and his fears were unfounded.
While we’re kissing, I hear the door open behind us. “What the fuck?” Lorenzo asks, clearly upset that Diego is kissing me again. I’m sure he’d be happier if I were kissing him instead. Hmm, that’s an interesting idea. I really should kiss them all, shouldn’t I?
I mean, they did say they’d give me anything I want. What if I want them all? Can I even ask for that? I don’t know.
I pull away from Diego, breaking the kiss. He doesn’t try to hold me there, letting me go easily. But he doesn’t look embarrassed or ashamed of it, either. Good. “You said anything I want, right?” I ask, looking from Diego, to Lorenzo, to Isaac as he enters the room.
“We did, kitten, and we stand by that statement. Whatever you want, you can have. You just have to tell us what it is,” Isaac says.
I walk over to him, expecting someone to stop me. When no one makes a move, I wrap my arms around his neck and lean forward, stopping when my lips are almost touching his. “What if I show you instead?”
He hums his approval, and I press my lips to his, expecting him to take control the moment our lips touch.
Instead, he melts against me, opening his mouth to let my tongue explore.
A feeling of power and confidence erupts inside of me as I deepen the kiss.
Isaac’s hands wrap around my waist, and I hum against his mouth.
His cheeks are pink when I break the kiss.
Biting my bottom lip, I turn to Lorenzo, who’s been watching everything with disbelief on his face. “Did you think I’d leave you out, sexy?” I ask, walking over to him.
The grin that spreads across his face is priceless, and I can tell he’s going to be a handful.
He grabs me, pressing his lips to mine before I can agree or object.
I relax into it, letting him have control over my mouth.
My body molds to his, and I wrap my arms around his waist. He’s taller than the other two, so reaching his neck is harder without him leaning down for me.
These men bring out my Omega nature more than any others have in the past. They have me imagining a family, a pack, a home. I’m breathless when I break away from Lorenzo, wishing this was all happening under better circumstances.
“Okay, I think we need some ground rules,” I say, trying to sound surer than I am. As much as I want to surrender to these feelings, I have to find my sister. She’s in danger and my chances of saving her become slimmer every moment we waste.
“We’re listening,” Isaac says, motioning for the other guys to sit on the couch. I pace the floor in front of them.
I try to gather my thoughts, but it’s nearly impossible with the three of them staring at me. Closing my eyes for a minute, I decide that honesty is the only choice here.
“I’m not having sex with any of you tonight,” I announce, then hold my breath while I wait for them to object.
“I’m good with that,” Lorenzo agrees.
“Definitely,” Isaac adds.
“We told you, princess, whatever you want,” Diego says.
I release the breath I’d been holding, a disbelieving laugh escaping my lips. “Really? No one objects or has a problem with that?”
“Kitten, I think you missed the part where we said this is whatever you want. It doesn’t matter what we want.
Right now, you’re in control. We’re here to protect you and make you feel safe.
That’s it. Sex doesn’t factor into that at this moment, and that’s okay.
It’ll happen when you’re ready, or it won’t happen at all,” Isaac explains with a grin.
It’s clear they’ve discussed this without me. I’m not sure if I’m annoyed or touched. Either way, it’s nice that they aren’t upset. “So, you’re telling me the three of you are just here to snuggle? No one is going to make a move?” I can’t help asking for clarification.
“If that’s what you want, then yes. As for making a move, that’s on you. We will respect your wishes, unless and until you tell us otherwise,” Diego insists.
Fuck, this is hot. Why am I even more turned on by knowing they’re willing to wait? I’ll have to consider that later, when I’m alone. For now, I’m going to enjoy feeling safer than I have in years, even if I’m worried about my sister.
“And first thing tomorrow, we’ll start looking for Val again?” I ask, needing to hear the words from them.
“We haven’t stopped looking. Right now, there are a couple of teams who work for us following leads we got at The Gin Room. I’m not making any promises, but we’re hoping they can narrow things down for us so it doesn’t take as long to find her,” Diego explains.
“Oh, I thought you guys had just stopped because you didn’t want to leave me here alone,” I say, ducking my head.
“I can see why you’d think that, but no, we aren’t pausing the investigation just because you need our attention. The men following leads are qualified and trustworthy. They’ll call if they find anything. I think getting some sleep would be in our best interest,” he responds.
I stifle a yawn, realizing I’m more tired than I thought.
“I think you’re right.” Before I can say anything else, Lorenzo scoops me up and carries me to the king-sized bed in the other room.
I half expect him to toss me onto the bed, but he doesn’t.
Instead, he holds me against his chest as Isaac and Diego pull the covers back.
I’m not sure what I expect, but I’m prepared to fight off advances if they happen. Lorenzo sets me on the bed, and the other two pull the covers up around me.
Yawning again, I lick my lips as I watch them strip down to boxers and boxer briefs.
For the first time, I’m concerned I won’t be able to stop myself from instigating something with these men right now.
Ana Sofia, you need to focus on your sister.
Val is the only thing that’s important right now.
No matter how badly you’ve wanted to be claimed by this pack, now is not the time.
I reprimand myself for the thoughts running through my head.
The three of them climb in the bed with me after stripping off shirts and pants.
With their warmth next to me, my racing heart calms a little, and my anxiety settles.
I can tell Lorenzo is the least likely to stick with our agreement, because he pulls me into his arms without waiting for me to ask.
Instead of getting upset, I settle against him, resting my head on his chest and letting him hold me.
I’m very aware of the fact that Isaac is between Diego and me. I can’t help wondering if that’s Diego’s way of forcing himself to keep his hands off of me. It’s a smart move, because these men are hard to resist.