Page 3 of Cowboy Bear’s Hope (Motley Crewd Shifters #3)

T he memory replayed itself in my head and I wished like hell it wouldn’t, but there it was. Plain as day.

I laid Rosie down on a makeshift bed of a couple of hay bales and a thick, cozy blanket. Having a wedding in a barn had its advantages, I supposed, and I grinned as I smiled at my baby girl.

Ever since I knew she existed, she’d stolen my heart. I’d do anything for her. Anything at all.

But just lately I’d been feeling restless. A longing for something else in my life. And of course, that made me feel guilty.

“She looks like an angel,” a deep voice said beside me, and my whole body shivered in response.

“Thanks. I mean, I like to think so,” I said, agreeing with Dante.

His big body always felt so warm when he stood next to me, and I turned slightly so I could see his handsome face.

He always had just a smattering of scruff lining his cheeks and defining that strong jaw of his and my fingers itched to touch it.

I’d been denying it, but I had it bad for the man.

“You know, Rosie is crazy about you,” I whispered.

“Yeah? I like her too,” he said with a smile that seemed to fade when he looked down at me.

He was easily a foot taller than I was, even in heels. But that didn’t stop me from sliding my hands up his chest and wrapping them around the back of his neck.

“What are you doing, Avery?” he murmured, his voice impossibly deep.

“Just wanted to test a theory,” I whispered, tugging on him just to see what he would do.

Dante bent his head, his warm lips brushed against mine, and I swear, I felt him everywhere. All through me. Especially when we kissed in the dark at the back of the barn.

Music and chatter from the wedding party faded into the background, and all I wanted was to keep on kissing him. But Dante stopped.

Shaking his head, he stepped back, those warm velvet eyes looked hunted as footsteps approached.

It was Penny and Max. The owner of the ranch slapped his hand on Dante’s back and the two of them walked off, leaving me and Penny with Rosie.

A few minutes later, I asked Penny to watch my little girl while I sought Dante out. I had to know if he was feeling the same way I was.

Something about that kiss had started a fire in my blood, and I wanted, no, I needed him to help me figure it out. Only when I did find him, he was talking to Max.

“I can’t. She’s a mom with too many responsibilities!”

Dante’s rough words had stopped me cold, and I left that night without talking to him. In fact, I’d been avoiding him since. Throughout the holidays, I’d managed to keep my distance.

But Rosie’s birthday was next week, and she’d asked if Danny—that was her nickname for Dante—could come to her party.

What kind of mom would I be if I said no? Besides, we were having it at the ranch. That would be kind of rude of me to leave him out.

I had the invitation with his name on it in my purse, along with the handful of others I’d addressed and placed in stamped envelopes.

Dante might not be the man for me, but he was kind to my daughter. She loved the big cowboy, and that was enough for me to invite him.

Like I already said, I would do anything for my Rosie.

Ignoring the big, burly man wasn’t going to be easy. But I’d manage.

All I had to do was remember he didn’t want me.

Oh no. Not a mama with a ready-made family.

Mr. Sexy Cowpoke wanted a virgin, some mythical, untouched maiden to fit perfectly in his little fantasy world where women stayed barefoot and pregnant in his kitchen.

Guys like him all wanted a real damsel in distress type. The kind where he could play knight in shining fur or whatever for however long it took until he got bored and moved on to greener pastures, and well, I simply wasn’t that.

Rosie was irrefutable evidence of that I was about as far from virginal as you could get.

I couldn’t say I was surprised by Dante’s rejection of me. But I was disappointed.

Terribly disappointed.

I needed to get over it and him. Because honestly? I didn’t have time to waste on someone who didn’t want me or couldn’t accept me as I was.

Not even big, sexy someones who treated my little girl like a princess and was as polite and gentle as he was hulking and handsome.

Okay, I was being ridiculous.

Mourning him was idiotic.

One kiss did not a relationship make, and even though I thought it was pretty nice— and by that I meant earth shattering —Dante clearly did not feel the same.

I was much better off having shoved the confounded man into the friend-zone where my desire for him should hopefully die a quick death.

Only, it wasn’t working.

I still dreamed about him. Still pictured him when I used my little personal massager in the dark of night when I was all alone in my bed.

Shit.

The bell rang, its sharp, familiar tone echoing down the hallways and signaling the countdown: two more hours to go.

I let out a slow breath, reminding myself that I could get through it.

Most days, being a school nurse was fulfilling.

The small victories kept me going—patching up scraped knees, soothing anxious students, and occasionally being the only adult who really listened to a kid in need.

But today wasn’t most days.

After Mr. Dryden’s little revelation about talking with Rosie, my mood had taken a nosedive.

Time crawled, and I was still reeling from that jerk’s words.

No father at home.

What did Dryden, or anyone else for that matter, know about mine or Rosie’s lives?

I never knew much about the man who’d fathered her. He wasn’t exactly my boyfriend or anything.

Just a guy I had a one-night stand with that resulted in me getting pregnant at just twenty-three years old.

That kind of thing happened a lot, right?

It didn’t make me a bad person. I wasn’t a tramp or easy or whatever else it was my own parents had said when I’d told them the news.

It took a long time for me to get over their rejection, but I was fine with it now. We didn’t need that kind of negativity.

My parents had no part in mine or Rosie’s life. Neither would anyone who talked down to me or my child.

Screw anyone who thought they had the right to that.

Her father was supposed to be just a one night stand. He’d been passing through town. Just another cowboy competing on the Northeastern circuit.

I’d seen him before. We’d flirted whenever he came to our own little Cow Country Rodeo. That year he’d been through a few times.

His name was Nicky Crowden.

He’d been big and handsome with the same crooked grin my Rosie had.

No, I didn’t regret a single minute of the night we’d shared for one simple fact. He gave me her.

Nicky showed up about two months after she was born. And again when she had her first birthday. That was when he’d cleaned out the emergency funds coffee can I’d kept in my kitchen on top of the fridge.

I’d had about six hundred dollars saved at the time and had been planning on using it to start a college fund for Rosie.

After that, I never heard from him again. And that was still too soon for me.

The bastard.

There’d been no one since then. I mean, I’d shied away from men, choosing to focus on my daughter.

It’d obviously been the right choice since the one man I’d been attracted to since Nicky had turned me down flat.

I’d seen Dante several times since Jezebel’s wedding. He’d tried talking to me, but honestly, I didn’t want to hear it. I usually raised my hand and said no before he even opened his mouth.

I was being rude, but whatever.

Clearly, my man radar was broken.

I’d only just considered trying to date again when Mr. Dryden appeared at school. Two conversations in the lounge and the creep thought he could parent my daughter.

Hell. No.

The idea of him anywhere near her made my blood run cold. Dryden’s involvement just felt wrong.

And I was through feeling charitable. With him. With everyone.

My hands tightened around the clipboard I picked up as I went to watch the students in the hall.

I forced myself to loosen my grip before I snapped it in half.

Two more hours till I could take my sweet girl home and leave this place behind for the weekend.

I could do this. I’d been through worse.

Still, the weight of everything felt like it was pressing down on me.

Here I took care of cuts and bruises. I doled out Band-aids and sugar free lollipops, making the boo-boos go away.

Usually, I took pride in my work. In my ability to offer sympathy and compassion to these kids when they were away from their parents.

But today, it felt like I was losing ground.

Self-doubt crept in and I wondered if I wasn’t a terrible mother, after all. It was my biggest fear. Every parent’s biggest fear. That something lacking in me was causing Rosie’s upset.

That I was to blame for it.

I sighed and offered a wan smile to the passing kindergartners who waved as they walked to the cafeteria.

I had enough on my mind without that unfortunate kiss taking up residency like it was paying rent.

It was best not to think about big dumb men who made me crazy.