Page 68 of Collateral Claim

I hope he’s not very good at oral sex.

I hope he sucks.

No. that’s counterproductive.

Teeth graze my thigh, then bite.

I’m hot. Burning. My channel pulses with need. My hands are on my breasts, and I squeeze them. Nipples harden under my palms.

Endo swipes a finger over my panties. “You’re wet.”

“I am not.”

Ha! As if he can’t tell. But again, deny or die of shame for being wet for my enemy.

“You talk so much smack, but your pussy doesn’t lie. She’s sopping wet for me.” He pinches my clit, and I yelp.

“Ouch.”

He smacks it.

“Ouch?” I don’t know why I formed the pain response into a question or why my hips lift as if I’m seeking more. I can’t possibly want him to slap me down there. Do I?

“Yes, you did like that. Here it is again.” He smacks my clit. My panties should be dry, yet they’re anything but. My body should stop burning for him. For my captor.

Am I turned on because he’s wrong for me?

“For a woman who’s done everything right in her life, you wet easily for the wrong man.” A finger sneaks under my panties and moves them aside.

Endo is in my head.

I anticipate the feel of his mouth. The feel of his trimmed beard scraping all the right places while his smooth tongue soothes by licking everything his stubble scraped. My body is ready. When he doesn’t lick me, I lift my hips.

That earns me another slap.

Oh no. I like this too much. If I were nineteen, I could claim cluelessness with plausible deniability of what I like and dislike, but I’m thirty and I know (I fucking know) he’s stroking every desire I’ve worked to suppress. The hidden, dirty ones I’m afraid that, when I’m with this man, will come forward.

“I might tie you up and use my belt on your ass cheeks.”

“You would do that?”

For fuck’s sake.

It’s obvious I haven’t explored sex with a dominant man. I’m unsure what I’m getting myself into. Judging by my reactions, I’m into whatever Endo is doing. Maybe I like some pain. Not too much, I hypothesize. But by nature, I’m curious, so I’d like to find out. I find things out by actually doing them, not just by thinking about them.

Endo presses his tongue against my opening and licks me like he’s tasting a scoop of vanilla ice cream from a cone. My thoughts die. All of what I am is now between my legs. My muscles tingle in anticipation of another lick.

He indulges me, swiping his tongue once, twice, three times, again like he’s eating ice cream.

“You are as sweet as I thought you would be.”

The bed moves, and I look down to see Endo’s elbow. I think he’s touching himself. I don’t know why that turns me on more, but it does. He pulls my clit into his mouth and sucks.

I moan, closing my eyes as I imagine his fist pumping his length. I bet Endo is big, wide, smooth, and hard. At least I hope what he’s doing to me makes him hard. I’d like to think he’s turned on by me as much as I’m turned on by what he’s doing to me.

Sadly, he’s not bad at oral.

Not at all.