Page 34 of Collar Me Crazy (Hollow Oak Mates #8)

RYKER

T he dreams came just before dawn, slipping into Ryker's sleeping mind like poison in still water. He was dimly aware of Sonya's warm weight against his side, her breathing deep and peaceful, but the visions pulled him down into darkness.

He stood in the sanctuary's main clearing, but everything was wrong.

The buildings were charred ruins, the healing pools turned black with corruption.

In the midst of the devastation, Sonya lay motionless, her body twisted at an unnatural angle, blood pooling beneath her from wounds that could only have come from massive claws.

His claws.

"You did this," a voice whispered from the shadows. Not the Void's alien hunger, but something that sounded disturbingly like his own inner fears. "This is what happens when monsters try to love."

The vision shifted. Hollow Oak's main square, but filled with bodies instead of celebration. Every person he'd come to care about—Callum and Cora, Emmett and Katniss, all of them— lying dead while shadow creatures feasted on the magical energy that had once protected the town.

"The claiming ritual," the voice continued. "The moment you marked her, the bond exploded outward. Too much power, too much chaos. You gave the Void what it needed to break through completely."

Another shift. The destruction spreading beyond Hollow Oak, reality tearing apart as the entity consumed both realms. Cities burning, supernatural creatures hunted to extinction, the human world collapsing into darkness and despair.

All because he'd been selfish enough to believe he deserved happiness.

"This is your true destiny," the voice said with cruel satisfaction. "Not salvation, but destruction. The prophecy was always about this moment—when the bloodmoon wolf's love would doom everything he touched."

Ryker tried to turn away from the visions, but they followed him. Sonya's face, beautiful and trusting, transforming into accusation and terror as she realized what he truly was. Her voice, which had spoken of love and faith, now screaming his name in betrayal and pain.

"You could prevent this," the voice whispered. "Leave now, before the claiming. Disappear into the mountains where you can't hurt anyone. Let the other seven couples hold the barrier without you. It's the only way to save them all."

The logic was seductive, poisonous. He'd spent thirty years believing this exact thing—that isolation was safety, that love was danger, that caring about people inevitably led to their destruction. The visions felt more real than the warm bed, more true than Sonya's sleeping form beside him.

He jerked awake, cold sweat beading on his skin despite the cabin's warmth. The pre-dawn darkness felt oppressive, thick with malevolent presence that made his wolf pace frantically beneath his ribs.

Beside him, Sonya stirred. "Ryker? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Bad dream." He slipped from the bed, needing distance from her trusting warmth. "Go back to sleep."

But she was already sitting up, her brown eyes sharp with concern even in the dim light. "That wasn't just a dream. I can feel your distress."

Their connection. The bond that was supposed to save everyone but would instead doom them all. Ryker pulled on his jeans, his hands shaking with residual terror from the visions.

"Talk to me," Sonya said, reaching for him.

"Don't." He stepped back, the word coming out harsher than intended. "Just... don't touch me right now."

Pain flickered across her features, but she lowered her hand. "What did you see?"

"The truth." His voice sounded hollow even to his own ears. "What happens when I mark you today. What happens when the bond completes."

"Ryker—"

"You die, Sonya. In my arms, because of my claws, because the claiming goes wrong and the energy tears you apart." The words tumbled out, driven by fear so deep it felt like drowning. "Everyone dies. The whole town, both realms, everything we're trying to protect."

"Those weren't real visions. They were manipulation?—"

"How do you know?" He spun to face her, desperation making his voice crack. "How do you know your visions are right and these are wrong? What if everything we've planned is exactly what the Void wants?"

Sonya rose from the bed, wrapping herself in his discarded shirt. The sight of her wearing his clothes, looking so perfectly right in his space, made his heart clench with renewed terror.

"Because I know you," she said simply. "And I know us. Whatever you saw, it wasn't the truth."

"Wasn't it? My pack died because of what I am. Everyone I've ever cared about has paid the price for my existence." He grabbed a duffel bag from the closet, throwing clothes into it with jerky, panicked movements. "I should have learned from that. Should have stayed away from here, from you."

"What are you doing?"

"What I should have done weeks ago. Leaving." He couldn't look at her as he packed, couldn't bear to see the betrayal that was surely building in her eyes. "The other couples can hold the barrier without the eighth bond. They'll be safer without me here to screw everything up."

"You can't be serious." Her voice carried disbelief rather than anger. "After everything we've shared, everything we've planned, you're just going to run away?"

"I'm protecting you."

"You're protecting yourself." He could hear the pain and anger growing in her voice. "You're so afraid of being hurt again that you'd rather destroy what we have than risk it."

"If what we have destroys everyone else, then yes.

" He shouldered the bag, finally meeting her eyes.

The pain there nearly drove him to his knees, but he forced himself to remain standing.

"I won't be responsible for your death, Sonya.

I won't watch the Void use our bond to tear apart everything we care about. "

"The Void is using your fear right now." He could see the tears beginning to gather. "It's manipulating your worst instincts, making you believe that isolation equals safety."

"Maybe it does."

"And maybe you're a coward who would rather run than fight for what he wants."

The words hung between them like a chasm. Ryker felt their partial bond straining, stretching thin as his decision to leave warred against every instinct that told him she was his mate, his other half, his reason for existing.

"Better a living coward than a dead hero," he said quietly.

"What about a living mate? What about the man who told me he loved me last night?"

"That man was deluding himself." He moved toward the door, each step feeling like walking through quicksand. "And deluding you too."

"Ryker, please." For the first time, her voice broke. "Don't do this. Don't let fear win."

He paused at the threshold, his hand on the doorknob. Behind him, he could feel her pain like a physical wound, their connection screaming in protest at what he was about to do.

"Take care of yourself, Sonya. Find someone who won't get you killed."

He opened the door and stepped into the pre-dawn cold, leaving behind the woman he loved and the future he'd briefly allowed himself to imagine. With each step away from the cabin, their bond stretched thinner, more fragile, until he felt something inside him tear with audible finality.

The partial connection they'd built over weeks of growing trust and intimacy snapped like an overstretched rope, leaving him hollow and aching in ways that had nothing to do with physical pain.

Behind him, he heard Sonya's cry of anguish as she felt the bond breaking too.

The sound nearly sent him running back to her, but the visions were still too fresh, too real.

Her death, the town's destruction, the collapse of both realms—all because he'd been selfish enough to believe in happy endings.

By the time he reached his truck, tears were streaming down his face. But he kept walking, kept moving away from everything that mattered, because sometimes love meant letting go.

Even when letting go felt like dying.