Page 42 of Claiming His Lost Duchess (The Dukes of Sin #8)
“It might sound pathetic and I hope I am not too late but… When I thought I might lose you — when I saw the pain in your eyes after I made those terrible accusations — I realized that my fear of being hurt was nothing compared to the agony of losing you entirely,” Joan explained quietly, almost as though she was afraid of disturbing the air between them.
She moved closer then, sinking to her knees on the edge of the blanket so that they were nearly at eye level.
“I realized that I…” She drew a shuddering breath, as though the words she was about to speak required every ounce of courage she possessed. “I love you, Graham. I love you so desperately, so completely, that it terrifies me more than anything else in this world ever has.”
The words hit Graham with full force. For months, he had dreamed of hearing her say those words, had hoped and prayed that someday she might feel even a fraction of what he felt for her.
Now, hearing them spoken with such raw honesty, such obvious vulnerability, he felt as though his heart might burst from his chest.
“I love you,” Joan repeated, her voice growing stronger with each word.
“Not because you are Sophia’s father, not because of what you have to offer, but because you are the most honorable, generous, wonderful man I have ever known.
Because when I am with you, I feel complete in a way I never imagined possible.
Because the thought of a future without you in it is more than I can bear. ”
Graham stared at her for a long moment, drinking in the sight of her face illuminated by the warm streams of sunlight, her eyes bright with love and hope and terrifying honesty.
Then something tight and painful in his chest finally released, and he reached for her with hands that trembled slightly with the force of his emotion.
“Joan,” he said roughly, gathering her into his arms as she fell willingly into his embrace. “My darling, silly, wonderful Joan.”
When their lips met, it was with all the passion and tenderness of their previous kisses combined with the deeper understanding they had fought so hard to achieve.
Graham tasted salt and realized that both of them were crying — tears of relief, of joy, of love finally acknowledged and returned.
His hands tangled in her hair, the soft strands slipping through her fingers as he brought her closer to him.
When they finally broke apart, both were breathing heavily. Graham rested his forehead against hers, his hands framing her face as though she were something infinitely precious and fragile.
“I love you too,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper but carrying all the conviction of a sacred vow. “God, Joan, I have loved you since that first night at the inn. I have never stopped loving you, not for a single moment of a single day.”
Joan’s laugh was watery but genuine, a sound of pure joy that made Graham’s heart soar higher than it had in days. “Truly? Even when I have been such a stubborn, mistrustful creature?”
“Especially then,” Graham replied, brushing away her tears with gentle thumbs.
“Your caution, your wariness — they were born of pain and betrayal, not malice. How could I fault you for protecting yourself when the world had given you every reason to expect the worst from those who claimed to care for you?”
“But you never gave me reason to doubt,” Joan protested. “From the very beginning, you have been nothing but kind and patient and?—”
“And you have been healing,” Graham interrupted firmly. “Learning to trust again after years of abuse and neglect. Did you think I expected you to simply forget your past the moment you spoke marriage vows? Love is not so simple, Joan, nor should it be.”
She searched his face as though looking for some sign of deception, smiling when she found none. “When you said you searched for me for five years… you truly meant it?”
“Every word.” Graham’s voice was rough with remembered pain. “Five years of wondering if you were safe, if you were happy, if you had found someone to protect and care for you as you deserved. And now, you are here. Mine. And I have no intention of letting you go.”
They kissed again, softer this time but no less meaningful. Graham poured all of his love, all of his forgiveness, all of his hopes for their future into that single kiss, and felt Joan respond with equal fervor.
He pulled her closer, aching for more of her to taste and lose himself in, trailing kisses from her lips, down her neck.
“Where’s Sophia?” he asked against her jaw, teasingly sinking his teeth into her flesh.
“W-With Margaret. She came to take her after breakfast, so she could spend some time with her cousins,” Joan gasped, her hands braced on her husband’s shoulders.
Graham smiled, eager to consummate the new found stability of their relationship.
He detached himself from Joan, only long enough to rise to his feet and lift her into his arms.
“What do you think about spending the rest of the day exploring the bounds of our love, my beautiful duchess?” he proposed, already carrying her back to the house.
Joan giggled and he swore he’d never heard a more beautiful thing in his life.
“I would love nothing more.”