Page 59 of Choose Us

“What?” She mumbled through a mouth full of bread.

“Nothing.”I shrugged.

“No, tellme, Holly.”

“I’mjust happy.”

It was true. I couldn’t hold the eye contact any longer, so I focused more intently on pulling a piece of bread apart whilst I continued. “I can’t think of anywhere in the world I’d rather be than here watching you politely stuff your face with pastry.Genuinely.”

“Not even Bali? The Bahamas? Maldives?”

“Nope.” I shook my head. The next part slipped out. “Not without you.”

As soon as I said it, Brooke’s face dropped. She looked concerned. I’d said too much.

“Holly...”

“Don’t say anything. I’m sorry. It’s too much. I know.”

“You leave in like six days. I... There’s something I need tosay to you.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I know it’s too difficult. I’m an idiot for thinking.”

“What? What are you thinking?” Brooke stepped in closer and placed her hand in mine. “Tellme, Holly.”

“There isn’t anything to tell is there?” I sighed.

I placed the Kashi Pan on the wall and stared out towards the river. I felt Brooke’s hand move from my neck to my cheek, turning my head tolook at her.

“Do you love me?” she whispered.

“Youknow I do.”

Hadn’t I madethat clear?

“Tell me,” Brooke repeated. “Tell me you love me.”

“I love you. I’ll always love you.”

That wasthe problem.

“Then tell me what you’re thinking,”she pleaded.

I got the feeling she wanted me to say something specific. Did she want another declaration of my love? For what reason? Maybe, just like I needed the mysterious clarity I’d been searching for, she needed some form of reassurance, but I couldn’t understand or work out why.

Brooke softly kissed my lips. She stood with one hand tightly clasped in mine and the other playing withmy necklace.

“I’ve never noticed this before.” She manoeuvred the oblong silver pendant, twisting it in her fingers until she caught sight of the writing on the opposite side. “What’s this?”

“It’s just a phrase in Japanese. I saw it at a market in London about a year ago. It stood out to me.” For a reason much deeper than the fashionable element of the necklace.

“Does it say––” she realised.

“Love, always.” I wiped my forehead. The heat was almost unbearable. We took shade under a large blossom tree, but the humidity and Brooke pressed up against me made it hard to regulate my bodytemperature.

“Did you get that for me?” she asks gingerly.

I should have made a joke, but instead I told the truth.