Page 70

Behind the barn.

On the front porch.

In the bed of his truck, and on the hood of it too.

He has her everywhere he can, every way he can.

Except for all the way.

Even that, he doesn’t think will be enough.

I wonder if Lux drives me to and from Ponderosa Falls because she wants to make sure I actually go to my meeting, or if it’s because Jackson is too traumatized to see me in a truck.

Both are probably true—the former, definitely. An hour after I walk into the community center, I walk out to find Lux parked in the exact same spot I left her in, a thin layer of undisturbed snow tattling on her.

As for the latter… well, I take one step into the main house and Jackson hastily averts his gaze, some red finding its way into his tan complexion, so I think that confirms it.

I don’t get the time to tease him though—a little voice hollering my name commands my attention right before a just-as-little body slams into my legs.

“Do you have it?” the toddler clinging to me demands.

“Depends.” I drop to my haunches, toying dramatically with the magnetic clasp keeping the stuffed tote bag hanging off my arm closed. “What do I get if I do?”

I’m only teasing Alex. The knitted blanket that damn near took a year off my life is his, no matter what.

I’m already reaching for it when he sighs and shuffles an inch closer.

I go still as his arms slink around my neck and his body slumps against me, bringing us nose-to-nose.

Those big, brown eyes blinking sweetly, he croons, “Please, Auntie Lottie?”

Like he’s lulled me into a goddamn trance, I nod slowly, my voice coming out softer than I’ve ever heard it. “All yours, kiddo.”

My nephew’s squeal warms my cheeks a second before wet, sticky lips do. Snatching the blanket that’s almost identical to the one I made him, he sprints the short distance to the sofa where his cousin and his youngest aunt sit, handing it over like he made the thing all by himself.

Still crouching, I shift my gaze to his mother. “I feel manipulated.”

Lux smiles grimly like she knows the feeling, but she still quips, “Sounds like a you problem.”

Speaking of problems—as my eyes rove the room and don’t find who they’re looking for, unnerving, unnecessary disappointment settles in my gut. “Where’s Finn?”

My sister-in-law snickers. “He’s hiding.”

“Why?”

Bug-eyed and silent, she points to the man hunched over the counter, chopping vegetables.

I groan and throw my empty tote at my brother’s back. “What did you say to him?”

“Nothing you didn’t hear.” Jackson turns around and before my very eyes, I watch him shift from older brother to the only father figure I’ve ever known . “Do we need to have a talk?”

My brows raise. “A talk?”

He drops his chin, and I sigh.

“We had the talk.” I remember every agonizing moment of it.

I was thirteen. He was seventeen. We were both deeply uncomfortable.

I can’t imagine he’s too keen to recreate the ordeal.

“You did the whole banana thing. You took me to get an IUD. I took notes.” With raised brows, I glance at his one-and-a-half-year-old surprise. “Did you?”

When Lux barks a laugh, our brother’s scowl shifts to her. “What’re you laughing at, Juno?”

“ Technically ,” I butt in before things get ugly. “You should be worrying about Grace, not me. She’s the next oldest. If the Jackson curse is gonna get anyone, it’s her.”

More than one person questions, “The Jackson curse?”

“Y’know.” I wave a vague hand, lowering my voice so the younger members of our family don’t overhear. “Twenty-something and accidentally pregnant out of wedlock. Baby daddy is a dick.”

Jackson huffs an offended noise.

“ Fine . That last bit is subjective.”

“Our children are not a curse.”

“No,” I agree with Lux. “Just curse d .”

She rolls her eyes, flicking me on the temple. “No one is cursed.”

“Lottie might be a little,” Luna quips. A second later, she snaps her fingers. “No, sorry. I meant possessed .”

As the others chortle, I shoot each of them the stink-eye. “Oh, The Pregnancy Pact’s got jokes, huh?”

Lux itches her nose with her middle finger. “Go find your boyfriend.”

“ Gladly .”

“Make him wear a condom!”

I wink at Luna before ducking out the front door. “No promises.”

Jackson groans so loud, the noise follows me across the yard.

I’m still chuckling to myself when I reach the barn. I move to slip through the ajar door only to pause, to lean against the wooden frame, to hold my damn breath, a little fucking fearful that the slightest disturbance will ruin the sight I greedily soak up.

Finn’s got my sweet girl, my Daphne, tied up in the aisle. Hunched over by her flank, he mumbles soothingly as he carefully inspects the hoof trapped between his thighs. He works meticulously, gently, and I just… watch. Admire , if I’m being completely, embarrassingly honest.

I wait until he’s finished, until Daphne’s stall door is shut and secure before making my presence known. “Didn’t take you for a coward, Akello.”

Finn doesn’t so much as twitch, like he knew I was there all along “It’s called self-preservation, baby.”

I saunter towards him, eyeing the bulge of his biceps as he unties the knot around his neck and slips off his apron.

Overwhelmed by some odd, affectionate urge, I hook my fingers through the belt loops of his jeans, my thumbs grazing the lower stomach exposed by another one of his damn too-short shirts. “Oh?”

“My boss caught me doing very dirty things to his little sister.”

“His least favorite little sister.”

That handsome face frowns. “Don't say that.”

“It’s called self-awareness, baby.” I dance one set of fingers up his torso and pat his chest. “Trust me. He doesn’t care. Yesterday was a joke.”

He doesn't believe me. But it’s not just doubt lurking in his gaze as he peers down at me.

There’s something else too—something sad.

Something to match whatever’s about to come out of his opening mouth, and though I’m not one-hundred-percent-sure what that might be, I do know that I don’t want to hear it.

Or more like I don’t want to hear my reaction to it.

“Fine.” I step back abruptly, feigning a dramatic sigh as I cross my arms over my chest. “We can stay out here.”

Finn lifts a brow— what’s the catch?

“But just so you know, they definitely think you’re railing me right now.”

Spluttering a noise that’s part laugh, part groan, Finn shakes his head as he grabs my hand and starts tugging me towards the main house. “C’mon, trouble.”

“That was quick,” Luna greets as we re-enter the house—as I drag an uncharacteristically shy Finn in my wake.

It does occur to me, vaguely and at some point, that I should be feeling as uncomfortable as he does. That walking into my family home holding the hand of a man my siblings know and like—holding the hand of a man, full fucking stop—is not a regular occurrence. So it shouldn’t feel like one.

Pondering that, on the other hand, does make me uncomfortable. Makes me drop his hand and tuck mine into my back pocket. It doesn’t, however, stop me from quipping, “Yeah, well. I’m very good.”

Two male groans echo off the walls. And a feminine one too as Lux pulls a face. “That was too much, kid.”

I jerk a thumb in Luna’s direction. “Tell Teen Mom over there.”

She shrieks. “I was almost twenty-four when Izzy was born!”

I snort, but I put a stopper on my wit because Luna’s starting to get that devious glint in her eyes and I don’t want to poke the bear more than I already have. Not when six-feet-something worth of ammunition is lurking at my back.

In case I needed another reason to love him, Alex steals everyone’s attention as he clamors for Finn’s.

And as my boyfriend rushes to oblige, daring to peck the top of my head as he passes by, I turn to my brother where he’s acting like the simmering pot on the stove requires his full, unrelenting attention.

Leaning against the counter beside him, I mutter, “Don’t scare him off.”

“Funny.” He looks at me sideways. “I was gonna say the same thing to you.”

“ Ha ha ,” I drawl, but it’s not all that humorous because, as we lock eyes, it strikes me that there’s a different kind of talk we need to have. And I think it strikes Jackson at the exact same moment because his slightly amused expression fades, tightens, and I sigh. “Lux told you everything?”

“You know she did.”

Right. Yeah. They’ve got a code, woven into that parentified older sibling bond of theirs.

They won’t keep important things from each other, not when it’s about the rest of us.

I’m surprised Lux didn’t spill the beans the moment my slip happened—I only know she didn’t because Jackson didn't cut his honeymoon short just for the honor of lecturing me.

Which he doesn’t do, surprisingly.

He gingerly, unobtrusively asks, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

I shake my head, and he doesn’t push. He doesn’t sigh, all irritated. He just wraps an arm around my shoulders, tugs me into the side, and kisses the top of my head. “Love you, kid.”

“Love you too.”

“I mean it, yeah? Don’t scare him off.”

“I’ll try.”

“And don’t get pregnant.”

I shove him away from me, shaking my head. “Jesus, Oscar.”

“Y’know, maybe we shouldn’t send you two out alone anymore.”

“You know we live together, right?”

Jackson groans.

“Don’t worry.” I aim a set of knuckles at his ribs. “I’ll wait until I’m almost twenty-four.”

About five seconds after I hear the front door creak open, a figure appears in the doorway of Alex’s bedroom.

Leaning against the doorjamb with a hand propped on her hip, Grace glances at the little boy I’ve been tasked with babysitting, snoozing on the bed I’m leaning against, before whispering, “Care to tell me why Jackson just welcomed me home by throwing a pack of condoms at my head?”

I snort quietly. “Be grateful it wasn’t a chastity belt.”