Page 19 of Caught by the Highland Beast (A Highlander’s Oath #5)

19

“ T halia!” A voice jolted her from her thoughts, and she turned to see Diana and the twins rushing toward her.

“Are you daydreaming?” Diana teased, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

Thalia forced a smile, pushing thoughts of her evening with Finn to the far reaches of her mind. She had seen him only once since, and it was over in the blink of an eye. By now, she had thought their paths might have crossed again in some way — accidental meeting in the hallway or perhaps over luncheon — but there had been no sign of him.

That morning, he had rushed through the dining hall and out to the stables, grabbing only a breakfast roll on his way out — without a word or acknowledgement to her while she sat quietly at the table.

“Just thinking,” she said lightly. “What are you three up to?”

As Arabella dove into a hefty description of what they had been up to that morning, Thalia’s thoughts drifted back to the way Finn had touched her. The way he had kissed her. The way he had made her feel things she had never experienced before.

“And the wedding. We were wondering if Finn will wear something special,” Diana added which snapped Thalia back into the present once again.

“Finn?” Thalia repeated, trying to ignore the way her heart skipped at the mention of his name.

Her three sisters nodded their heads in unison, almost knowingly. “Yes, Finn. You’re marrying him, remember?” Caroline said with a giggle.

“I have not forgotten,” Thalia replied dryly though her pulse quickened at the thought of standing beside him, of saying their vows. But she couldn’t allow herself to dwell on that. “And I’m sure he will be wearing whatever is appropriate for the occasion. Saoirse and Rowan mentioned that he’ll be in his colors.”

Arabella, ever the romantic, clasped her hands together. “Do you think it will be a tartan? I think he would look so handsome in it. Don’t you, Thalia?”

Thalia smiled, despite herself. The twins had been surprising fond of Finn after their late-night escape went wrong. The shift had not gone unnoticed. It seemed as though their fear of him had melted away.

Perhaps it was the way he had handled their adventure, or perhaps it was something else, but whatever it was, her sisters now seemed to adore him — a point that made Thalia feel guilty again about even having the thought to separate them.

“I’m not sure what Finn will wear, specifically,” Thalia said, her smile widening at the memory of his hands on her body.

A flush crept into her cheeks, and Diana grinned. “Oh, we’ll find a way to ask him.”

Caroline’s eyes lit up. “Oh, yes! Yes, we will indeed!”

Arabella followed it up, saying, “We will make sure he looks dashing!”

Thalia laughed though her heart gave a little tug. There was something lovely about the way things had shifted in the house. They had even taken to calling him by his first name.

She couldn’t deny the attraction between herself and Finn — the passion from the night before was still a burning memory in her mind — but there was a distance too. A barrier she felt that he had built between them, and she didn’t know how to tear it down.

Is it all still a transaction, even though he told me he wanted me?

She squeezed her legs together tightly thinking about just how badly she had wanted him, begged him last night. The memory of his admission and how the words so melodically rolled off his expert tongue, “Ye deserve to know how much I wanted ye.”

I need to find him.

She pressed herself to standing and excused herself back inside the castle. Wandering through the corridors, she wondered what she was going to say to him when she found him.

His study had been empty. The dining hall empty.

Finally, she chanced a glance through the window and saw that he was sitting lazily underneath a tree in the lower garden, surrounded by her sisters.

“Finn?” she said as she walked up to them quickly.

Her sisters’ faces all lit up as she neared.

He looked up, his expression softening slightly when he saw her. “Thalia.” His voice was gruff but not unkind, and a small grin played at the corners of his mouth. “What brings ye here?”

She hesitated as they all were now looking to her for her answer. “I just noticed that you were here, so I came to join!”

“Perhaps ye are part of this plan to involve me in the planning of our nuptials?”

Thalia’s eyes fell on Diana’s, currently feigning innocence with a cheshire smile. “Oh no, I’m not actually… are you?” she said and raised an eyebrow playfully.

“Aye, apparently I am now…” His demeanor was still relaxed, but the lines on his face told another story.

“Let this man get back to his day, girls.” Thalia’s voice was slightly harsher than she desired, but it had the right effect on them.

Caroline squared her shoulders and said, “All right, we are finished with our business anyway. You may go.”

“Caroline!” Thalia scolded lightly, and Finn chuckled lowly.

“Thank ye, lass. I best be going,” he said with a wink.

A wink?!

As he stood, he tilted his head ever so slightly toward the far end of the garden, and she twisted on her heel to walk with him in that direction.

“Ye were lookin’ for me, Thalia?” The way he addressed her was more formal than she anticipated. Yet, the way he said her name reminded her of the previous night again, and she got frustrated by their distance. She had a taste of what it would be like with him, and she knew she wanted more.

“I was,” she said briefly.

“What about?”

“I just wanted to talk to you about… everything.” She twisted her hand and waved it along the flower bush next to her, careful to touch the petals with care.

“Alright,” he said, and gestured to the bench ahead on their path. “Sit.”

There was something about the way he told her what to do that made her want to comply without argument. So, she sat, folding her hands in her lap as he joined her.

The silence stretched between them like a chasm.

“You’ve been… busy,” she said eventually and adjusted her legs so that she could face him.

Finn’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t deny it. “I’ve had a lot on me mind,” he said, his tone evasive.

His gaze met hers, and for a moment, Thalia thought he might open up by saying more, but then he looked away.

“I can’t help but think that you are ignoring me after —“

“After last night?” he said, his tone dripping with incredulity.

She flinched almost imperceptibly. “Well…?”

“Ye think I’m ignoring ye?”

Thalia looked at him, holding his gaze now, her frustration building. “I just feel that way, yes. I know you have a wall up for everyone, but I thought at least it would come down — even slightly — for me.”

He leaned back on the bench, his arms crossed over his broad chest, studying her as if weighing his response. “A wall, ye say?”

“Yes,” she said, fidgeting with the fabric of her dress. “You’re here, but you aren’t really… It’s like there’s something you are holding back. And after last night —” Thalia’s cheeks flushed as she spoke. “— I thought we’d gotten closer, but are you pulling away?”

Finn exhaled deeply, his brow furrowing. “Thalia, it’s nae that simple.”

“It never is,” she muttered under her breath.

His lips twitched slightly, almost a smile. “Aye, I suppose that’s true.”

Why did he always have to be so hard to read? One minute, he was kissing me, the next he was shutting me out!

But just as she was about to speak again, a loud giggle interrupted them.

“Finn! Finn, you have to hear this!” Arabella’s voice rang out as she ran toward them, her face flushed with excitement. Behind her, Caroline followed with an equally mischievous grin.

Thalia’s lips quirked as the twins grabbed each of his hands and tugged him to his feet. “Come on, you have to help us!”

“Help ye?”

“Yes! We’re trying to decide which flowers to use for the wedding, and you need to pick!”

“Flowers?” he asked, his expression was one of bewilderment.

“Yes!” Arabella sung, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “It’s your wedding too, you know. You should have a say.”

“I doubt I’ve much talent in flower choosin’, lass, and I have to get to it.”

Arabella’s face fell. “But you’ll be great at it; it’ll be so fast. Please?”

Finn’s gaze found Thalia’s, and she knew it was a silent plea for help. She obliged. “Girls, let him choose later, please. We’re in the middle of something?”

“We’ll let him off for now,” Caroline conceded, and the two of them dropped his hands and skipped back to where Diana still sat.

“They’ve taken quite a liking to you,” Thalia said when they were out of earshot.

“Seems so. Though I reckon they’re tryin’ to drive me mad.”

“You’re good with them.”

He shrugged and sat back down next to her. “Full of energy.”

They sat in silence only for a brief moment until Finn broke it. His gaze was more serious as he turned to face her. “Thalia, I ken ye think I’m keepin’ something from ye.”

She looked at him, her heart tightening at his words.

He signed, his expression softening. “I dinnae mean to shut ye out. It’s just, there are things I’ve yet to reckon with.”

Her breath caught in her throat at his admission.

What did that even mean?

Before she could ask, he sighed and pressed himself to standing. “I have to take care of some things before dinner. Excuse me.”

The backs of her eyes stung as she watched him disappear through the garden. Horse hooves retreated rhythmically on the grounds moments later.

Did he just actually run from this conversation?