Page 33 of Catching Our Moment
I nodded at him and tentatively reached for Kelcie’s hand, and she absently allowed me to hold it.
“TJ Smith thinks I’m brilliant. TJ SMITH!
The kids I play flag football with think I’m a fast runner and great at juking.
” He stared up at his father, who couldn’t even make eye contact with his son.
The decreasing difference in height between father and son gave this conversation more validity and weight.
Aaron wasn’t a little kid anymore. He was growing into a man, and he was well-aware of what people thought of him—including his parents.
“Of course my teachers think I’m smart. And then there’s my ultrasonic hearing, which is my superpower.
You and Mom seem to keep forgetting about it.
So, of course, I hear much more than you think I do. ”
“Aaron, son…” James’s pale face was flushed, hopefully with the shame and embarrassment he was experiencing at being caught speaking about his son that way.
Aaron broke eye contact, staring over his father’s shoulder instead. “I know you’re my dad and that you love me. But I don’t understand why you are so angry at me.”
Kelcie’s breath hitched. “Aaron, I don’t think?—”
“Honey, let them handle it,” I whispered.
She yanked her hand out of mine, letting me know I’d gone too far.
Her focus returned to Aaron and a backpedaling James. “Aaron, your father isn’t angry at you. Things are just complicated right now.”
James jumped in. “Aaron, it’s just that competitive sports in the past were very difficult for you to deal with?—”
“I was eight the last time you let me play baseball. It was boring. Of course I had time to argue with the umpire—he was an idiot,” Aaron said. “But I don’t understand why you’re saying these things about me.”
Kelcie stepped forward, and this time, I kept my mouth shut. “Okay, I think you gave your father some things to think about. Why don’t we sit with this and discuss it later? Maybe you can talk over the phone this week, or he can come up, and you can have lunch together next weekend.”
“I’m not sure about next weekend,” James said, hedging.
“You can’t be serious,” I barked and was cut off by another cold stare of death by Kelcie. Obviously, I was to stay out of it.
“Then two weeks,” Kelcie said, turning Aaron around. “Good night, James. Drive safe.” She nodded at the car.
We all stood silent as he left.
“Aaron, honey. Go on upstairs and give Shaw and me a minute.” She opened the door. Aaron stood, throwing me a quizzical look. “But Shaw said we’re going to watch the game together.”
“Shaw’s going back to his place for now.”
“Why?”
“Because I think we need some mother-son time.”
“But the games?—”
Kelcie closed her eyes and took in an unsteady breath. “Aaron, please.”
“Go on, my man. I think your mom needs some quiet time with you. Maybe we can catch the later games. It’s fine,” I said and gave him a wink and a smile. “You know how moms can be.” I shrugged and then mocked-whispered, “She missed you.”
He gave a dramatic eyeroll and said, “Fine.” Then he stomped upstairs as a way of having the last word.
I reached out to turn her around, to hold her and help carry some of the burden. “Honey, it will be?—”
She held her hand up to stop me. “I…I just need time to myself right now.” With James gone, her shield dropped enough for me to see her anger and frustration transitioning into sadness and even defeat.
She and I used to joke about knowing what each of us needed and when we needed it. I knew when to back off and give her space, and I knew when she needed comfort and support. It was our thing—it was a Kelcie-and-Shaw thing.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. “I mean, I know James was being an ass, and Aaron heard some painful things, but he handled him like a champ.”
“You shouldn’t have interfered,” she said, letting out a deep breath and allowing her shoulders to slump. “You just made everything worse.”
“Me?” I asked. “Why is this my fault? James swings into town and starts dictating how things are going to be, just to disappear for a few more months until he’s required to play Daddy again. How about he tries being a father?—”
“He is Aaron’s father. That’s the point. He is his father, and I have to deal with that.” She let out an exhausted breath. “I’ve had to deal with it for years.”
“I would’ve been—” I said softly.
“It wasn’t as easy as it appears now.” She dug her fingers into her eyes. “Aaron wasn’t as compliant and rational as he is now. He couldn’t tell me when he was sad, or hungry, or frustrated, or—” Her shoulders dropped before her voice quieted. “He couldn’t communicate.”
I never took my eyes off her. My girl was in such pain.
She’d gone through so much. And where the hell had I been?
Licking my wounds. Nursing my pride. Making millions and enjoying the surface, material side of life while she’d raised this amazing child.
She had changed. We both had. And we had to get to know who each other had become.
God, I wanted to hold her.
She took in a deep breath and straightened. “Yes, I know James is an ass. But trust me, you wouldn’t have wanted to have switched positions with him."
“I would’ve done it in a heartbeat.” I took a step toward her. “If I would’ve known you were so miserable, I would’ve been on your doorstep and insisted?—”
She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter.” Pinching the bridge of her nose and closing her eyes, she added, “The fact is I need to deal with him, and you rubbing it in that you have this relationship with Aaron is just making things more difficult.”
“I didn’t like how he was talking to you,” I said, and I meant it. I wasn’t going to sit by and let him dictate their lives.
She crossed her arms over her chest and gave me a sad smile. “I’m used to it—and I will deal with him.”
“But—” I wanted to tell her she wasn’t alone.
She put her hand up to stop me. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore. There isn’t anything we can do about the situation now, except try to not make it worse.”