Page 1

Things were finally on track for me.

My new life in Tennessee was coming together beautifully.

I had my new apartment, my job was going well, and I’d started to get friendly with a couple of coworkers.

Making this move had been the right thing to do.

I agonized over whether I should for a long time.

I wish I’d done it sooner.

I let past hurt, pain, regrets, and insecurities hold me back.

I’d been so afraid that I’d make mistakes or end up in situations I didn’t want to be in.

However, as the saying goes, I took the bull by the horns and made the move.

I was determined not to let Germain continue to rule my life or be that voice in my head that made me doubt myself.

Anytime I thought of my ex-husband, my stomach would churn, and I was filled with equal feelings of revulsion and anger.

Both emotions were aimed at him, and the anger was also aimed at me.

Why had I let our marriage and my life with him go on for so long? I’d been a fool.

I made a vow after I left him never to allow someone to do to me what he had done.

And never let myself accept anything less than the love, affection, and caring I deserved.

Making the move from Pensacola to Middle Tennessee had been long overdue.

I’d always wanted to live in gorgeous Tennessee.

I loved the scenery and its vibe.

Germain swore he would never live anywhere but Florida.

He was convinced only uneducated Southern yokels—his words, not mine—lived in the Southern states.

Florida was the only civilized one, in his opinion. I used to tell him it was further south than the others, making us the biggest yokels. My wit hadn’t amused him.

I transferred my job to work in the Nashville metro area, so I didn’t lose any pay or seniority.

Veterans Affairs had a VA Medical Center in Nashville and another in Murfreesboro, about thirty miles from the first one.

All it took was a mere transfer, and I was good to go.

I wanted to work in the Nashville area, but I didn’t want to live there.

It was too busy and crowded for me.

Instead, I found a lovely apartment in Mt.

Juliet, twenty miles from downtown.

I could drive or take the train and be there within half an hour.

Since it was only me, a one-bedroom, one-bath was big enough. I wouldn’t be having guests visit, so there was no need for a second bedroom.

It had been an enormous relief when the last packed box was loaded into the truck to bring all my possessions here.

It felt like I’d shed a hundred pounds.

Or more like a hundred and ninety pounds, the exact weight of my ex.

Over the past four months, I’ve worked to get myself into the groove at work.

Even though I was from a VA organization, each facility had nuances and quirks.

And then, you had to discover what your coworkers and bosses were like.

I’d found a few I thought I might be good friends with.

I found a few others I wanted to steer clear of.

Outside work, the apartment part had been a slight battle before I arrived.

It was a fast-growing area of the country, and rent and house prices were increasing yearly.

After finding my place, it was moving in and getting to know the neighborhood and town, where to shop, and places to avoid.

All of those kept me busy whenever I wasn’t working.

However, that was well underway, so it was time to attend to my personal life.

I was eager and nervous about that.

It wasn’t what most people would picture someone like me to be involved in.

When people looked at me, they saw a decently attractive woman in her early thirties who was a registered nurse.

And that was me, but only one side of me.

The other part was the woman who craved control of her sex life.

When I was with Germain, he always called the shots and never cared what my needs were, let alone if they were fulfilled.

It was all about him.

He scoffed at any attempts to ease him into ensuring both our needs and wants were fulfilled.

He would’ve fainted if I’d shared my true thoughts with him.

I might’ve been a virgin when we met, but over the years, my yearnings changed, and I became curious about many things.

But I’d never been able to tell him that, let alone try anything with him. If I had, he would’ve lost his temper and belittled me.

But after the divorce two years ago, I took what I’d secretly researched and been intrigued by and found a place for myself.

In doing so, I found someone to mentor me.

A whole wonderful world had opened up.

I hated to leave the club in Pensacola, but my connections there got me in contact with a club like theirs here in Nashville.

I’d filled out the paperwork and completed the background, interview, and education they required.

Now that work and home were good, it was time to go and check it out in person.

I was nervous.

You never knew if it would fit right, but I had high hopes.

I was impressed when I met with the manager.

His name was Reuben.

After he met me, I was introduced to the owner, Mikhail, and his fiancée, Tajah.

They’d put me further at ease. They joked and laughed as they showed me around. They did it during the day when the club was closed. They explained how things worked and how to ask for assistance if necessary. And they insisted that when I decided to come for the first time, I let them know. They’d personally escort me, or at least until I was comfortable with being left alone.

I’d been asked if I’d want to bring a guest or significant other.

I told them no to both.

I had no one I could ask to come, and I had no significant other, not even a play partner.

I hoped that by joining the House of Lustz, I might be able to find someone I could scene with.

I preferred when we were dedicated to each other, but it wasn’t a requirement.

For me, I was more into the scene as opposed to having sex. Sex was great, but I hadn’t found anyone in my old club whom I could do both with, so I stuck to being scene partners.

I’d chosen tonight to be the night I went to Lustz for the first time.

I wasn’t planning to dive into doing anything this visit.

I needed to get a feel for it when everyone was there.

I’d explore and watch some of the people.

I’d let Tajah and Mikhail know I would be there.

Tajah had responded. She was excited. We’d set a time, and they promised to meet and introduce me to a few people. She swore they wouldn’t cramp my style or expect me to hang with them all night.

I’d carefully studied their colored beads and what they meant.

I told Tajah what I wanted tonight—a white bead and an orange one.

Worn on the right wrist, they meant I was an observer and wasn’t there to play, so I wouldn’t be approached to do anything.

Assuming I liked it, subsequent visits would have those beads changing and more added.

I dressed more casually than I would normally if I’d been going to my old club.

I found dressing the part got me in the right frame of mind.

However, a pair of leather pants, cute heels, and a pretty blouse would be fine tonight.

My hair would be down, and my makeup subtle.

The drive to the club wasn’t bad at this time of night.

We’d agreed to meet at nine o’clock.

The parking lot was rather full, even though it was early for a place like this.

I found a parking spot and texted Tajah to let her know I was there and would meet them at the door.

Her reply came back within moments.

When I played, I didn’t carry a purse.

I stowed my identification, credit cards, cash, and keys in a tiny case I could put in my bra or snap to my belt loop.

Although, here, there were lockers you could use.

I’d have to see if I’d be open to using one.

Making sure I had everything, I got out and made my way to the door.

Out front, a man stood. He was a physically fit guy, probably around my age. He smiled and nodded.

“Good evening. Welcome to the House of Lustz. I’m Damir. May I have your name, and may I see your identification?”

Expecting this, I had my ID out. As I handed it to him, I smiled and answered him. “Hello, Damir. I’m Venus. Here’s my ID.”

I’d been instructed to use my club name if I had or wanted one, rather than my real one. Many people took on aliases to protect their true identities. Some didn’t bother. With my profession, I thought it was always wise to use one. Venus had been given to me in my old club by my mentor, so it was special to me. My ID would allow Damir to check me in. There should be a photo with my Venus name noted.

It took him seconds to find it. He smiled at me as he handed my card back. “You’re right here. Have a great time.”

“Thank you, I’m sure I will.”

He was reaching to open the door when it swung open. Out came Tajah, with Mikhail right behind her. She was smiling. “I’m so glad you finally came! Oh, God, you’re gonna love it. I promise. Thanks, Damir, we’ll take her from here,”

she told him.

“Sure thing, Taj. I didn’t know she was your friend,”

he said respectfully.

“I’m a new patron. They were sweet enough to insist on being my tour guides on my first time here,”

I told him.

Tajah slipped one of her arms through mine and gently hauled me toward the inside.

Mikhail was grinning, but he didn’t say anything besides hello.

I was introduced to the attendant in the foyer.

She was an older woman who would issue different-colored beads if needed and explain how they worked if you were unsure.

She issued my bracelet with the correct beads.

From there, we went through another door, bringing us to the club’s first level.

It was very different from the day I did my tour.

This time, there was music, dancing, conversations, and laughter.

You could hang out here, and it was like a typical nightclub.

There was a bar and everything.

However, if you wanted to watch or play, you had to go to the second floor.

Due to the nature of the business and the importance of consent and communication, they had a strict two-drink max rule.

You were marked to show how many you had.

They always reserved the right to say you couldn’t, even if you’d only had one alcoholic drink.

They both pointed out the various staff.

Each floor had a floor manager, waiters, consent monitors, roving security, and tour guides.

They asked if I wanted to hang out on the first floor for a bit before going upstairs.

I was too wound up to do that.

I shook my head and asked them to show me the second level.

They took me up in the elevator.

On the second floor, there was no alcohol.

There was a bar, but it only served non-alcoholic drinks.

Scattered around were various stages where you could watch or perform.

People could watch a variety of demonstrations.

In addition, they had rooms.

Most were themed based on your kink preference, and the theme was written on the door.

You could use a room and keep the door shut and the window covered for privacy, or for those who liked to be seen, there was the option of leaving them open.

After someone was done with a room, it would be cleaned and restocked, if needed, by a room attendant, called a Lustz Disciple.

There were small, raised areas where you could watch provocative dances and shows by staff, but they were merely for titillation.

No actual sex happened.

Taj was talking enthusiastically about it all.

You could tell she got into it and was proud of Lustz.

Mikhail interrupted her.

“You’ll have to forgive her. She loves to give all the details. It’s part of being an author. If she won’t let you speak, just signal me, and I’ll gag her.”

He smirked.

“Oops, I’m sorry. He’s right. It hasn’t gotten old for me yet. He’s run this place for years. I’ve only known about it for seven months,”

she explained.

“Don’t apologize. It’s refreshing to see you so happy. And Mikhail, from what I see, you have every reason to be proud of what you’ve built here. I liked my club in Pensacola, but it was not at this level,”

I assured him.

“I’m glad you like it. If you come this way, we’ll show you the latest addition. It was Tajah’s idea.”

We wound our way to the opposite side of the floor, and I discovered they had a store in there. You could buy toys, lube, dress-up clothing, you name it. Rather than a couple of shelves crammed in a corner, it was a decent-sized room with an attendant. I spent almost half an hour in there, becoming familiar with what they had. Taj and I talked about items they might want to add. She enthusiastically wrote them down.

As the night progressed, I was introduced to numerous people. Roughly half were patrons, and the rest were people who worked there. Reuben happened to be one of them. He told me it was about time I got myself in there. The night passed in a happy whirl for me. When I was ready to call it a night, I was escorted to my car. Tajah told me we should get together for coffee soon. I told her to let me know after the wedding. I’d discovered that she and Mikhail and two of their best friends were getting married in two weeks. I thought it was great that they were making it a double wedding.

Driving off toward home, I couldn’t stop smiling. Tonight had only compounded my certainty that moving here was the right thing to do. I was happier than I’d been since before I met Germain. I was looking forward to my next time here and coffee with Tajah in the near future.