Page 27

Calla

The boys seem to be relishing the challenge, and while I won’t deny that the view from up here is stunning, I’m more concerned about how high up we are.

I don’t know how much farther we’ll be going, or how long it will take us to reach the summit, but I’m already fighting back the terror I’m feeling.

I don’t like heights. When Doc and Clyde suggested going for a walk, I wasn’t expecting this. Considering where we are, I probably should’ve predicted that they’d want to go mountaineering and plan hikes up mountains.

I can handle being on a plane, or driving over bridges, but this is completely different. We ’re basically free climbing a damn mountain, with no ropes or anything to keep us from plummeting over the edge.

My head spins as I peek down at the ground below. The only reason I’ve made it this far without panicking is my boys. I don’t want them to think I’m weak for being too scared to do this with them, and they seemed so excited I couldn’t say no, even when we reached the bottom of this perilous trail.

The sensible part of me knows it’s not completely unsafe to be up here, otherwise there wouldn’t be marked trails and there would be ‘ No Entry ’ signs and fences preventing access.

However, the irrational part of me is thinking about how far down it is to level ground and considering all of the ways that things could go wrong.

It’s taking every ounce of my control to keep myself from panicking. It’s already harder to breathe, the last thing I need is to panic and start hyperventilating when the air is already thin.

I try to focus on the view instead of the drop, but it’s difficult to keep my eyes from scanning the ground below us. I take a deep breath, feeling my lungs burn as they protest the slight lack of oxygen and relief the action usually brings.

Breathing a little shallower, I try to regulate them instead, trying to keep myself from gasping. Thankfully, none of the boys seem to have noticed that anything is wrong, and I plan to keep it that way.

The sound of movement nearby catches my attention, and my heart jolts as Clyde gets to his feet. He’s holding a thick wind of rope in his hands, and takes one end of it, looping it through the harness around his waist.

Oh, God, are we about to start the next leg of our trip? Fear sets in a little deeper at the prospect of going higher, and I’m beginning to wish I’d just told them from the start that I don’t like heights.

Billy, Doc, and Jesse also stand up, and I reluctantly do the same. I move as close to the rocky wall as I can and wait for them to secure me to their harness.

Knowing we’ll all be linked helps soothe my frazzled nerves, but it doesn’t calm the fear that’s racing through me.

Clyde comes over to me, and though he can’t see them through my sunglasses, he looks me in the eyes as he carefully loops and securely ties the rope that will bind us together.

His demeanor is calm, but I get the sense of excitement he’s feeling. I don’t know if it’s the promise of adventure, or the risk that’s got him pumped up, and I don’t ask.

“There, all done. You’ll be safe with us,” he says quietly, sliding his hands around my waist as he pulls me in for a kiss, leaving me feeling even more breathless than I was a moment ago.

I wobble slightly on my feet, and I’m grateful for his hands keeping me in place, so I don’t completely lose my balance.

“Thanks,” I reply, smiling faintly up at his handsome face.

I wish I could feel some of the confidence he exudes, but I’m nowhere near as steady as he seems to be.