Page 10

EMBARRASSMENT!

S tunned silence filled the air. Gentlemen and ladies alike who had been quietly talking between themselves openly gaped at the display the young Miss Darcy had just made. The embarrassed couple stood in a quiet and dignified embrace with the entire room waiting for Darcy to say something to his sister. Even the usually verbose and often inappropriate Mrs Bennet was speechless. Shuffling and discomfort filled the air. Other couples turned and moved closer together. Slowly, Georgiana found herself standing on her own.

Lydia was the first to recover. Storming over to Georgiana, she slapped the girl around the face. “You belong in a schoolroom. What’s wrong with your behaviour? Everything ! Aside from publicly embarrassing your brother and my sister, who might I remind you are courting and therefore close to marriage, your behaviour is disgusting. A bit of flirting like Lizzy does with your brother or Kitty does with your cousin is expected. We need to let gentlemen know that we are interested. The brand of flirting I have displayed the past two weeks I am aware borders on indiscrete, but I had a plan for it. Your brand of flirting belongs in the gutter and on street corners! I hope that if the two Fitzwilliams marry my sisters you find yourself confined back to the schoolroom for a time. Even your companion is too soft on you,” Lydia angrily chastised Georgiana.

“How dare you?” Georgiana seethed. “You’re ignorant, vain, and just as guilty of flirting as I am.”

“Of the last part, I confess that I am! Ignorant? No, I am not. I have read not only every single sermon by Rev. Fordyce, but as many books as I could get my hands on through the circulating library on deportment, the behaviour of ladies, etc. including Mary Woolstonecraft’s book. Yes, it is the fashion for us to pretend to be insipid and vain. I also know that our male counterparts despise such women. Every single man in this room would rather have a woman who could be his equal in every way than an insipid, vanity-driven little whore. I also know every piece of current affairs and have other knowledge that you can only dream of. As for vain, I am not the best person to judge my vanity, since pride and vanity tend to go hand in hand and blind us all to our weakness in that regard. So, I will leave it to those who know me best to state the truth or otherwise of my pride and vanity.” Lydia had surprised the room. Her confession of what she knew was more like something they would expect to hear from the bookish Mary, rather than the flighty Lydia. “You, on the other hand, seem eaten up in both. You may have higher connections than I do, but your behaviour is far worse. I would not trade our places for the world. I know that everyone despises me simply for my open manners. You seem unaware that everywhere you go those around you will despise you for your behaviour.”

Georgiana shrugged. “You are wrong!”

“I have tried to tell you. Fitzwilliam has tried, Mrs Annesley tried — even Bingley has tried. Miss Bennet is correct! If you still refuse to believe anyone then I do not know what else we are going to do with you,” Darcy added.

Georgiana stamped her foot. “Then let me live my life and marry whomever I choose.”

Darcy shook his head. “Hopefully, then experience will be a better tutor than we have been.”

Georgiana flounced off to the other side of the room. She knew better than to argue further.

Darcy took a deep breath and turned to his hosts. “I apologise that my sister and I have caused such a scene.”

Lady Lucas was gracious. “Do not disturb yourself. Your sister is young and I do not think there is a single one of us who does not remember being young and impetuous. Enjoy your courtship.”

Darcy bowed to his hostess. However, just then it was time to go through to dinner and Darcy noticed that he was the highest-ranking gentleman in the room, beside his host. He groaned slightly, offering his arm to his hostess and watched as Sir William escorted his sister through to dinner. It would be a long dinner.

The length of the dinner was not the only problem that arose while they dined. While Elizabeth was seated next to Darcy, the dinner conversation left them no opportunity for a personal conversation. Mrs Bennet was seated across from Elizabeth and dominated the conversation with inane chatter, speculating on the marital prospects of every single person in attendance as well as chewing over every piece of gossip that she could think of. Dinner was almost over when Mrs Bennet turned her attention to Darcy and Elizabeth directly. “So, Fitzwilliam, I believe that you and Kitty were discussing a visit to Cambridge’s Anglesey Abbey,” Mrs Bennet announced.

Darcy almost choked as he shifted quickly to cover his shock and discomfort. “I… I’m sorry, I do not remember such a discussion. I have not been to visit Cambridge since my father passed five years ago. It holds no happy memories for me.”

“Then why would you propose such a trip?” Mrs Bennet asked.

“I would not. I think it may have been my cousin who was talking to Kitty about it. The area is beautiful and he was enamoured with the beauty of the Abbey, as well as Newmarket being only thirteen miles from there. He loves to race his horse when he has the chance,” Darcy answered.

“Why would you deny that it is you who proposed the trip?” Mrs Bennet asked.

Darcy took a large drink of wine, as the memories flooded back. He had been just eighteen at the time. His mother had passed away only a year before. He and Wickham had been close back then, though societal expectations were drawing the distinctions more sharply. It had begun so promisingly. An innocent flirtation and the joy of living. That was what they had said. Picnics, horse races, wine, and dancing. Their whole friendship group had been wild and carefree. Darcy had been more open then. Without the responsibilities that would fall on his shoulders just a few short years later, he had assumed that her overt preference for himself had been genuine. He would never forget that day outside the Abbey. A lazy Sunday afternoon they had been enjoying the grounds of the Abbey after attending morning services and picnicking in the gardens. She and Darcy had been watching their friends falling in love and talking about what their futures held. That was when she had dropped into the conversation that she was dowerless. Darcy knew that should have been a warning, but young and reckless he had ignored her warning. Not long afterwards she began asking to borrow small amounts. Whether she ever paid him back, Darcy could neither remember nor care. It was still painful. For two years, he had begun spending larger and larger amounts on her in gifts and outings. She took it all for granted and gave him nothing in return. At the end of the two years, they had attended the wedding of mutual friends. After the wedding, Darcy had given hints of being serious and proposing. She, however, turned nasty. He was and always had been wealthy, but a mere gentleman. While he was someone to pass the time with, she wanted a wealthy man who had a title. A viscount, an earl, or even a duke. He had been tolerated, that had been her word, merely because he had the connections to the peerage and could open those doors for her. It became clear. She had used him. He had been devastated. He began to see the small conniving and manipulative ways that she had used to deceive him. She had taken from him and cruelly crushed him when he had opened himself up and offered everything. He began to see it from other women, too. Until Elizabeth, he had not even looked at another woman without seeing and hearing the events of that day. What would he tell the Bennet matron that she would believe? “Madam, my cousin and I look identical. We have both been here for the past week. However, while he is comfortable in society I am not. I have been at Netherfield trying to educate my sister, while he has enjoyed your society. I would deny proposing the trip, simply because I did not propose it. I did not even know about it unto you mentioned it.”

“Lizzy, Kitty, what did you two think about the idea? It would mean that you would stay in Cambridge overnight at the very least as it is so far away,” Mrs Bennet asked, ignoring what Darcy had told her.

Darcy looked at Elizabeth with pleading eyes, he did not want to return to Cambridge, where his life had turned around.

“I am excited about the prospect, mama,” Kitty declared. “Fitzwilliam has told me so much about how beautiful the Abbey and its grounds are. I wish very much to see it.”

“I think it is a charming idea for the young people,” Lady Lucas agreed. “My John and Charlotte are both wishing to see the Abbey.”

“That Abbey has seen many ordinations and weddings,” Wickham reminisced. “I was ordained there only a week after my father passed away. It would be nice to see the Abbey again.”

“You cannot be spared from your duties,” Colonel Forster snapped. “Nostalgia can only be tolerated in men who have proved themselves trustworthy and to behave with dignity.”

Everyone shifted in their seats, unsure of what to say or how to react.

Wickham bowed his head. “I apologise, sir,” he eventually said. “I am trying to be a better man. Sometimes, I fall back into my old ways.”

“You are not a bad man, Wickham, and you’ll make a fine officer,” Colonel Forster assured him. “Just keep working on improving and you will get there. I suspect that you are already a far better man than you were. From what I’ve heard of your past you certainly have made huge improvements.”

Just then Georgiana snorted. “George needed no improvements. I would have married him – just as he was.”

Lydia gaped at the young girl. “Mr Wickham has told me about the man he was. Why would you not want him to change and become a better man?”

“Because, Lydia, that would expose my sister as needing to change,” Darcy answered. “And Georgiana doesn’t want to do that.”

“Why should I change when I have all I want and need? George liked me just as I am,” Georgiana argued.

“You are sweet and loving, Miss Darcy. However, it was I who told your brother and cousin that your behaviour was out of control. I did so because I hated seeing you throwing yourself at every young man you met. So indiscriminate. I have seen certain kinds of ladies behave with more decorum,” Wickham observed.

“How dare you call me a whore?” Georgiana screeched.

“I didn’t and I wouldn’t dare! Your brother would challenge me to a duel if I did. However, I would seriously ask how you view yourself and why did you assume that I had insulted you in that way?” Wickham held his hand up to stop Georgiana from answering. “Reflect on what I’ve said, don’t answer me.”

Darcy grinned at Elizabeth. If no one else could reach his sister, Wickham just might. He was hopeful.

“Why do I need to reflect? There is nothing wrong with my behaviour,” Georgiana declared.

Nausea washed over Darcy and he laid his cutlery aside. “Lady Lucas, thank you for the invitation and the delicious meal. I apologise for my sister’s behaviour. I beg to take our leave. Georgiana, you are done. We are leaving now — go get your outerwear and meet me at the door.”

“There is no need to leave, surely,” Lady Lucas answered.

“I apologise for the abrupt departure,” Darcy answered. “However, I believe that we must go. I will need to have a serious talk with my sister. Mr Bennet, might I beg your indulgence and request that your daughter, Elizabeth, join us as well? I will need her advice.”

Elizabeth blushed but rose from the table with Darcy.

“An indulgence, indeed. Elizabeth may go, but make sure she gets back to Longbourn safely,” Mr Bennet instructed.