Page 18

I awoke early Friday morning to find Dawson sitting at the kitchen table, notepads spread out around him while he typed away on his laptop.

“Someone’s taking their remote work seriously,” I said as I grabbed a bagel from the fridge and popped it into the toaster.

“That’s because some of us don’t have the day off.”

“Almost makes you wish you were in high school again, doesn’t it?” He glanced up at me with a look that vehemently disagreed. “I’ll take that as no, then.”

“Smart girl.”

“ Very . Now, what’s the plan for the morning?”

“The plan is working the logistics for the parade while going over Agent Franklin’s notes from the arrests and everything leading up to them. I’m trying to see if anything about the Vollero boss was overlooked somehow…maybe find something useful in there.”

I pulled up a seat next to him and plopped down so I could read over his shoulder. His hair was still damp from his morning shower, and the fresh scent of it made me want to lean in closer. When our knees brushed under the table, I quickly scooted back in my seat.

“Do you need some help, or—”

A knock at the front door startled us both. Dawson was on his feet, gun in hand as he edged toward the foyer on silent feet. He leaned in to peek through the peephole, then lowered his weapon. “It’s your mother.”

Shit .

I knew I’d promised Dawson I’d hear her out, and somewhere down deep inside of me, I wanted to. But the second he opened that door and I saw the irritated expression on her face when she found him standing in front of her, all hackles were raised in an instant. Promise or not, I knew this wasn’t about to go well.

“Back already?” I asked as I came to stand next to him.

“We need to talk,” she replied as she pushed past us both, uninvited. “I had a long call with your father last night about you. He told me everything.”

“Oh, are you two still talking? I didn’t think old what’s-his-name would be too keen on that.”

My mother walked over to the kitchen table and looked over the fed’s notes and evidence. Dawson cleared his throat and made his way over to collect his things.

“I’ll take this to your room and work on it, Danners…let you two have this conversation in private, if that’s what you want.”

“Sure.”

He piled his notes and laptop into his arms, then strode down the hall.

The second my bedroom door closed, my mother’s laser focus was on me and me alone. “As I said, your father and I were talking last night, and we decided that—”

“ We ?”

“—nothing good can come of you investigating his case any further.”

“Except his freedom, but let’s be honest, that’s hardly your top priority anymore—if it ever was.”

“Your father’s freedom is all I’ve wanted since he was cuffed and marched through the front door of our home.”

Whatever snide retort was resting on my tongue died the moment her words fully registered. They were in complete contrast with the narrative surrounding her absence, and the dissonance it caused tore right through me. Had she broken mentally? Created a dichotomy for herself to absolve her of guilt and shame? Because how could someone standing before me, avowing ferociously that her husband’s exoneration mattered to her more than anything, be living another life on the west coast?

“Well, Mom, you’ve got a really funny way of showing it.” Her flinch was so subtle that anyone else might have missed it, but not me. And it left me even more confused. “What’s that even supposed to mean?”

“What do you think it means?” she countered, folding her arms across her chest.

“I have no clue, because it sounds like something a supportive wife would say, but a supportive wife wouldn’t be living with her new boyfriend in California, would she?”

“No,” she ground out through gritted teeth, “she wouldn’t.”

“And therein lies my confusion. You wouldn’t want to clear that up for me, would you?” The burning in her eyes told me all I needed to know. “Yeah, I didn’t think so. But maybe you’ll be up for telling me who the douchebag was that caused your pageant scandal? I assume Meg told you I found out about that—”

“Who he is doesn’t matter, Kylene.”

“Are you still in contact with this asshole?”

“I wasn’t for a long time, but then he just kind of popped up in my life again unexpectedly.”

“ Wait ,” I said as I pieced the puzzle of deception together, “it’s Frank, isn’t it? That’s who you up and moved to the west coast for.”

“No—”

“ No ? Then who’s that homewrecker? Who did you drop Dad for like he never even mattered to you?”

“It’s not that simple, Kylene.”

“Oh, it isn’t?” I asked, my acerbic tone so thick with accusation she flinched. “Is that because it was already going on before Dad was even arrested?”

“Of course not—”

“So he wasn’t your little side piece? Was he the reason for all your missed dinners and weekend meetings?”

“No—”

“He’s not Mister ‘I’m Working Late Tonight’?”

“Kylene—”

“Because it can’t be that complicated if you weren’t having an affair before everything went to shit, Mom. ”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” she seethed.

“I know you turned your back on your child and husband so you could run off to California—”

“I had to!” she screamed as her composure crumbled under the weight of my judgment. The pain in her eyes was plain, but it didn’t change anything.

“You had to? Ooooh, well, that explains it all. I didn’t realize you were required to bail on us so you could go fuck your boyfriend who you definitely weren’t having an affair with before. Apparently that’s a pattern for you, though, isn’t it? Abandoning everyone close to you for any random dickhead who pays you some attention? Hopefully this one doesn't knock you up—”

The sharp snap of her palm biting into my cheek seemed to echo through the room forever.

I never even saw it coming.

Her eyes went wide with instant regret, but the damage was already done; there would be no taking it back. As if that truth had played out in my expression, she straightened her back and doubled down. But the tears in her eyes belied her bravado. “I love your father in a way I can only hope you understand one day—and I love you just as much.”

I wiped my lip with the back of my hand to see if she’d drawn blood as a mirthless laugh escaped. “Well, you sure have a shitty way of showing it.” At that moment, Dawson rushed inside and quickly read the room. The second his eyes fell upon my reddened cheek, they narrowed with anger, but this wasn’t his showdown. It was mine. “I think we’re done here.”

With all the stubbornness I possessed, she stood her ground, a million thoughts and responses apparent in the set of her tight features as she stared back. “When all of this is over, I’ll tell you everything. Until then, I need you to trust that I did it all for you.” She turned to walk away, but hesitated at the doorway, hand gripping the knob far tighter than necessary. “Just like your father.”

With that final blow, she walked out the door, leaving me with my reeling thoughts and Dawson’s eerie silence.

Just like your father… The possible meanings of her parting words ran circles in my mind while I tried to catch one long enough to make sense of it. Like, my father did what he did for me, or was she saying that he trusted her actions? Because I couldn’t even begin to rationalize why he’d sanction her running off with some guy—especially when I refused to go with her. No way. Not even in an alternate universe.

But the sting in my cheek cautioned my arrogance. Never in my life had my mother ever hit me. I’d pushed her too far that time, and I couldn’t help but wonder why. Dawson was right; there was something buried amid all the ambiguities and denials that I didn’t understand yet, but I wasn’t ready to put aside my hurt and anger to find it.

I was still staring at the door when Dawson cautiously walked over and pulled my hand away from my cheek. I hadn’t even realized I was still holding it.

“What happened?”

I opened my mouth to answer, but nothing would come out. Instead, I pulled free of his grasp and ran down the hall to my room. Locking the door wouldn’t keep him out forever, but I did it anyway, then threw myself onto the bed and buried my face in the pillow as the anger I’d felt since my mother abandoned me gave way to the piercing sadness her absence had created. I sobbed and screamed until my eyes burned, my throat ached, and exhaustion wracked my body. And when it was all over, I sat up to find Dawson standing in the doorway, watching over me like the guardian he was.

“You want to talk about it?” I shook my head. He pushed off the doorframe and walked over to the bed. The mattress sank under his weight as he sat down next to me. “Want me to hunt her down and arrest her?” The hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth somehow managed to make mine do the same.

“I’d settle for a hug,” I said with a sniffle.

He sucked a breath between his teeth. “I’m afraid that’s not very professional, Miss Danners.”

At that, I laughed. “Fine. I’ll settle for a firm handshake, then.”

I reached my hand toward him and his engulfed it, shaking it gently before he used it to pull me against him and wrap his arms around me. He didn’t say anything; he just sat there and held me while I fought off another round of tears. The soothing stroke of his hand through my hair lulled me into a state of calm that felt so foreign it should have been unnerving.

But in that moment, there was no place I’d rather have been.

* * *

Luckily for me, my mom hadn’t been taught to throw down like I had growing up, so I wasn’t sporting a bruised lip or black eye—which meant I didn’t have to explain to my friends why I looked like I’d been jumped while Tabby did my makeup for the parade. Mark had driven her over with dinner so we could have a little getting-ready party before the big night, and Garrett was there with bells on. Even Maribel made an appearance at the impromptu get-together, sporting her cheerleading outfit she’d be wearing in the parade later.

Dawson was in and out all evening, on the phone with Agent Wilson and the sheriff about the details for the night. Two feds had been sent down to help secure the route, along with half the sheriff’s department. Apparently, the logistics were taking forever to iron out.

I tried not to let my apprehension line my face, mainly because the ginger got mad every time I unconsciously frowned. “Would you stop doing that?” She bopped me on the nose with the soft end of a makeup brush to get my attention.

“Sorry!”

“You’re gonna crease my contouring, and I am NOT starting again. There’s no time for that.”

“So, absolutely no facial expressions allowed. Got it.”

She scowled at me, then continued her work while Maribel giggled next to her.

“Are you girls almost done?” Mark yelled from the living room. “We wanna see the fairy princess!”

“She’s a queen !” Tabby shouted back at him in an exhausted tone. “And yes, we’re almost done.”

“I need to head out,” Maribel said before heading toward the door, “but if you want me to deal with them on the way, I’d be happy to.” She smiled over her shoulder at me. “You look beautiful, Kylene.”

She disappeared down the hall, and I heard Mark making dramatic kissing noises before an “OUCH” echoed back toward my room, accompanied by Garrett’s laughter and the closing of the front door.

“If you two are done being children, could you tell me where Dawson is? We have to leave in like ten.”

“He’s still outside talking to Dad. I can see him pacing the front yard…” The way Garrett’s voice trailed off did nothing for my fraying nerves.

“That’s right,” Tabby said, eyes wide with glee as she leaned in closer to test the glue on my lashes. “He never got to see you last time, did he? At either pageant, really…”

“Nope, just the grizzled aftermath of the second, which consisted of my dress in tatters, a crinoline as outerwear, and a strapless bra working overtime to keep me from flashing him.”

“Well, you looked amazing before, and you’re going to look amazing tonight. I’m sure Dawson will agree.”

“I didn’t exactly do all this for him, Tabs,” I said, that strange fluttering in my stomach coming alive yet again.

“And yet he’ll love it all the same.” She looked at me for a moment, a thousand things passing silently between us. “You deserve to be happy, Ky. You know that, right?”

“Yeah…what I don’t know is why you’re bringing that up instead of finishing my face so we can go.”

She propped her hands on her hips and stared at me like I'd just taken leave of all five of my senses. “Yes, you do. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine, but don’t pretend that I can’t see it…see how you feel about him.”

“About who? Dawson ? Tabby, I think—”

She held up her palm, shutting down whatever rebuttal I was about to ramble off, and just looked at me with a tear forming in the corner of her eye. “You deserve to be happy. That’s all I’m going to say.”

While the weight of her statement pressed down on my chest, she dusted some powder over my face while she beamed from ear to ear. “Almost done…just a little more highlighter, annnnnnd finished!”

She threw her arms up in triumph, then handed me a mirror to admire her work. My face shone and sparkled like a demure snowflake. It was utter Winter Festival perfection.

“Tabby…this is amazing!”

“We wanna see it,” Mark called out in mock irritation. As if his demand needed to be met that second, Tabby pulled me to my feet and gathered up the yards of expensive fabric so I could wrestle my way into that monster of a dress. I’d thought the last one was big, but Lavonia from Bella’s had gone all-out this time. The dark teal color contrasted my pale skin beautifully and matched my eyes. The deep sweetheart neckline wasn’t one I’d have chosen, but once on, even I had to admit it was flattering. What it wasn’t, however, was warm, with all that exposed skin. The lower half of the dress had fabric for days. The top did not.

I stood in front of my cheap full-length mirror and admired how the dress cinched my waist and billowed out from there in true ball-gown style.

“Lavonia gave us this, too,” Tabby said, bringing a satin jacket of sorts over. “It should help keep you warm… ish .”

“Heavy on the ish , methinks.” I folded the jacket over my arm while Tabby looped a borrowed crystal necklace around my neck.

“It sparkles like snow!” she said with childlike glee as I turned toward her. “So beautiful…”

“Ladies, you can’t keep us waiting forever!” Mark shouted from the living room.

“Yes, they can,” Garrett countered with the wisdom of a man who had experience in that department.

“Get your asses out here.”

“I guess I shouldn’t keep my subjects waiting forever,” I said with a smile.

Tabby gathered my skirt behind me so it wouldn’t snag on anything in my tiny room, then escorted me into the hallway where she fluffed it to perfection. Tears filled her eyes, and I was terrified if she said something emotional, I'd fall apart. “Mark, come get your girl. She’s about to start crying again.”

“I can’t help it,” she said, turning to Mark as he approached.

He pulled her into his side as he looked me over. “Well, damn, Danners…”

“Are you going to let her come out here, or do I need to cram into the hallway too?” Garrett’s irritation was noted, and the dating duo led the way into the living room. As soon as they parted, he was on his feet. “Aw, Ky—”

“Nope!” I said, warding him off. “No mushy sentiments. No tears. Queen’s orders.”

“How about hugs?” he asked. “Does she take those?”

“Do not smoosh her!” Tabby yelled as he reached for me.

Her words did nothing to deter him. Instead, he wrapped his arms around me carefully and held me tightly. “If I did blondes, you’d be the only one for me. You know that, right?”

“I do. Now release me at once before you make a mess of me and Tabby has to kill you.” He shot her a look, and the sweet, always-apologizing Canadian slid her index finger along her throat in a threatening manner. “I’ve rubbed off on her enough to know she’s not bluffing.”

“I see that.”

He stepped back enough for me to take stock of the notable absence in the room. “Is Dawson still outside?”

“Yep. He’s still on the phone.”

A gnawing sensation immediately began in my belly, but before I could spiral too far, the front door swung open. Dawson stepped inside, wearing a navy tailored suit that fit him like a glove and an easy expression that sent a sigh of relief past my lips. But that ease disappeared the second his warm hazel eyes fell on me. He stopped dead in his tracks and stared at me while everyone in the room looked on.

His mouth opened to speak, then shut as his hand flexed at his side. “You ready to go, Danners?”

“Um, yeah…I just need to find my gloves.”

“Here,” Tabby said, handing the thin black gloves to me. “Have fun, you two! We’ll see you by the grandstand!”

The boys muttered their goodbyes as I walked over to Dawson, who opened the door for me. “I’ll see you guys there.”

I stepped out onto the porch and eyeballed the steps. My visual radius of the ground was minimal at best, thanks to my massive dress, and I wondered how in the hell I was going to get down those little ankle snipers without taking a digger.

“I know how much you hate asking for help,” Dawson said as he took my hand, “but for both our sakes, I suggest you let me.”

Without argument, I let him usher me down the steps and all the way to the car for good measure; he even opened the door for me and helped fold my dress in so I could actually sit. Once I was tucked in and belted for safety, he shut the door and walked around to the driver’s side. He climbed into the seat, shut the door, then sat there for a moment before turning on the engine.

“What?” I asked, my nerves rising again as I thought about his lengthy phone call with the sheriff. “What happened? Did you get bad news from Wilson?”

“No.”

“From Sheriff Higgins?”

“No.”

Silence.

“Then what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

I would have found that more convincing if he’d looked at me when he said it.

“I’d believe that if you weren’t being all weird.” He dared a sideward glance at me and the pile of fabric in my lap, and self-doubt impaled me. “It’s the dress, isn’t it? I look totally ridiculous in it. Dammit! Tabby did seem a bit too enthusiastic about it—”

“Danners—”

“I’m going to strangle the lot of them when this is over—”

“ Danners —”

“I can’t believe they’d lie about something so—”

“Kylene! Would you shut up for a minute?” His shout shocked me into silence. “You don’t look ridiculous in the dress.” He took a moment, then turned to me, those piercing eyes nearly boring a hole right through me. “You look stunning in it. Truly stunning…I just didn’t know how to tell you that. That’s why I wasn’t saying anything. Nothing’s wrong.”

“ Oh ,” I said sheepishly as I looked away. “Thanks.”

His heavy gaze still fell upon me, and something deep inside me warmed. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yep. All set.” He turned over the engine and pulled out into the night. “So, everything went fine on your call?”

“Agent Wilson just wanted to go over the details of the parade one last time to make sure we had all our bases covered.”

“And was he satisfied?”

“He was. Sheriff Higgins will have men positioned throughout the route, and two federal agents will be stationed to blend in with the crowd.”

“It’s likely all for nothing,” I said as we headed into town.

“Likely, but not definitely. If I had my way, you’d be wearing a kevlar vest over that dress.”

“Maybe under,” I said with a laugh. “It would kill the overall look, though, don’t you think?”

“Better than you getting killed,” was his only response before silence fell upon us and the weight of his words settled on my mind. We weren’t playing a game of chess with a madman anymore; we were playing chicken. Sooner or later, someone had to give.

I shrunk down into my seat and clutched my satin jacket to my chest, suddenly wishing it was as bulletproof as I’d thought our plan was.

A buzzing cut through the silence, and Dawson fished his phone out of his pocket. “This is Dawson,” he said as we rolled up to a red light. “When? Are you going there now?” Silence. “You’re sure?” I tugged on his arm and mouthed ‘what’s going on,’ but he waved me off as he listened intently. “Okay…let me know what you find at the scene.”

Dawson hung up and tossed his phone into the center console as the light turned green. But he didn’t pull away. Instead, he turned and looked me straight in the eyes. “That was Dean. They just found Sal Bellucci in a tiny apartment in downtown Hoboken— dead .”