Page 35 of Broken Shadows (Corrupt Shadows Duet #2)

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Lorcan

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

My eyes flare open only to be greeted with inky, swirling darkness. Panic squeezes my lungs as I scramble backward on my hands and feet.

This can't be fucking happening.

No.

No, no, no, no!

Pain arrows through my back and slices through my brain matter, the smell of freshly seared flesh jamming up my nostrils.

This cannot be real. I refuse to accept any other outcome.

I struggle to my knees, slapping my palms over my ears as I dig my fingertips into the sides of my head.

It’s okay, Lorcan. You'll get through this. It's just a dream. You'll wake up with Evie in your arms. Breathe, just fucking breathe…

But is it really a dream?—Panic swallows all rationality.

This is fucking real. I don’t know how I know the horrifying truth, but I do.

Emptiness reigns.

Emptiness reigns.

Emptiness reigns.

The thought bounces against the inside of my skull with spikes as sharp and damaging as a mace.

A shiver pebbles my naked skin as a memory ripples across my mind’s eye.

Samuel's face as he laughed and threw me in here, a wide, unhinged smile plastered across his face. He wouldn’t stop and fucking listen to me.

Fuck.

This isn’t a dream.

I never wanted Evangeline, or the fucking throne for that matter, but now it’s clear that his reasons for helping Evangeline have nothing to do with taking the crown for himself. No, it's all about his sick and beyond toxic obsession with Evangeline.

I'm not sure if the witch fabricated his feelings for her or if he genuinely wants her enough to destroy our family. Perhaps I would feel less devastation if that were the case, but I fucking doubt it. Samuel and I never saw eye to eye, even as adolescents. He could not resolve himself to the fact that he would always be the second-born son.

I used to blame his behavior on the fact that he’s Envy, but he's so far gone now that my madness wants absolutely nothing to do with his.

When I found Evie, the utter desolate hopelessness that was my constant companion diminished, then disappeared altogether. But there is no denying that the speed at which it returns fucking guts me.

I try to get my thoughts away from this dangerous path, but I can’t. I’m too godsdamn weak.

The bars of my cage leached every drop of magic from my bones, my shadows and demon powers completely evaporating.

The cold, damp stones rush to meet my back as I give into gravity.

Absolutely cracked and disturbed laughter looses from my throat as I recognize why one of the many reasons this stint in my cage feels so very different.

I no longer fight with my madness.

In the past, I fought against it as it worked to draw my present mind into my subconscious, eviscerating me forever. To lock me in a cage of its own making and bury it beneath the black sands of my most morbid thoughts and dreams.

But now I know the bitter truth—it wanted to protect me. We’ve come to an understanding and everything about it feels different… as if it actually is a positive response to the trauma I’ve endured.

It's still always present, even in my non-waking hours. However, I don't bear any bitterness towards it or resent its existence. I welcome the blurred, dark oblivion it offers, and willingly sink beneath the sand, no metaphorical cage necessary.

I float here deep under miles of sand manifested by my subconscious, oblivious to my real surroundings even though they claw, and claw, and fucking claw at my psyche, just waiting for the opportunity to slice through it and erase me once and for all.

An emotion that I don’t have the energy to decipher swarms like an absolutely pissed off hive of killer Hell-bees. Their black and purple bodies fight for the chance to stab my organs with their jagged toxic barbs, clashing their wings, gnashing their fangs, and decorating my insides with rich violet blood.

I don't fight them.

I lie there, letting the obsidian sand cover my open eyes and worm its way into my ears and mouth. It’s almost peaceful here in this numb existence.

An intrusive thought gouges its way into my mind. Evie. Is she safe? If anything has happened to her, this is the fate I deserve. Perhaps, the one that I have always deserved.

Yes, drowning in sorrow is absofuckinglutely fitting. I welcome the sand pouring into me and filling my body cavity. Pain, desirous raw pain lacerates my guts as the soft, soothing sand transforms into millions of sharp, forgotten puzzle pieces, cutting me open with endless paper cut like lacerations from the inside out.

My mouth opens as I laugh, gagging on the sand that’s swiftly clogging my esophagus.

Not too long ago, I thought of Evie as such a puzzle piece, minus the blade-like edges, but perhaps, that’s what was missing all along.

Our jagged, sharp, and blood-stained pieces haven’t been forced together. No, my little witch’s edges carved into mine until she nestled inside my fucking soul, the wounds she inflicted healing and sealing us together for eternity.

I inhale and greedily consume the sand deep into the membranes of my lungs.

How can I protect her when it was so easy for them to toss me away, to lock me in this cage, to be forgotten amongst the memories caked into the bowels of the castle?

I twist and writhe further into the blade-like puzzle pieces, encouraging their honed edges to slice into the outside of my skin as well.

This feels… right.

I gasp and cough as the safety of my madness’ hold fades, and scorching agony burns across my chest and thighs where they press against my cage. Any magic that has trickled into me during my spell of delirium seeps from me like it's my life's blood.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

***

My body doesn't bother reacting to the chilling breeze whispering over my naked skin, the source of its creation unknown, just like the motherfucking drips.

I sigh and squeeze my eyes shut as a thought whispers into my mind. I miss my fucking blanket, a constant over the centuries of my initial captivity. Holy and threadbare as it was, at least it was something tangible I could cling to when the manic thoughts overwhelmed me. I looked for it when Samuel and Evangeline shoved me in here but only received bruised knees and burn blistered fingers for my efforts.

While I’m aware it’s fucking pathetic, the King of Demons longing for a godsdamn scrap of fabric, I can’t be bothered to give a shit.

The ridiculous, binding notion of time holds no sway over me as my mind drifts among the black sands. Perhaps I’ve dwelled in this expansive, inky void for weeks, or it might only be mere hours. But one truth remains—If I think about how long I’ve been captive this time, I risk losing myself… permanently.

I hiss and the corners of my cracked, blood caked lips score upward into my taut cheeks as I absorb the euphoric agony my cage inflicts.

Crack.

Crack.

Crack.

I rock back and forth into the bars, slamming the back of my skull against my cage as hard as I can with every backward tilt. And yet, it does nothing to dim the acidic taste at the back of my throat or the twist of the bleeding organ in my chest as it’s rung dry.

Sizzling flesh drags against my eardrums as pain crumbles a fraction of my utterly desolate and useless thought loops.

Thoughts of my witch swim to the forefront of my mind and a raw, tortured scream eviscerates my throat, stealing my breath. It’s the same every fucking time I accept the inevitable and conjure Evie. I trace her features with wisps of memory, unrepenting yearning swallowing my senses and replacing the throbbing bliss I built rocking into the bars.

This pain?

This soul shredding ache?

Is not one I fucking relish.

I despise it.

When I wrote that letter to Evie and told her she was my eternity, I fucking meant it.

I don't exist without her.

No reason to put in the effort required to live.

Royal demons cannot die, not in the normal sense of the word, but we can fade—Our physical bodies remaining in a stasis, but our minds blank and wholly silent.

Shivers cascade over my body, the frigid floor simultaneously bleeding into my bones and extracting any warmth the trembling has created.

I'm too fucking weak to do anything but lie here… a pathetic, useless heap of a demon.

Pain pulses through my temples as my madness perks up and claws into my brain matter.

If you give in to this feeling and submit to oblivion too soon, all the suffering, both now and in the past will have been for nothing .

My heart hardens into stone. If anyone deigns to inform me that Evie no longer exists on the same plane as myself, I will find a way to end it, but only after I have wrought the maximum amount of destruction possible in her name.

My vow echoes inside my mind and lodges between my ribs, etching itself onto the bone.

I swallow thickly, my throat sticking together with the fresh blood seeping through the parched, cracked membranes lining it, then get on my hands and knees and crawl away from my beloved source of pain.

I need to regain all the power that I can while also weakening the wards of my fucking cage. I battle against the persistent craving to harm myself further, then lock my arms around my knees, refusing to give in.

But I acknowledge the necessary evil of grace and allow myself a moment to break, to split open at the seams and pour my blackened misery into the world.

Just.

This.

Once.

I plunge into thoughts of my baby girl, letting everything I hold at bay just to survive, crash over and into me. Memory after memory crash like an angry sea onto the shores of my mind's eye. My vision clouds with wetness, then spills unhindered onto my cheeks. My tongue darts out and catches the last bit of moisture my body possesses as every insufferable emotion trickles down my cheeks as tears.

It's then that I realize music plays along with my thoughts of Evie. I hug my knees tighter to my chest. Not just any music, the playlist I poured every fucking drop of my essence into for her. However, as my voice reverberates around me, I realize the music plays not only in my head.

My voice distorted, raw, and broken, sings along weakly with every fucking song, and for a few precious minutes, drowning out that fucking dripping.

I close my eyes and lay my cheek against my knee, hugging myself tightly, even though I know it will do nothing to keep me in one piece.

My vocal cords burn as I sing through the anguish of my dry, bloody throat. I comfort myself in the only way I know how, other than through pain or Evie’s touch.

I open my eyes and blink into the absolute well of darkness surrounding me as I sing my way through The Dark of You by Breaking Benjamin.

Tears are falling harder and I shudder, dropping my control and letting go of everything I've ever felt.

My voice quiets before I stand on quaking legs.

I will do this for my little witch. If Samuel or Evangeline ever deigns to grant me their presence, I’ll be ready and fucking waiting.

Time slips by again, unnoticed. My legs no longer shake, but perhaps that is because I cannot feel them.

My stomach launches into my throat as my surroundings drastically alter.

I squint through the darkness and turn toward the faintest spark of lavender. The flickering grows, seeming to draw closer. My eyes burn, unaccustomed to absorbing light after so long forgotten in inky black.

I force my eyelids to stay open, less I blink and the darkness consumes everything once more.

My hands ball into a fist by my sides as my eyelids tremble with the effort to hold their open position, then the slightest scrape of something shuffling against stone annihilates the silence of my solitude.

The lavender light burst into an actual fame as someone rounds what I can now see is a concealed, tightly curved stone staircase. I blink and the bearer of said light source comes into focus, clutching a torch. The hairs on the back of my neck straighten as my mind deciphers our new reality. Then a simmering growl rumbles deep in my chest as Evangeline flounces down the stairs.

My skin tightens. There’s another signature close by, but it remains out of sight, higher on the stairs. Samuel, perhaps? I almost call the cunt out on it, but something tells me—urges me—to keep the information to myself.

I bare my teeth as she steps onto the stone floor holding before my cage.

“Don't stop singing on my account, Love. You have such a sexy voice, even if it’s rough right now,” Evangeline coos as she licks her lips and skims my naked body with her disgusting gaze.

I don't respond, just glare at her with unblinking eyes, absolutely resolute and determined to follow my plan to its conclusion.

She tsks. “What, not even a hello after all we've been through over the years?”

I clear my throat. “My most sincere apology. My memory is spotty right now due to the less than appealing environment.” The tone lining my words is hard, but the obsequious nature of my words smooth her ruffled disposition.

Eva laughs and throws a hand against her chest. “Oh, come now. I know you remember. How could you possibly have forgotten me ?”

I focus on my breathing, working to keep it steady and even. Her gaze hardens and the edge of her upper lip twitches as her true self oozes to the surface.

Good, now we can have a proper conversation.

Eva scoffs.

A flush blotches her skin like welts and her pupils dilate. I desperately want to look away as the gorge rises to the back of my throat.

You can do this, Lorcan. Swallow it down, then launch the attack.

I tap my chin with a forefinger. “You know, now that you mention it, I do recall something.” I sigh and shake my head. “Unfortunately, the details are still rather fuzzy. Remind me, won't you, Evangeline?” I intentionally let her name slip and her pulse quickens in response.

She steps closer to the bars and my hands twitch with the need to strangle the fucking life out of her.

The faintest flicker of shadows warms behind my ribs.

Soon.

Almost time.

Just a bit closer.

It’s not enough. I need her to fucking break.

I ignore the nausea swirling in my stomach. I cannot let it distract me.

Blood races to my cock as I remember the ecstasy soaring through my body as Evie dominated me.

I quickly halt the rest of the memory from replaying as Evangeline moans and stares hungrily at my now fully erect cock. My skin recoils as if trying to crawl off its skeletal home.

Her expression sours and she hisses, “If you really want me to tell you, remove those disgusting piercings.

I hold her unflinching stare, then shrug, forcing the corner of my mouth to curl. “I would if I could have Eva, you know that. Alas, they’re magically pierced, and therefore only the owner of the magic used to place them can remove the jewelry.

She scoffs and stomps a slippered foot. “That explains why every attempt to remove them while you were passed out failed.” The bridge of her nose wrinkles. “All you did was bleed and groan. I even made Samuel try, but he was less than enthused about the task.”

Revulsion slithers over every inch of my body.

She.

Fucking.

Touched.

Me.

Wrath consumes by body, consuming my veins with sharp, frozen spikes, poking holes into them as they expand and blood leaks into the black cavity of my essence.

Eva inches forward, ugly red blotches coloring her cheeks. I open my mouth to speak, then close it as a signature I’d know even in death sends my heart into cartwheels.

What the fuck is Evie doing here?

Thank fucking Satan and Hellfire, she’s alive.

Her essence lingers nearby, but I cannot determine her location. My magic is still too weak to use.

Shoving thoughts of my witch from my mind, I refocus on the evil bitch before me.

An unapproved growl scrapes from my throat and Eva bites her lip. “I have always loved it when you purr for me, Love.”

My nostrils flare, but I harness the emotion before she can pick up on it. “Tell me, Eva, what is your favorite memory of us?”

Her mouth parts slightly and lust consumes her stare. “It was the time I used the shackles. Do you remember?”

“Not yet, keep going.”

“I had Samuel move you to the bed while you were unconscious from my earlier dose of potion, then secure your arms and legs with magically enhanced shackles. But I knew that wouldn't be enough, so I secured you further with the screws.” She flutters her eyelashes like she intends to flirt with me. “Does that help?”

I shrug noncommittally, then lower my voice to a sultry caress. “Tell me more.”

Eva giggles and I almost vomit. “Your brother held me as we waited for you to awaken.” Her eyes widen so far it would be comical if not for the present circumstances. “Please, you have to believe me. I didn't a-and I still don't want Samuel. It's always been you. Everything I've done has been for you, Love.”

I cannot describe the utter revulsion and level of loathing I have for this despicable creature.

“So, it was then that I finally took action. I used your brother to show you just how much I love you and make you see you love me too. I sent him away as I formulated a plan.” She sighs wistfully, then winks. “And, I might have touched every inch of your skin while I did so.”

A shudder ripples over my skin, then I straighten my spine.

No.

I fucking refuse to allow her the power to finally ruin me. I curl a wisp of shadows in my palm, ready to strike.