Page 126 of Broken Dream

I feel a sting in my gut. But there’s another feeling, one I can’t quite place. Is it…wariness?

Another knock on my door, louder this time. “Dr. Lansing! Please open the door.”

“Be there in a minute,” I say.

Probably some student trying to get extra office hours, despite the fact that mine are by appointment only. I return to the note.

Losing her shattered me in ways I can’t put into words. I’ve tried to be strong—for you, for us—but the pain is relentless, and I can’t see a way forward.

* * *

Please know this isn’t your fault. You gave me everything, but I’ve lost myself in the void she left behind. I hope you find peace someday, even if I couldn’t.

I squint at the note. Something is wrong here. Lindsay did blame me. She could never say it out loud, but I could tell every moment of the rest of her short life that she harbored resentment toward me for the death of our daughter.

I’ll love you forever. See you on the other side, babe.

* * *

Lindsay

Three more sharp knocks. “Open the door now, Dr. Lansing.”

I whip my head back to the door. “Christ! I’ll be there in a second. I’m…changing.”

“You have thirty seconds, or I’ll knock the door down.”

Knock the door down? Definitely not a student, then. Maybe it’s Peter. He probably heard about how my meeting with Dr. Steel went, and he’s concerned I’ve gone off the deep end.

“I’m fine. I’ll be out in a sec.”

I look back at the letter, read over it again. Once, twice, three times.

And an anvil drops in my gut as I realize…

This isn’t my wife’s handwriting.

Chapter Forty-One

Angie

It’s been an hour since Jason came to my house, and I’ve been sitting on the floor on the other side of my front door, thinking about what to do. I should get to campus, but I can’t get myself to move.

He wants me to go away with him. To Switzerland. For God knows how long. Long enough for me to have to take a semester off school.

Aunt Melanie will disapprove, that’s for sure.

My whole family will.

But Jason’s right about one thing. I can come back. It’s not like I’m moving to Switzerland.

But…we haven’t even been on a date. All we’ve done is sleep together.

I laugh at that. There was no sleeping involved. And we’ve only done it in a bed once.

I rub at my forehead. Tillie scampers up to me and gives me a kiss on the cheek.

“Thanks, girl,” I say to her.