Page 27

I narrow my gaze. “Don’t worry. If you meant anything, I’m certain you’d make it clear.”

A cloud settles over her eyes. “Gannon, can we talk for a minute?”

“No. No, we can’t.”

“ Please . We left things so badly.”

“Ten years ago, Tatum. None of that matters anymore.”

I need to get the hell out of here.

I never should have agreed to come.

“No, it doesn’t matter anymore,” she says. “We’ve both moved on.”

She stands tall and beautiful—as regal and put-together as ever. A giant diamond sits on her ring finger on her left hand, and she wears a gold pin near her collar, which suggests she’s a current member of the parent-teacher association. She clearly leads a full life. She’s definitely moved on.

Good for fucking her.

“I’m happy for you,” I say, the words in stark contrast to my terse tone. “Now, if you’ll excuse me …”

“I said a lot of things to you back then that still haunt me,” Tatum says quickly. “I regret it more than you’ll ever know.”

What? Confused, yet curious, I pause.

“There have been many days when I’ve almost picked up the phone to call you to apologize,” she says.

“Then I think about how it’s been ten years and how ridiculous it would be to call you out of the blue, so I don’t.

But I think back to that time in my life, and I’m genuinely embarrassed by my actions.

I just want you to know that.” She smiles sadly. “You deserve to know that.”

My head spins at her admission and, mostly, her apology. I’ve imagined this scenario for years, but it never came with an apology.

“I was a horrible person, Gannon. I used you and took advantage of your love. And when it didn’t work out in my favor, I did everything that I could to hurt you.” She laughs as if she’s fighting tears. “Who does that sort of thing?”

I blow out a breath, trying to wrap my head around what she’s saying. It’s wild and almost unbelievable. But, at the same time, it’s validating. It’s a fucking relief .

I’m not crazy.

“You know, I have two children. A little boy and a little girl,” she says. “And when I think about a woman doing to my son what I did to you, or imagining my daughter being so poisonous to have the capability to do those things to a man … it’s hard to breathe sometimes.”

“Tatum,” I say, but the word fades into the air.

Think, Brewer.

“No, Gannon. You don’t have to say anything. I’m not here to put you on the spot or force you to forgive me. I just want you to know that I’m truly sorry for trapping you into a marriage you probably didn’t want and for making your life hell.”

Fuck .

It would be so easy to walk away and let her carry all the blame for our fucked-up past. But the truth is that our failure wasn’t only on her.

I had a part in it, too. And although I don’t want to be having this conversation, and I don’t need her apology or think she particularly deserves mine … Carys does.

Carys deserves for me to put this whole Tatum thing to bed because if I don’t, I’ll never figure out how to move forward with her. And that’s what matters. She matters.

She’s all that matters.

My heart slams against my rib cage as my brain goes a million miles per hour. Pieces of my past, present, and future snap into place. Suddenly, the picture is clear.

I had to come tonight for this moment to happen, for this realization to occur. I had to look into Tatum’s eyes and realize I never loved her . What I felt for Tatum wasn’t love—it was an obligation. And I used that to try to prove to the world, to myself, that I wasn’t my father.

That’s where I fucked up. That was unfair to Tatum. I was in such a hurry to be everything he wasn’t—a great husband, the best dad, a good man—that I turned out to be none of those things.

I became more like Reid Brewer than ever before. Bitter. Angry. Cold.

“I never should’ve married you,” I say, relief sweeping through me. “I put a lot of pressure on you, on us, to heal a wound that neither of us created. And it only made it worse.”

“Maybe it did make it worse. But you wouldn’t have been in that situation if I hadn’t told you I was pregnant.”

My brows pull together, and my throat tightens again. “Were you pregnant?”

It’s the one question I’ve never known the answer to and one I’ve never asked. Both answers are unfortunate, and both options are painful. But I need to know. I need to know so I can try to let this go.

“I don’t think so,” she says sadly. “It all happened so fast. I took a test, and it was positive. And I saw it as an answer to a lot of my problems.”

“And then I proposed …”

“And then we got married without telling anyone.” Tears fill her eyes.

“You started building the house and doting on me, and I couldn’t tell you that the doctor couldn’t find a heartbeat.

I was embarrassed but also terrified—and angry.

My God, I was angry . I knew you probably didn’t love me because I wasn’t very lovable.

I was horrible, really. And losing this baby, whether it ever existed or not, was going to make me lose it all. ”

I’m stunned into silence. I can only stare at her and remind myself this is happening. All of my fears and suspicions—they were all true. Every last one of them.

“It was so much easier blaming you and beating you down rather than being a decent human being,” she says, her eyes shining.

“You are nothing like your father. You never were. And if we did have a child together, I know you would’ve been the best father.

” She touches my arm again. “I knew that was your weak spot, and I hit you there repeatedly. I’m really, truly sorry, Gannon. ”

I set our drinks down and take a deep, shaky breath.

“You know, I said and did some things that I’m not proud of, too,” I say. “You deserved more from me, whether you were really pregnant or not. That’s no excuse. I should’ve shown up differently for you. I apologize, Tatum. Truly.”

“Apology accepted.” Tears fill her eyes as she laughs back a sob. “It’s funny how things work out, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess it is.”

“My husband is the best thing to ever happen to me—no offense.”

I chuckle. “No offense taken.”

“He helped me grow up and become the woman I am today,” she says.

“I can’t imagine my life any differently, but I also can’t imagine it being how it is without going through all the things before.

” She grins. “And that woman with you tonight? I’ve never seen you look this happy, Gannon.

And I saw the way she looks at you. I’ll go home tonight knowing you wound up exactly where you should be.

Although I caused you a lot of grief, I’d like to think that maybe it helped you get there …

even if it was just showing you how bad it could be. ”

Her laughter joins mine, and maybe for the first time ever, Tatum and I share a smile without any emotions, good or bad, associated with it.

“I’ll let you get back to your night. Thank you for hearing me out, and I hope you have a great life,” she says earnestly. “I’m so happy we ran into each other.”

“I wish you the best, Tatum.”

She places a quick kiss to my cheek before turning away. I reach for our drinks when Carys snatches my gaze out of the air. She’s standing a few feet away. Her eyes are wide, but she recovers quickly. Too quickly.

Shit.

She turns back toward the table, and I make a beeline toward her, my heart racing.

I can imagine what that might’ve looked like—me standing in a dark corner with another woman, having a very intense conversation that winds up with her kissing my cheek.

Tatum is no Carys, but she’s not hard to look at.

And Carys has known something was bothering me all night.

God, don’t let her think that was anything more than it was.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please turn your attention to the stage. We’d like to welcome tonight’s keynote speaker, Mr. Gannon Brewer.”

Applause breaks out across the room. Carys takes her seat at our table, her features smoothed over. She gives me what appears to be a sweet smile, but I see through it. I see her questions. I see her vulnerability.

I’m torn between going to her and explaining or getting this fucking speech over so we can leave.

“Mr. Brewer?” The emcee repeats my name. “Can you come to the front, please?”

I grit my teeth and head to the front of the room to give the fastest, least impassioned speech of my life so I can give the most thorough, passionate explanation I’ve ever given.

God help me.