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twenty-five

Fafnir

My heart pounds at the right cadence for the first time in days, my mind… whole. Where no others had come back, I did, for her alone. She needed me in that moment more than the madness needed its talon tipped hold. If she calls, I will crawl to her.

I would do anything for her.

Fight for her.

Die for her.

Live for her.

For them both.

It is easy to be a martyr, to decide to give your life for something.

It is far more a test of resistance to stay when you’re terribly exhausted.

I smooth my large hand over her flat stomach, picturing how beautiful she will look when her belly is rounded with our kit.

A sense of longing so strong slams me, nearly taking me off my hooves.

I want to see them, hold them, do all the things sires don’t do.

I want to teach my kit to hunt, or craft, to ride their Sihlih…

I want them to know me. Not as a male sent out to wander, but as I am now. The male who’s worthy of their mother.

Her quiet, tired voice hits me then. “Fafnir…” My eyes slide up to meet my mates, cradled still in my arms, standing just inside the doorway of our home. “We need to talk.”

I nod. “Yes, Sha'vria, but first let me savor you.”

“Shavera, what does that mean?”

“Cherished one.”

Tears well in her eyes. “I was so worried about you.” That statement seems to undo her, like admitting it out loud displaced the pebble that held the dam together.

She cries softly, held in my arms as I walk us into the bathroom.

I listen to her halted, shuddering breaths, noting every tear that mars her face as I undress us, slipping us under the warm stream.

There is more silence than discussion, more basking than washing until her chest stops heaving.

Her slight frame finally untucks from the confines of my chest.

When our eyes meet, it’s like galaxies collide, and our bodies follow.

I’m mindful of her arm as I lift her up into mine. Her core slick with more than water as she grinds against me. My needy little mate is already desperately seeking her own release. I let her, her throbbing cunt sliding up and down my mating cock, her hips rocking.

Her breasts brush my chest as small, panted whimpers leave her mouth. The moment I dip my head, mindful of my horns, I suck one of her rosy taut nipples into my mouth. She explodes. “There you are, my perfect mate.” I praise, loving the way she melts every time.

There's no working her up, no more teasing. My cocks are heavy and needy as I line up my pleasure shaft, shoving it into her until I bottom out. A deep groan leaves my throat as her cunt clamps down on it, squeezing, halting and then blessedly gives . I fuck her like that, claim her as thoroughly as I adore her. Lenora’s skin is flushed, her head thudding forward as she graces my chest, the brand there with sloppy, feverish kisses.

My hand knots in her hair, tugging her head back so I can watch her heavy-lidded eyes as I take her. She meets me thrust for thrust.

“You were made for my cock, such a good little human breeder. Such a pretty mate.”

She moans loudly. “Yes, I- I’m going to come.”

“Wait, my sweet Lenora, come with me.”

“I can’t.”

I tug her head back further. Only my cock lodged deep inside her and my palm flattened on her back holding her up. “You will.” She gasps as I release her hair, sinking my fingers deep into her mouth, making her gag. “Suck them like my cocks.”

She moans loudly and does just that. The sight of her wanton, desperately seeking pleasure, is my undoing.

I roar my release, my seed spurting across the shower from my mating cock as my other swells inside her.

Pulsing with its own waves of pleasure. I jerk her up, grinding her clit at my base until her scream follows.

Lenora

I’m fighting sleep off like the plague as I lie in Fafnir’s arms, bundled in furs only parted at my stomach.

My heart wrenches at the sight of the big, terrifying warrior adoring my belly.

Memorizing it as if something has changed since a week ago when he last painted it with his seed.

I didn’t take his mating cock this time, the healer having advised against it.

I watch him, imagining a life together, our life.

A life with an alien mate I never knew was out there, just waiting for me.

Mating is different, means different things for different species, but fated mates are sacred.

By the sounds of it, his gods brought me into this world to thank him. I don’t mind that theory much at all.

Breaking a sweet moment like this seems sacrilege, but my mind doesn’t agree with my heart. It's swirling, all the worst-case scenarios forming a prominent lump in my throat. The tip of my tongue is heavy, laden with questions. Soon enough, I can’t hold out, not for a second longer. “Faf…”

He sighs, adjusting himself to look at me, long plaited gray hair falling to the bed where he’s propped up on his elbow, looking very much like a relaxed, lounging god.

“The elder, Helgoid, is my dam, my father was sent out to wander shortly after I came into the world. He’d held off as long as he could, hoping it would be him to give me this. ”

I listen, somehow already fighting tears as he gestures to his brand. The long, curving antlers crossed over a shed.

“He held out too long… he almost killed her.” He takes a long, drawn out breath. “Wandering is a way of life after the madness takes effect, a way to regain our dignity in death.”

My heart stills, slowing like it doesn’t dare beat.

“As the madness takes us and its hold becomes unyielding, we are given a choice… wander and when it's time, fight with the dignity of Valhyr, or be ex ecuted.”

I gasp, my hand gripping my nightdress tightly. “Executed?! For what?!”

He ignores my outburst, his eyes so very far away.

“If we choose execution, it ends there. We are killed; our souls sent to rot in the land far beyond the glaciers….”

“And the wandering?” I whisper.

His eyes seem to come back then, swirling red when they meet mine. “After we’re sent to the wildness to wander, a hunt is organized…”

A quiet, choking sound leaves me. Knowing what he’s about to say and hoping against hope I’m wrong.

“The youngest warriors hunt us as training, giving us an opportunity to die in battle, regaining our place behind Valhyr’s gates.”

“They hunt you like a fucking animal.”

“You do not understand.”

“No, fucking of course I don’t!” I scramble off the bed, away from his touch like it’s on fire. My hands fly through my bedside table searching for my holo pager. He’s patient when I return with it.

Where I pant, his breath is even, steady.

Where my eyes are wild with fear, his are swirling but calm.

“Lenora, this is the way of things.”

“Fuck that! I will not let you be hunted and murdered for sport.”

“It is—"

“Fafnir, just- look , look at this.” My hands are shaking violently, my mind a deep whirl of dizziness and racing thoughts. “It isn’t a disease , not really. Humans have it too. It’s called PTSD. It’s a mental health disorder, not a death sentence.”

His eyes are narrowed, if not a little angry, but he listens.

Letting me ramble on, taking each and every note in as I read it to him, and by the time I get to the end, where I sent all my research over to the doctor, Fafnir’s face is stoic and unreadable.

I sit in heavy silence as he starts back at the beginning, reading everything once, twice, three times through.

The seconds drag on into ontics and ontics, verging on zentics when he finally lays the data pad down between us.

I hold my breath, sweat slicking my palms.

“This changes nothing.”

I swear my heart cannot take another fracture; my voice is small, smaller than I wanted it to be. I want to be angry and scream, but I don’t. I just don’t. “It changes everything, though. I- I’m your mate .”

“Do you even know what that means? You are human . Humans cannot recognize a soul mate.”

I shake my head, knowing he’s wrong. So wrong. “Being your mate means I can finally stop feeling like I’m breaking some stupid rule by loving you. It means I can stay… with the both of you.”

“I must wander, Valkyra. Even with a Bhaurnul spirit, the winter is harsh for a human body. It is no place for—"

I cut him off, gripping his horns as I stare down at him, tears in my eyes, sorrow clawing my throat. “You won’t wander, you can’t . I won’t let it come to that, but I need you to try for me. For us, because I want him to know you.”

His eyes widen, darting to my stomach. “Him?”

I sigh at that, knowing it’s silly as I release his horns. I don’t get far before Fafnir grips my hands, bringing them back. “It’s just a stupid feeling.”

“It’s not stupid. Never call it that,” he corrects vehemently.

“So, you’ll try? No matter what it takes?”

His eyes meet mine as he grips my face in his large hands. If I had horns, I’d imagine he’d be gripping me there instead. “I told you before, I will not give up. If even half of what was in those notes is true…” he takes me deep breath. “I want it to be true but—"

I shake my head, a sob leaving me. “No, no buts, not even one.”

He tugs me to him at that, kissing me softly, softer than a male like him should. “You said you loved me.”

I sniffle. “Of course I do, stupid male.”

He chuffs, tucking my head under his chin. My eyes widen as something damp reaches my scalp. “I ensure your love is not wasted on me, my Lenora.”

“ I love you too . That’s what you’re supposed to say.”

“I do love you, but such terms feel… inadequate. I suppose it’s better than anything I could come up with.”

My chin wobbles. He has no idea how wrong he is. Everything he’s done since the moment we landed on this planet has screamed love . Improbable, irrational, ill-timed love .