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Chapter Fifteen

Asha

I should’ve been more surprised when Thanatos told me I was going to die, but some part of me always knew it all was too good to be true. And to be fair, I was probably meant to die that first night we met. Deep down, I knew we hadn’t crossed paths by coincidence. He’d come for my soul. Whether that fate was put off a little to satisfy his curiosity, I couldn’t be sure. After seeing what he could do to those assholes, I’d be stupid to think I could avoid Death.

In a lot of ways.

But what I hadn’t expected was his insistence that he wouldn’t let it happen. Ever. I mean, come on, Death proclaiming he’d keep you from dying was as ironic as it got. Wasn’t that sort of his entire job description? I wasn’t an authority on how life and death was supposed to work, not that any of that religious babble my parents spouted my entire childhood held any truth, but something told me it was against the rules for him to tamper with my scheduled end. Pretty sure that was how someone lost their job, or worse, got punished in uncomfortably supernatural ways. Maybe Death couldn’t die, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t suffer like the rest of us.

So, when he asked me to come with him, I hesitated. Sure, I wanted to live, but could I really be the reason that Death went AWOL? Would there be human-world consequences should he act on it? Would we both be thrown into supernatural jail, forever tortured for one lust-driven decision? It wasn’t like he…loved me or I him, right?

That was ludicrous.

We’d only met two weeks ago. I wasn’t an early twenty-something with her whole life ahead of her and love on the brain. I was a woman of sound mind— sort of —who made logical choices— sometimes —so it’d be insane to label this as anything but lust at first sight.

I might not know much about the supernatural world order, but people—er, gods?—didn’t just give up their supreme position as Death for some mortal woman who could barely remember where she put her keys every morning. A woman who tripped over the same damn rug she insisted made the apartment look “fancy-chic” despite her best friend reminding her what a damn klutz she was on a normal day without rugs in the hallway. It didn’t make sense. Why throw away everything for some human who intrigued you?

Besides, I couldn’t leave Emily. She and I were ride or dies. Two amigas against the world. A pair of crazy ladies with only each other to live for. I couldn’t abandon her. But then again, I also couldn’t ask her to watch me die, either.

She wouldn’t understand. She’d be convinced I could be saved, never knowing it was Death himself who’d come to collect. Was it kinder to leave and promise I’d come home? To give her hope that one day she might find me again, then ruin her life in a never-ending pursuit of where I’d gone? Or would it be kinder to make her watch me disappear right in front of her?

Because when Zelus showed up at our doorstep, a part of me knew I wouldn’t come out of the exchange alive. Maybe because I sensed the monster he was. Thanatos had said he was another Horseman? Did he mean the ones foretold to bring the end of the world? Was Mr. Killer in the middle of starting the apocalypse? Because if so, spending time with Emily was paramount if the world was about to end.

Maybe he didn’t expect me to connect the dots, but I wasn’t that stupid. Death, Pestilence, the other two, it was just like the stories they told. But what did I have to do with all of that? That was the only thing that was unclear. Why was I important, and why did it feel like he’d abandoned everything he was meant to do by promising I wouldn’t die?

I stood at the door with a small bag of luggage, afraid I’d cry because Emily was smiling from ear to ear. I’d chickened out. I told her I was going on a little romantic excursion with my very rich boyfriend; that he’d pulled some strings with Major Asshat Boss and gotten us a few weeks off. She was over the fucking moon. I’d never seen her so happy for someone else. You’d think it was her who’d been asked to take a few-week vacay across Europe.

When I didn’t come back, it’d tear her apart, so I left a letter in an envelope addressed to her in my room to find. When I didn’t come back, she’d go looking for it. In the letter, I explained everything—how I was ill and only had a few days, maybe a week at most to live, and how I couldn’t bring myself to tell her the truth. I used every fucking mushy word I knew in that damn letter. Put every emotion I’d stored for a friend I didn’t deserve into that final goodbye.

Emily was the family I never had, so I made sure she knew how grateful I was that she’d stayed until the bitter end, and how much happier my world was because she’d been in it. I asked her to go on living for the both of us. With a shaky hand, I told her I loved her and sealed the envelope with a big, fat kiss because she deserved all the love I could put into every part of that letter.

A tear trailed down my cheek, and Emily rushed over, laughing at me. She’d never know how much I’d miss the sound of it. “It’s only a few weeks, Ash. You’re acting like we’re about to say goodbye forever. What are you, five? Mommy will be right here when you get back.”

“Eww, gross,” I complained, smiling despite the tears falling faster. “It’s all the dust in here because you never fucking clean. I better not come home to a mess, Ems. I’ll kill you if I do.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she replied noncommittally because Hell would freeze over before she dusted anything.

Thanatos stayed quietly beside me. His presence soothed the aching part in my chest. I wanted to believe that he’d save me, or at least save the rest of them, but I couldn’t be sure if Death even had that kind of power. If I could make one wish, and only one, it’d be that Emily was safe after I was gone.

“You better take good care of my girl here, mister. She’s all I got in the world,” Emily directed at Thanatos.

I couldn’t contain the tears, so I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheek. I allowed myself a moment to breathe her in because she was my best friend, my sister, and the only person I would ever call family because mine had failed me in so many ways. I wished I could tell her everything, especially about the maybe-apocalypse in our very near future, but I wouldn’t know where to start.

She wouldn’t believe me even if I did.

Emily waved us away, and I followed the silent man all the way to the curb where a car waited. It was sleek and expensive, so I cut a look over to him with a little smirk tilting my mouth. “Making sure my last few days are in the lap of luxury, hmm, Mr. Killer?”

He opened the passenger-side door for me, but he didn’t smile or seem amused at all. “I think you underestimate what I can do, little raven. Anything you could ever want will be yours now that you’re mine.”

His? Wait, was this Death’s way of comforting me? These last two weeks were top-notch weird. I guess I couldn’t expect to have life-altering sex without it being the literal death of me.

I’d let him believe what he wanted. Who knows, maybe he had a few tricks up his sleeve. My feeble human brain could only handle so much. It’d hit max the first day we met. Maybe shock or denial were to blame, but I didn’t want to spend my last days pining for more. Nor would I believe I’d get more if I asked. It felt like a lot of work arguing with someone who was determined to save you, whether or not it was possible. I couldn’t pretend to understand how all this paranormal nonsense worked, so I’d leave that to Death to figure out.

One promise I did make to myself was to enjoy the time I had left however that looked—and have it my way, it’d be skin to skin with a sex god. Well, god of death and sex. Might as well enjoy whatever perks I got out of this bat-shit crazy situation I’d unwittingly gotten myself into.

I stared at the red door that appeared out of fucking nowhere after Thanatos whispered something that didn’t sound like English. His fingers caressed my neck, moving red hair out of the way so he could drop a kiss on my shoulder. Shivers danced down my spine. I still hadn’t gotten used to how possessive his every touch was, but he never held back. Not since the first day we met.

Thanatos took hold of my marked wrist and brought it to his mouth, stealing my gaze with it. “I’m breaking a few rules bringing you here, so you should expect them to respond with…hostility.”

“Them?”

His icy irises sparkled with amusement. “The angels.”

Angels?! As in, more than one? Fucking fantastic.

Taking me by the neck, the gorgeous killer fused our bodies together. “Before we go in, I need your permission to do something. Think of it as a little insurance policy to ensure they won’t do anything to you.”

Do anything to me? What did angels have against me? I was hardly the worst sinner of the bunch. Okay, so I’d kicked a few asses and made a habit of saying the Lord’s name in vain—honestly, I still didn’t believe that person existed even after everything I’d learned—but I hardly thought that my lack of faith and history of ass-kicking warranted the wrath of every angel out there.

When I finally realized that my companion was still waiting for me to answer, I gave the silent supernatural predator a nod. “You’ve seen me naked, sir. And that’s after telling me that you control shadows and ravens and, you know, take souls for a living. Not sure if there’s much you can do that’ll surprise me anymore.”

For this being an alley to an elusive angel club, it was pretty unspectacular. It looked like every side street I’d traveled, if not a little weather-worn and isolated. Guess angels didn’t travel in flocks like badass birds of the sky to get here. Although, that’d be a funny sight, angels migrating together.

The shadows around us moved in agitation, and a few ravens flew overhead, cawing in their obnoxious way. Several landed on the railings, chattering at Thanatos. He turned his head. I was seriously worried for a second he’d caw back, and my image of him would be ruined. Hard to find a dude cawing sexy. I’d remember it every time he touched me, and the mood would be destroyed with it. But instead, he nodded at them and one flew off.

Something was up.

Cursing under his breath, the towering man turned his head back my direction. “We don’t have time, little raven. Do I have your permission?”

It felt weird that Death was asking for my consent when he was fully capable of taking what he wanted, but after the day I’d had, I didn’t have it in me to test my luck by making him wait out of sarcastic spite.

“You do.”

The area around his eyes went inky, growing like black vines down his cheeks. If I hadn’t seen it before, I might’ve been terrified, but the thrum between my legs signaled an entirely different response thanks to his daily barrage of sexy touches. Thanatos’s white-grey eyes glowed, traveling from mine to the area his thumb brushed on my neck.

My breath seized when I caught sight of his incisors. They were razor-sharp points. Wait…did he always have fangs? Where had those come from? I’d never seen them before. Was I somehow led astray by a vampire claiming he was Death? Leave it to me to be bamboozled by Lestat.

As if hearing the thoughts swirling around my head, Thanatos hushed me and fused our mouths together in a possessive kiss. With so little effort, he quickly eased me back into the safety of his touch. “I’m not a vampire.”

I could feel his amused smile against my lips, and I scoffed unattractively. “I didn’t say you were.”

“But you were thinking it.”

“Again with the mind reading. I don’t believe you anymore when you say that you can’t. You can’t fool me, Lestat,” I grumbled, and he responded by nipping my lower lip.

Another raven cawed, and the frustrated God of Death shot his eyes over to it before hissing something under his breath. It definitely wasn’t English. Or any language, really. More like a series of whistling exhales that were both dangerous and erotic sounding at the same time. Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past him to be speaking snake or something. Not that it made sense that he’d hiss instead of caw, but what did I know. Maybe ravens spoke snake, too.

He caught me thinking a little too hard on the subject, and the sigh he let loose was enough to annoy me. “That’s not the language of snakes, Ash. Why would I talk to my ravens in the language of snakes? That doesn’t even make sense.”

“What…I…you never know! I don’t know how this supernatural stuff works,” I whispered, narrowing my eyes on one of the ravens because it was clearly laughing at me. “And stop reading my thoughts, asshole. I mean it. I’ll smite you. You’ll wish Death could die after I’m done with you.”

His mouth twitched, but he didn’t give me the satisfaction of a laugh. Bastard. I was days away from dying, and he couldn’t even bother to laugh at my lame jokes? So rude. Ems would be doubled over already.

“Forgive me for leaving you out. They can understand any language, so I’ll aim to speak to them in a way that won’t leave you out.”

I wanted to argue with him that it didn’t matter what he did if I was going to be dead in a week, but something stopped me. If he wanted to be a weirdo and talk to his damn birds out in the open, have at it. But he continued without giving me the chance to rant spitefully.

“We’re out of time, Ash. She’ll be here very soon.”

She?

“It won’t hurt, but we need to share blood so they know just whose you are. I won’t take much, but you might.”

I might?

“Wait…you mean here?!”

His tongue was already pushing its way into my mouth, coaxing mine into action. Because that was his thing—do whatever he wanted and leave me to figure out the rest on my own. I should’ve been angrier than I was, but when the guy kissed like the Devil, it made my usually clever brain go to mush. Worse, I wasn’t even sorry. Might as well enjoy it if the hours before it was all gone kept ticking away no matter what I did.

I was pinned to the wall. His leg pushed between mine, and like always, the area it brushed pulsed with an eagerness I’d argue was his fault. Desperate for more sensation, I rolled my hips and rubbed myself over his thick thigh. The hard friction dragged another needy moan out of me.

Thanatos groaned in return, pushing against me harder than before. “Fuck.”

Our mouths collided violently. He sucked my tongue and tugged at my lips with his teeth, tasting and kissing me so thoroughly it flooded my hips with familiar heat—sensation I’d absolutely riot over if he left me unsatisfied. His thigh stayed firmly in place, so I continued to use it to relieve the uncomfortable tension building between my legs.

The friction was intoxicating. So fucking good. I always fell perfectly into his trap. Always the one desperately begging him to finish what he started. But he ended the kiss before I could really get going, and I was left in a daze, panting.

Thanatos looked down the empty alley before his piercing gaze was back on me. Without explaining, he drove his fangs into his tongue and came down for another kiss. I stiffened. Memories of the first time I tasted his blood came rushing back in. I’d thought it was all some kind of dream, but this time I knew for sure it wasn’t.

The second the warm liquid coated my tongue, I couldn’t contain the feral sound of need that dislodged from my throat. Thankfully, it was smothered by his tongue dancing around mine. I swallowed every drop that streamed into my mouth, thirstier than I’d ever been.

Groaning, Thanatos pulled his head just out of reach. He’d never looked more like a beast than he did now. His body wasn’t solid like it should be, and everywhere my eyes wandered was just another reminder this man was a supernatural beast. He looked like the monster he warned he was, and I’d never been so eager to be attacked by someone until he came tearing through my life.

Grabbing me around the throat, Thanatos forced my head to the side and licked my erratic pulse. When his fangs sunk in, all that hit my body was pleasure. It didn’t hurt, but I thought for sure it’d kill me.

His hand sunk between my legs, his fingers pushing past my wet folds, reaching deep inside and fucking me so hard my legs quaked and threatened to take me to the floor. His other hand wrapped around the back of my thigh, lifting it up so I could lock it around his waist. His hand returned to my throat like it belonged there. The hold he had on my neck tightened as he sucked harder, taking strong pulls of my blood into his mouth. He used his tongue to make sure not a single drop slipped away, and I clung to him, afraid I’d fall over if I didn’t.

I couldn’t explain it, but it felt like I’d been waiting for him to bite me since we met. Really bite me. It was the final piece to a puzzle I hadn’t realized I was trying to solve. Everything about it felt right, and from the way Thanatos growled into my neck and kept me firmly in his grasp, he was feeling it, too.

As he swallowed down greedy mouthfuls, I was unraveling. Coming undone. Desperate to have his pierced cock sliding in and out of me, fucking me shamelessly out in the open. Delicious sensation stormed my hips, relentless waves licking across my skin and setting my body ablaze. I was pounded by his fingers in time with my thundering pulse for what felt like forever before, without warning, the tension in my lower waist snapped.

I came so hard my vision failed.

“Oh, fuck. Thanatos!”

As soon as I came off the numb rush, the towering killer-turned-vampire stopped and wiped the blood coating his lips with his thumb. He visibly savored my taste by pushing the digit into his mouth with his eyes closed. A growl rumbled from deep within his chest. Then our gazes locked.

I couldn’t breathe.

The look he gave me was wilder than I’d ever seen him. Dangerous. Possessive. The eyes of a predator. Watching me carefully, Thanatos lifted his other hand to his mouth, the one he’d fucked me with. He licked each finger clean the same way he had his thumb. I nearly stumbled, but his penetrating stare demanded I watch. The thing was, I couldn’t have looked away if I wanted to. How could one simple act be the sexiest thing I’d ever seen?

His chest rose and fell, seconds away from attacking. But when he finally broke our eye contact, it felt like I could finally breathe again. “My mark looks much better on you, little raven.”

A jolt shot down my body. I’d never get over how quickly he went from stoic shadow to possessive beast. Faster than I could blink. The always subsurface yearning to be his prey rose into my throat. I wanted to run so he could chase and eventually catch. I wanted that carnal, lustful monster I knew was under the surface to put excited fear into my body.

Frustrated, I latched onto his shirt and tried to pull him back down. I didn’t care that we were barely a hundred feet from a public walkway. I wanted him to fuck me. And hard. I yanked him again with more insistence and went to my toes. His head dipped down just enough so that my teeth could grab hold of his lower lip. I bit him, and the black veins around his eyes grew like cracks in the ground in the midst of an earthquake.

His moon gaze narrowed. Every muscle in his body tensed, practically stone to the touch. The feeling in the air was electric. A warning. An ominous sensation of darkness. The same feeling I got the first night I caught his eye.

The look I gave him dared the Great Soul Taker to do something, and from the way his jaw worked and his neck strained, he’d gotten the message. His nostrils flared. But before he could dip his head back down and claim my mouth the way he wanted to, someone’s voice broke through our sensual stand-off.

“You have some bloody nerve showing up here and shamelessly throwing this in my face, Thanatos.”