Page 37 of Bound by Stars

“Hey, do you happen to have access to this one?” My voice is so overly sweet I’m even suspicious of myself. I point my thumb back at the door behind me, straining to keep my eyes off his vest pocket.

“No. That’s a private hold.” He waves toward the open door impatiently.

“I supplied this information two minutes and sixteen seconds ago, Weslie.” The white dots on her face screen both move in a circle as she spins toward Reve and moves through the exit.

I follow, glancing back at the locked bay one last time, imagining the rows and rows of ILSAs.

And there’s nothing I can do about it. Even if I found a way in, we’d be on Mars before I got through dismantling half of them on my own.

And they’d only repair the bots and get rid of me like I’m sure they plan to.

I could tell anyone who would listen, but what will it help against a multi-trillion-dollar corporation? “I wish I’d just stayed on Earth.”

Reve hums a reply, staying a step ahead of me.

“I always thought I wanted to be on Mars, but if it’s anything like it is upstairs with all the rituals and traditions, ruled by hierarchy, business deals instead of personal relationships… You should see the way people act around Sabine Dalloway like she’s a god.”

“I’ve noticed.” He rounds a corner.

I have to scramble to keep up. “It’s disgusting. All those first-class Elysian snobs.”

He laughs, shaking his head, gaze flicking back at me for a millisecond, but long enough to see there’s something more to it.

I take longer strides, keeping pace beside him.

His jaw is set, eyes focused forward. There’s a strange tension in every movement, unlike the relaxed and casually confident way he usually carries himself.

I’m talking about myself too much. “How was the rest of the party?”

He blinks slowly. “Fine.”

“Reve, you’re experiencing a sudden spike in body temperature. My scan does not indicate any signs of infection, which would suggest you are experiencing a heightened emotion,” ILSA announces from behind us.

“Thanks, ILSA.” He walks a little faster.

Wrong topic. I press my lips together, watching him in my peripheral vision until I can’t take it anymore. I grab his bicep and stop. “Are you mad at me?”

“No.” He turns to go again, but I pull on the back of his vest.

“Your heart rate and temperature would suggest otherwise. Try taking some calming breaths with me. In…out…in…out…”

“I’m fine, ILSA,” he snaps at her and finally looks down at me. “Can you shut her up?”

“ILSA, silent mode,” I say without breaking eye contact with him. “What’s with the cold shoulder?”

“I’m doing my job, Weslie. I have to get you back to first class where you belong.”

“I don’t belong there. I’m stuck there.”

“I’m so sorry.” He narrows his eyes, words dripping with insincerity.

“It must be so hard on you to live in luxury, being waited on and served excessive amounts of lavish foods while the people literally below you are fed rations. And I’m sure your fancy private room is torture compared to the sleeping pods and bunks we have down there. How insensitive of me.”

I drop my head. “You’re right. That was a stupid thing to say.”

“Yeah, it was.” He turns to go, but I pull him back again.

“But I’m just a visitor. A tourist. It’s not who I am!”

He laughs at me again, shaking his head. “Come on, Wes. Stop lying to yourself.”

“They aren’t my people. I’m going back to Earth after this, back to my normal life. Just like you.”

“Not like me.” His posture softens. His eyes are sad and distant.

Chewing on his lip, he takes my hand in his, rubbing his rough thumb over a faded scar on my soft palm.

“I remember when you got that. You fell in the orchard and that stick got lodged in your hand. You pulled it out and marched off like you were pissed at the stick for sending you home early.”

“And you walked with me the whole way.”

“I almost passed out watching the blood drip down your fingers.”

He’d held my good hand while my mom cleaned and sewed up the wound anyway. It wasn’t like it hadn’t hurt. I just couldn’t let him see me cry. I step closer to him, intoxicated by the familiarity.

“We’re a long way from that orchard.” He brushes his fingers through my hair, searching my eyes.

I want him to envelop me. Make me forget where we are. Forget the contest. That I ever stepped foot on the Boundless . Send me back to when the worst thing in my life was getting injured during an aggressive game of hide-and-seek.

His hand falls to his side, and he starts back down the hall again.

We climb the stairs in silence.

At the top step, he pauses, one hand on the railing, and nods to the door. “We’re near the escape pod bay. You know the way from here.”

I raise my hand to the control panel, pause, and turn back. “Reve, I—”

“They aren’t playing around with these threats.

” He squeezes the railing tight enough that his knuckles turn white.

“That thing at the Gala the other night, it was a party trick. No one got hurt, but they had to find a scapegoat. Create a cautionary tale. They made us all watch. Without any proof, they accused and condemned a man, and then shot him out of the airlock. He never hurt anyone, just did his job and kept his head down. Now there’s an empty bed in my bunk room, and all of you up there never even knew he existed. ”

My mouth hangs open. An execution. For little more than a presentation that interrupted a party?

“Don’t go wandering through the sublevels anymore. You belong up here now, Weslie.” His words are punctuated by the hollow clank of his boots on the metal stairs.

I peer over the railing as he whips around the first landing.

If I don’t belong down there, and I don’t fit in up here, then I’m somewhere in between.

Floating alone in space. If I’m being honest with myself, I was there before I got on this ship.

When my dad didn’t come back, I isolated myself until I didn’t think there was another human in the galaxy I could rely on.

I took myself out of the world long before I left Earth.

God, I’m an insensitive asshole. Reve’s working on this ship, while I’m experiencing the first-class lifestyle.

And Asha. She treated me like her friend from the first moment we met.

I shouldn’t have snapped at her. I’ve never had a friend so enthusiastically stick by me.

Even Skye. She accepted me without question.

And the way she looked after the engagement announcement.

She didn’t want to hurt me. She’s on a track.

Same as me. The course of her life is planned by her circumstances instead of her own choices.

If I push everyone away, I’ll end up alone. No matter which planet I’m on.

A question mark blinks on ILSA’s face screen.

“Yes, ILSA?”

The question mark blinks faster.

“Exit silent mode.”

“I liked him better before I was aware of his biological readings.”

“I thought you had a question.”

“More of an observation.” Her face goes blank. “Weslie, you are showing signs of distress. Perhaps you should limit my settings to identifying emergencies. All your emotional signals are exhausting.”

“ILSA, you’re a computer. You can’t get tired.”

She flashes a low battery warning on her face screen.

Over where her heart would be if she were human, her battery gauge glows like a badge. It’s entirely green. “You’re fully charged.”

Jupiter rounds the corner, stopping mid-stride, right before we collide. His chest rises and falls.

“Do I need to notify both of you of your irregular heart rates or can we all assume by now?” ILSA asks.

Rubbing the back of his neck, he opens his mouth to speak.

I drop my chin and rush past him. I wish I could shut down my emotional readings.