Page 63

“I was shocked when you told me that you were seeing someone else,” Doug began when they stepped into the suite.
“I know.” Guilt tugged at her gut. “I’m sorry I just dropped it on you like that, and over the phone, but I had to be honest.”
“I’m glad you were.” He stepped closer, his eyes glimmering with something she couldn’t put a finger on. “And it was the kick in the behind I needed, Hayden. It made me realize how much I don’t want to lose you.”
He reached out and tenderly stroked her cheek.
Discomfort crept up her spine.
“I love you, Hayden,” Doug said earnestly. “I should have said it a long time ago, but I wanted to go slow. I guess I was going too slow. I’m sorry.”
He moved closer, but he didn’t touch her again, or kiss her, just offered an affectionate smile and said, “I decided we’ve waited long enough. I want us to cross that bridge. I want us to make love.”
No, not the intimacy bridge. Hysterical laughter bubbled inside her throat. “Doug—”
“It’s finally the right time, Hayden.”
Maybe it’s the right time for you, she wanted to say. But for her, that perfect moment she might’ve shared with Doug had slipped away the second Brody Croft had walked into her life.
He reached out for her again, but she moved back, guilty when she saw the hurt in his eyes.
“It’s not the right time,” she said quietly. “And I think there’s a reason we never got to this point before, Doug. I think…it wasn’t meant to be.”
He went still. “I see,” he said, his voice stiff.
She took hold of his hand, squeezing his fingers tightly. “You know I’m right, Doug. Would you honestly be saying all of this, now, if I hadn’t met someone else?”
“Yes.” But his voice lacked conviction.
“I think we got together because it was comfortable. We were friends, colleagues, two people who liked each other well enough…but we’re not soul mates, Doug.”
Pain circled her heart. She hated saying these words to him, but there was no other choice.
Being with Brody had made her realize that she wasn’t going to settle for a man just because he happened to be nice and dependable. As wild and sexy and unpredictable as Brody was, he was also honest and tender, more intelligent than he gave himself credit for, strong, funny, generous…Oh, God, had she fallen in love with him?
No, she couldn’t have. Brody was just a fling. He might have some wonderful traits, but his career would constantly keep him away from her. She wanted someone safe, someone solid. Not someone who was so big and bold and arrogant and passionate and temporary and—Damn it!
She loved him. And wasn’t it ridiculously ironic that she’d figured it out the day he broke up with her.
“Hayden? Please don’t cry, honey.”
She glanced up to see Doug’s worried expression, then touched her cheeks and felt the tears. She quickly wiped them away. “Doug…I’m sorry,” she murmured, not knowing what else to say.
He nodded. “I know. I’m sorry, too.” He tilted his head, looking a bit confused. “But I don’t see what’s so wrong with comfortable.”
“There’s nothing wrong with it. But I want more than comfort. I want…love and passion and…I want earth-shattering.”
He gave her a rueful smile. “I don’t have much experience in shattering a woman’s world, I’m afraid.”
No, but Brody did.
Unfortunately, he also had plenty of experience in shattering a woman’s heart.
TWO DAYS LATER Hayden woke up feeling confused, devastated and angry. The anger surprised her, but most of it was directed at herself anyway. She’d tossed and turned all night, thinking about what a mess she’d gotten herself into since she’d come back to Chicago. She’d propositioned a stranger, then proceeded to fall in love with him. She’d hurt Doug. Discovered her father had a drinking problem and was probably a criminal.
And what exactly are you doing to fix any of it? a little voice chastised.
She forced herself into a sitting position, her anger escalating. What was she doing to fix it? She’d spent all day yesterday lying on the couch in her sweatpants. She’d watched the Warriors play the Vipers, trying to catch glimpses of Brody. And when the team had lost, her heart ached for him. The Warriors were officially out of the play-offs, and she knew how disappointed Brody must be. She’d been so tempted to call and tell him she was sorry. Instead, she’d devoured a carton of ice cream and gone to bed at ten o’clock.
How was that going to help anything? She wasn’t the type to let problems pile up without looking for solutions, and although she might not be able to “fix” Doug’s broken heart or Brody’s decision to stay away from her, she sure as hell could do something about her father.