Page 19 of Bloody Wedding (The Order of the Owed #1)

It’s a safety crutch and a temptation at the same time. I could smoke if I get desperate enough to light it, but just having it so close is a reminder of what will happen if I relapse.

I want Loni more than I do the relief from this awful headache. Besides, it won’t last long. I’ve tried quitting before, but never really had a reason to. She is my reason. There isn’t anything I won’t do for her.

Except let her go…

“Very well. In that case, I guess congratulations are in order. I hear you’re a married man now.”

As good as. I did the whole church thing, and I’ve got the wedding license ready to be dropped off with the registrar down at the municipal building.

I asked Loni her ring size over breakfast before I left.

I’ll have the custom ring started this afternoon, plus a belated engagement ring to go along with it.

So, yeah. I’m fucking married.

“I wish you could’ve been at the ceremony. It was a last minute thing, though. Didn’t even know it was happening until yesterday.”

Come on, Jack. You had a hand in planning Desmond and Loni’s wedding. You knew about it and never told me. Admit it.

He doesn’t.

“From my understanding, no one was at the ceremony except for my son and the priest of St. Catherine’s.” He tsks his tongue. “Okay. I heard from Father Francis, and I heard from Oliver. Dallas, too. What’s your story?”

What’s my story? The goddamn truth, and I tell him exactly that.

From the moment I arrived at the church, prepared to do anything to stop this wedding from playing out, and how I walked in, decided that just showing up was enough, that I needed to kill Desmond so I could take his place, and after the panicked guests in the church cleared out, that was what I did.

He can’t fault me. I had the right to do it, and between Dallas and me, it was cleaned up.

The body was brought to an Order-run funeral home for a speedy burial; more than Desmond deserves, if you ask me.

The church is pristine again, and a large donation from Mr. and Mrs. Heller will go a long way to ease the father’s traumatic experience.

‘Yes, Dallas told me the same.” Jack taps his fingers on the desktop. “I know he was involved in this, and I’m not surprised one bit that my troublesome boy decided to interfere. What about Sebastien?”

Fuck. Of course he’s going to zero in on Bas.

I shake my head. “I don’t recall seeing him around town lately.”

“Mm.”

Shit. He’s suspicious. Connor has his hands full with Haven right now, so it makes sense he was staying out of it.

But Bas? If I needed his help, he’d be there—and he was.

No way in hell as I admitted that to my uncle, though.

Not when he’s looking for any reason to get rid of him after what happened three summers ago.

Bas has never wanted to be one of the Owed. Coming from a family whose name is synonymous with the Order has been hard on the younger son, and I get it. Just like I’ll protect him from his own sense of self-destruction if I have to.

So I wait Jack out. I’m an excellent liar because I only lie when I need to instead of with every breath. He might think I’m full of shit, but the only way he’ll know is if I own up to it, and I’m not about to do that.

Finally, he sighs. “I’ve been on the phone with the St. Jameses all morning. They want someone to pay. An eye for eye, blood for blood. You understand.”

I had been sitting easily in the chair, my body language projecting calm and casual. Suddenly, I lean forward. “Bullshit.”

“Adrian—”

“No. That’s bullshit. I settled with the priest because he got dragged into something that didn’t involve him. Fine. But if Desmond’s folks want to be compensated for the loss of their son, that’s on you.”

“How so?”

God, the way he can pretend like he’s blameless… “I Claimed her, Uncle Jack. I made a blood oath to Avalon Dougherty and you sealed it. Ten damn years before that idiot tried to make her his bride, you already promised her to me .”

Jack’s new surgeon is really excellent. He can even move his eyebrows now.

“But she didn’t accept your Claim then.”

“Because she left ,” I snap, losing my composure. “If she’d been at the Claiming ceremony, she would’ve.” I would’ve made sure of it. “And yesterday… she married me yesterday. Isn’t that accepting my Claim?”

“From how I understand it, she married you for the same reason she would’ve married the St. James boy: because her father’s life was on the line. Would she Offer herself to you otherwise?”

I can’t fucking believe this. This… coming from the man who tried to downgrade her from an Offering to a Used only to change her back. I know why he did it, too. For the same reason he did it then: because my uncle will do anything he can to keep Loni from me.

Hell, no.

“For ten years, I’ve been the perfect Order member. I do everything you ask of me. I’ve been loyal. You can’t deny that.”

I’m that good. He has no idea that I’ve been plotting against him just as long because, on the outside, it appears as if I’ve been falling in line all along. I didn’t chase after Loni. I’ve thrown myself into fattening up the Order. We’re damn near untouchable because of me.

I deserve this.

“I can’t.”

Good. “Then give me Loni. That’s all I want.” All I’ve ever wanted. “Let me keep her as my wife.”

Jack thinks it over for a moment. I know he remembers the blood oath. He can’t say that I’m not right. I won’t go down for murdering Desmond, but he could easily decide to void my marriage because it’s fucking Wednesday or something.

He’s the King. What he says go.

And that’s why, when he tells me, “Until the next Claiming ceremony,” I have to grip the arm chairs to keep me from launching out of the seat and grabbing Jack by the collar.

“What?”

“I’ll let you have your fun, Adrian. But at the next Claiming ceremony, if she doesn’t stand there and let you Claim her, you will accept the Offering I choose for you.”

I won’t. I can say that much. But if he thinks I’ll take Haven after all this time when Connor finally has her…

“You see, there’s a fresh eighteen-year-old who would be a perfect and willing wife for a Collins.”

I blink. Set aside the fact that I’m proudly a Heller, Jack didn’t just try to tempt me with an eighteen-year-old kid , did he?

“Not necessary,” I retort. “I already have one. Remember? We don’t do divorce in the Order.”

“It wouldn’t be a divorce. It would be an annulment.”

No.

“Uncle Jack?—”

His eyes flash in annoyance, a signal that I’m pushing my luck. “She was never meant to be an Offering. She was damaged. Used. Don’t you understand that? I was saving you, Adrian.”

No .

He was keeping me in line and I allowed it.

Not anymore.

“If that’s so, why did you let Desmond Claim her? Why did you make her an Offering again after all these years?”

Jack shrugs. “Because he doesn’t have Collins blood.”

“No,” I agree, “but a Collins spilled it.”

Just like when I refer to him as ‘uncle’, he enjoys it when I debase myself enough to acknowledge my mother’s side. And it’s not that I have a problem with Mom. Oh, no. It’s her dick of a brother I can’t stand.

“You’re right,” Jack says, a hint of a familiar smile tugging on his lips.

“And that was my mistake. I didn’t realize how serious you were about Pete’s girl, but, in spite of all of this, you did sign a blood oath.

I’ll explain to Anthony”—Anthony St. James, Desmond’s father—“that, in the eyes of the Order, you were right to do what you did. But remember what I said. One way or another, she’s become an Offering again.

She accepted Desmond’s Claim, but blood oath or not, you didn’t give her the choice before you married her covered in the blood of an Owed. She has to Claim you.”

She will. She has to.

When I don’t say anything in response to his pronouncement, he adds, “When she does, we’ll host a reception for you both. And if she doesn’t… Lily Ann is waiting for you.”

She can wait forever. Loni is mine.

Jack stands up. Taking his cue, I do the same.

I know when I’m being dismissed.

However, before I go, I look across the desk at him.

“Will you tell her? That she’s going to have to attend the ceremony?”

I need to know how to do damage control.

As far as I’m concerned, this is just a stupid detail that I’m going to have to pivot around.

Loni is my wife. Not even Jack will change that.

But if she thinks she might have an out…

it’ll be a lot harder for me to convince her she wants to stay with me, wants to be my bride?—

“No, Adrian.” My uncle gives me a thin-lipped smile I know all too well. His lips part just enough to add: “You will.”

Damn it.