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nine

W ith Celandine bare in his arms, a vision of the future finally came to Troi.

He could see them together like this in Orthros. The marble halls and eternal snow of the Hesperine homeland looked different to him when he imagined Celandine there.

He trailed his fingers through her long hair where it lay across her hip. “Were you happy when you ruled here?”

She was quiet for a moment. “No. Yes.”

He nuzzled her shoulder. Her body fit as perfectly in the crook of his as he had imagined. “What made you say yes?”

“You will think the worst of me if I answer that question.”

“I am a condemned heretic, my dear. I will not judge you.”

“After my parents were gone…and my husband died…that was the only time I’ve ever been happy.”

Troi’s arm tightened around her instinctively. His words came out as a growl. “What did your husband do to you?”

“Nothing.” Her voice thickened. “We weren’t in love, but I never expected that from a political marriage. We were compatible, and he treated me well.”

“Did he know how lucky he was in you?”

“He was a good man.”

That didn’t answer Troi’s question. He knew the Cordian definition of a good man, and it wasn’t good enough for Celandine. He had been a good Cordian man just like her husband.

“I did mourn him,” Celandine said, so defensive, as if trying to convince herself as well as Troi.

“Of course you did.”

Her tears put a salty tang in the air. “I missed him. My parents too. And yet those five years when I was sovereign of Aligera were the best years of my life.”

“I’m sorry Rixor took that from you.”

She went quiet again. “He didn’t find out about my magic. I showed him.”

Troi’s breath caught. Cunning, worldly Celandine had handed such a secret to Rixor?

“You must think me a fool. And you’re right. I was a foolish young girl who thought my friendship with Rixor more powerful than selfishness and greed. Neither of us had brothers or sisters, so we grew up together, playmates and confidantes. But that sweet boy grew into a vile man.”

My sweet boy , Troi’s mother had called him.

“Rixor kept my secret,” Celandine said, “but not for me. He kept it for himself, until the day he was ready to use it against me.”

“I’m sorry someone you loved hurt you so deeply.”

“I miss the person he used to be. I miss my parents and my husband. But I miss my own happiness more than any of them. How could I have been so happy without them?”

“I suspect only you can find the answer to that question, but I know a place where you can search for it. You can have velvet and jewels. Endless nights full of music and dancing. You can use your magic as you please and remain sovereign of your own house.”

Sudden anger lashed out of her. “I can never get back what I had, Troi.”

“No. You can have something better, where the Orders can never find you. Come back to Orthros with me.”

She sucked in a breath. “And what would I have to bargain to Hespera for a life like that?”

“Nothing. No expectations. No demands. Simply come with me and see for yourself if you could be happy there. I know we’ve known each other for less than a fortnight, but we needn’t make any decisions or commitments.

We can live as lovers without a care, and no one will judge us.

You wouldn’t be dependent on me. Women can make their own way in Orthros on whatever path they choose. ”

She traced her finger over his ring. A new emotion fluttered inside her that felt suspiciously like hope.

He kissed her neck. “If one night you tell me you want the Gift of immortality, I will give it to you the same way I gave you everything in this bed. If power is what makes you happy, Celandine, I can give you power that will last an eternity, and no one can ever take it from you.”

“Are you happy as a Hesperine?” she asked.

He hid his face against her hair. The worst question she could ask, but the most important one. “I could be, with you.”

She rolled over to face him. “Will you tell me what really happened the night of your transformation?”

“If I answer that question, then you will think the worst of me.”

“You just fucked away my chastity and drank my blood, and after this, we intend to commit two murders. You needn’t worry about my opinion of you.”

In spite of himself, he grinned. He would rather fuck again and forget everything else. But if he had any hope of persuading her to consider a future with him, he had to give her the truth about his past.

His smile faded. He lay back, staring at the ceiling while he considered his words.

“My mother was a Hespera worshiper,” he began, “like all the women of her line. That much of the legend is true. She lived the life of a Cordian princess while secretly preserving human worship of the Goddess of Night. The manor where you found me was property she brought to her marriage with my father. Their political union proved to be a love match.”

“How rare that is.”

“Indeed. He adored her. She was his world. And when she gave him a male heir in the first year of their marriage, his happiness was complete.”

Celandine stroked Troi’s chest. “What went wrong?”

“She trusted him with her secret.”

“Oh no,” she whispered.

“I was twelve. It took that many years for her to feel safe revealing her beliefs.”

“He didn’t take it well, did he?”

“It destroyed him. And he destroyed her.”

Celandine twined her fingers in Troi’s. The hand he had thought might murder him mere days ago now offered him comfort. He would have thought it nothing but a play in the game of seduction, but her aura didn’t lie. His tale pulled at her heart.

“He couldn’t bear to turn her in and see her executed for heresy,” Troi continued.

“He was too in love with her. So he decided it was his responsibility to protect the world from her. Perhaps it was his way of protecting her from the Orders, too. He sent her away to one of our remote estates and kept her there under guard. She lived in exile, isolated from everyone she loved.”

“What a wretched existence.” Bitterness welled in Celandine. “Did you ever see her again?”

“I was permitted some time with her on the rare occasions when my father visited her and begged her to repent.”

“So he used you for bargaining power.”

Troi nodded. The familiar, oppressive anger made it hard to find words for a moment. But he kept talking, telling Celandine more than he’d ever confessed to the mind healers in Orthros during all their well-meaning, maddening attempts to help him stop hating his Hesperine existence.

“My father raised me strictly. Molded me into the model of Anthrian manhood. He was always watching for any sign that my mother’s ‘corruption’ might manifest in me.”

“All the songs agree you were everything Cordium admires in a man. Is that part of your legend true, too?”

“Yes.”

Memories of war invaded Troi’s mind. After all this time, they should be easier to push away.

But somehow his long sleep seemed to have weakened his ability to forget them.

Iovian, Remus, and Marto were no longer here to drag him out of his thoughts.

Or push his head in a barrel of cold water after he tried to destroy his memories with drink.

“I…did many things I am no longer proud of. I butchered my enemies and celebrated afterward. If not for my men, I don’t know what I would have become.”

“You were close to your soldiers?”

“They were my true family.”

“Will you tell me about them?”

“One night. When I can.”

She didn’t press, only laid her head on his chest. It seemed her capacity for affection was as boundless as her passions and her grudges. Somehow these nights of sharing lust and murder had awakened her tenderness, too.

He buried his hand in her hair. “When my father died, I was torn about reconciling with my mother. Her invitation to my coronation lay unsent while I debated with myself.” He cleared his throat. “It was still lying there on my desk when I received word that she had died.”

“Your grief runs in my veins.”

For the first time, those words held meaning for Troi.

“When my mourning period was over, I held my coronation feast. Hespera’s seat at the banquet was indeed empty. All the Orders sent their chosen representatives. Little did I know the mage of Anthros who said the blessing over my table was Rixor I’s brother.”

“Oh gods.”

“Of course, he gave up his titles when he became a mage. They all swear they leave behind worldly concerns when they enter the temple, including the feud between our dynasties.”

She snorted. “We know they seek that religious authority precisely so they can wield it as a new weapon in the feud.”

“Rixor had been trying to conquer Galeo for years, and I had defeated him on the battlefield time and time again. So his brother poisoned me in my own house.” Troi lifted his hand to display the ring.

“My mother left me this when she died. Her final words to me were in a letter, instructing me that if there was ever a time when all hope was lost, I should shed my blood on this stone. As I lay dying, I was finally desperate enough to take the risk.”

“What did the ring do?”

“It summoned an ancient Hesperine armed to his very sharp teeth.”

“Well, you must have truly thought you were going to die, then.”

Troi laughed. “Rudhira the Blood-Red Prince inspires either terror or adoration wherever he goes. He’s a Hesperine errant who leaves Orthros to travel in mortal lands, sabotaging the Orders and protecting the persecuted.

So there he was, the most powerful prince of the Hesperines, looming over me in his scarlet battle robes with a massive longsword in his hands.

I thought he was going to hasten my death by lopping off my head. ”

Celandine pushed up on her elbow, clearly engrossed in his tale. “How did you convince him to spare you?”