Page 4

HAYDEN

We all take up several booths as we get our fill. Our collective energy is boundless, but my personal vibe is a little low at the moment. I’m rattled by the thoughts I’d had back on the bus; I can’t begin to process the heaviness of it right now. I just hope the other guys don’t notice.

“Well, you’re a lot less snarky today, Hayden,” Declan says. There goes my hope of flying under the radar. “Is something up?” Declan is sitting right next to me, so it’s not exactly a surprise that my being quieter than usual has gotten his attention.

I take a sip of my milkshake. It’s dense and probably contains more sugar than I typically have in a week, but I couldn’t come to a retro diner and not order one.

“No, yeah, I’m fine,” I lie without a second thought.

What was I supposed to say? That I was thinking about their bodies for a good five minutes back in the bus?

I don’t even know how they’d react to that, much less what they’d think going forward.

So, the best course of action here is to just make something up. “I think road trips just burn me out.”

“I feel that,” Declan says, not seeming to pick up on my fib. “Sitting around on a bus for hours and hours gets to you.”

“You should get some air while we’re stopped. That should help give you a second wind.” Ansel’s suggestion is perfectly kind and valid, but it only serves to make me feel even guiltier for the way I’ve just lied.

I find myself staring outside the diner, seeing the cars pass by as the wind blows through the trees.

I haven’t seen this much greenery in a while.

“You know what,” I say after a moment, "I just might.” I take a final sip of my milkshake before standing up.

Without making much of a fuss, I quietly exit the restaurant, leaving the rest of the guys to eat their waffles and sundaes in peace.

As I step outside, the air is crisp; it’s the very epitome of autumn’s cool embrace.

The leaves flutter in shades of oranges and reds as they hang on by a thread, the trees themselves nearly ready to shed for the year.

I walk around a little bit, being sure not to stray too far away from the bus that’s parked next to the “convenience” store that really looks more like a supermarket complex.

It’s a pleasant surprise when I find a bench I can sit on a little ways from the diner.

“Well, Hayden, look how far you’ve come,” I say to myself as I sprawl out on the bench.

After a deep inhale and an even deeper exhale, I feel my body release some of the tension that has been building.

And not just today, since my intrusive thoughts on the bus, but also the tension that’s been building as I realize my college career is over.

When preparing to become a college athlete, plenty of people told me that it would be physically and mentally taxing.

But what people didn’t adequately warn me about was just how much it would fly by in the blink of an eye.

The thought of being considered a full-fledged adult in just a few months is daunting.

Just when I truly feel settled in this phase of life, a different phase is right around the corner.

I would never say this to my teammates, but I’ve grown fond of waking up every day and looking forward to hockey practice, and then coming home and seeing Ansel at his desk, racking his brain as he does his homework.

Right next door, Dom and Evan are always either eating something gross and unhealthy that they will share with us, or maybe they’ll barge in through our door just to show us a funny video they saw on the internet.

I guess it’s kind of a small life, but it’s one that I’ve come to love.

I’m not quite ready to give this routine up.

The cold air billows through my air, reminding me of what a privilege it is to be here right now.

The bad news is that I can’t stop the passage of time.

The good news is that I can allow myself to be a little sad about that.

The best news? Well, I can make the most of my remaining time in college—before this chapter of my life is done forever.

However, there’s always been a little regret about my college career, if I’m being honest. Seeing Ansel and Dom be so happy in their new relationships has highlighted how I’ve never pursued a serious relationship with anyone I’ve been with.

There were a few girlfriends here and there, of course, but even then, I never really felt that connected to them.

They were spectacular ladies, but I just didn’t love them in the way that Ansel loves Aria or Dom loves Maisie.

The guys, as rowdy and obnoxious as they are, are more emotionally intelligent than a stranger might think.

They try to cheer me up sometimes, saying that there’s someone out there for me, insisting I just have to be open to it.

And maybe they’re right, but I’m tired of hearing that.

Sometimes, love just sucks for people, and I feel like I’m meant to be one of those people who is unlucky in love.

“You look like someone just kicked your dog.” An unfamiliar voice calls out to me from behind.

Immediately, I turn around, thinking it may well be a stranger who’s up to no good.

Standing a few feet away from me is a guy with a devious smirk, staring me down as if my contemplative moment is the most amusing thing he’s seen all day.

I’m right that the guy is up to no good, but he’s no stranger.

“What are you doing all the way out here, away from the protection of your Seagull friends, Hayden Parker?”

It’s the goalie of the Wildwood Wolverines, the one who’s blocked every single one of my shots thus far in the season.

I only really know his last name from his jersey as I’ve never bothered to look him up.

Clearly, that doesn’t seem to be the case for him, considering he already knows my name.

There’s a dangerous glint in his blue eyes that instantly sets me off, almost like he’s looking down on me.

“Careful out here, Sanders. You might be roadkill if you don’t look where you’re going,” I reply with the driest tone I can muster.

Come to think of it, up until now, I haven’t been that snarky today.

Dom’s usually my target for any sarcasm I need to get out of my system, but the universe has provided me with a fresh target on this lovely autumn day.

“Where’s the rest of your weasel friends?

Tucked their tails and ran home already? ”

To my surprise, Sanders lets out a chuckle and sits down on the opposite side of the bench with me. “Your mouth’s always so venomous, you know that?” He crosses his legs by putting his left ankle on his right knee. “Makes me wanna shut you up real nice.”

I roll my eyes at his retort, not buying it whatsoever.

I look back to the convenience store the size of a chain mall and see some of his teammates messing around with each other.

I’m pretty sure that their team captain, Xavier, just slid an ice cube down one of their newer recruits, which is currently causing them to erupt with laughter.

I look back to the guy right next to me, not really knowing what to say.

This is the first time we’ve talked to each other outside the rink.

Coach Edmund did say that this training camp is a chance for all the teams to establish friendships with one another, so maybe dialing up the snappiness isn’t the right play here.

I let out a breath, trying to collect myself.

We’re not in the rink, so there’s no point in trying to trash talk this guy.

“Sorry,” I say. “This has just been a really long trip.” I’m not sure that my apology will buy me any good favor, and I want to scratch my eyes out when Sanders lets my words hang in the air for an awkwardly long beat of time.

At last he chortles, his body relaxing as he pulls his hood off and reveals a mop of dirty blonde hair. From the side, I can clearly see the outline of his jaw, with its sharp lines that complement his nose and— Wait, what the fuck am I thinking about right now?

“See something you like?” Sanders says, catching me off guard as an intense heat rushes across my cheeks and up the back of my neck.

“My, my. The least you can do before checking me out is ask for my first name, you know.” In just a few sentences, he has me backed in a corner.

It’s like he’s in my head, invading my mind.

And now I feel just like I do on the rink when facing him: vulnerable.

This guy knows which buttons of mine to push in order to make me lose my footing.

But I’m not one to back down without a fight.

“I could have sworn you looked a lot scarier under your helmet, but I’m just in utter disbelief at how dainty you actually look,” I say, clawing my way out of this figurative hole.

The way his scarlet lips tug up into a smile sends me a really bad signal. He thinks he has the upper hand.

“So, you think I look pretty?” Sanders counters me almost immediately, knocking the wind out of me although I’m still seated.

Typically I’m the clever one in my friend groups, and here I am, getting knocked around effortlessly.

“Hayden Parker,” he continues, "I didn’t know you were that much of a flirt!

You can at least take me out to dinner first before you try to sweet talk me. ”

I almost let out a groan of annoyance, but that would mean I’ve let him win. And I don’t want him to win. On the bright side, I have the entire week ahead of us to deal with this guy, so there will be plenty of opportunities to get the upper hand as the days go on.

“You’re demented,” I say emotionlessly, standing up and starting to walk away from him.

“It’s Theo, by the way,” he informs in a shout before I’m fully out of earshot.

I don’t know why I turn around to face him again, but in an instant I’m staring at his white teeth and his blue eyes shining bright underneath the afternoon sun. “But you can call me anything you want—so long as you keep those lovely gray eyes on me.”

Another intense heat surges to my skin’s surface, prompting me to turn away for good this time. I refuse to let him see me flustered like this. At least, not again.

When I approach the diner, I can see the boys about to leave, so I wait for them outside, rubbing my hands together to warm myself up.

My cheeks may still be stinging, but the rest of my body is responding to the chill of the air as we move further north.

As my palms heat up, I place them on my still-flushed cheeks and let out a sigh of relief.

Thank goodness it’s starting to freeze out here; my body’s need to stay warm is a good coverup for the fact that I guy from the other team has made me blush like a schoolgirl.

Stupid Theo Sanders and his stupid little comebacks. I’ll get him. I swear on it. I. Will. Get. Him.