Page 16 of Beyond the Winter Kingdom (Faeted Seasons #2)

“She’s mine ,” I hissed in response, voice dropping dangerously low as my fury let go of its bloodlust and descended into the ice-cold wrath it wielded so well.

My wings snapped out, catching the Nameless mid-lunge. My talons tore through its illusion, shredding the false skin until the creature shrieked and crumpled into a pile of dismembered limbs at my feet.

Amidst the blood and gore, it still wore her eyes as it died. And the sight of them lifeless sent me reeling.

I stumbled back, fighting the bile rising up my throat.

Silence dropped like a curtain.

“Vareck?” she murmured softly, and I tensed. Was I certain this body was truly hers and not another creature that learned her mannerisms while I was fighting? How sure was I that the real Meera stood before me?

I turned toward her.

She didn’t speak. Neither did I.

We just stared at each other; her eyes locked on the blood at my side, mine on the way her hands shook. My fury receded in slow increments, enough for my claws and wings to shrink and vanish into flesh, but the edge of it remained, like heat clinging to the last embers in the hearth.

“You okay?” she asked.

I nodded once, chest still heaving. “Yeah.”

“You hesitated.”

“I know.”

And she didn’t say anything else.

She didn’t need to.

I took a step forward, the distance between us charged with silent tension.

“How do I know it’s really you?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Ask me something only I would know,” I replied.

Her lips parted, and her breath stuttered.

“How many years did you dream of me?”

“Four. Why did it take you so long to find me?”

A flash of something sparked across her features before she buried it. “I didn’t think you were real.”

Then she was running, stumbling forward with an urgency that couldn’t be denied.

Crack.

Her palm connected with my face.

My head turned with the blow, not from the force—though she’d put some oomph behind it—but from sheer shock.

“What the fuck was that for?”

“You compelled me,” she seethed. “You stole my will and made me run away like some helpless damsel!”

“I had to.” My voice was low. Firm. “You weren’t leaving, and?—”

“How dare you. It was my choice.”

“You chose wrong,” I snapped back, my own anger rising. “I’m sorry my decision hurt you, but I’m not sorry I did it.” Her mouth opened, red cheeks flushing a deeper color that concerned me.

“Why?”

“You were in danger.”

“That’s not a good enough reason, Vareck.”

“It’s the only reason I need!” The anger in my voice echoed through the trees.

Meera narrowed her eyes. “This isn’t the first time we’ve been in danger together.

And guess what?” She threw her arms out wide, gesturing to our surroundings.

“We’re in the middle of hell . It won’t be the last!

You didn’t compel me to run when we were facing off Irene and her band of thugs. Why now?”

Her eyes roamed over me, stopping on the wound at my side. When she reached for it, I stepped back. “Don’t,” I growled defensively. Hurt flashed over her features. When Meera backed up a step, then two, I knew I’d fucked up.

“Please don’t run,” I said softly. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“You didn’t,” she replied stiffly, and we both knew she was lying. When I lifted a hand to reach for her, she moved away and held her hands up, palms out. “You don’t want to be touched. I won’t touch you.”

My chest squeezed, but I refrained from lashing out. Enough was enough.

“Do you remember what I told you?”

Meera scoffed. “You’ve told me a lot of things. You’re going to have to be more specific than that.”

“About furies. How our blood can curse someone?”

She sniffed once and hummed. “Yes.”

“When my fury takes over, if I bleed on you while it’s at the surface and it mixes with your blood ...” I struggled to form the words. To force them from my lips. To think that it could ever happen to her. “The curse takes hold, and you descend into madness.”

“Just from blood touching blood? Even if you didn’t mean to?” she asked warily, eyeing my wound with tight concern.

“Even then. There is no intent needed for the outcome.”

“I feel like I should have known about this before we attempted a blood oath.”

“I had my fury locked down tight and knew there was no danger to you.”

Meera pursed her lips. “Your eyes are blue right now, so your fury isn’t in control.”

I nodded. “But it’s not far from the surface right now either. Sensing my mate is in danger has it on edge. I don’t want to risk you touching it and something happening.”

Meera rolled her bottom lip between her teeth before biting into the soft pink flesh. “That’s why you didn’t want me here during the fight?”

I inclined my head again. “There isn’t a single part of me that would ever purposely injure you, but if we slipped just once and our blood came into contact with yours ...” I shook my head. “I couldn’t risk it. I couldn’t risk you .”

Meera softened a fraction. “I understand you don’t want to hurt me, but compulsion isn’t the answer. Taking my free will away—taking my choice away—is not acceptable. What I do in my life is not your call to make, and that includes when we’re in danger.”

“If something happened to you because of me, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. Not after watching ...” I broke off as my voice began to crack, unable to finish.

Meera quirked her brow. “There’s more to this than you’re admitting. Something you aren’t telling me. Have you accidentally hurt someone before?” Her voice was soft. Empathetic now.

I shook my head and ran a hand through the rough strands to pull them away from my face. “No, but my mother did.”

She squinted at me for a suspended second. Then another. Too quickly understanding washed over her features and her lips parted as she breathed in harshly. “Your ... father?”

I dipped my chin. “They were caught in a situation not so dissimilar to this one. They were traveling between realms and were caught off guard by assailants. There was a fight, and they both ended up bloodied by the end of it. My father startled my mother by putting his hand on her shoulder when it was over. She stabbed him before she realized who it was.” I tapped the center of my chest. “Right here. Her claws went straight through him. Missed his heart by a millimeter.”

Meera covered her mouth with her fingers. “Oh my god.”

“No one knows this. While my father physically recovered, that was the day he was cursed. The downward spiral into madness followed soon after.”

“How old were you?”

I smiled bitterly. “A year old.” Young enough that I didn’t remember the man he was before the incident. It was both a blessing and a curse on its own.

“You were just a baby,” Meera murmured. Her eyes watered with sympathy for me, and my chest tightened uncomfortably.

“You don’t need to feel bad for me,” I said, clearing my throat to push down emotion. “I knew my father as the mad king, nothing more, nothing less. It was my mother, brother, and sister that held out hope for him. For a cure. They loved him, even when he killed them.”

Her lips parted. The watery sheen in her eyes overflowed. Silent tears fell down her cheeks. “That’s heartbreaking. I don’t know what to say.”

I shrugged. “He might have been good once. I wouldn’t know.

What I do know is that they protected him when they shouldn’t have.

When he was too far gone. I was angry with all of them for a long time after they died because of it.

I couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t act against him when he was so obviously insane.

” I stared at nothing, my vision drifting to a blurred background, seeing a time that came and went decades ago.

“I think I understand their mindset now, for what it’s worth.

Not that it saved any of them in the end. ”

Meera wiped at her tears with the back of her hand and palm.

“I get it, Vareck. I really, truly do. What you saw— gods —what you experienced would be enough to create an immense fear and an immeasurable void in anyone, no matter who they are. I’m sorry you had to go through that, and I’m happy you told me because it helps me understand, but we need to set one thing straight right now.

” Meera crossed her arms and lifted her chin.

“You can’t compel me, even to ‘save’ me.

What if you had died and I couldn’t break through your persuasion?

What if I couldn’t help you? Did you think about that? ”

My throat closed in on itself. Yes , I wanted to tell her. I think about it every fucking second we’re in this godsforsaken realm. That something will happen to me and I won’t be there to protect you.

But that’s not what she wanted to hear, and I wasn’t going to lie to her.

“Yes, I have thought about it,” I said finally, the words heavy with my quiet truth.

“But when faced with two impossible choices, I asked myself which one I could live with. Your anger at being compelled and my possible death, or you losing your mind? It’s not even a question.

I would pick your sanity every single time. ”

Meera looked away, her jaw clenched. “It’s not your choice to make. That’s the point I’m getting at.”

“I know,” I admitted, voice low. “But you didn’t understand the consequences yet. I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry I didn’t, and that I took your will from you because of it.”

“You already said you’re not sorry you did it. Which one is it?”

“Both. I’m not trying to own your decisions, Meera. But I am trying to keep you alive long enough to be mad at me for them.”

“That’s not fair,” she whispered, finally meeting my gaze. “You think it’s noble, what you’re doing. Sacrificing yourself to protect me. But it’s selfish.”

I blinked, taken aback. “Selfish?”

“You don’t get to shoulder the world and then die on that hill without considering what it would do to the people left behind,” she snapped. Her voice cracked at the end, revealing the rawness beneath the anger. “To me.”

I exhaled slowly. “You’re right.”

She tilted her head. “What?”

“You’re right,” I repeated, a bit louder. “What was that phrase you told me about? I’ve spent so long having to carry my own fridge, I forgot how to let someone carry it with me.”

Meera blinked rapidly, emotions flashing across her face too fast to catch. She almost smiled.

“I hate that you compelled me,” she whispered.

“I know.”

“I understand your reasoning, but it’s not enough for me to tell you it was okay. Don’t do it again.”

I lowered my head in a partial agreement. “Only if you promise not to throw yourself in front of the next pack of flesh-eating revenants we meet.”

She glanced at my side, seeing it had healed. “I make no promises.”

I groaned, starting to take the remains of the shredded shirt off my body. “Gods help me.”

“I’m pretty sure we’re beyond their help.” She jerked her chin toward the forest edge. “We should go. That fight probably drew attention. You can get cleaned up at the pool before we head out.”

I nodded. “You want to lead, or should I?”

She glanced at the trees, then back at me with a smirk. “You’re the one who shredded your shirt mid-rampage. Pretty sure if anyone sees us coming, they’ll assume you’re the monster and I’m your hostage.”

I chuckled, the sound dry but real. “Fine. I’ll lead.”

With blood on my hands and her fire at my back, we walked into the dark like it was ours to claim.