Page 22 of Beyond Pride, Past Prejudice

Elizabeth entered Mrs Gardiner’s comfortable parlour, utterly surprised and full of curiosity as she found Lady Oakham waiting for her.

Only a week or so had passed since her return from Rosings, yet Lady Oakham had already called—an early visit that spoke plainly of her interest in making Elizabeth’s acquaintance.

“I am pleased to finally meet you, Miss Elizabeth,” Lady Oakham said with a warm smile that dispelled Elizabeth’s doubts and hesitancies.

“The pleasure is mine,” replied Elizabeth, a beautiful smile displayed on her face.

“I had hoped to see Mrs Gardiner and Miss Bennet as well,” Lady Oakham said, glancing about.

“They left half an hour ago to take the children for a walk in the sun after this prolonged rain.”

“Of course, I understand how it is. I have two little rascals of my own.”

They fell silent, neither of them certain how to proceed, but Diana was a determined woman.

“Miss Elizabeth, I came to talk to you about a difficult subject.” That rather abrupt beginning pleased Elizabeth, but she could not deny a trace of worry shadowing her heart.

She nodded with a smile, inviting the lady to speak, uncertain about the subject—or, to be honest, she supposed the subject was Fitzwilliam Darcy, but she could not imagine the direction their conversation would take.

“I feel as though we have been friends for a long time. Your aunt talks a lot about you, and I intend to be sincere and tell you that I have had some interesting conversations about you besides those with Margaret,” she finally said.

Elizabeth’s heart gave a painful leap, imagining for a fleeting moment that Mr Darcy had mentioned her.

“I hope you have heard pleasant things about me,” she replied, deciding to use a playful tone that could hide her turmoil. However, she quickly dismissed Mr Darcy as the source of the lady’s knowledge, so it must be Colonel Fitzwilliam.

“ Only pleasant things,” agreed Lady Oakham. They sipped their tea silently, conscious of playing a game they both knew the rules to and rather enjoyed.

“We are worried about our cousin, Mr Darcy,” Lady Oakham proffered unexpectedly and directly. Elizabeth blushed, suddenly incapable of hiding her torment, which was indeed observed by the astute lady. “You are wondering why I am involving myself in such a personal and delicate matter.”

As Elizabeth did not respond, she continued with the same pleasant smile that had not left her face since the conversation began.

“Miss Elizabeth, I have had the fortune of marrying into a warm and loving family, much like the one I was raised in.

The wife of Mr Darcy is someone of great importance to us.

We spend much time together—summers at Pemberley, dinners two or three times a week, excursions through the countryside.

We share a great deal, especially since old Mr Darcy died.

Since then, Fitzwilliam has been a constant presence in our lives.

“I am now a selfish woman, and I do not wish for anything to change.” Lady Oakham laughed, and Elizabeth finally smiled, won over by her ladyship’s warmth.

“As you suspect, I know what happened in Kent—” Lady Oakham paused but did not look at Elizabeth as she completely understood how difficult it was for her to openly discuss such a personal subject. “I apologise for intruding in your life.”

Elizabeth looked at her and murmured with determination, “Please, continue.”

“Well then… My friendship with Margaret and the trust I place in her assures me that Fitzwilliam choose wisely when he asked for your hand in marriage. Wisely for all of us, but most of all for himself, I assure you. That is the reason for my indiscretion. Margaret’s motives for involving herself are just as clear—she loves you with all her heart and desires only your happiness.

But rest assured, she was not the first to commit any indiscretion.

I was the one who wrote to her about what happened in Kent and all that the colonel confided.

I must tell you that I know the story in great detail.

For the first time in his life, Darcy unburdened himself to the colonel.

Richard, clearly unsettled, came to me for advice, certain that our cousin had been most offensive in the manner of his proposal.

His only aim was to arrange a meeting between you in the hope that—under calmer conditions—you might speak again with a chance to express your thoughts differently. ”

Elizabeth shook her head and said hesitantly, “Our feelings were rather…turbulent and uncertain.”

“I have to contradict you, Miss Bennet. Darcy’s feelings were obvious, so we felt justified in interfering. What we did not know was what you felt. And so, I wrote to Margaret, who replied that, although you refused him, your feelings were not entirely…averse.”

Suddenly, Elizabeth felt an irrepressible wish to laugh.

She had always been completely opposed to any interference in her life, yet now she was ready to place her fate in the hands of this intelligent and beautiful woman.

It was not only the hope that she might have another chance with Darcy—which she wished for with all her heart—but also finding out from Lady Oakham’s words that they were an ordinary, loving family who lived a fulfilling and pleasant life.

“Knowing all these things, we desire only for you to meet and converse, and, as you can see, the decision remains entirely yours.”

“I believe you,” said Elizabeth. “That is to say, I believe everything you have told me. Yet one thing remains incomprehensible to me.”

“I am listening,” Lady Oakham replied. “I shall answer you with complete sincerity, as I have done until now.”

“You describe a family life much like our own. People who respect and love one another and genuinely enjoy living together.”

“That is exactly how we are!” Lady Oakham exclaimed with conviction.

“But Mr Darcy seems so distant from that image. I do not see him as warm or affectionate.”

“You are not mistaken. He is somewhat reserved, though he participates in everything we do. That is precisely why his wife will be essential—either in drawing him fully into our circle or turning him into a polite yet distant man. His love for you is a crack in the wall he has built around himself, and you have the power to bring it down completely. I believe what drew him to you, beyond your beauty and wit, was also the feeling that you could change him into a man less bound by the rigid expectations of the society in which he lives.”

“A delicate way of saying he is arrogant towards those he does not consider to be his equals.”

“Perhaps. But I do not know him as such. I know him to be somewhat reserved but entirely devoted and exceedingly generous. These are important qualities, showing that his nature can indeed be improved. And he is frank. I understood he told you about Georgiana’s misadventures.”

“So…what he wrote about Mr Wickham and Miss Darcy…is true?”

“At least you may be certain he does not dissemble. A man incapable of concealing the abhorrent truth of his sentiments towards your family is unlikely to lie about other topics. Yes, Wickham is the vilest of scoundrels. He sought to seduce Georgiana for her fortune.”

“I am profoundly sorry for Miss Darcy’s dreadful experience and for believing Mr Wickham’s falsehoods about Mr Darcy. But…Lady Oakham, please believe me when I say Mr Darcy is mistaken about my family.”

“Knowing Margaret, Miss Bennet, and now you, I am certain that Darcy has a false image of them.”

“I admit…I was wrong too. I behaved poorly, letting my anger speak for me. I should have urged him to be patient and lenient towards my mother and younger sisters. My mother is responsible for the image Mr Darcy formed of Jane. Still, I refrained from telling him, for it would have meant disparaging Mama, and I have no wish to do so.”

“I see. And I find you to have remarkable care for your family. And besides, I am confident that the father who raised you and Miss Bennet to be such admirable young ladies must be a remarkable man himself.”

“He is. And you cannot imagine how Mr Darcy and Papa resemble each other. Knowing my father made me see that some ‘inclinations’ are not genuine faults.” Elizabeth smiled.

“Initially, I loathed Mr Darcy for his arrogance. Then, in Kent, he changed unexpectedly into a man I did not like either, and my loathing dissipated and gave way to…ennui.”

“Hate is not so close to ennui,” Lady Oakham observed playfully, lightening the serious tone she had been using until then.

“I was confused about my feelings, but love was not among my guesses.”

“You did not love him, or did you not know you loved him?”

Elizabeth hesitated to answer as the matter was still unclear, and she had not yet arrived at the point where she could accept when her true feelings for him had begun.

“There was no love in my soul,” she said with a slight hesitation.

“In Hertfordshire I encountered an arrogant man who became utterly dull in Kent, so different from the man I had first known. And to tell you the truth, I preferred the acerbic aristocrat who, on the night we met, proclaimed that I was not attractive enough to tempt him.”

Lady Oakham hid her face in her hands, unable to bear more of this tale, which should have culminated in happiness.

“Are you laughing?” asked Elizabeth, also amused.

“That was my first impulse, but I do not dare in the present situation. Miss Elizabeth, you have to meet.”