Page 76 of Beneath Your Beautiful

“I thought you might.” He took a swig of whiskey and stared at the bottle in his hand. “My second deployment…we were out on patrol, crossing a field. Me and my buddy Casey had metal detectors, scanning the area. We were just about to cross a dirt road. It looked like fresh earth had been dug up, so I told Casey and Jonesy to stay back and I’d inspect it. Next thing I knew, I was blown off my feet. I woke up in the field, and I stared up at the blazing sun. For a minute, I thought I was dead. It was so fucking quiet. But then I heard voices and I knew I wasn’t dead. The IED had blown a crater in the road waist deep. I jumped in and the first thing I saw was a leg. Then I saw Jonesy. Both his legs were blown off, but he was telling me about the car he planned to get when he got home. His fucking legs were gone, and he was talking about a car and I was telling him it’s gonna be all right. You’ll get that car. A few guys jumped in to help. In my head, I was telling myself that Casey O’Malley is somewhere in that field. And he’s okay. But I saw his boot sticking out of the dirt and I started digging him out…”

While he’d been telling me the story, he’d used that same automated voice I used when I told Eden my Johnny Ramirez story.

“We carried Casey back to base camp in a black body bag. My best friend was dead, Jonesy got his legs blown off, and I got away with a twisted ankle and some scrapes. I’ve replayed this thing in my head so many times, and I always ask myself what I could have done differently. Did I trigger that IED? Why did that happen to them and not me?”

Jesus Christ. How did he live with those images? I closed my eyes and leaned back against the trunk of the tree. “It wasn’t your fault,” I said finally, and I meant it.

I tipped back my head and looked up at the stars reeling in the night sky. Unbelievable that the world kept spinning. The stars still came out at night. The sun rose and set every day in this fucked-up irrational universe.

“I never told my family or friends that story,” Sawyer said quietly.

“Why did you tell me?” Although I had some idea.

“You look like you’ve been to hell and back.”

“I look that good, huh?” I joked.

“Ridden hard and put away wet,” he joked right back at me.

“You shouldn’t talk about your sister that way.”

He held up his hand. “Spare me the details.”

“You weren’t gonna get any.”

“She traded up, that’s for damn sure,” Sawyer said.

“Is he as big of an asshole as I think he is?”

Sawyer passed me the bottle of whiskey, and I took a swig. Jack Daniel’s, not my favorite. I passed it back to him and crossed my arms over my chest, waiting for an answer. “I never liked him. Everyone in this town treated him like he was God’s gift. They called Luke and Eden the golden couple, but it was high school bullshit. Luke is shallow. He never knew the real Eden. She’s a pain in the ass but my sister is cool as shit.”

I already knew that.

Eden placed an armload of wrapped presents in front of me. Oh hell, no.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“What does it look like? Your birthday presents.”

“I told you not to buy me anything.”

“Yeah, well, you’re not the boss of me so I ignored you.”

Sawyer and Garrett snorted and took a seat at the table. “Get used to it,” Jack Madley said, throwing the steaks on the grill. “She’s been ignoring my good advice for twenty-two years.”

Eden rolled her eyes. “I get such a bum rap around here.” She smacked me on the shoulder. “Open your presents. They’re not just from me.”

“The T-shirt is from me,” Sawyer said.

“The whiskey is from me,” Garrett said.

“You guys are the worst,” Eden huffed. “It’s supposed to be a surprise.”

They shrugged and settled back with their beers. Eden sat across from me and snapped a photo. I held up my hand. “No.”

More snorts in unison from the Madley men.

“Fine.” She scooted her chair closer to me. “Open your stupid presents.”