Page 16 of Beauty and the Grease (Midlife Meet Cute #4)

Jenny

Back home, my Sunday is my sanctuary. PJs and retreat. Not retreat center retreat, but retreat to the blanket cave on my couch. I’m going all in on the full Pride and Prejudice BBC miniseries.

I’m drained. Emotionally exhausted and a not a small bit horrified at how close I grew to feeling things for Chase all over again.

That dinner. It might have provided closure, but it was a mistake. Men in power exposing our secrets for their own amusement is not something I needed to witness. I know Chase is genuinely sorry. He didn’t want that nightmare for either of us.

I cried the whole drive home. I cried for emotional release and because I have unanswered questions. One thing I know. If Chase and I become something more, if we get together again, I’ll lose myself. I’ll lose the identity I’ve worked so hard to build.

I’ve come too far to give up all I’ve gained.

My phone explodes with texts. This must be what sixteen-year-olds experience daily. I hit silent on my phone, but turns out, I’m as addicted as Gina and can’t quit the siren call of the notification. Gina and Ameriel want the scoop—they heard about a dust-up at the corporate dinner.

Give me Darcy or give me death! I set the phone aside and slide in the first DVD.

As the Bennet family’s troubles unfold on screen, my thoughts wander to yesterday. Four little words pick the locks of my gated internal storage. Chase said them with passion and conviction. Those words unravel the tidy story I’ve told myself all these years, that our marriage was null and void.

Four little words I can’t unhear. She was my wife.

Monday at the shop, I’m on autopilot. The Audi’s parts are on order. Chase hasn’t called about the car. I refuse to let myself feel bad for not giving him a ride. Someone could have easily driven him home.

Business is slow. So slow I do what I’ve been putting off for weeks.

I open an email sent months ago from Simon, who provided my business grant. It’s a phone number and email for a part-time payroll service.

I’ve been too scared to call. What if I hire them and then business tanks and I can’t pay them?

But I just looked through the books. The money is there. It’s not realistic for me to work every day except for scheduled dentist appointments and mammograms. Taking this step means trusting the business won’t instantly fall apart if I outsource some of the work.

And even if it does fall apart, I’m still worthy of being loved, appreciated, respected. Right? I check the new sticky note on my desk. You are worthy of being loved. Okay. Got it.

I wander into the salon, empty of customers. Annabelle swivels in her chair in a lazy spin. “Want a haircut?”

I pause in front of the coffee station, looking at the painting above it. An abstract cityscape. Chase was wrong; this is one of mine. I painted it after he left. It’s technically good, but something is missing. Spirit, life, passion.

“I was married once,” I say.

Her chair slows to a stop. She stares at me.

“It was annulled. Do you know anyone whose marriage has been annulled?”

She shakes her head no.

“It’s surreal. It’s like you’re supposed to believe it never happened. But I have this.” I hand her a photo from my back pocket. I took it out of a storage box in my closet yesterday.

Annabelle scrambles like a cat with no traction wildly coming to all fours. “You.” She points at me. “You’re in this photo with him, the Audi—the hottie.” She sputters incoherently until finally she gets it out. “You two were married?”

“Or were we? Dun dun duunn.” My corny music doesn’t break through her shock.

“Jenny, this is so romantic.”

“Romantic? It’s tragic! Do you know what this weekend was like for me?”

“What happened? Did you kiss? Are you two back together?”

“What? No! Why would we be? Our marriage was canceled by his family. By him. It was voided out.”

“That is tragic.” She focuses on the photo. “You two look so happy. No wonder he looks at you that way.”

“Looks at me what way?”

“With longing. I sensed it but couldn’t connect the dots. I figured old high school crush or boyfriend even. But married? Marriage is a different story.”

“He called me his wife.”

“Naturally.”

“No, this weekend. When he told off his boss. This cretin was trying to shame him and brought me into it. Chase said, that was my wife.”

Annabelle presses a hand to her chest, still clutching the photo. “He loved you, Jenny. This is all very intriguing.”

I don’t know about intriguing. “Are you upset I didn’t tell you?”

She looks at the photo again. “This must be incredibly hard to talk about. Especially if the annulment wasn’t your choice. Thanks for trusting me enough to share.”

Tears overtake me. “I don’t want to see him when he comes for his car.”

Annabelle lunges for a hug. “We’ll make a plan. This stays with me. I won’t tell a soul.”

“Kara will know as soon as you see her.”

“That girl can read me like a text message. I don’t know how she does it.”

#

My funk of a mood continues through the week, so I throw myself into work.

Gina and Ameriel stopped by and fawned over the salon in person.

Gina asked to run my social media—her idea, and for free.

Annabelle and I are working on a plan to pay her together to promote the total experience of our auto shop and salon.

Gina can work remotely while she’s running her household and caring for her kids. If it works out, it’s a win-win.

Despite Chase’s now-repaired car in my sightlines, I manage to avoid thinking about him. In fact, I’m so busy not thinking about him, I’m shocked when he finally shows up.

It’s the girl I notice first. She’s lanky and all limbs, with dark blond hair wrapped in a messy bun.

She has Chase’s exact eyes and nose. The boy is more filled out, with angular shoulders and the same shaggy hair many of the teen boys have in Derby.

She’s in the salon, flipping through a hair magazine, one of the wilder ones with styles from high-end hair shows, while her brother stands beside her, occupied by his phone.

It’s them. I know it instantly. I see them through Chase’s eyes. At pizza night with Chase, getting carted around by their mother, on family vacations in tropical places. There’s a whole life I don’t know wrapped up in those kids.

“Jenny?”

Chase’s voice comes from the doorway leading from the salon into the auto shop. Annabelle is busy with a customer—so much for our plan.

I tear my eyes from his spawn and plaster on a smile. “Is your car ready?”

He doesn’t answer, turning from me to the salon waiting area, then back to me. “Did you meet them?”

I want to say, “Meet who? What, those kids I knew were yours?” I only manage to shake my head no.

He moves toward me. “I didn’t plan on bringing them, but schedules changed. Since I’m not working and the kids are off from school this week…”

“You don’t have to explain.”

“We all came in together,” he went on anyway, “but I needed to wash my hands in the bathroom—sorry, you said not to explain.”

Neither of us speak. Neither of us move. We’re acting like very mature adults right now.

I don’t want anything to do with Chase. Not if I want to stay the woman I’ve become. An independent business owner who isn’t defined by any man. Especially this man.

“Dad? Can I get my hair like this?” Emma squeezes into the space between him and the wall, angling the magazine toward him.

Chase can’t hide his confusion. “Um, that’s a question for your mother.”

She dissolves into an adorably dorky laugh and covers her mouth. “I’m just kidding. This magazine has weird hair.” She looks up at me with her wide, pretty eyes. “Sorry to interrupt.”

“It’s fine.” I can’t help examining how much she looks like Chase, but I don’t want to make this kid uncomfortable.

Emma is about to zip off when Chase places a gentle hand at her shoulder. “Actually, Emma, this is the person I was telling you about. She owns the repair shop.”

“Oh, really?” Her voice is light and shy. She curls into the protection of her dad, but adjusts back, as if she’s reminded herself she’s twelve and too old for that. Even though she isn’t. “Nice to meet you.”

Manners. She has manners. And she’s sweet. “Nice to meet you too. I’m Jenny.”

“Like the sign.” Her shy smile widens and my heart cracks right open.

Geeze Louise, I’m a goner. “Annabelle over there, she runs the salon. She would love to do somebody’s hair like the pictures in that magazine. Nobody in Derby is bold enough.”

She giggles again.

“There’s Owen.” Chase nods to his son a few feet away.

Without looking up, Owen flashes me a peace sign. “Yo.”

“He thinks he’s so cool,” Emma tells me in her soft, round voice. “He’s so not.”

Annabelle suddenly comes into view. “Hi. Chase, is it? Hello. Hi. Can I help you with anything. Coffee? Water? We have water for the kids.” She shoots me a panicked look and mouths, “Sorry.”

I flash her a smile. “Uh, yeah, water for the kids sounds great while we get this bill sorted out.”

Chase follows me to the auto shop front desk. Kara is at lunch, leaving me to finalize the payment. “Did they go over the repairs? Any other questions?”

“Jenny.” Chase speaks close without invading my space. “This was a lot to spring on you. I promise I didn’t mean to ambush you with the kids.”

“I know.” I keep my voice light.

“You set boundaries, and I fully intended to respect them. Now I’m wondering if I ruined any chances.”

My eyes have the nerve to tear up. I breathe slowly to keep control, staring at the computer screen. “What…chances?”

“You said you needed time. I want to give you time, but I also want to see you again. On your terms. Name your terms.” His voice is a bass note my stomach latches onto.

I dare a glance at him. Without a word, he brings a gentle finger to my eye. The tear rolls over onto it. “Jenny, I’m so sorry for hurting you. I don’t want to end this way, but I’ll go if you want me to.”

In the salon, Emma’s giggle trickles over, followed by Owen’s deeper laugh.

What am I so afraid of?

Hurt. Rejection. His parents can’t stand me. Disappointing Chase. Disappointing his kids. So much.

“I told my parents I ran into you,” he says as if reading my thoughts.

“When I told my mom you’re running your own business, she asked to know more.

You know what she said after? She said sorry.

She’s felt guilty for years about pressuring us to end our marriage.

Especially after how things with Lisa turned out.

They never got on well after the wedding.

When the kids came along, my mom felt shut out.

Lisa was controlling and belittling to my parents, especially to my mom.

My dad always liked you. My mom, she feels a lot of regret. ”

“They sent their lawyers on the attack. They couldn’t even tell us themselves they wanted the annulment. They did it through their attorney.”

“I won’t excuse their past actions, but I believe they’ve changed. In case they are a worry for you.”

The front door bangs behind one of the mechanics returning from break. I shake sense into myself. “We take cash or charge. For a check, I’m going to need to see ID.”

The light dims in his eyes. I’ve dashed his hope.

I had to. I had to.

This is what’s best. This bill is our final transaction. This concludes our chance meeting that was never intended to be anything more.