Page 30 of Beaches, Bagels & Babes

Worry surged inside Candace as she scrambled to lock up and chased after Daisy.

Her partner did not head to the little back lot where their vehicles waited, but instead, looped around to the boardwalk ramp.

She walked so fast, she might as well have been jogging.

Candace had to dodge around a pair of wobbling boomers to keep sight of her.

There were not too many stragglers out this late.

Technically, the boardwalk was open 24 hours, but Wonderwood’s nightlife was more dive bars than hopping clubs.

The people they passed were either too drunk or tired to pay them much mind.

Which, thankfully, meant no one noticed as Daisy hopped the boardwalk railing down to the off-limits beach below .

Candace followed. Sand kicked up with their fast movements, stinging her like daggers wherever it hit exposed skin.

She tried calling out, but Daisy did not stop until they reached the shoreline.

With the icy waves lapping at their sandaled feet, they stood side-by-side facing the pitch black ocean span.

“Daisy,” she started carefully. “We can talk about it, if that would help. I know what it’s like to—”

“ You don’t!”

Daisy’s shout was swallowed up by the crashing waves, carried deep into the Atlantic’s churning depths. Then, the ocean’s pull dredged it back up. Her pain, the guilt she bore, came rushing to the surface.

“You don’t know the whole story. No one does.”

“Tell me, then. Please.”

Daisy let loose a breath that rattled her whole body. Her voice was a quiet rush as she went on, talking to the watery void.

“The day they died, I was supposed to pick up ingredients at the corner store on my way home from school. I didn’t.

I got caught up working on some stupid art project, and by the time I got there, Mr. Grant had closed.

Couldn’t have been more than ten minutes.

He’d changed from his summer hours, something that happened every year, but I forgot.

So, my parents had to drive off-island to the all-hours big-box store.

I offered to go, but they were worried since it was raining and I’d just gotten my license.

They were worried about me , but they were the ones who—”

As Daisy choked on the next word, Candace placed a featherlight hand on her shoulder. Daisy did not shrug the contact away. She concluded, “It’s my fault they were out that night. It’s my fault they’re gone. I ruined everything.”

“Oh, Daisy… That’s not right. It was an accident. You didn’t ruin anything.”

“I did. And now I’m stuck here, living out their dream.

I hate it. I hate myself for hating it even more.

And I hate you most of all for waltzing in, all perfect and put together, making me think things could be different.

My parents are gone. Nothing we do will ever make this place what they thought it could be. ”

“Whoever said we had to?”

“What…?”

Daisy’s expression was difficult to read in the muted moonlight. Even so, Candace could not help smiling at the slack jaw she knew the woman wore.

“Who said you had to make it what they wanted? It’s yours now, so you do what you want with it.”

“You’re oversimplifying things.”

“And you’ve complicated things so much you convinced yourself you hate it when I know that couldn’t be further from the truth.”

“Typical,” Daisy spat. “You would be the type to tell someone else what their feelings are.”

“I won’t ever tell you how to feel. But hate is a strong word, and I don’t believe you mean it.”

Beneath Candace’s hand, Daisy’s bicep flexed with her clenched fist. Still, she did not move away.

“The little girl dancing in that commercial,” Candace told her, “the one I met who was so proud of her new peanut butter bombs… the one who poured her heart and soul these last few weeks into renovating the whole cafe… I’ve seen real, repugnant hate, and none of that seems like it to me.

Burnt out, maybe. Resentful. But I know you love what you do.

I think you just need to not feel like it’s the only thing you do. ”

Daisy sucked in a sharp breath as if Candace’s words dealt a physical blow. Candace’s heart broke for her, but it needed to be said. The truths people actively denied themselves were the most painful, she knew.

“You’re allowed to live for more than bagels, Daisy. You’re allowed to live for yourself and pursue what you want. There’s nothing to feel guilty about.”

Despite Daisy’s tense posture, she had not shrugged herself free from Candace’s hold. She did not stop that same hand from moving to brush away the tears that had started to streak her cheeks.

Daisy let loose another hitched breath. In a voice that was barely audible over the wind and waves, she admitted, “I don’t know how to stop feeling this way.

Part of me has always resented how my parents leaned on me, even when I was too young.

But they’re also some of my most cherished memories.

I remember when we made that commercial.

It was such a long day, but we had so much fun and we were so happy… How could I forget?”

“You’ve been hurting this whole time. It’s easy to forget things when you’re in pain.”

As Candace finished her tear-gathering, she stroked a lock of hair that escaped Daisy’s bandana back into place. It could have been her imagination, but the woman seemed to lean into the touch even as it drew away.

Candace admitted, “You know, I feel like I ruin things, too. They told me I wasn’t cut out for ‘serious” work, and made me feel so guilty for not appreciating the easy life I could have if I just married some rich asshole.

I ignored them, I kept on pushing, until I ran face-first into a wall.

But, just because I hit one wall, doesn’t mean I won’t go through the next one. ”

Daisy made a thoughtful sound, almost like a hum.

“For me, I think the pressure got to be too much and I just… gave up. I’m not even sure when I stopped believing I could do more. I accepted this was how things were, and there was no point in hoping for more. My life was only going to get worse.”

Candace promised Daisy and herself, “It doesn’t have to.”

“No. Maybe not. Ever since you came back to Wonderwood, you’ve been making me think that. Pushing me.”

Guilt bubbled inside Candace. “I don’t mean to force you, Daisy. I know I can be a steamroller, but I swear, if you want me to stop, just say it and I’ll leave you alone. I—”

“Don’t go.”

There was a definitiveness to the words that set Candace’s heart pounding.

A wrenching, pleading needfulness, too. The hands that moved to grip her sides and turned them chest to chest were steady, somehow, despite their trembling.

Slowly, as if one wrong move would scare the woman away, Candace looped her arms around Daisy.

“That settles it, then. Hate me, but I’m here to stay as long as you want.”

A hot puff of breath scorched Candace’s neck as Daisy agreed, “Hate… is a strong word.”