Page 49 of Anti-Hero (Kensingtons: The Next Generation #2)

T here’s a fashionably dressed, fast-asleep woman slumped next to the front door of Kit’s penthouse when I arrive home after work.

Next to the door of our penthouse, I guess, since we officially moved the last of my stuff over here last night.

The stack of my belongings takes up approximately one-tenth of the space in the guest room that’s going to become the nursery.

I donated or left all my furniture since Kit’s place is fully furnished.

The biggest item I brought was my keyboard.

I crouch down on the carpet next to Lili, resting a hand on the rug so I don’t accidentally topple over. “Hey.”

Lili groans, blinks, then rolls her head this way. Her eyes flutter open a few seconds later. “Hi.” She yawns, raising a hand to cover her mouth. “Welcome home.”

“You too. You didn’t tell me you were coming back.”

“Well, you didn’t tell me you were having a baby with my brother, so I think we’re even.”

I exhale. “Right.”

Lili opens her Birkin and pulls out a bottle. “I brought sparkling cider to celebrate.”

I smile.

“Although I might need to drink something stronger if we’re going to delve into certain details. All I know is what I overheard of my dad’s screaming match with Kit.”

I frown. “Kit and your dad were screaming at each other?”

Kit told me he went over to his parents’ to talk to his dad. And that he told his mom about the baby. And Lili since she was there. There was no mention of any yelling in his recap.

“Yeah. But don’t worry. Mom and I peeped on them hugging it out on the sidewalk after. They both have quick rebound rates. Although …” Lili tilts her head. “I’d never seen Kit that mad— really mad—before. So, that was interesting.”

I bite my bottom lip hard. “Do your parents hate me?”

“ Hate you? Why?”

“I mean, are they mad about the pregnancy?”

Lili doesn’t reply right away, which rachets up my anxiety.

“Are they mad Kit didn’t tell them sooner?

Most definitely. Charlie and I didn’t get much sleep—and not for any fun reasons.

We’re staying in the room next to Dad’s office, and he and Mom had a long, loud conversation after Kit left last night.

But mad about the pregnancy? No. Dad hauled the rocking chair that was in our nurseries down from storage this morning.

Pretty sure he’s planning to bring it over here.

Mom went into work at seven a.m. so she could sketch clothes for a possible children’s line.

They’re excited. Probably still processing—I know I am—but excited. ”

I release a relieved sigh. “Okay. Good.”

“How did your folks take it?”

“Uh … concerned at first. I’d just started working at Kensington Consolidated, so?—”

“You’d just started working at Kensington Consolidated?”

I chew on the inside of my cheek. “Yes.”

“Okay, now I get why Mom and Dad were freaking out so much. You’re pregnant , pregnant.”

I take a seat next to Lili, back against the wall, and unbelt the wrap coat that’s one of the few items of clothing that still fits me. “Twenty-two weeks.”

“Wow.” She’s staring at my bloated stomach.

The structured blazer I’m wearing disguises the curve a little bit, but the way I’m sitting makes my bump more noticeable. No clothes from my wardrobe, no matter how big or boxy, are going to cover it soon.

“Can I …” Her hand hovers hesitantly, which is rare for Lili. A reassuring reminder that this is as new for her as it is for me.

“Yeah. Of course. Here.” I open my blazer and unbutton the bottom few buttons of the blouse I’m wearing under it. “You might feel a kick. Eggplant tends to be more active at night.”

“Eggplant?” she questions.

“Yeah. We decided to keep the gender a surprise, so we refer to the baby in food terms. Last week, it was a cantaloupe.”

Gently, Lili places her palm against my bump. “Wow,” she whispers again, rubbing her hand in a small circle.

“Right?” I whisper back. “It’s pretty cool. Crazy and scary sometimes, but also cool.”

Lili withdraws her hand, and I tug my shirt back down.

“So, how’d you and Kit wind up …”

I glance at the penthouse door. “The hard liquor’s inside.”

Lili laughs, then sighs. “I’m too exhausted to move right now. Jet lag isn’t always a choice. Just tell me.”

“ You’re tired? I’m the one with an eggplant in my uterus.”

“Yeah, and how’d it get there?” She lifts an eyebrow.

“Tequila.”

“You were drunk?”

I chew on the inside of my cheek. Lili and I have shared stories about guys before, but this is different. This is her brother.

“Drunk? No. Tipsy? Yes.”

“You’d been tipsy around Kit before, and I didn’t wind up an aunt.”

I smile, then shrug a shoulder. “I’d just moved to a new city.

Everything with Isaac was still fresh. I know you’re supposed to blame the cheater, not question what’s wrong with you, but I hadn’t felt wanted in a while.

We were at the same party at the end of the summer.

It just … happened. I only expected it to be one night, and it was. Then I wound up as his assistant.”

“In my defense, you’d always ignored Kit. I had no idea you’d?—”

“I know you didn’t. And I probably should have turned the job down after what happened, but I’m glad that I didn’t. I found out I was pregnant a couple of weeks later. Anyway, you know the rest. ”

“Actually, I don’t. You’re living here?” She waves a hand toward the wall we’re leaning against. “And is that a convenience thing, or are you together?”

“My old apartment was in Brooklyn. It made sense for me to move closer.”

“So, you guys aren’t together?”

I fiddle with a button. “I’m not sure what we are.

I don’t want him to feel trapped. I know he chose to be involved, but he didn’t choose this pregnancy.

And I don’t want him to think he has to commit to me to prove he’s ready for this responsibility or to be a good father.

Or to confuse lust with other feelings because we’re going through this experience together. ”

Rather than look sympathetic, Lili laughs. “Are you serious?”

“ Yes ,” I reply, a little affronted by her amusement. That was all honest.

“Kit has had ‘other feelings’ for you since he was sixteen, Collins. It doesn’t have anything to do with you being pregnant.

” She crosses her ankles. “Okay, I went to Kit’s office at lunchtime.

He was in a meeting, so I talked his new assistant into letting me into his office.

I was going to nap on the couch but decided to relax in his chair instead.

You should have seen the look on Kit’s face when he walked in and saw me sitting there.

” She giggles. “Anyway, you never looked at the photo he keeps on his desk next to his computer?”

I shake my head. “No. I would just stack papers on his desk. I never went behind it.”

“Well, that makes me feel better because it crossed my mind that maybe you guys used to do stuff in his chair, back when you worked there, after I already sat down in it.”

I make a face. “Lili. ”

“That wasn’t my point. The point is, it’s from my graduation party. Me and him and Bash and Flynn.” She unlocks her phone and hands it to me. “And you.”

I stare at the screen. I have a vague recollection of taking pictures at Lili’s graduation party—there was a professional photographer in attendance—but I never saw any of the shots.

“Kit has this on his desk?”

Lili nods. “It was there the first time I visited him. Before you started working for him.”

Before he knew I was pregnant, she means.

“You know, Kit called me twice as much freshman year as he did the rest of college, and it wasn’t because he missed me more at first. The only time he voluntarily helped me move was when I was leaving Montgomery Hall.

The only Red, White, and Blue party he didn’t immediately disappear from was the year you came.

Kit’s blunt, Collins, and you know that.

He’s always acted differently around you, but I don’t think I realized how serious he was about you until last night.

Dad’s his hero, and Charlie said he’d been yelling for a while before Mom and I got home.

That should tell you everything you need to know.

” She yawns. “Okay. I’ve gotta go before I fall asleep again. ”

I start to stand as Lili does.

“Careful,” she says, steadying me before reaching down for the cider. She hands the bottle to me with a broad smile. “Congratulations.”

I smile. “Thanks.”

We hug, and it feels different from all the times before. When I was randomly assigned to room with Lili Kensington, I wasn’t sure we’d wind up as friends. I never could have predicted we’d end up here . Family .

“I’ll see you next weekend,” she says as she releases me.

“Next weekend?” I question. “What’s next weekend?”

“Dinner at my parents’. They wanted to have you and Kit over this weekend, but he was very insistent you guys had plans that couldn’t be changed?” Lili arches an eyebrow.

For a moment, my mind is blank. And then I realize … this is the first weekend I don’t work for him.

“Oh. Right. Yeah, we’re, uh, busy.”

I think I’m blushing, which Lili confirms when she smirks.

“You’re good for him, Collins. And I think he’s good for you.” She pats my belly. “I can’t wait to get back to London. There’s this store on Bond Street with the cutest baby clothes, and I’ve been dying to shop there.”

I watch Lili bustle down the hallway, whistling merrily as she steps into the elevator. She waves, then yawns before the doors close.

Stepping into the penthouse is strange. I’ve never been here alone before.

Kit texted me earlier, letting me know he got pulled into a project at work and wouldn’t be home until late. I was disappointed earlier. But now it’s nice, having some time alone to think about what Lili said.

I think part of me has been using this pregnancy as an excuse. Allowing it to tether me to Kit without having to fully commit. Using reasoning like he should be near the baby to justify my sleeping in the same bed or agreeing to move in with him.

But the baby isn’t here yet. He or she won’t be here for months. I keep choosing to be around Kit because I want to be around him.

And Kit deserves to know that.

Excitement wars with nerves as I head into the bedroom. I undress and toss my clothes into the hamper, then head into the bathroom .

The shower connected to the primary suite might be my favorite part of Kit’s penthouse, second only to the piano.

It’s huge and decadent, approximately the same size as my entire former bathroom.

I stand under the steaming spray, letting the water pound my scalp and shoulders, wondering what I should say when Kit gets home.

I’m used to him being the instigator.

He’s hit on me dozens of times. Surely, I can initiate things once ?

I suds my hair, watching the white lather slide down the drain.

It’s just Kit . A thought that used to provide reassurance and incite easy dismissal weighs a lot more than it used to. It sounds important— he’s important.

And I’m scared.

But it’s not fair to expect him to keep being the one who puts himself out there first. If I were him, I would have given up on me a long time ago.

Time to show him that wasn’t a mistake.