Page 114 of Angels & Whiskey

I crossed my arms over my chest. “You’ve had two weeks to tell me.”

He leaned back against the kitchen counter. “I need to tell you why I became an escort and maybe you’ll understand my hesitation to tell you.”

“Okay, tell me.”

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I’ve been in love once before, and she died in my arms.”

My eyes widened. “How?” I whispered.

“She was a medic in my platoon. Just like most days, we got a call to pick up a wounded soldier, but when we arrived we were ambushed and she took a bullet in the chest. As she lay in my arms dying, something changed. I didn’t think my heart could ever love again—I never wanted to love again. But you’ve stolen my way to breathe, angel.” He took the few steps to where I stood and reached his hand up to cup my cheek. I wanted to lean into it because his touch always made me feel safe, but instead, I stood there, peering into his green eyes and trying not to be inconsiderate. “I’ve gone on dates and I only see you. I don’t need to fill a void with other women or a bottle of whiskey anymore. I just want you. Nothing compares to you.”

“Why become an escort? Why not do something with your skills from the army or become a personal trainer?”

“Money. Paul. Not wanting to open up to anyone. I still had needs and it was the easiest way to satisfy them. And I got paid for it.”

“I was lied to for four years, Gabe. How can I trust you?”

“I’m not him. I’ll never be him.”

“But how can I be certain?”

“When you’ve been to war, you tend to not take things for granted.”

His words hit me like a ton of bricks. I’d heard those words before.

“What?” Gabe asked.

“Rich told me the same thing once. I have to go, Gabe. I need time to think. This is all too much.”

“Autumn, wait!”

I didn’t wait.

I needed air and I needed to be alone—away from everyone.

Without saying a word, I grabbed my purse, ran out the front door to my car and quickly drove away as Gabe stood on the curb begging me to stay.

The moment I pulled away, it felt as if I’d left my heart on the sidewalk with Gabe. Tears started to roll down my cheeks and I realized I’d had too many shots and shouldn’t be driving. Instead of going left to leave to the main road, I went right and parked on the street. Cutting the engine, I leaned back against the headrest, closed my eyes and sobbed.

What was wrong with me? Why did I attract liars? Gabe’s lie was only about his job. Was him getting paid to date a big deal? It was a known fact that escorts had sex with their clients, and the thought of how many women Gabe had been with had me feeling as if sex wasn’t special to him. I’d spent too many years being forced to have sex with Rich. I wanted sex to be special.

My phone buzzed in my purse.

Brandi:Are you okay? Where’d you go?

Me:I’m fine. Just give me a few minutes.

His words rang in my head.“Angel, I quit because of you.”He’d quit to be with me. We’d only known each other a couple of months, yet he’d quit his job to be with me. My heart swelled and ached at the realization. He wanted to be with me and knew that escorting wouldn’t allow that to happen.

“I’ve been in love once before, and she died in my arms.”

As I thought of everything he said, it dawned on me that he said he was in lovebefore. What did he mean by before? Before me?

“… I don’t need to fill a void with other women or a bottle of whiskey anymore. I just want you.”

After replaying his words over and over in my head, I wiped my tears and drove backhomerealizing that I’d only left because Icouldleave. Rich would never have let me drive off without coming after me and punishing me. Gabe, on the other hand, had let me leave.

I parked in my usual spot in front of the house, then checked to make sure no mascara was running down my face in the mirror before I got out of the car and walked into the house. I spotted Brandi and Paul sitting on the couch, watching TV on opposite sides. When they noticed me, they both looked up and gave me a tight smile. At Blue Martini I thought something was going on with the two of them, but seeing them now, changed my mind. Brandi was telling the truth; she and Paul were just friends. In my gut I knew she’d never cheat on Todd and I shouldn’t have doubted her. Paul was a great guy and friend.