Page 26

I ron stood before Anna’s bathroom mirror, tracking the rivulets of water dripping off his beard onto his bare chest. The droplets peppered their points home every time he splashed his face with another frigid dose of the stuff.

He finally had his fire back and had swept up Anna as his full soul bond in the process. Strange. He thought it would feel far different somehow, to share not only his strength with another person but his innate celestial makeup as well. He didn’t know what to expect, really, but nothing short of a full-on Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade seemed appropriate, complete with nationwide marching bands and Broadway performances. After all, when one had been on the hunt for solutions to literal world-ending problems for longer than mortals had a metric to measure it, you kind of expected to feel . . . something . At the very least, a sense of relief or achievement.

Instead, all he felt was . . . complete but not the satisfying sort. Not the kind of completion one enjoyed after ticking off tasks on a list or finding the right food storage container lid to go with its mate. No, this completion was more finite, more absolute.

It was the end to a soul’s endless search and the eternal rest of a restless power long starved.

Anna.

Iron shut off the faucet, wiped any lingering chill from his skin lest it travel to hers, and hurried back to his mate.

Fuck, his mate . His soul bond. There was a ring to it that, for so long, he’d only associated with others, but now that phrase held a weight that made him rethink his allegiances or, at the very least, reprioritize the hell out of them. She’d set him free, released his full fire. How, by the eternal wisdom of the prime mages, was he supposed to still go to work and do his fucking job like his world didn’t now hang on whatever the woman in that bed needed?

It was a unique kind of cruelness, to finally know such a connection and freedom, only to have it placed on hold while you went off to fight the good fight no mortal would even know whether you won or lost.

Glory had never been the endgame, but Iron was beginning to wonder whether the duty he’d pledged his life to had been misplaced.

Iron turned the corner and was about to enter the bedroom when Anna’s serene form slowed his momentum, yanking him to a halt. He leaned his shoulder against the doorframe and smiled, marveling at the voracious creature who’d trapped him in her bed and kept him there for the better part of the afternoon.

Half-draped in the comforter, with a lone foot peeking out at the base of the bed, Anna looked like she’d wrestled with an alligator and had not only won the match but convinced the creature to gleefully turn its hide into a pair of boots for the privilege of worshipping at her feet. Half of her long copper hair coiled around her outstretched forearm, while the other half sprawled across the pillow he’d just been using. Her bare shoulders and flushed complexion still bore the markings of their recent exertions. And though he was man enough to acknowledge that her mesmerizing glow could have been attributed to her pregnancy as much as his rather thorough attentions, he couldn’t be mad at it. She was a vision of the dreams he never wanted to stop having and the desires he’d been too afraid to voice.

But what he could be mad at was the disturbed furrow between her brow and the faraway look in her eyes that had her ten seconds away from mindlessly twisting the ends of her hair into snarls.

She looked lost, like a wandering listless thing, and his heart seized at the sight, worried about how far her mind might wander away from him.

“You can’t do that,” he said, hoping to penetrate her deep thoughts.

Focus sharpened her eyes, dragging them away from wherever she’d gone. “Do what?”

“Go places I can’t follow you.”

That serene smile returned to her lips, the one he’d coaxed out of her earlier when he kissed the space between every single one of her vertebrae before entering her again. It was one of many memories that would color the remainder of his days when the darkness became impenetrable.

She lifted the covers aside, treating him to all that luscious bare skin, and welcomed him to join her again.

That intoxicating woman could teach courses on how to convince mountains to move and make a killing by upselling her methods for getting stubborn horses to drink as well. Before she took her next breath, Iron was beneath the covers and had her against him, with his forearms bracketing her ribs and snuggled beneath her breasts.

It had quickly become his favorite position.

Anna sighed and ran the pad of her finger over the swirl of glowing gold on the inside of her wrist that was only visible when she held it out to the sunlight streaming in from the window. His heart still kicked up at the sight of it.

“What was it again? Your celestial name?”

“Daegan.”

“Daegan,” she repeated. “I like it. It suits you.”

“It suits a ghost. I haven’t been called that in quite some time. Not sure I could even respond to it anymore.”

Anna’s touch slowed, then her palm covered the tattoo entirely. “You don’t like it?”

“No, it’s not that.” He grabbed her hand, turned it over, and kissed his apology along the pad of her palm. “Just reminds me of things I’d rather not think about at times. But not you. Never you. I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind since you stole my sleep that first night.” Then he nipped at the flesh there, forcing her fingers to curl around his jaw just the way he liked. “Little thief that you are.”

It was true, all of it, and that shocked him as much as it soothed him.

Anna indulged him with a loving caress down his beard, and damn if he didn’t have a new appreciation for that tail-wagging shit dogs always did to get their humans to pet them. “Does it have something to do with why you always wear these?” She took her hand back and tapped out an entreaty along the leather of his bracers.

Perhaps it was the soft sadness in her voice or the way he despised how he’d made her feel like she needed to walk on eggshells around him. Whatever it was, he didn’t want it to linger in these few moments of bliss, tainting the happiness they’d both finally found.

Iron shifted Anna slightly so he could have full use of his arms. Then, crosshatch by crosshatch, he unstrung the leather cords that fastened his cuffs and covered skin no mortal had ever seen.

When he peeled them off, he was beyond grateful Anna didn’t gasp or make some exclamation over the state of his wrists. He’d never been one for pity and wouldn’t know what to do with it if someone were to fling it at him.

Anna’s care and compassion, however, was an entirely different brand of emotional weapon, one he had no way to prepare against. She didn’t move, didn’t squirm, didn’t try to lift his arms closer for her inspection. She didn’t try to run her gentle fingers over the mangled skin or, mages help him, kiss away whatever hurt she perceived to be there.

Instead, she stayed quiet, waiting for him to explain a set of circumstances no one outside of his brothers knew about.

And he’d give her what she wanted. He knew now he always would.

“Centuries ago, I loved a mortal woman.” He tested the weight of the words on the air, half convinced they’d turn into spears that Anna would want to heave right back at him. When that didn’t happen and his soul bond just lay in his arms, patiently listening, if not slightly more tense, he tossed the rest of his reservations aside and continued removing the stones that he’d piled up around his past.

“Her name was Abigail, and she lived in a village not too far from here. She was a horsewoman and worked with her father and brothers to breed the beasts and sell them to the highest bidder. Her family was well known for being the best of what they offered but also for being equally aloof. Abigail never ventured into town much or had many friends. But she always had her horses. Looking back on it, that should have told me all I needed to know about her. She had a thing for beasts, and at the time, I had a thing for raven-haired beauties.”

“Well, who would blame you?” Anna offered in her achingly helpful way.

“Shhh,” he said against her forehead, brushing a kiss along her hairline. “There’s no need for that. Save your sweetness. It was a long time ago.” Before she could argue, he grabbed her hand and began stroking his celestial symbol on the inside of her wrist, offering up the only distraction he could think of that would help him get through what he’d promised himself he’d share with her.

“Abigail saw me as the mountain of brawn I was and had no problem getting her fill from a dangerous man. The charmers had only recently begun to settle into the colony that would eventually become New Hampshire, and there was an air of disquiet among the people. No one ever really knew who was friend or foe, and as Abigail and her family did business with everyone, she wasn’t quite so discerning when it came to her lovers. She was greedy and liked her sex flavored with all the roughness she expected to come with bedding a brute of my size. She’d never had an interest in slow passion or furtive caresses. Her only interest was in my strength and my cock and how I could use both to thrill and excite her.”

“That doesn’t sound like you at all.”

“Again, it was a different time, and I was a different person. More bloodthirsty, more desperate to slay charmers so I might move on to hunting for what I really craved: my fire and my home. I am . . . not that man anymore. But back then, I thought I’d come to love Abigail, that she would ultimately be my soul bond, the one who would set my fire free and deliver to me my full powers. You have to understand, my brothers and I didn’t know then all that we know now about the bond. I was unaware of how the progression of intimate connections worked and how our twin sparks spoke to each other, only that they must surely exist and make themselves known at some point. Despite our many physical encounters with no signals revealing themselves, I was still convinced Abigail was my mate and that it would just take time for things to be realized.”

Iron swallowed hard and gripped Anna tighter. “The area where her village was located is where the old Chlor-Chem Labs site is now.”

Anna turned her head toward him. “Isn’t that place a Superfund redevelopment project? I always got the impression it was all contaminated land at this point.”

“It is, and because of its lack of mortal interference over the last several decades, it’s one of the locations Cyro used as a base of operations. It was where Rhode was being held captive before we got him out of there.”

Anna burrowed farther against him. “That’s awful.”

“It was just one of the many atrocities Cyro had a hand in at that location.” He forced himself to look at the puckered skin snaking over his wristbone. “One winter night, the charmers had grown particularly bold. They raided Abigail’s village, slashing the throats of every mortal they could find just to watch each soul’s light bleed slowly from their necks. Every soul snuffed out by a charmer is robbed of its opportunity to return its spark to the Eternal Flame, weakening the power of the Empyrean. It’s our great plight and what my brothers and I have fought to prevent for so long. I thought I was in love with Abigail, that our souls’ sparks would eventually find each other, giving me my full power along with my soul bond. When the raid started, I was screaming her name, searching frantically for her. And then I found her, clutched against the chest of an apex who had its bone knife to her throat.”

Anna inhaled softly. “You don’t have to say anything more. I can imagine what?—”

“No, you can’t,” he growled, hissing at the memory as much as his former self. “I couldn’t reach her in time. My fire had already been drained in the earlier fighting. The bastard knew this. I flew toward him anyway, my flaming ax held high, but he was quicker. The knife he slid across her throat just finished its arc as my weapon came down on his shoulder, cleaving his arm from his body.”

“Oh, god.”

“All three of us hit the ground at the same time. I scrambled for Abigail, screaming as her soul’s light left her body and was slowly released into the smoky air above. I waited for it to come and find me, certain that my soul’s own light would finally be revealed and join with hers so I might save her. But her light never reached for mine, never even attempted to make a connection. It was then I realized that she’d never been my soul bond, despite the trust and love I’d shown her.” Iron expected the anguish to pinch his vocal cords the way it always did whenever he thought of Abigail, but this time, the tension didn’t come. Without that roadblock, he no longer had an excuse to bow out of shining a light on the ball and chain of his consequences.

“I was careless to assume the apex had promptly perished after my ax had struck him. Oh, don’t get me wrong, he was well on his way to dying. My fire was doing its thing but nowhere near fast enough, and amid my grief, I didn’t check on the bastard’s progress. That was when the apex lifted its other hand and held out a glowing orb I hadn’t seen before. Later, I learned it contained all sorts of nasty dark magic laced with acid and mages knew what. It exploded in my face. I threw my hands up and punched out my fire, but I wasn’t fast enough to block all of the spray. My gloved hands were spared, but my wrists and lower forearms weren’t. That shit coated my skin and would have eaten through my flesh entirely if Chrome hadn’t been nearby, healing me as best he could with his power. Likewise, when the blast hit, my fire mingled with the dark magic, temporarily blinding me in one eye. I eventually regained my full vision, but the jumble of colors in that eye remained.”

Anna’s warm arms wrapped around his ribs. “I’m sorry you had to go through that. I know it’s a stupid thing to do to apologize for something you had no part in, but it’s all I can think to say. I’m so sorry, Iron.”

He hugged her back, letting the feel of her soft skin drag him away from terrors that had dug their claws into him for far too long. “After Abigail, a lot of things I had always believed as truth started looking a little grimier. I didn’t care how I killed, so long as I took down every single fucking charmer within sniffing distance. I realigned myself with my purpose, turning far more ruthless than any of my brothers thought healthy. I craved the routine and became a devoted student of it. A killer without a conscience. I focused on my duty to the celestial mages, rather than any trust I might have still had in them. I let that be my guide.”

Iron breathed deeply, holding hard to Anna’s sweet scent. “It took me a long time to realize I had no true love for Abigail, nor she for me, but she still didn’t deserve to die the way she had. For centuries, I thought the fault lay in her and her sex. That there was something innately untrustworthy about women and their judgment, that perhaps they were just like the celestial mages. Creatures I should have a duty toward, but nothing further.”

“Not all women are bad, just like not all men are. And believe me, it took a hell of a lot of bottomless bowls of M&Ms for me to get to a point where I could admit that and believe it.”

He chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “I know that now. You’ve helped me realize that my concerns with trust stem from issues with my own judgment, not the judgment of others.”

“But you trust your family, your brothers, right?”

“With my life.”

“Let me ask you a question,” Anna said, shifting slightly so she could look at him. “If you could do anything in the world that would bring you joy, what would it be? And no , don’t give me that look. For the purposes of this conversation, I’m taking myself off the table. I mean for you , Iron. What would make you happy if Cyro wasn’t a factor and you weren’t beholden to anyone? What would Iron want for Iron’s sake?”

“No one’s ever asked me that before.”

“Well, I’m not no one, and I’m asking. What would you want?”

He thought for a minute, then moved his hand lower, cupping the rounded softness of her lower belly. “This,” he breathed. “I want this.”

His answer flew across the small bedroom, lighting up every corner until there was no place for his deepest desires to hide. “I want a home. A true home. With space for all of us, my brothers, their mates, you and your baby. Everyone. I want to see your child born and cared for. I want to give you a family and have that baby passed around from uncle to uncle while I take care of you properly. I want to have so many damn buildings, we’d need our own zip code. As we are, half of us are scattered. Our den is underground, but we’re all over the place. Bridget and Steel are in Boston once a month, Rose and Tammy have their apartment with all their shit still there, and Clara and Bronze spend most of their time in lycan territory. We’re about as far-flung as possible, to the point that I doubt we could even call ourselves a real family anymore.” Iron sat up and gripped the side of Anna’s face. “I want a home, and I want you and your baby in it.”

Anna’s eyes turned liquid as she gripped his wrist, the one part of him he never let another soul touch. “I want that, too.”

Iron kissed her, fiercely, furiously. He kissed her with a punishing precision that had erupted inside him from the single spark of her curiosity. Home . He’d never allowed himself to dream of it before.

And as Anna parted her legs and welcomed him into the warmth of her body, a new unshakable truth emboldened his frame, filling his muscles with a conviction there was no going back from.

He would give Anna and his family a proper home, even if it meant he’d never get to see it.