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CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

F ERON KNEW ENOUGH TO GET ME in a room far away from the others. He sealed the doorway with a single touch, the live wood snapping together, sealing me in with him and the rest of the Elders.

I turned to Syrra and Myrrah. “You put the life of a child on the line before a seasoned warrior?”

Syrra’s arms crossed, strong and tight like a shield held between me and them. “You said you would respect the council’s decision. You made this request of us.”

I gritted my teeth. “Had I known you would send a girl of barely seventeen to the front lines, perhaps I would not have made such a foolish choice.” My breath seared my nostrils. I turned to Myrrah. “Have you not sent enough children to their deaths? You need to send one more?”

Feron raised his hand and the floor underneath me popped upward, knocking me to the ground. “That is enough.” His eyes glowed bright lilac, boring down on me like sails on a ship, anchoring me through the swells of my rage. “We weighed this decision for days , Keera, and none of us are strangers to the plights of war. Our concerns were greater than just the battles to come.”

Darythir signed something with one hand, slow enough for me to make some sense of it.

“Gerarda is a brilliant soldier,” I spat. “She would have made a fearsome Fae.”

Darythir shook her head, her hands waving at her sides, wordless.

“She would have been a powerful weapon.” Syrra kneeled in front of me. “But we interviewed each candidate thoroughly. Do you know what Gerarda said when we asked how she envisioned her life as a Fae after the battle was won?”

I leaned back against the wall and shrugged. Gerarda’s mind had always been a mystery to me. One she revealed slowly and at her leisure.

Syrra swallowed as the scars of branches along her shoulders tensed, the leaves almost fluttering. “She said she could not conceive of a life after the war. That her only focus was defeating the Crown.”

I lifted my chin. “I wouldn’t have expected any less from her.”

Myrrah pushed her chair beside Syrra. “Aemon forged us into weapons with no regard for who we would be when his battles were won. With no care if we rusted, if we dented, if we were left discarded on the field of battle. All he wanted was us to be sharp and at the ready. How could I ever agree to change someone in such a powerful way—much more powerful than anything Aemon could have devised—when all she can comprehend herself to be is a dagger. What if the after comes and she realizes that she made a rash choice? A choice she regrets and cannot take back?”

I slumped into a chair, the hold of Feron’s stare loosening as my rage faded into the grief. The grief I had for my past and Gerarda’s too.

I ran a hand over the top of my braid, not caring as long strands fell loose around my face. “But you judge Fyrel as strong enough to handle that choice.”

Feron nodded. “The young are more resilient than we give them credit for.”

“And there is no future where Fyrel is not chasing after Gwyn.” Syrra huffed. “At least this way she will have a better chance at protecting herself.”

I scoffed and stood. “Gerarda will appeal your decision.” I turned to Darythir and Feron.

The old Elf signed something quick and short.

“As is her right,” Feron interpreted in a soft voice. “Though our decision will stand.”

I rubbed my neck, my new gift tingling under my skin, knowing it would soon be unleashed again. “When shall we do it then?”

Darythir held one arm across her chest and slowly lifted the other behind it, her fingers curved into the shape of a circle. I didn’t need Feron to interpret.

Sunrise.

“I know you’re there.” My voice grated against my throat. I didn’t turn toward Gerarda as she stepped in front of the wreckage. I had thought abiding by the council’s decision would be easy, but I hadn’t expected them to nominate every Halfling I considered family to fight alongside me. I needed an outlet to let my anger simmer. The grove outside of Aralinth worked well enough.

Gerarda kicked a branch I had set aflame away from my knees.

“Turn me.” She tucked her hands behind her back and kept her eyes focused on the forest above my head. In that moment, she wasn’t my friend or even my adversary—she was a soldier.

Just like the council had said. A weapon too dangerous to sharpen any more than she already was.

I fell back to the ground and pulled my arm around my earth-stained knees. “That decision isn’t mine to make.”

Gerarda’s jaw pulsed. “The decision to shoot lies with the archer and not the bow.”

I huffed a laugh. “Is that how you trained your Shades? That they were making the decisions instead of following your orders, or Hildegard’s orders, or Aemon’s?”

“No.” Her voice was crisp as it sliced through the air. “My job was to strip them of their will, to make it so they wouldn’t have the slightest hesitation at following a command.”

I swallowed, hearing the disgrace Gerarda carried for herself in her voice. Even now the choices we had to make under Aemon’s rule haunted us. “You did your job well.”

She nodded. “I did, but we both know it wasn’t right.” She finally lowered her gaze to me. Her black eyes smoldering with contempt.

I scraped my finger along the dirt, creating a grooved line between us. “It’s not the same.”

“Fuck you saying it’s not.” Gerarda spun on her left toe and began to pace, her rage boiling off her like steam. “And fuck the council for their decision. We both did what needed to be done to survive, to save others from that wretched island. And we succeeded. Why should I be punished for how I endured it?”

I gritted my teeth. “Had the council been given the chance, I doubt they would’ve bestowed these gifts to me either.” My skin tightened at those words, worried that the magic coursing through Elverath had made a mistake in choosing me.

“But that’s exactly my point.” Gerarda ran a hand over her hair. “They didn’t get a vote. You were chosen for this, Keera. The Light Fae chose you to keep their bloodline alive, and then Elverath herself chose you to be the next niinokwenar . I know you balk at the mention of a savior, but this path has been set in front of your feet. Not the council’s.”

I stood with a fiery rage in my chest. “And what would you have me do? Make you a Fae out of spite? This is the Elvish way. This is how decisions are made.”

Gerarda crossed her arms. “The Elvish way died the day the first Halfling was born.” She took a step closer to me. “Tell me you agree with them. Tell me that you think me unfit, and I will never say another word about it.”

I clenched my jaw but did not open my lips.

She smirked. “I knew it. You were just as surprised by their decision as I was.”

“Gerarda, they have lived lifetimes longer than you or I.” I took a deep breath. “Perhaps they know something we do not.”

“And maybe they know nothing!” Her voice cracked and echoed through the trees. Her next words were more controlled, but no less fiery. “The council did not start the rebellion. That was you, Riven, and the Guild. The council did not even join our ranks until the return of their precious magic was threatened. They did not live under Aemon. We did. And we may not have lived through millennia, but none of them have the blood of the dead and the beaten coursing through their veins. Only the Halflings do.”

Tears welled along my eyes. “And what if you’re wrong? What if Elverath uses my gift to curse you for disobeying their ways? You could spend your life as Riven did—or worse.”

Gerarda lifted her chin. “Then so be it. But at least I will live out the last of my days knowing I did everything I could to protect my people, to fight for their freedom, to fight for more than just myself to survive.” She swallowed and her dark eyes bore into mine, unwavering. “After all we have been through together, Keera, you owe me that. Don’t take my chance to do my best from me. Not again.”

A hot tear rolled down Gerarda’s cheek, and she was no longer the seasoned soldier I had come to respect and care for. She was a lost, lonely girl, trying to do everything she could to save her sister.

Fate had taken that from her.

I would not do the same.

“Yes.”

Gerarda fell back onto her heels. “Yes?” The warmth drained from her face as her jaw fell open.

“Having second thoughts, Vallaqar?”

Her black eyes narrowed. “Not at all.”

“Where do you want to do it?”

Gerarda waved her arms across the clearing. “Here is good enough for me.”

“You don’t want to fetch Elaran first?”

Gerarda gulped and she shook her head. “Nothing she would say would change my mind. And I would rather do it before the Elders get suspicious.”

I pulled a faebead from the inner pocket of my vest and cracked it with my boot. A large faelight bloomed beside us, and I threw my cloak over top of it. “Lay down.”

Gerarda undid her weapons belt and set it on the ground. She twisted her hands over and over again before letting her head fall back onto the makeshift bed. “I’m ready,” she said with a nod.

I called my gift forward. Gerarda’s black eyes widened for the last time as mine were lit with an auric glow. I reached out and placed my palm over the width of her forehead.

For a moment, nothing happened, as if Gerarda’s mind was fighting against the magic. But she took a deep breath, and all her defenses dropped. Her body went limp. Then the rush of my magic overwhelmed her, thick ribbons wrapping around her body like a cocoon.

The warmth faded away and I could breathe normally once more. I looked down at Gerarda, and when her eyes opened, they were gleaming orbs of amber.

I took a step back as Gerarda stood. A gasp ripped from my chest. Inky black shadows leaked from her limbs, twirling along the ground like dusty wisps of wind. Tendrils of darkness, just like Riven’s shadows had been.

“Are you in pain?” My voice shook with fear of what I had done to my friend.

Gerarda blinked. “No.” She laughed, a single pure note that sounded more like song than joy. “I feel incredible. Though this is not a new power.”

I shrugged. I didn’t understand the magic any more than she did.

Gerarda fluttered her fingers and strands of shadow shot from her fingertips. I burst into a fit of laughter that didn’t settle until Gerarda hurled a shadow at my face.

“Don’t lose control or you’ll have to train with Riven.”

Gerarda cursed under her breath.