Page 11 of Aftermath #1

11

T o Cam, it felt like forever before Austin came around. And if this was how Cam acted during an anxiety attack, he couldn’t understand how his family—Austin included—handled it. 'Cause seeing Austin so distressed and completely out of it was fucking painful.

He wondered how aware Austin was of his surroundings—if he knew they were on the patio floor. It was when Austin had nearly fallen over that Cam had guided them both down here. Now he was leaning against the back wall of the house, and he had Austin half-lying in front of him, his head on Cam's naked chest. Over and over, Cam murmured words of no significance to Austin, hoping he was listening. They weren't back in hell. They were here. Safe. Together. No one was gonna torture them.

Cam wasn’t sure if he admired Austin or if he was frustrated with him. Even in the middle of panic and anxiety, the man broke down in silence. He was crying, but he didn’t make a sound. His breaths were shallow and rapid, but there was no plea for help.

"You're safe," he whispered and kissed the top of Austin's head. Reaching down, he threaded their fingers together. "If you hear me, can you please give my hand a squeeze or something?" He needed Austin to be all right, for fuck's sake. Now . He had no patience.

It also infuriated him to think that Austin's wife was a goddamn bitch who wouldn’t help. Not that Cam was sure he wanted that, but technically…she should. Yeah, Cam liked the feeling of being helpful—especially with this man—and there was an odd sense of satisfaction from being the one to whom Austin turned. But he hated that Austin didn’t have any other options.

"Thank Christ," Cam mumbled when Austin gave his hand a weak squeeze. Tears continued to soak Cam's chest, but at this point, he was just relieved. Austin evidently needed this, and Cam was determined to be the strong one this time. "I'm here," he murmured, slightly uncomfortable. Not with Austin, per se, but displays of affection weren’t Cam's forte. He wanted strict directions on how to help; now he was doing this blindly, not knowing what worked.

"S-sorry," Austin croaked minutes later.

Cam rolled his eyes, as he didn’t see the big deal. There was no reason to apologize. "Shut the fuck up and cry or whatever." He winced, regretting his wording. "I meant what I said." He cleared his throat. "I'm here—for you. And, um, you don’t have to be so fucking strong all the time." Okay. He exhaled. That was a little better. He hoped. Then he remembered the shrink's words about letting it all out—it was healthy and shit. And Austin had made Cam do that, too. "You're supposed to talk about it," he said quietly. "What were you remembering?" Austin let out a shuddering breath and began to sit up, but Cam didn’t let go. "Fuck that. Stay here." He wrapped his arms around Austin's shoulders. "If not for you, then for me."

Austin seemed relieved as he melted into Cam's arms. He was clearly not used to leaning on others—physically or metaphorically. He didn’t ask for help—goddamn masochist. Then again, was Cam any better? Hell, no.

What a fucking pair they made.

"You got shot…" Austin mumbled, which was all he needed to say for Cam to be clued in on what period of time in captivity he was stuck in. "We were so damn helpless."

Cam pressed down his own anxiety and focused on Austin. That time in the cell had been one of the worst, and Austin was right: they'd been helpless. There had been nothing to do to prevent torture and death. All because of one raging lunatic.

Cam hissed in pain as he finally managed to reach his cot. It had taken a solid hour for him to drag himself a few feet and then pull himself up to the cot. His shoulder was burning, a warm trickle of blood steadily oozing out of the front. Only one trickle, which meant there was no exit wound. The bullet was still lodged inside him.

His eyes stung with sweat and silent tears, and he wished he could at least get rid of the motherfucking handcuffs. But his misery aside, he was also worried about Austin. After the shit they had pulled, he had a feeling Psycho wasn’t gonna go easy on Austin.

"You okay, man?" Chase asked.

"Fuckin' peachy," Cam groaned. Everyone already knew what had happened, but a failed attempt at escaping was quickly becoming old news.

Before long, it was Austin's turn to tumble down the uneven stairs, and Cam held his breath, for unknown reasons visibly upset at the thought of his cellmate being tortured. Annoyed, Cam tried to blink back his tears, but they kept rolling down his cheeks. Fucking pussy. He hated showing weakness.

First, the hatch opened, and Psycho peered inside, spotting Cam on the cot. Then the door was pushed open, and Psycho himself dragged Austin's body inside. He dropped two keys and a larger medical kit on the floor, said, "Patch each other up. I'm not ready for either of you to quit the company yet," and then left.

An iron fist squeezed Cam's heart as he remembered Austin's lifeless body.

He guessed it was the fact that a single man had caused so much pain to ten strong men that made them angry these days. It wasn’t necessarily pride that got wounded; it was disbelief that made him rage. Regardless of the prison-like setting, the handcuffs, the guns, the mind games, and the torture, it was difficult to believe that one man could have so much control.

It seemed to have hit Austin the hardest. The man always needed to be useful, and for some reason he couldn’t see that without him, Cam would definitely be dead. Austin failed to realize just how much he'd helped Cam.

He let out a labored breath and nuzzled Austin's hair. "You always patched me up. Don’t forget that." Not to mention the countless times he'd helped Cam with his anxiety attacks.

"You kept me alive," Austin rasped. "I was too weak."

"You— Christ , Austin. You weren’t weak." Cam pushed down his temper. "Do you even remember how bruised you were?"

Cam sure as fuck did.

Taking off the cuffs was priority number one. Then Cam had woken Austin by splashing water in his face, and Austin had been conscious long enough to croak out where it hurt the most. And, uh, well, it had taken Cam seven tries to put Austin's shoulders back in their sockets. He felt bad, but he wasn’t a fucking doctor.

Anyway, Austin had passed out from the pain, and that brought them to now. Cam was tending to the knife wounds after having stripped Austin of clothes—one pair of shredded sweatpants and one filthy T-shirt. And when he was done with Austin's face, he had to cut up both their T-shirts, 'cause there weren't enough bandages in the medical kit for both of them.

Four wounds needed stitches, so Cam was glad Austin was still passed out on the floor. Without anesthesia or even the weakest painkiller, it was bound to hurt like a bitch. But the most important thing was to close the cuts and make sure everything was as clean as possible. The alcohol he poured probably stung like hell, too.

He made sure to save some for himself, 'cause when Austin was ready, he was gonna have to dig out the bullet in Cam's shoulder.

"What the fuck did he do to you?" Cam whispered, not expecting an answer. He gently swiped a cotton ball soaked in alcohol over the four-inch long cut along Austin's temple, right at his hairline. Butterfly bandages should suffice there.

He noticed that Austin was coming around when he whimpered and a stray tear slid down his temple.

"You're gonna be okay."

"Hurts," Austin choked out, eyes closed.

"I know," Cam murmured thickly. "Can you tell me if anything is broken?"

"I…um. I d-don’t know…"

Cam nodded to himself and resumed his work. With Austin wearing only his black boxer briefs, Cam could see every bit of damage, and Jesus fucking Christ, there was a lot. For the wounds along the man's thighs and calves, he pressed sterile pads directly onto the cuts, and then he tore cotton strips off of the T-shirts to create bandages to tie around Austin's legs.

While Cam tended to Austin's arms, Psycho returned, but before panic could settle in, the men found out he was only down there to "fetch the dead guy." Pete. A rotting corpse. Pete, an innocent man. Whom Psycho had called Dad. Fucking lunatic.

"I need you to wake the fuck up now, Austin," Cam stated. He didn’t understand it, but seeing Austin this way was just wrong. This was the man who'd helped him when Cam was nothing but an asshole. Yeah, so he needed to wake up and be good again. "There's nothing more I can do." He surveyed Austin's body. "I cleaned up the blood, I stitched you up, I-I don’t think, um…I mean, I don’t think there's a big risk of infection. How're your fucking shoulders?"

Austin let out a quiet, pained moan, but that was about it.

"Well, at least you're breathing," Cam muttered, then winced when he accidently moved his bad shoulder. "Goddamn, I could use a drink."

Eyes stinging with unshed tears, Cam tightened his hold on Austin. He shuddered. His hands slid over Austin's exposed skin, encountering too many scars. Some were fading. Some were too deep to ever go away.

In the pocket of his shorts, his phone vibrated, but he ignored it. Before Austin had woken up this morning, someone had been calling Cam's phone multiple times from an unknown number, and he didn’t respond to that shit.

"Are you with me, Austin?" Cam murmured. He hoped he wouldn’t get freaked out whenever Austin grew quiet now.

"Yeah…"

Cam let out a soft breath. "Come on. Let's go inside instead." The sun was at its highest. Even Bourbon had retreated to the shadows on the other side of the pool where he was gnawing on a bone. The high, wooden fence that surrounded the backyard provided seclusion, but unless you were in that pool, it was like a broiling pan in the middle of the day. "We'll talk and rest for a bit, and then we're ordering that pizza." He was gonna make sure Austin pulled through this.

To do that, he swallowed his aversion to his medicine and took a damn pill that made it easier to prevent anxiety attacks.

Austin wasn’t tired; he was utterly drained. It felt like he'd been crying for days and not a couple hours. His voice was hoarse and shook when he spoke. His eyes felt heavy. But Cam kept pushing. Gently. Persistently. He made sure Austin talked about what he was remembering.

"No—open your eyes." Cam kissed him between his eyebrows. "If anything, I need to hear what came next, 'cause I don’t fucking remember."

"You were pretty out of it," Austin mumbled sleepily and pulled the blanket up higher. Before, when they'd made it to bed, Cam had switched on the ceiling fan as well as a table fan that stood on the low wall behind Cam's back. So, the living room was now comfortably cool even though the sun was scorching right outside.

"Keep talking," Cam said, just a hint of irritation in his voice.

Austin's eyes remained closed, but he managed a smile. Cam wouldn’t be Cam if he didn’t get annoyed.

"Nothing much to tell," Austin lied as the memories flooded back.

"Bite down on this." Austin placed a few strips of fabric that he'd twisted together between Cam's teeth. They were both on the floor, Cam's head in Austin's lap, and it was time to take out that damn bullet. Well, Cam insisted it was. Austin was torn.

Austin couldn’t describe his own pain; it was too great, too consuming. He was dizzy with it, and he was fighting against infection. Nevertheless, it had been almost a day now, and Cam was getting worse.

A fever meant that your body was struggling—working to beat a virus…or some foreign object that simply didn’t belong in a man's shoulder. It meant your immune system was functioning. But there was no way of knowing whether you'd be able to win or lose. In Cam's case, Austin was worried. Not because he had a fever, but because he complained over the cold—when in reality, it was still humid and hot down here. Cam's teeth were chattering, which meant there was a long way to go.

Austin remembered one time Riley had been down with the flu. After a couple days, she'd begun to sweat profusely, and she had hated it—said it was icky and gross. But Austin's mother had explained to her it was a good thing: Riley's little body had beat the infection, and she'd be back to normal in no time.

Unless Cam's fever went down soon, there was a big risk his body would cave from fatigue and shut down. Though, this was only if there was, in fact, an infection. For all Austin knew, Cam's fever could be caused by the bullet wound itself.

"You sure about this?" Austin asked for the hundredth time as he pulled out a pair of pad-tipped tweezers. "If there's nerve damage or an artery's been hit, there's nothing I can do once the bullet is out." He'd watched enough TV to know that much. "Cam—" he cupped his cheek, forcing him to look Austin in the eye "—do you understand what I'm saying? You can bleed to death."

"My fucking choice," Cam gritted out, the sound muffled by the strip of rope between his teeth. "Get that damn bullet outta me."

Sighing heavily, Austin removed the temporary dressing Cam had applied yesterday. It didn’t bleed too much, and he was glad to see there was neither discoloration nor too much swelling.

"On the count of three," he mumbled, but as he said "one" and listened as Cam released a breath, he gently slid the tweezers inside the wound.

Cam cried out through clenched teeth that clamped down harshly on the fabric in his mouth. Every muscle in his body tensed up. But Austin kept going. Holding Cam still, he continued until the rounded tips of the tool came in contact with something metallic. It was a silent little snick that Austin merely felt through the tweezers.

"Almost, buddy." Austin's brow furrowed in concentration, and he managed to pinch the bullet on his second try. A few beads of sweat trickled down his temples; meanwhile, Cam was shaking and his face was pale.

It was a miracle Cam hadn't gone into shock yesterday, but now Austin feared it was happening right this moment. Smoothly removing the bullet, Austin dropped it on the floor and immediately started to clean up. He spared no alcohol, and he used plenty of antiseptic cream before he sealed the wound with sterile pads and medical tape.

"It's done, Cam," he whispered and removed the makeshift rope from Cam's mouth. "It's all done." The only response he got was a weak nod as Cam's eyes fluttered closed. "No, stay with me." Austin carefully pulled him over to the blanket he'd rolled together earlier to form a long pillow. Because he'd feared this. Austin had feared Cam would either go into shock or bleed out. And if any of that was going to happen, Austin needed to stay close. "Can you open your eyes?" He made sure Cam didn’t put any pressure on his shoulder.

They both lay down on the hard floor, but it was at least warmer than the cots, and Cam needed heat. It was survival instinct that kicked in again, so Austin unceremoniously drew the second blanket over them and scooted close enough for their bodies to touch.

"Look at me." Austin palmed Cam's cheek and gently brushed away some moisture under his eyes. And at last, Cam forced his eyes to open, causing Austin to breathe out in relief. "You're going to be okay. You're not bleeding a lot at all, okay? That’s good news."

"F-fuc-ckin' c-cold," Cam exhaled, his teeth still chattering.

Austin nodded and moved even closer. "We'll get that temperature up in no time, I promise." Truth be told, he knew little to nothing about this. He'd gone hiking a lot with his dad when he was younger, so he knew a thing or two about patching up a wound, but nothing serious. Treating a shock victim…that was for doctors, for Christ's sake.

Wanting Cam to get warmer as quickly as possible, Austin tucked Cam's head under his chin and held him close to his body. In turn, Cam burrowed into Austin's heat and tried to get his muscles to relax. Maybe it was shock; maybe it wasn’t. It could be the fever, but it didn’t really matter when both things required warmth.

Both men were in an indescribable amount of pain, but exhaustion won in the end, and they fell asleep.

"You were so goddamn stubborn about that bullet," Austin croaked.

He blinked back tears, thinking about what-ifs, which was never a good thing. It was the main reason he couldn’t be honest with his parents. Maggie had already lost one son, and every time she saw Austin now, she drove herself to tears with what could've happened. Therefore, he acted as if life was good—or at least better. Good enough.

"I didn’t bleed out," Cam reminded him. "It worked."

"But what if—"

"Stop." Cam grabbed Austin's jaw and planted a firm kiss on his lips. "Don’t think like that." His voice softened, and there was a small smirk in place. "You'll give yourself more grays."

"Piss off." Austin's head dropped to the pillow again, and he ran a hand over his hair— with very few grays in it . "You could let me sleep instead. I'm so fucking tired."

Cam tsked. "Such language for Mr. MBA." His smile touched Austin's forehead. "I distinctly remember a time where you wouldn’t let me sleep."

Oh, Austin remembered, too. He'd never forget. But at least this memory was on the lighter side.

"Drink some more, but do it slowly." Austin held up the tin cup of water to Cam's mouth.

Perhaps a few would think it was an act of kindness when their captor—no, screw that; he was a damn torturer—delivered food to them without demanding they put on their cuffs first. But Austin and Cam didn’t think he had a kind bone in him. He wanted his victims to suffer, which they definitely were, and Austin supposed the asshole also knew what the men could handle. Right now, for instance, it would be nearly impossible to get around if they couldn’t use their hands. So, this was the second day Austin and Cam had received food and water, yet they were allowed to keep what was left of the medical kit, and they didn’t have to restrain themselves.

Cam was recovering at a snail's pace, but at least he could sit up—with help. He was weak, and the fever was still there, though he was more alert.

"I wanna sleep," Cam grumbled.

"Not yet." Austin, who was leaning back against the wall near the toilet—convenience and all—had Cam in front of him, seated on the floor between his legs. It offered Cam more heat, and his back to Austin's chest was a hell of a lot more comfortable than the floor. It had been months of sleeping on hard surfaces; their bodies ached in protest whenever they moved.

"I feel bad for your wife." Cam was bitching again. "You're a fuckin' doctor nazi—lemme sleep."

"She doesn’t act like a child when she's sick," Austin said, but instead of getting annoyed at Cam, there was a small smile in his voice. He was getting used to Cam's behavior. "Come on." He peered over Cam's shoulder and brought the cup closer to his lips. "Drink, buddy."

"And then you'll shut up and let me sleep?"

Austin chuckled. "Yes. I'll shut up and let you sleep."

"Jesus Christ. Fine," Cam muttered. Between a couple slow sips of water, he said, "A good nurse would at least offer a sponge bath."

"You called me a doctor nazi first. Doctors don’t give sponge baths."

Cam huffed and took another sip of water. "Nazi Nurse—that’s your new name."

"You'd use me like that, huh?" Austin cracked a grin as he gently dragged the washcloth over Cam's neck and good shoulder. "While I'd be working my skills, you'd fantasize about supermodels."

Cam hummed quietly, neither confirming nor denying.

"You were a fucking hard-ass," Cam chuckled. "Consider this payback."

"I eventually did let you sleep," Austin pointed out.

"You never gave me a sponge bath."

Austin couldn’t help but laugh. "At least now I know you probably wouldn’t fantasize about supermodels." It felt good to laugh, even if he was tired. While he hated to depend on somebody else, it left him more refreshed. Maybe he'd needed this. It was just so damn liberating.

"Hmmm. No. I can think of something better than skinny women." Cam ran his hand down Austin's back. "Ever thought about wearing heels?"

Austin huffed. "That’s not even a little funny." He opened his eyes to see Cam failing at hiding his amusement. "Come here," he murmured, leaning in for a kiss.

It started light, but Cam had a way of evoking feelings Austin had only thought he was familiar with.

His entire body buzzed with a harsh need to claim.

Ending up on top of Cam, he pushed aside his tiredness for something much more satisfactory. He kissed Cam deeply, the two exploring each other's mouths.

Austin wasn’t sure if he was supposed to be wary of anything. All he knew was that it felt freeing to be with Cam. They grabbed at each other roughly, both fairly dominant, but that didn’t mean Austin was shunning the idea of submitting. He hoped that applied to Cam, too. Because the closer they were, the better it felt. There was no thought about semantics or details—as long as he could ravish and be ravished in return.

"Christ, you're sexy," he muttered as the thought hit him. But it was true. Cam was a fucking vision. So different from what he was used to, yet appealing all the same. Austin was drawn to Cam's masculinity—his swimmer's body, his strength, his damn voice, and his rough-around-the-edges personality.

Austin could let himself be comforted by all that hardness. But at the same time, he was equally attracted to Cam's softer sides. The vulnerability he tried so hard to hide, the insecurities, and the sometimes-awkward fumblings with words. Those were the traits that brought out Austin's inner caveman, for reasons unknown to him.

Feeling Cam's hard cock grinding against his own, he pushed his hips forward and moaned into their sloppy kiss. "I want you." Understatement. He'd wanted more last night, too, but he was slightly self-conscious about the fact that he'd never been with a guy before. He wanted it to be good for Cam, so he'd chickened out when it came to oral sex. But now… "Stand up." Breathing heavily, he rolled away and pointed to the space between the bed and the coffee table.

"I thought you were tired." Cam's voice was thick with lust as he gave Austin a final kiss before complying. In answer, Austin just shook his head—half a lie. He was tired, but not enough to shake off the desire to taste Cam. "Now what?" Cam cocked a brow once he was standing, his hands on his hips, and he was watching Austin with a small dare in his eyes.

Austin just smirked to himself and scooted to the edge of the bed. His feet hit the hardwood floor, one on either side of Cam, and he leaned forward to kiss his thigh. As Cam sucked in a breath, Austin hooked his fingers underneath the waistbands of shorts and boxers, tugged both down Cam's legs, and exposed him fully.

"You don’t have to—" Cam started to say in a rush, but he stopped himself and ran a hand through his hair. "Fuck that. Only an idiot would say no, and I've pictured this too many times. Keep going."

Austin chuckled under his breath and nuzzled the soft skin of Cam's hip. Slowly, he slid his hands up Cam's thighs, refusing to get nervous. A guy didn’t find a blow job bad. There were good ones, great ones, and goddamn glorious ones. Austin knew what he wanted for himself. Not too much teasing—that was just irritating. A lot of suction, wetness, and his balls massaged. He could do that.

Right?

Austin hummed, turned on by the musky scent of Cam's arousal. He was hard, uncut, long, not too thick, and the area around was smoother than he expected. Austin trimmed sometimes, but it wasn’t a habit.

Kissing the root of Cam's cock, he gripped the length of it and stroked slowly but firmly. At the same time, he licked his lips and began to kiss his way to the head. Jesus Christ . He got into it. More than he thought he would. With his lips wrapped around Cam, he took him as deep as he could.

"Fuckin'…oh, fuck ." Cam trembled with a shudder and wove his fingers through Austin's hair. "That’s it—oh, yeah."

Austin closed his eyes and swirled his tongue around the swollen tip, and when he suckled it, he got the first taste of Cam's pre-come. It was salty and smooth on his tongue.

He wasn’t crazy about the taste, but it did excite him more than he could've imagined.

He groaned and took another inch, a bit more than he could really handle, but that didn’t stop him. He sucked hard and made sure to use his tongue a lot. In return, Cam moaned and cursed.

After a few minutes, he began to fuck Austin's mouth, though he did so with caution. Which Austin didn’t like. Moving his free hand to Cam's ass, he silently told him to let go. At least a bit more. Then Austin moved to stick that same hand down his own pants and stroked himself at the same pace he sucked Cam.

With each thrust of Cam's hips, Austin grew more confident. He cupped Cam's balls and tugged when he did the same to himself. He suckled the head of Cam's dick when he smeared a bead of pre-come over his own cock with his thumb. It was one of the most erotic things he'd ever done, including the early years in his marriage when Jade had been more adventurous.

"Oh, Christ," Cam moaned. "Are you jacking—shit, take off your pants. I wanna see you."

Austin backed away enough to push down his sweats and free his cock. He fisted it and stroked it hard, at the same time returning to Cam's dick, which glistened with saliva and arousal. He sucked him in, moaning at how fucking turned on he was, and he only had one goal. To swallow Cam down.

In shallow thrusts, Cam fucked his mouth. "Holy fuck, Austin." He gritted his teeth. "Almost there." It was a warning—a chance for Austin to back away. "Make me come— please ."

That please went straight to Austin's cock, and he suddenly changed his mind about instant gratification. Breathing heavily, he pulled away as a rush of dominance settled in him.

Control .

"Lie down," he commanded quietly. "Now." His muscles tensed, and he watched Cam hungrily, who obeyed with a look of confusion. But Cam was at that point where he'd do anything to get off. Every man on the planet reached that point.

"Don’t fucking tease me," Cam said, lying down on his back. He put one hand behind his head, the other one absently trailing up and down his chest. "Get over here."

Austin chuckled darkly and wiped his mouth. "Let's get one thing straight." He moved in between Cam's legs and hovered over him. "When I'm the one making you come, you're in no position to order me around." He nipped at Cam's bottom lip. "Am I making myself clear, baby?"

"Fuck," Cam breathed out, shivering violently. He swallowed and tilted his head for a kiss, but Austin moved just out of reach. "Yeah—fuck. Yes. Okay."

"Excellent." Austin stole a quick kiss, then settled back on his heels. As he stroked his cock, he dragged it teasingly along the crack of Cam's ass. "Why should I let you come?"

"'Cause you can't help yourself," Cam panted. Christ, he was desperate for Austin to touch him. It was easy to tell. "You want to." At Austin's arched brow, which meant business, Cam backtracked. "Fucking hell, Austin. I'll beg—is that what you want? I'll do anything; just… get me off ."

A slow smile spread on Austin's lips. "You probably shouldn’t have said you'd do anything." At that, he pressed the tip of his cock against Cam's hole. "One might take advantage." He was teasing.

Mostly.

Cam let out a mix between a moan and a whimper and fisted his cock, stroking it roughly. "You wanna fuck me?" He jerked his chin at the coffee table. "There's a condom and lube in my wallet. But—" he sat up abruptly and grabbed Austin's jaw "—you better give up that sweet ass of yours one day, too." Cam was momentarily in charge. Austin was stunned, but his eyes betrayed the primal desire to be inside Cam. "You have no idea how many times I've wanted to bend you over and fuck you into next week. Am I making myself clear?"

Austin shuddered and nodded slowly, still processing. He closed his eyes. It was an odd feeling to both take and be taken. In these past twelve hours or so, he'd been swept off his fucking feet.

That he had to have Cam in his life had been established a long time ago, but now he was realizing just how much they'd grown to need each other—in every aspect. This wasn’t a fluke or a way to pass time.

He didn’t know how to explain himself to Cam, though. The emotions were all jumbled. Once upon a time, Jade had called him a romantic, but she'd gotten it all wrong. He could buy flowers, remember anniversaries, and dine her properly, but words failed him.

So, he just murmured, "I don’t take this lightly." Then he kissed Cam, changing the tension from serious to heated in a second. "I want you to trust me on that."

Cam released a breath and lay down again. "Okay."

Reaching over to the coffee table, Austin retrieved a condom and a small packet of lube, one of those for one-time use. His focus was solely on Cam. He kissed his chest, stroked his cock, and settled between his legs once more. At least he'd had anal sex before. Even if it was more than ten years ago. And with a woman.

"Anything in particular you want before?" he asked as he nuzzled the base of Cam's cock. It had softened a little earlier, but now it was tight and hard again.

"Fingers," Cam grunted, bucking upward. "And suck my dick. Please."

He smiled and guided Cam's cock into his mouth, sucking strongly and wetly.

Just fingers for warm-up, though?

Give me some credit .

Austin had other plans. His right hand took over and stroked Cam; meanwhile, his mouth left a trail of open-mouthed kisses down to Cam's balls and farther down. He licked and sucked at the sensitive skin. More than once, he caught himself inhaling deeply. Mixed with arousal and fresh perspiration was also the scent of Cam's bodywash—the one Austin had borrowed last night in the shower.

The second Austin swiped his tongue over Cam's tight hole, Cam nearly arched off the bed. The curse he spat out was stuttered and gritty, and Austin literally felt how Cam's cock reacted. It strained in his moving hand. He'd definitely received his answer as to whether or not Cam liked having his ass tongue-fucked.

" Jesus , Austin!" Cam almost sounded annoyed—and very out of breath. He lifted himself up to support himself on his elbows. "Warn a guy, will ya—oh, God ." Austin's only response was to close his lips over the light, smooth protrusion and apply pressure with his tongue. Cam's moans spurred him on. "Fuck, fuck, fuck…" The fucks trailed off into shallow breaths.

As if Austin needed more encouragement, Cam pulled up his knees, spread them farther apart, feet still planted on the mattress, and watched with hunger in his eyes. Those expressive eyes, silvery gray, darkened with lust into the color of liquid mercury. Austin held the gaze as he penetrated Cam's ass with his tongue, loosening the tight ring of muscle. For one moment, Cam threw his head back, and Austin was certain he'd never seen anything so goddamn sexy. At the same time, Austin felt a hot trickle of arousal seeping out of Cam's cock.

"You're driving me—" Cam gasped "—driving me insane."

When Austin deemed him ready, he replaced his tongue with his middle finger. A second finger was added within a couple minutes, and then a third. Every now and then, he'd pause to fuck him with his tongue and get him nice and wet.

He'd reduced Cam into a man who pleaded and whimpered instead of grunted and spat out curses.

"Fuck me, Austin," he panted. "I'm fucking begging you."

Both beyond ready, Austin pushed himself up and sat back to roll the condom down his cock. Next he tore off a corner on the packet of lube and coated two fingers that he brought to Cam's ass. He smeared the gleaming liquid around the hole, then pushed inside, only to repeat two, three times with more lube. With his free hand, he added the last of it to his cock. All slicked up and ready, he spent a minute or two rubbing Cam's prostate—just because Cam was so insanely sexy when he lost control. He was writhing and panting, sweat glistening on his torso, and his cock throbbed off of his abdomen.

Removing his fingers from Cam's ass, Austin wiped them on the sheet and gripped the base of his cock, dragging the tip teasingly around Cam's entrance. His heart was racing, and as much as he wasn’t quite ready to delve deeper into whatever he felt for Cam, it was impossible not to acknowledge the significance. He moved higher up so they were face-to-face, and as he slowly began to push his cock inside, he dropped his forehead to Cam's, their labored breaths mingling in the small space between their parted lips.

"Yeah," Cam gritted out in a rush. "More."

Austin looked down between them, watching as his thick erection disappeared into Cam's tight ass. He groaned through clenched teeth and squeezed his eyes shut, countless sensations nearly bowling him over, but opened them again because he needed to see this. The feeling was…out of this fucking world. Tight, slick, hot. Just right.

Oh, holy mother of…

"Are you all right?" Austin asked huskily when he was all in.

"Uh-huh." Cam nodded jerkily and moved his hands to Austin's ass. There was both pain and pleasure reflected in his eyes. "Just been a while."

For the next several moments, Austin kissed and touched Cam wherever he could reach. He didn’t start to move until Cam was begging him to, and then all bets were off. They were both attentive, but that didn’t mean slow or gentle. They let go. Driven by desire and need, they unconsciously unleashed the savage mind-sets they'd had in captivity.

With each thrust of Austin's cock, Cam pushed back and urged him on.

"Don’t fucking stop." Cam dug his heels into Austin's ass and pulled him in for a bruising kiss. "Don't stop, don't stop."

"I won't." Austin moved a hand down between them to stroke Cam. "I can't." The slide of his cock inside Cam's ass was addictive; it was impossible to stop. "I need this—you." He slid out then slammed back in, causing two loud moans to mingle with the sloppy kiss. "I need you." He massaged Cam's tongue with his own, teeth grazing and nipping. And inside of him…it was like a storm building up. Indescribable emotions raged and surged, leaving him raw and open.

A fuck couldn’t alter a man's feelings, but perhaps it could make him realize things.

As far as Austin knew, lust came first, but that wasn’t true here. Somewhere in the past six months, he'd started to fall for Cam, and now there was no going back. He'd been blindsided by terms like friendship and brotherhood, maybe even brothers-in-arms, but this went deeper.

He didn’t have a lot to compare with, but he knew several things for certain. It wasn’t his wife's words of comfort he sought. It wasn’t his own house he wanted to spend time in anymore. It wasn’t Jade's body he wanted to explore, be near, and fucking ravish.

Peering down at Cam's sculpted body, he knew no trauma could cause this kind of attraction. He could've understood wanting Cam as a security blanket after everything they'd been through, but that wasn’t it.

Austin fucked the man under him harder and faster, not because it provided comfort, but because he fucking loved him.

He didn’t know if he'd fallen completely; he didn’t feel like reading into it anyway, but he finally knew where he was headed—where this was headed.

"Let me make you come." He kissed Cam 'til they were both breathless. Austin was on the brink of orgasm, too. " Christ ." He sucked on Cam's bottom lip as his balls drew up and tightened, as the familiar tingling sensation traveled down his spine, and as he buried his cock deep in Cam's ass over and over and over.

"Close," Cam gritted out. "Oh fuck, Austin!" He dug his head back into the pillow, his back arching. "You gotta come, too. Now ."

Like Austin had a choice. He'd already lost his struggle. Rocking deeper into Cam's ass, his climax took over just as the first rope of come pulsed out of Cam's cock. Austin's thighs throbbed, one with a twinge of pain, but he didn’t stop. Through shudders and panting moans, they rode out their orgasms.

Austin rubbed Cam's soaked dick and inhaled deeply, feeling his mouth water. It was heady and nearly dizzying.

As the last trickles of their releases seeped out of their cocks, Austin brought a wet finger to Cam's mouth and brushed it over his lips. And just as the tip of Cam's tongue slipped out, Austin was there to kiss and lick it all up. Their tongues met passionately, tasting the salty arousal, tasting each other.

The kiss eventually slowed, and they floated in a comfortable silence with words left unsaid. They could both feel it, see it, as they looked at each other. The green in Austin's hazel eyes shone brighter than the brown, and the darkness in Cam's silvery eyes had faded.

Austin expected it and wasn’t surprised when Cam averted his eyes, knowing that eye contact wasn’t always easy for Cam. So, Austin brushed a final kiss between Cam's brows and slowly slid out his softening cock.

"Let's clean up, Mr. MBA," Cam said quietly. "Then you're gonna sleep."