Page 52

Chapter 52

Tobias

I check my phone again.Still nothing.

Amelia's audition was sometime this morning,and I'm stuck here, trying to pretend I'm not counting every minute that passes without a word from her.

The tattoo gun buzzes against my palm, but my mind is somewhere in a dance studio across the city, watching her move like she was born to own that stage. Two o'clock crawls closer, and I'm trying to lose myself inmywork.The raven beneath my needle takes shape, feathers dark and sharp against the faded pages of an open book.

Every time my phone lights up, my heart tries to climb out of my chest, only to sink when it's not her name I see.

God, I want her to succeed. I want her to walk into that audition and own every inch of that studio floor like I've watched her do a thousand times before. When she moves, it's like watching poetry write itself in real time—like someone took grace and gave it skin and bones and her smile. I want them to see it. I want them to call her name and give her everything she's ever dreamed of.

But I'm a selfish bastard because I also want her to stay.

I want her in my bed every night, her body arching beneath mine. I want to bury myself so deep inside her that my scent becomes part of her. I want those quiet three a.m. moments when she's half-asleep against my chest, her hair tickling my nose, smelling like her coconut shampoo. I want to wake up to her stealing my blankets, her ice-cold feet tucked between my calves for warmth.

I want to trace her collarbone with my tongue, to mark the sensitive spot below her ear that makes her whisper my name. I want to find her hair ties scattered across my bedroom floor—the black ones she prefers for dance class and the purple one she had around her wrist last night when she rode me until we both saw stars. I want to keep finding them weeks later, tucked under the bed or behind the nightstand—little reminders that she was here and that she's mine.

These wants twist inside me like living things. They're selfish, greedy wants that have no place when stacked against her dreams. But they're there, burning under my skin.

The raven stares back at me from my client's arm, every feather a testament to the three hours I've spent trying not to lose my damn mind.

"Thank you. I love it." Her voice breaks through my thoughts, and I watch her twist her arm, admiring the way the light catches the fresh ink.

"When it’s healed, we’ll add those quotes,” I remind her, peeling off my gloves and tossing them into the trash. I help her out of the chair, glancing at the faint redness around the design. “Three quotes, right?"

"Yeah." The excitement in the young woman's voice barely registers as my phone vibrates against the metal table, and Amelia's name lights up my screen like a beacon in the dark. My heart slams against my ribs so hard I swear the client must hear it, but I can't—won't—be that artist who half-asses the end of a session because something else caught his attention.

Even if that something else is everything.

"If you go see Lola at the front desk, she'll schedule an appointment."

"Sounds great. Thank you so much,” she says, beaming as she heads toward Lola.

The moment she’s out of earshot, I reach for my phone and step out the back.

"Mills?"

"Tobias." Her voice shakes when she speaks, and I'm already holding my breath. "I got in. They loved it." Relief slams into me so hard that I have to press my palm against the wall to stay upright.

"Fucking yes, Mills! I knew it! I fucking knew you'd do it! I told you!" Pride surges through me, and the grin on my face is so wide that it hurts.

"I can't believe it."

"We're celebrating tonight,"I tell her, and it's not a question. "Whatever you want. Wherever you want."

"Logan and Harper asked if we wanted to go to a club—dancing, drinks… We don't have to, but I said I'd ask. I'm only going if you're coming."

"Idon't care what we do. I just want to be with you." Until we can't be. The thought gnaws at me, but I shove it aside. "God, I'm so proud of you, Firefly. So fucking proud."

"Thank you. I'll see you back at the apartment, yeah?"

"I've got a piercing to do, but I'll be home in an hour, baby."

As soon as the call ends, I slip my phone back into my pocket, and Lola stares at me like she's waiting for me to trip over myself.

"What?"I ask, raising an eyebrow.

"Who were you talking to?"

"Amelia. She was auditioning this morning."

"Since when do you call her baby?"She's smiling now, the kind of knowing smile that makes me want to walk the other way. "Thin walls, handsome. You know that."

"What do you want me to say, Lo?"

"That you're not stupid enough to be screwing your stepsister. Do you even realize how messy that shit's gonna get?"

"Yeah, I'm way past giving a single fuck about how messy it is."

Her eyes narrow, searching my face, and then she laughs, shaking her head. "Wow."

"What?"

"I just never thought I'd see the day."

"That's because she's been living in Pennsylvania the entire time you've known me."

"You always had these feelings?"She crosses her arms, leaning against the counter.

"No,"I admit, taking a sip of my water. "But she's the other half of me. Always has been, one way or another."

"Okay, I'm sorry I called you stupid. I just assumed you'd run out of pussy."

I nearly spit out my drink. "Fucking hell, Lola."

"Oh, come on. You were never the 'settle down with one girl'type."

"Because none of those women were her. It's that simple."

She stares at me for a beat, then grins. "Call her back and get her to come here. I'll give her a free tattoo as a reward for taming your ass."

"Firstly, if anyone is going to tattoo her,it'll be me. Second, you're one to talk. You've probably had more pussy than I ever have."

"What can I say?"She shrugs, smirking. "I know what I'm doing better than any man."

"Gonna strongly disagree with you there,"I mutter, shaking my head. "But, yeah, I've heard a lot of men can't tell the difference between a tit and a clit."

"Which is where I come in."She gestures dramatically, holding her arms out like she expects applause. "But seriously, Tobias, are you happy?"

Her tone shifts, and I meet her gaze. "So damn happy."

"Then that's all that matters. Fuck everyone else."

Her words stick with me as I finish my last piercing for the day. The second I'm done, I'm out the door, desperate to get home and kiss the life out of my girl.

The moment I step into the apartment, my feet carry me straight to her room like they've got a mind of their own. She's perched at her vanity, fingers fumbling with a delicate silver chain, and for a second, I just watch.

Eventually, I step behind her, brushing her hands away gently to take over. My fingers easily find the clasp, securing the chain as my eyes lock onto hers in the mirror. I lower my lips to the nape of her neck and allow myself to indulge in her scent before I place a soft kiss on her skin.

"Have I told you how proud of you I am?"

"A couple of times."I wrap my arms around her waist, settling my head on her shoulder, and holy fuck, if this isn't the most boyfriend thing I've ever done. And I'm here for it. All of it. The way she melts back against me like she belongs there? Yeah, that shit's addictive.

"What did they say? I want to know everything,"I urge, watching her reflection closely.

She tips her head, and I see the moment she goes back there in her mind. "I almost ran. I watched a few people go before me, and my confidence just… disappeared. Like, full-on fell out of my ass."

My arms tighten instinctively. "What made you stay?"

"My dad."Her voice goes soft, tender in a way that makes my chest squeeze, and when our eyes meet in the mirror, hers are swimming with tears. This is Amelia, the girl who never cries, wearing her heart on her sleeve. "This was everything he wanted for me. And I won't let fear run my life."

I pull her closer, my arms tightening around her like I can shield her from anything that might threaten this happiness.

"Then I thought about you,"she whispers.

"Me?"

She nods, turning in my arms until we're face to face. Her fingers thread through my hair, tugging me closer into her space. "The only other thing that scares me this much is you. The thought of not having you."

She's stuck with me. Every morning. Every night. Every messy moment in between.

"The tour…"She hesitates, and my stomach drops. "It starts in a month."

The reality of her words crashes down, and I know she's been dreading this moment. My grip tightens, and I force myself to stay present and not spiral into what this means. She needs me here now. The rest, we'll figure out together.

"I don't expect you to put your life on hold for me." Her voice wavers just enough to make my chest tight. "Whatever our relationship is, it's new. But when I come home—if you still want me—I'm yours."

My heart damn near stops. "What does that mean, Firefly? I need you to be specific with me here."

"It means that I want you—all of you. I want us. I want the storm it'll create and the mess and chaos that being with you will bring. I know it's bad timing, but…"

I'm so fucking wrecked for this woman.

"I swear to god, Mills, I will break every clock on this fucking planet to prove to you that none of this is bad timing."

That smile curves her lips—the one that knocks me on my ass every single time.

"We've known each other forever. What we have… it runs deeper than anything I've ever felt. But you can't honestly expect me to go the next—"

"One hundred and eighty-twodays." The number falls from her lips like a death sentence.

"One hundred and eighty-twodays without sex."

She goes rigid in my arms, muscles coiling tight like she's about to make a break for it, but my grip only tightens. No way in hell am I letting her run from me.

"I don't know what you want me to say to that, Tobias."

"Whatever's in that beautiful head of yours?" I murmur, watching my girl's jealousy crawl to the surface.

"Honestly? I want to tell you to go fuck yourself." She places her hands on my chest, and my fiery little Firefly looks like she's ready to punch me.

I press my lips to her ear, and she relaxes with every word. "And here was me thinking I could come and visit you when I'm not working." I lean in, my lips brushing her ear as I whisper, "So I can get eight inches inside you when I can't take being without you anymore." When I meet her gaze again, she's fighting that smile I love.

"I hate you sometimes."

"Good." I grin, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. "Told you angry sex is my favorite." She smacks my chest, but that reluctant smile is winning. "Besides, you started this with all that 'don't put your life on hold' bullshit."

"I regretted it the second it left my mouth."

"You're it for me, Mills, and I'll still be here when you come home to me."

"Yeah?" Her doe eyes light up, and all I want to do is kiss her senseless.

"Yeah, I just wish I'd figured it out sooner."

"You know people will say things about us, don't you?"

"Couldn't care less, baby. Let them talk. I'll take you home and fuck every last one of their jealous comments right out of your mind until the only thing you remember is the way it feels when we're together."

As I look into her big brown eyes, those three little words sit heavy on my tongue. I'll say them, and she'll hear them. But I want them to be pure—untainted by goodbye, distance, or fear. Because when those words leave my mouth, they won't just be words. They'll be a promise. A declaration that I am, and always will be, hers.