Page 20 of A Spinster for the Rakish Duke (Notorious Sisters of London #3)

Chapter Nineteen

“ A third day in a row, brother? What drastically inappropriate local will you be taking Lady Cheek to this time? The docks? Perhaps to have dinner at the club, bring her around to meet the gents?” Alistair sat enjoying his breakfast and had noticed his brother heading for the door.

“Unfortunately, I will have to put those plans on hold,” Donovan answered dryly. “Miss Bradford departs to return home this morning. I am off to wish her safe travels.”

“She’s leaving? You haven’t found her brother, have you? I’m sure I wouldn’t have heard the end of it if you had,” Alistair pried.

“No, unfortunately, we are at a point in the investigation where we must wait and see what happens. And that also means we are at a point where Miss Bradford must return to where she belongs,” Donovan informed his brother.

“Such as it is. Are you going to mope around like you did the last time you two parted in an unfortunate circumstance?” Alistair asked while sounding quite bored with the whole of the events.

“I have not decided yet,” Donovan informed his brother tersely before he walked out the door.

A knock at the door roused Emma from watching the tree that sprouted spring leaves outside her brother's window.

“Miss Bradford?” Herst called from the other side of the door. “The carriage has been prepared. It will be ready to leave at your word.”

Emma swallowed to clear the thickness in her throat, and she spoke up. “And Mr. Connor?”

“He has not arrived yet, Miss, though I have no doubt he will arrive as soon as he is able.” There was a pause. “Shall I fetch you when he arrives?”

“No,” Emma told the young man, her voice growing in boldness. “No, send him here to the room, will you?”

Another pause before Herst replied, “Yes, Miss, I will do just that as soon as he gets here.”

Her thanks were again meek as she heard the soft footsteps of Mr. Herst as he departed. What exactly did she have planned for Donovan’s arrival? She couldn’t confess or act on her feelings. She was far too shy to attempt something like that, not bold like her sister Martha encouraged her to be.

She couldn’t tell him about why she must marry Mr. Dole. She knew that hearing the words would be needlessly cruel. She did not need to speak those words to him. He surely must understand the nature of these things. So why did she ask Mr. Herst to send him to her? What would come of it?

They would be alone together, and she needed to be alone with him one more time. Get the chance to touch him one more time. Be held so close by the man she was falling in love with one more time. Her tears were almost burning hot against her cheek.

“Emma.” His voice was soft but still startled her from her thoughts. Donovan stood in the room in front of the open doorway. “I’m sorry, Miss Bradford, I knocked, but there was no response. I shall depart., he assured her as he turned back to the door.

“No, Donovan, please stay,” she said suddenly as she stood and moved closer to him. Instead of walking out, he closed the door.

“What will come of me staying?” he asked. “Nothing good, I can assure you.”

“But it's still what we both want, isn’t it?” she answered his question with a question.

“What is it that you want, Emma?” he asked, turning to face her. The question wasn’t angry or confused but genuine. As genuine as she ever heard Donovan be.

“I want you to touch me once more before I must depart. I can’t say for sure what will happen when I leave this place, but I know you can make me feel... here... and whole before I go.” She wiped a few more tears away from her face.

Donovan looked down at her and gently cupped her face in his hands, holding her and caressing her cheeks. “For now, in these few moments, we won’t think of anything but these moments alone. No future, just now.”

She looked up at him, eyes filled with adoration and longing. He made her feel like all those thoughts she had about living as a spinster were truly foolish, like her heart was moving a million beats a second and frozen perfectly still.

And then he kissed her.

The kiss was passionate and tender all at the same time, the perfect kiss, the type of kiss she had come to expect from Donovan. They intertwined with one another, pulling each other closer.

This was the first time they could touch where they were held back by neither apprehension nor physical restraint, and they tried to take full advantage of it in the short window that they had.

Donovan grasped at her, squeezing and grasping at the gentle curves of her thighs and buttocks hidden within the folds of her dress.

Emma dug her nails into Donovan’s broad back, using his strength and demanding more of him, which he was happy to give.

Had Donovan even an ounce less self-restraint, he might have yanked her clothes from her body right there on the spot.

Emma, at that moment, would have let him.

Instead, knowing she would have to right herself before she departed, he opted for something a bit more subtle.

He tugged at the collar of her dress, exposing her neck and collar bone.

He was upon her, exploring with his lips, teeth, and tongue eagerly, wanting to have her in any way he could, while he could.

Emma was inexperienced. She had never been with a man to this degree, and although she wasn’t afraid, she was uncertain what to do.

“Donovan, I’ve never…” she said, face flushing even brighter than it was before which made her feel even more foolish considering the situation. “I want to make you feel good too,” she said earnestly.

Donovan smiled and considered her for a moment. Then he gently took her hand and led it to the outside of the front of his pants. “Just touch me. Feel me. Your touch will make me feel good, I promise,” he told her in a soft and encouraging voice.

Her touch was gentle but brave, trusting that Donovan would guide her if she went astray.

She needn’t search long for what she sought with her fingertips was as firm and obvious as it had been when it had lain against her thigh.

She felt him let out a hot breath against her neck which turned into a light groan when she gave him a squeeze.

She had an approximate knowledge of the matter at hand, so to speak.

Few women are ever truly ignorant, but most of her knowledge was from reading.

She wasn’t fully sure what to expect, but she had to admit it felt.

.. big. Something worth admiration, and she wanted to continue admiring it with her touch.

Donovan, encouraged by Emma’s touch, pressed his hands to her clothed form, searching out her sensitive areas through the layers.

Emma had to stifle herself when Donovan found one of the sensitive spots that hid beneath her chemise.

Donovan's fingertips toyed with Emma’s nipple, squeezing through her clothes and stimulating her in a way she never expected.

The excited urges that were unleashed from Emma only pushed her to do more.

Where before she was exploring with one hand, she was now grasping with both, excitement and curiosity urging her on until Donovan’s hands gently stayed hers.

He was smiling and looked very strained, but not necessarily in a bad way.

“As much as I am really enjoying that, it would be unwise to continue at this moment,” he told her.

They were both reluctant to stop, but a quick examination of their states made it clear that if they went any further, they would have a very hard time covering it up.

Emma’s hair was astray, and both of their clothes were disheveled.

Donovan would also need a moment to compose himself before it would be appropriate for him to walk out of the room with Emma, lest his excitement gave him away.

Emma couldn’t help but find that more than a little amusing, if also embarrassing.

“Why are you smiling?” he asked her while he returned the gesture.

“I think we are being very silly is all,” she laughed, but the laugh also contained a touch of sadness.

“I think people oftentimes can’t help but be more than a bit silly. Something about humanity, I suppose,” he told her. He was only half kidding, but they both laughed all the same.

From the moment Emma stepped onto the carriage, she knew it wasn’t goodbye.

Of course, she had treated it as a goodbye.

Had given thanks and departing promises to write to both Mr. Connor and Mr. Herst. They each in turn made their own commitments to her.

It was all very commonplace, but she knew that she wouldn’t be able to keep herself from London for long.

She knew she wouldn’t be able to keep herself from Donovan for long.

During the length of her carriage ride, a million different ideas played out how she could come up with any excuse in the world to go to London.

Her brother would be found eventually, of that she was quite optimistic, but even after that, there would be reasons.

She and Mr. Connor were friends, after all, and a social call is acceptable once in a while, then there were her hobbies.

There was still some shame there that hovered in her heart.

The shame of disloyalty. The shame of her married life and love life not being one and the same.

But shame and desperation mix as oil and water, one causing the other to go unseen for some time.

So, while the shame was there, it was supplanted by the need.

The need to have more of Donovan in her life.

She would find a way. She had to.

“So,” Donovan let out a deep breath as the carriage rolled away, finally letting himself accept Emma’s departure. “What will you do now, Mr. Herst?” he asked the man next to him.

“To be honest, Your Grace, I’ve been trying not to think about it.

Once we have discovered where Mr. Bradford has gotten, it is unlikely he will keep me on as his apprentice given my ejection from the Inn of Courts.

He may choose to keep me on as a messenger, but I doubt he could justify the cost of boarding me then, and…

” he sighed and kicked his foot against one of the loose cobblestones causing it to clack, “well, it will probably take me some time before I am sorted again.”

“I’m sorry that my actions placed you in such a state,” Donovan said, sincerity clear in his voice. He had grown quite fond of the young man in their short time together, and an idea was brewing in the back of his mind and rapidly moving to the front as they spoke.

“I helped you in the ways that I wanted to. You never twisted my arm, Your Grace, and I consider us even,” Mr. Herst assured him.

“I’m glad to hear that,” Donovan said, “though, knowing that you need room, board, and employment and having spent the last several days with you, I do believe I have an opening in my home you would be well suited for. If you are interested, that is.”

“An opening?” Herst asked, clearly not expecting this turn in the conversation.

“Yes. You see, despite the insistence of some of my peers, as well as my brother, I have never taken on a valet. The practice always struck me funny, to be honest. But I think you would be a good fit. Truly,” Donovan said.

“But, Your Grace, I have no experience in such a position. And surely being the valet of a Duke would be demanding to say the least,” Mr. Herst said, his voice not carrying a lot of confidence in the prospect he just was offered.

Donovan noted a hint of disbelief that lingered in Herst’s voice as if he thought Donovan was leading him on.

“There will be skills and such you will have to develop; I have no doubt. But you have solicitor training, which makes you a very well-suited valet for the matters I like to deal in. Also, I think having someone I would consider my friend close at hand at all times as my valet seems like it would be, well, a very smart move on my part.”

“I thought Lords weren’t supposed to be friends with their staff?” Mr. Herst asked, but more of the skepticism had left his voice.

“And solicitors apprentices aren’t supposed to knock Lords over when a Duke asks them to. Bending the rules a tad seems like a good way to surprise people when the need arises, wouldn’t you say?” Donovan asked him slyly.

“I say, I’m not going to need a solicitor to look over the employment contract.” And they both laughed.

“So, you’ll take the position then? That’s grand.” He smiled and grabbed Herst’s hand shaking it heartily. “I think this will work out swimmingly for the both of us.” Donovan gestured for Mr. Herst to walk with him to the carriage.

“So, when will I have to start, um, attending to you, Your Grace?” Herst asked, stopping before the carriage door, unsure if he was supposed to open it.

“Is it part of your job to know?” Donovan asked laughing. Herst laughed too, although much more nervously. They both stood there for a moment until Herst gave in awkwardly and opened the carriage door for Donovan, causing him to laugh the whole time he ascended the carriage steps.