Page 32 of A Song in the Dark

He checked his watch as he scanned the remaining throng outside the concert hall.

People came in droves to see Chaisley perform.

Crowds lined up outside the concert halls, universities, and opera houses to meet her.

Word had spread like wildfire that the brilliant pianist was blind.

Many people wanted to express their amazement at her talent and her ability to overcome.

Some wanted to just get a glimpse of her and watch how she did it.

And, of course, there were those who frowned and criticized the masses for praising a “cripple” and an “invalid.” Two words he despised.

But the people who mattered most were the quiet ones who waited until all the others left. Who wished to speak to them in private.

Tonight, they spent more than two hours outside as Chaisley and Melanie spoke to the ones who waited.

Melanie carried a small leather notebook tucked inside a pocket of her dress. Whenever she pulled it out, Rick’s senses heightened, and he scanned the sidewalks and corners looking for anyone who might be watching with sinister motives.

He couldn’t risk anything happening to Chaisley or Melanie.

Melanie was still writing information down, and Rick didn’t see anyone nefarious around. But it was dark. Someone could be in the shadows.

Chaisley leaned forward and whispered something.

Her strength of late amazed him. Over the brief time he’d known her, he’d watched her bloom. Even under the pressure of all she poured into each performance. She indeed gave people hope and inspired them.

And then there was Section D. The order was simple: “to plan, prepare, and when necessary carry out sabotage and other clandestine operations, as opposed to the gathering of intelligence.”

This addition to his job while he was Chaisley’s driver complicated matters.

When they were in Germany, he was to gather as much information as he could on how the Nazis were using the railways.

And if he had a chance to plan sabotage of communications or electricity, he was to put things in place for that.

Another agent was tasked with Germany’s agriculture and food supplies.

The SIS scrambled to replace agents, contacts, and informants.

But they needed more people on the front lines and fast. During the cease in communications—he’d felt completely in the dark.

Now that information was flowing again, he prayed each day for the recent dwindling numbers to turn around and surge upward.

Hitler and his Nazi regime were growing exponentially. Any day could be the start of a new war.

His heart sank a little as he watched Chaisley.

How could he leave her? In the months he’d spent with her and Melanie, their kindness and compassion had captivated him.

Challenged his own faith. And only strengthened his resolve to help their cause.

To do whatever he could to help the innocents she was quietly helping to escape.

But he was still a spy. And he had an obligation to his country.

Was there a possibility he could help them through his job? He scratched the side of his jaw. What is Your will here, Lord? I don’t know what to do.

When the women reached the last person waiting to speak with them, he moved closer and then escorted them back to the auto. The car was quiet as he drove them back to the hotel. It had been a full night. They had to be exhausted.

Once they were in their suite of rooms, which Chaisley insisted upon now to help Melanie feel safe and protected, Melanie excused herself for the night. Chaisley ensconced herself on the couch, her feet tucked up under her and a blanket over her lap.

He eyed her from his stance near the front door. “You should get some rest.”

“You shouldn’t worry overmuch. You know it takes me a bit to unwind after a concert.” The soft smile on her face was relaxed. Comfortable. “If you’ve got some time to sit and chat, I’d like the company.”

An invitation too tempting to refuse.

He took a seat across from her and propped his feet up on the coffee table.

“Please remove your shoes, Mr. Zimmerman. We don’t want to scratch the fine wood.”

He winced. Caught again. “Sorry.”

“It’s quite all right.” Her smile broadened. “I have to give you a hard time. Everyone mother-hens me, it’s about time I do the same.”

After he removed his shoes and wiggled his toes around, it was amazing how much his body relaxed. He let out a sigh.

“See? Much better, isn’t it?” Her voice was lighter than he’d heard it in days.

“Much.” And it was. But his relief had everything to do with the beautiful woman opposite him.

Chaisley’s smile was wide. “We haven’t had a chance to talk lately, and I’m sorry for that. I didn’t want you to think I was still upset with you.”

The admission did his heart a world of good. “I’ve been worried that I’d ruined things between us.”

“No. You didn’t.” Her face softened as she dipped her chin. “I don’t want to lose your friendship.”

That perked him up. And the pink that entered her cheeks made him smile. “Your friendship means a great deal to me as well.”

She was silent for several moments. He loved the way her fingers delicately played on her lap whatever melody was in her mind. The way her long eyelashes brushed the top of her cheeks when she blinked. Did she have any idea what a stunning woman she was?

“So tell me, Rick... do you have dreams for your future?”

His eyebrows quirked upward. She wanted to know about his dreams?

He plucked a thread off his pants. How could he express what he wasn’t even sure about himself?

“Well ... at this point, my dreams are to survive whatever is coming. When I think of what we all went through during the Great War, the thought of another is awful. But I fear it will be much worse and that has squashed any thoughts of my own dreams.”

She tipped her head to the side, a soft smile lifting one corner of her mouth. “Surely you must still have hopes for the future.”

He did. What would her reaction be if he told her he wouldn’t trade this time with her for anything. That he didn’t care what the future held as long as she was in it in some way. But he couldn’t dare admit that out loud. Best to turn the question back to her. “What about you and your dreams?”

Her profile was lovely as she faced the fireplace.

“I do. But they have dimmed the past year or so—like you, it’s hard to see past what might be coming.

Still...” She hesitated, then tapped her knee with her fingers.

“I’d love to marry and have a family someday.

While my grandmother is still alive so she can be a part of my children’s lives.

She’s been such an integral part of mine.

But not many men are interested in marrying someone who isn’t whole. ”

That last part made him jerk in his seat. Did she really see herself that way? He would have never guessed. She carried herself with such confidence and poise. “Not whole? Is that how you think people see you?”

She shrugged. “I’ve heard it quite a bit of late.

My grandmother and Dr. G never allowed me to think less of myself after the accident.

They made sure to give me the tools to thrive and told me I could accomplish whatever I wanted if I put in the time and effort.

And frankly, I took a lot of pride in the fact that people were fascinated with me as a prodigy. ”

“But now you’ve chosen to listen to the naysayers?”

Another shrug. She still wouldn’t turn her face toward him. How odd. Most of the time he felt as if she was looking straight at him. Or through him.

Several seconds passed before she dipped her chin, and her fingers began to tap again.

“I know it’s silly. But there are times I wonder how on earth I’m supposed to meet someone and get to know him as I’m touring the world playing the piano.

There’ve been plenty of admirers from afar over the years, but I don’t have any real friends other than Melanie. There’s no time.”

“Well, now you’ve got me, too.” His superiors would scold him for saying it—and letting it happen in the first place. If only his job didn’t still hold many secrets.

That smile of hers could melt an iceberg. “You’re sweet, Rick. I greatly appreciate your friendship and have enjoyed getting to know you.”

“But... ?”

She frowned. “But what?”

He laughed at the expression on her face. “Sorry. It sounded like there was a but in there, like you were about to tell me we couldn’t be friends anymore.”

She waved a hand toward him. “Heavens, no.” Those lovely fingers were tapping at full speed now. “I think I wanted to tell you that I’d love to get to know you better, but then I second-guessed myself because that would sound awfully forward and unladylike.”

The uncertainty on her face twisted in his heart like a knife. “I’d like that too.” But was it a good idea? How were they going to navigate the dangerous waters ahead?

“I hear the hesitation in your voice. You’re concerned.

Like I am.” She pulled her knees up under the blanket and circled her arms around them.

“I’ve never met anyone like you, Rick. And not just because you’re a spy.

” Her laugh was light. “I love your heart. You’ve jumped in and helped every step of the way.

You rescued Melanie. You protect me and encourage me and support me.

But I’m scared. More than I care to admit. These times are so uncertain.”

Oh, to keep her safe! To have that right because she belonged to him. But with who she was, and what they all were doing, was keeping her safe even possible? He didn’t mind risking his own neck, but hers? “I’m scared too.”

Because there was a very real chance that none of them would escape this alive.

Melanie’s legs were stiff. She’d been leaning up against the door to her room in the suite. She wasn’t even sure how long she’d stood there. But she couldn’t move.

In front of Chaisley and Rick, she’d done her level best to show that she was strong. The attack hadn’t gotten to her. That the news of Rick working for the SIS didn’t faze her. That the ever-growing danger around them didn’t scare her.

But it was all a lie.

Everywhere they went, she saw Nazis ready to arrest them.

She worried every time Rick disappeared in the night.

And then ... every night, the memories of the attack overwhelmed her.

Tonight had been harder to hide it than ever before. As soon as they’d returned to the hotel, her legs had started to shake, and her insides quivered.

They were safe. No one could get to her here.

But the memory of that night wouldn’t leave her alone. It screamed in her mind that she was vulnerable. Weak. She shouldn’t be there.

If anything good had come out of the attack, it had given her more resolve to help those less fortunate.

The bad often outweighed that good.

Then the voices inside her would start to fight.

This was Chaisley’s battle, not hers. What business did she have trying to save people when she couldn’t even save herself?

She shook her head. No. That wasn’t the truth. She was just as passionate about this as Chaisley. She wanted to be a part.

This was the right thing to do.

But what if she was attacked again? She’d never have the strength to endure it twice. She’d fall apart. And everyone she was trying to help would suffer in the process.

Chaisley would be alone, and Melanie couldn’t abandon her friend like that.

She was a worthless human being.

Slumping to the floor against the door, she buried her face in her hands.

Would she ever get past this? Or would it haunt her for the rest of her life? Why did it feel like her prayers had been useless?

Ever since the attack she’d read the book of Esther every day. Hoping to find the strength that she needed to continue on. It had helped, but moments like this made her doubt herself.

“God, help me. Please.” She spoke to the ceiling. “I can’t go on like this. Chaisley needs me. Lots of people need her. Give me Your strength ... God, I’m begging You. Please. Take this burden from me.”

As she choked out the last words, hot tears burned trails down her cheeks. The first time she’d allowed it since the attack.

Now the floodgate was open.

She moved to a crawling position and sobbed her way to the washroom where she splashed cold water on her face, but the tears continued. Grabbing a towel, she buried her face in it and wept. Lying on the cool floor, she sobbed and released it all into more capable hands.

She wasn’t alone.

Her Father understood.

In that moment, she felt cocooned in His arms as she poured out her fear and grief.