Page 14 of A Simple Scandal (Millionaires of Mayfair #3)

Thirteen

G race paced the length of the room and back as she repeated the litany over and over. “Please, please make him well.”

Her stomach dropped as if she had taken a jump off the highest fence at Pelham Hall. What would she do if he didn’t survive?

No. She would not allow herself to think such thoughts. He was a man in the prime of his life. He was strong, and more than anything, he was determined. He would not let this illness defeat him.

“Dane, do not give up.” She huffed at the ridiculousness of her words. He couldn’t hear her. Though they were in the same wing, he was in his ducal suites as large as the Prince Regents’ royal apartments. Besides, he was half out of his mind with a fever.

“ Grace. ” Another agonizing cry echoed through the house.

How long could she allow him to suffer without going to him? Perhaps if she’d let him see her, it would be enough for him to calm down and rest.

“ Grace, please .”

She squeezed her eyes closed at the heartbreaking sound of him calling for her. Enough was enough. She would not allow him to suffer if her presence or simple touch would bring him comfort.

Grace cinched the belt of her dressing gown. Just as she was about to take a step toward the door, a rapid knock echoed.

Thinking it could be Dane, she ran to the door and flung it open. Instead, an agitated Winston stood there, wringing his hands.

“My lady, I apologize for disturbing you so late. I hate to ask because I don’t want you to become ill yourself, but might you consider seeing His Grace? He’s distraught and refuses to rest.” Winston turned his gaze down the hallway as another gut-wrenching yell sounded. “He will not retire until he speaks with you. I understand if you don’t want to come. But I told him I’d ask.”

“Of course. I was about to come to his room.” She smiled slightly. “Please, there’s no need to apologize. I’m worried about him, also.” She stepped out into the hallway, and the two of them made their way to Dane’s chambers.

Winston nodded gratefully. “Thank you, ma’am.”

“Have you called for the doctor?” She pulled her belt tighter. At least she would see him with her own eyes and could judge his condition.

“Yes, but he’s out of town visiting his daughter. She’s about to give birth to his first grandchild.” His brow furrowed into a worried frown. “I’ve sent a footman and a groomsman to London to bring back another doctor, but I don’t expect them for three days.”

“I’ll help in any way I can.” She patted the butler’s arm as they hurried down the hallway.

“Grace, come to me.” Dane’s bellow grew more agitated. “Please, Grace.”

Winston opened the door of the ducal apartments and motioned for Grace to enter. He followed and pointed to a closed door across the private salon. The entire ducal bedchamber was decorated in silver, gray, and black. It was elegant and masculine, like Dane.

Just as she reached for the door latch, the door swung open, and a footman looked straight ahead, neither acknowledging her nor Winston. She entered the room with Winston following a step behind her.

The lavish room was decorated for a king, with a massive four-poster bed with brocade curtains surrounding it. A fireplace held a robust fire, casting the room in a golden warmth.

When Grace realized Dane wasn’t in bed, her gaze flew across the room until it landed on the most enormous copper tub she had ever seen. With wet hair and his back to her, Dane lay in the tub with his head resting on the lip. Two other footmen stood beside the tub as if keeping watch.

“Grace,” he bellowed again.

Winston cleared his throat. “Lady Grace is here, sir.”

“Oh.” He sat up slightly as if surprised. “Ah, Gracie,” Dane crooned loudly. “Finally, you’re heeding my call.” He braced his arms against the walls of the oblong tub and looked behind him. It took a moment for him to find her. “Come closer.”

Grace took a step back. Not only was it awkward to be in his bedroom, but the man was naked and bathing in a tub. “That’s not appropriate, Your Grace.”

“Shush,” he called out. He pointed to a spot next to his tub. “Come closer. I’m getting hoarse calling for her.” He shook his head and laughed. “I mean calling for you.”

Grace glanced at Winston, who nodded once. Slowly, she made her way to Dane’s side.

“Why were you at the Jolly Rooster this evening?” Dane brought a wet linen towel to his chest. It was long enough to cover his torso. Who knew that Dane was modest?

When she reached his side, he picked up the toweling and twisted it, wringing the excess water from the linen.

Her gaze skimmed over his chest. As a young man, he had always been muscular. When they were younger, she studied his body whenever they swam together in the pond. It was a thing of beauty that always made her feel hot and achy. But as a man, he was incredible. Every defined muscle, sinew, and ligament begged to be touched. Her hand seemed to have a mind of its own as she reached for him, but thankfully, she jerked it away in time before anyone noticed.

“Everyone out except my Gracie.”

Winston took a step forward. “No, Your Grace. That’s improper.”

“No, it’s not. Grace is the queen of prim and proper. Or should I say the duchess of prim and proper.” He bent his legs. “She’ll protect me. Besides, she’s marrying me.”

“Dane,” she murmured. “You’re ill.”

He grabbed one side of the tub and made his way to stand. He swayed as he stood. Water sluiced across the golden skin of his muscular backside. Unable to look away, she watched the water careen in zigzags across his taut skin and muscles. Good lord, she was gawking at him like he was a sweet treat, and she was a starving woman.

“Could you help me, Grace?” He swayed again. “I seem to have lost my balance and can’t find it anywhere.”

The two footmen by the tub rushed forward and grabbed his arms, helping him out of the water. Winston ran to his side with a linen toweling. Dane batted it away and reached for a gold silk banyan. For a moment, she mourned the loss of viewing his magnificent body. What was wrong with her? The poor man was gravely ill. But even sick and fully covered, Dane was an imposing sight wearing such a garment.

She stared at the plush carpet to avoid seeing something she shouldn’t. “Perhaps you should retire. Your body needs rest.”

Dane nodded. “You need rest too, so you’ll stay with me.”

“Your Grace, no.” Winston’s objection sang through the air. “There are reputations to be considered.”

No one moved or said a peep until Dane broke the silence. “Not to worry, Winston. My reputation is safe.” He lifted his nose and tried to sniff the air but coughed instead. “Grace is here. She won’t let anything happen to me.”

Carefully, the footmen escorted him to his bed.

Winston turned to her. “I’m sorry. I don’t think he knows what he’s saying.”

She patted his hand. “I’m sure once he’s asleep, you’ll be able to get some rest. Don’t worry about me. I’ll see myself out.”

She hadn’t taken two steps until Dane bellowed her name. “ Gracie. Where are you off to? I told you that you must stay here.”

Winston let out a pained sigh. “Your Grace, must I remind you that you have house guests who might overhear you?"

Dane sat on the edge of his bed, then waved away the footmen. Always a gentleman, he murmured, “Thank you for your assistance.” He turned his attention to Winston. “I don’t care. Marbury doesn’t care. The only thing he cares about is Lady Athena.” He laughed slightly, then turned his fevered gaze to her. “The only thing I care about is you.” He swallowed, and the effort was difficult for him. “Will you please not leave me again?”

Grace stared at him for a moment. His eyes glistened with emotion. She'd never seen him this vulnerable in all the years they’d known one another.

“I’ll beg if you want me to,” Dane said softly. “I don’t care if Winston, John, Harry, and Thomas see me. I don’t care if all my other footmen see me. Add in all the rest of my staff, here and at the Jolly Rooster, too.” He extended his hand. “Please, Grace. I need you.”

The entreaty in his gaze almost brought her to her knees. “Do not fret. I will stay by your side as long as you need me to.” She turned to Winston. “I’ll help him fall asleep, then come find you.”

Winston studied Dane and then turned to Grace. “Thank you, my lady.” He pointed to the salon next door. “I will be in there with the door open if you need me.”

“You will not sleep in there with the door open. Neither will Grace,” Dane huffed out a command. “Winston, you shall sleep in your bed. Don’t worry about Grace.” The most wicked smile pulled at one corner of his mouth. “She’s sleeping with me. In my bed.” His balance wobbled, but he straightened his back, his arrogance fully displayed. “Where she belongs.”

Winston motioned for the footmen to leave, then slid beside her. “Call if you need me.” He glanced at Dane, then smiled softly. “He’s adamant that you stay with him. He’s as weak as a kitten. I’ve known him since he was a baby. He has a good heart?—”

“Winston, I can hear you,” Dane growled, then flexed his bicep. “I’m strong as a lion.”

“Good night, Your Grace.” Dane’s butler winked at Grace. “Thank you for taking care of him.” He turned and closed the door behind him.

“So, what shall we do?” Dane patted the bed beside him. “Come sit by me. We could play vingt et un, whist, hazard, or loo.” He held his head in his hands. “I don’t know where the cards are. I probably left them at the Jolly Rooster. I’ll fetch them. I could ask Winston to bring more people into my room. We need five players for loo.”

“Dane,” she said softly. “Why don’t you rest? I could read to you.”

He wrinkled his nose. “That’s boring.” He waggled his eyebrows. “If we play hazard, then the loser of each hand must remove an item of clothing. What are you wearing?” He studied her attire. “By my calculations, you are wearing a dressing gown and a chemise. I’m wearing my banyan. You’re at an advantage then.”

“I never take advantage of a sick man.” Grace shook her head with a smile. This was the Dane she knew from long ago. He was always self-assured and included her in every devilment or shenanigan he could think of.

With his eyes half closed, he began to unbutton his banyan. He fumbled with one button, then finally wrestled it open. “Take me off of this.” He frowned. “I meant help me take this off. Then we’ll take off your clothing.”

“I don’t think that’s wise.” She bit her lower lip to stifle a laugh as she pulled the banyan over his shoulders. “You’ll catch a chill.”

“I’ll not suffer such a fate, especially if I see you naked,” he murmured. “I’m always hot when you’re close to me.” With an exaggerated movement, he threw back the covers and then fell against the pillows. “This is the worst luck. I have the most beautiful woman in the world in my bedroom, and I’m ready to fall over.”

Her heart swelled in her chest at the compliment. “Careful, Your Grace. I will write everything you say in my journal and read it back to you.”

“If you publish it, I wager you’ll sell a million copies. Everyone listens to what I say except you.” He moved to the middle of the bed and leaned back against the stack of pillows. He closed his eyes and patted the bed. “Will you sit with me?” He opened one eye to peek at her.

Without saying a word, Grace joined him in bed. He was sitting in the bed with his long legs stretched before him. She scooted next to his body and mimicked his pose.

She reached over and felt his forehead. His fever had gone down. No doubt it was due to his bath. “If you become feverish again, I’ll call the footman so you can take another bath.”

“Thank you.” He reached for her hand and entwined their fingers together. “Do you know you’re the first woman I’ve ever had in my bedroom?” He squeezed her hand. “It’s only fitting that it’s you.”

“I think there’s a compliment in there, even if I’m acting as your nurse.” She laughed softly as her heart pounded at his confession. Perhaps she was special to him.

“There is a compliment,” he murmured. Slowly, he turned to her. “Your father loved you. Why do you suppose he didn’t leave you an inheritance or even a dowry?”

It was on the tip of her tongue to scold him, but Grace relaxed. She’d never spoken any of it aloud. Perhaps it would ease the pain if she told someone. Plus, with Dane ill, he would never remember their conversation.

“Stewart went to London for the reading of the will. When he returned, he called me into my father’s study, where he sat at Father’s desk.” She swallowed the hurt that had lodged in her throat. “He said that Father had been a reckless gambler and had lost everything. Stewart offered to send me to Northumberland to stay with his great-aunt. There was a farmer who had agreed to marry me.”

“Please,” he drawled. “You with a farmer in Northumberland? That’s like marrying the sun to a rock. All that heat wasted on something that couldn’t appreciate how extraordinary its rays are.”

“That’s a sweet thing to say.” She looked at their clasped hands. There was no place else she’d rather be than by Dane’s side, particularly when he was ill. She considered it a gift if she brought him comfort. If she had married Dane, how many evenings would they have spent just like this, sharing intimate details? She couldn’t think that. It would make her ill, probably more so than Dane was currently. “Stewart told me I couldn't return home if I didn’t marry the farmer. Hope agreed.”

“You should have lived with me.”

She placed her free hand over the middle of her chest. The memories still caused her heart to ache. “Hope told me that I should have married you. That I was a fool to have let you go.”

“We all make mistakes, and you’re not a fool. You never have been.” Dane’s eyes were closed. “I shouldn’t have let you go.”

She stilled for a moment. He was the one who had broken their engagement. Not her. Perhaps the fever impacted his memory.

“Tell me that they didn’t turn you out.”

“They did.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. It hurt to say the words. Her own family did not care that she had no one to help her. Nor did they care that she was frightened. “I went to London and stayed in a church that first night.”

“Oh my God, Gracie. Tell me you didn’t.” The anguish in his voice took her by surprise. “You should have come to me.” He sat up and turned to her. “Were you by yourself? I should have never left you that day in our field.”

“Dane, hush.” She pressed a kiss to his forehead. It was somewhat cooler but still warm. “Here’s something you might find amusing. I imagined ghosts rising from the crypts and brushing past me that night.” She chuckled softly. “That made me realize I could not stay on my own. I needed help. The next day, I visited a friend from finishing school and stayed with her until I found an acceptable matron from whom I could rent a room. Then I went to a jeweler and sold my mother’s pearl necklace for money.” It had been the one her father had given her mother to celebrate Grace’s birth. “After that, I started my business. Discreetly, of course.”

“Of course,” he echoed.

The room was silent except for the crackle of the logs in the fireplace.

Out of nowhere, Dane broke the quiet that surrounded them. “The necklace? It was the one with the sapphires?” Dane asked.

“Yes. I’m surprised you remember.” She sniffed as tears threatened. “I had planned to give it to my daughter…but that wasn’t to be.”

Dane let go of her hand and pulled her near. The warmth of his body was a comfort she didn’t know she needed.

“I remember everything. As soon as we both feel better, I’m going to wring your brother-in-law’s neck. Then I’m going to find that farmer and give him a piece of my mind. The very idea that he thought I would give you up.” He huffed a breath. “Then I’ll find your necklace for you. You can still give it to our daughter.”

She smiled slightly but didn’t argue with him. When he was well, he wouldn’t remember asking her to marry him or referring to their daughter. But for tonight, she’d pretend that he was still hers.

“I have a confession,” he murmured.

“What is it?”

“On that field, I walked away from you before you could walk away from me. You see, I never felt love from my parents. It's more like apathy and rejection. As a young lad, I promised myself I’d never suffer through that again with anyone I loved.” He pulled her tighter against him. “I loved you so much, Gracie.” He closed his eyes as if in pain. “When you wrote me that letter and asked to meet, I was scared. I knew you were going to leave me. So, I thought if I let you go first, it wouldn’t hurt as much.” He leaned his head against hers as they stared at the fire. “I was wrong. It hurt more.”

Her eyes brimmed with tears. One fell but thankfully, it was on the cheek he couldn’t see. She wanted to gather him in her arms and give him everything he’d been denied and had denied for himself. When she remembered that day, there was a wildness, a defensiveness in him that she didn’t recognize. It was his fear of losing her. Why hadn’t she seen that? They’d always been there for each other ever since they were children. And she let him ride away without even fighting for him or for them. Regret for all their loss of not having each other through the years threatened to crush her.

Quiet descended again.

“I wasn’t going to leave you that day.” She sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Or at least, that hadn’t been my plan.”

“Hmm.” Dane cleared his throat as if waking up from a cat nap. “The more time we’re together, the more I think we can find our way back to each other. That’s why I always want to kiss you.”

She was instantly wide awake. Dane Ardeerton was a constant mystery. A part of her heart would always belong to him, but she had never dared to hope that he still cared for her the way she cared for him.

Yet, he still was cavorting with women on his lap.

He turned and looked at her. “Did you know that I named my cat after you?”

“No, you didn’t. Your cat’s name is Dancer.” She released her breath. His changing the subject meant either he didn’t remember what he’d just said, or he didn’t want to delve into the subject any further. That was for the best. She had her own goals, and buying her own home was her first and foremost concern. Dane Ardeerton would never change. He’d proven that tonight. “Honoria told me that your cat is a wild thing that tortures Emmy to no end.”

“Ack, Dancer is still a kitten. He’s just defining his territory,” he murmured. “D-a-n for Dane, and c-e for Grace. I added the ‘r’ because it fit his personality.” He chuckled slightly. “He dances sideways before he attacks.

The room grew quiet again.

Her heart pounded, but she forced herself to ask the question. “What happened to Matthew?”

“I dismissed him.” He pried one eye open and regarded her. “I know you enjoyed him. Frankly, I was a bit jealous. I cut a finer leg than he does,” he scoffed. “But I didn’t dismiss him for his legs. He tried to sell secrets about me to a gossip rag. I paid the editor to keep them quiet. I will not tolerate disloyalty.”

“Do you know why he needed money?” She played with the edge of the cover and refused to look at him for fear he’d see the truth on her face.

“It didn’t make any difference. I paid his wages, and he, in essence, was selling me. Hence, he betrayed me.” He sighed and wrestled with the covers. “I don’t want to talk about him anymore.”

And neither did she. Her only salvation from earning his disgust would be if he fell in love with Athena. The thought crushed her. What had she been thinking? She should have never agreed to Marbury’s proposal.

“Grace?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m done not taking risks for the people I love.” His voice faded. “I’m loyal and protective to those I love and who love me.”

What balderdash. She fought the tears that threatened to fall. She couldn’t forget that he had women hanging all over him that very night.

Dane’s soft snores fell into a rhythm that matched her breath. She had never experienced such an intimate yet bittersweet moment before. They could have had the life she had always dreamed of, but from his words, she knew that it was too late to try to find what they had once shared.

“There’s one thing you should know, you sweet, aggravating man,” she murmured. “Even though I shouldn’t, I’ve loved you always and will forever, even though you have a nasty habit of having naked women on your lap.”