Page 21

“Yes. Allow me to handle this.” Victor took the plate of sandwiches from Juliana and turned toward Tobias.

“I insist, sir. Come, make yourself a plate. You can retire over there, and we shall help ourselves, only calling you if necessary.” Victor pointed at the tree Tobias had claimed as a resting spot earlier.

Warmth spread through Victor’s chest at the man’s surprised—but appreciative—smile. But Tobias’s gratitude didn’t affect him as much as what he witnessed on Juliana’s face. Admiration? Trust? Whatever it was, it shifted something inside him, like sunlight breaking through overcast skies.

And although Victor was pleased he had won favor in Juliana’s eyes, part of him worried he had paved a way to heartbreak for her.

A whirlwind of emotions raced through Juliana: eagerness and excitement to spend time with Victor, embarrassment over her horrible faux pas with Tobias, and elation that Victor had come to her rescue, salvaging the situation and making her feel...she didn’t want to say the word.

Yet, it hung heavy in the air before her. How would she be able to keep her feelings for Victor from showing? Each time he looked at her, her heart melted. He made her feel special. Cared for.

Loved.

Juliana wasn’t a stranger to being loved. Her mother adored her, her father had doted on her, and Drake, for all his bluster and calling her brat, wanted her happiness above all else.

But a family’s love was different from a man who pretended to be a suitor.

And therein lay the issue. Her courtship with Victor was a pretense, employed to spur Juliana’s acceptance into society—and find a suitable husband.

Who wasn’t Victor.

Victor, whose kindness outweighed his handsome face. Victor, who had a purpose in life, who aspired to be more than just a soon-forgotten viscount.

Whatever she felt for Victor had grown too big, too risky, and she dared not name it, for naming it might make it real. She’d been teetering on the edge of a precipice for some time, and his kindness had tilted the balance. Was she falling, or simply letting go?

The enormity of her feelings both liberated and restrained her, the juxtaposition of it almost comical if her heart was not at stake.

Her affection for him would give credence to their pretense of courtship, but at the same time, she must keep her feelings in check enough so Victor wouldn’t discern the truth.

She must walk the fine line between allowing her feelings to show enough, but not too much.

And in doing so, she would guard her own heart from being crushed by Victor’s rejection.

Stretched out on the blanket, Victor nibbled on another orange slice.

He grew pensive, studying her with that penetrating blue gaze of his.

“Pretend or not, here we are courting, and you asked why I wanted to be an artist, but I never asked you what dreams you have for your future. Do you want more than marriage and children?”

The piece of cheese Juliana had been chewing seemed to lodge in her throat as she swallowed. “If you knew my dream, you would not worry that I would find your dream ridiculous.”

His eyes widened, and he propped himself on one elbow. “Now you must tell me.”

She fingered a loose string on the blanket, not daring to meet his eyes. “It’s not a very ladylike ambition. I had little hope to pursue it before, but now that Drake is a duke...well, it seems impossible. I’ve already embarrassed him enough.”

“You have me too intrigued not to tell me. Please, Juliana. I promise I will keep your confidence.”

Deep inside, she knew she could trust him—not only to keep her confidence but to not laugh.

“Well, since you were so brave to share with me, it seems only fair I tell you. As you’re aware, I love horses.

When Drake left for the military and until my father died, I continued to help care for the horses on Lord Stratford’s estate.

When my father died, we moved near an estate where the owner bred horses, and he allowed me to go riding whenever I wished. ”

Victor waited patiently, but from the line forming between his brows, he no doubt wondered where her story was leading.

“He told me I had a good eye for horseflesh. Once, when I was brushing out the mare I had taken out for a ride, he asked me which stallion I would choose to mate with her.”

Heat flooded her cheeks at Victor’s incredulous expression, but she barreled forward.

“He was teasing me, of course. However, I gave his question serious thought, and, apparently, my answer surprised him. Not only was it a pairing he had considered, but my reasons given impressed him. From then on, he asked my opinion about which stallion to mate with which mare. I became very good at it. Two of the foals went on to become champions. From that moment on, breeding horses became my dream.”

“Well, that’s fabulous.” He grinned at her. “And a most unusual pursuit for a woman.”

She tore her gaze away. “It doesn’t matter now. At one time before Drake became duke, I thought perhaps I would marry a gentleman farmer who would also share my passion for horses and together.. .well.”

Victor scooted closer to her and took her hand in his. “Juliana. Don’t give up on your dream. It’s still possible. There are many aristocratic gentlemen who put great store in fine horseflesh.”

“Ones who would welcome a wife with such aspirations?” She shook her head. “From what I’ve seen and learned about the ton , he would be a most unusual man indeed.” She forced a smile in hopes of conveying appreciation for his efforts to give her hope, no matter how false.

They finished their refreshment, conversing on less serious subjects as Tobias cleared the area of the remaining food, plates, and blanket.

Once she resumed her pose—with considerably less touching from Victor—their remaining time flew by.

As Victor worked diligently, Juliana occupied herself, imagining herself on Victor’s arm at upcoming events.

Honoria had mentioned a ball toward the end of the Season to celebrate Kitty’s birth.

Juliana hoped Victor would still be pretending to court her and perhaps they would share a waltz.

Although she struggled at the piano, she had taken to dancing as if she were born to it.

The dancing master, who had also worked with Drake, said she had a natural athletic ability, perhaps due to her expertise on horseback.

Shadows lengthened, and Victor paused and peered upward. “We should finish for the day and return. I think I have enough of Sunshine to continue working indoors tomorrow.” He swirled one of his brushes in an odd smelling liquid, then wiped it with a cloth. “If that’s agreeable with you.”

As much as Juliana loved having moments alone with Victor—except for Tobias, of course—spending any time with him, even with her mother present, was better than spending no time with him.

“Of course.” She gave Sunshine a pat on her neck.

“There will be some carrots and maybe an apple for you when we get back.”

“She earned them.” Victor pulled another canvas from his satchel.

“What is that for? I thought we were finished?”

With a smile that said her question was not as silly as she’d first imagined, Victor held it out, showing her the protrusions on the back edges of the blank canvas.

“To protect the wet canvas. Small pieces of wood create a gap and keep the paint from touching the surface. I place the painted canvas surface against the back of the blank canvas. Then I tie it in place with cloth strips.”

Oh. He was so brilliant!

Once Victor finished packing up his supplies and the canvas—which he wouldn’t allow her to see—he strode forward, giving a nod toward Sunshine. “Do you need a boost up?”

Although she’d used a mounting block when they’d left, she’d planned to simply place her foot in the stirrup and pull herself up into the saddle. But the prospect of Victor’s hands around her waist banished any desire to prove her independence.

She nodded. “That would be helpful.”

They stood face-to-face. Victor reached for her, but frowned and pulled back, scratching his chin. “Um. How should I...? Perhaps if you turn around?”

“Oh. Of course. I’m such a ninny.” Turning, she faced Sunshine, preparing herself for the onslaught of sensations when Victor touched her.

Yet, try as she might, her knees buckled a little when Victor’s hands found her waist. She sucked in a breath long enough to keep her wits about her and slide her foot into the stirrup and swing into position.

Victor’s lips twitched in a tiny smile as he handed her the reins. She jerked her gaze away lest he see the turmoil brewing inside her, but his fingers lingered against hers, and neither pulled away.

They rode back in relative silence, only speaking to greet people they passed. There was no awkwardness between them, reminding Juliana of the quiet communication Drake and Honoria shared with each other.

Was it enough if only one person loved? It was a question Juliana was reluctant to ponder—for she may not like the answer.