Page 55 of A Match Made in Hell

I cough and splutter as we’re carried away downstream.

The river catches us all in its wake, demons and humans alike swimming for the surface as the blood surges down the tunnel. It rises higher and higher, catching the skull lanterns on the walls, sweeping them into its path, and we’re plunged into darkness.

I have to get back. I swim against the current, towards the gates, needing to check no demons from the other side are in this river with us, but it’s too strong, and before I know it we’re flowing into the entrance chamber.

It’s large enough in here that the blood level descends, a sea finally hitting the shore, and we’re deposited on the floor sopping wet and dripping red, blood sloshing at our feet.

The Sorter’s laughing.

A second later, that snake I caught a glimpse of shoves its head through the open doorway.

It’s so large it can’t get any further, its body wedged in the tunnel behind it.

Asphodel trembles, like it can’t withstand accommodating a demon of this size.

Every time it wriggles, rock descends in chunks that land in haphazard heaps around the base of its head.

Still on my knees, I can sense its tail writhing beneath me, like the serpent has the whole of Asphodel surrounded, coiled in its thick grasp. Its tongue flicks out, longer than my whole body, and captures the nearest human.

They’re swallowed whole. I can’t bring myself to move.

What do I do? What do I do what do I do what do I do?

Keep the divide. I wasn’t given a chance. And now the two worlds are colliding.

The demons take this as their opportunity to fight back.

With hisses and roars, they tear my ropes from their wrists and ankles, leaving scars on their flesh that sizzle like meat that’s just been taken off the grill.

A human gets backhanded. Another has their neck torn into by a pair of fangs.

Harper crawls across the floor, clutching her stomach.

Panic claws at me. I should’ve waited until I was stronger. Maybe I shouldn’t have done this at all. The voices in my head roar, louder than ever, no barrier between us now the gates are wide open.

Hurt them. Tear them apart. You know you want to. You enjoyed it when you killed Aric, didn’t you? A human’s screams would be so much sweeter.

I shake my head. No. I killed Aric because I had to. I reach for my power to conjure more rope. Use it to push away a demon lunging for Harper. The voices scream, furious I’m ignoring them.

The snake inches a little further out of the tunnel.

Help it. Wouldn’t it be easier to give up, to let it in? You look tired, Willow .

Well, excuse me if I didn’t get much sleep last night. I search for Sath, but I can’t locate him amid the chaos. Everything is a blur: a flash of silver, a clank of steel, a splatter of red. Screams and curses are hurled in every direction until they become an indecipherable cacophony of noise.

If you let the humans die, it’ll go quiet . I grit my teeth, willing them to shut up. Instead, they get louder, a chorus sounding out a refrain. We’ll make you a deal . Anything you desire, it’s yours. Let the snake in .

‘I won’t.’

A human is tossed from one side of the chamber to the other. They land with a heavy crack that I feel in my own bones, and I want this over, I need this to be over. My cheeks are wet. I can’t let any more humans end up in the Void, or worse.

But they will.

Because there’s no wind. No promised vortex.

I’ve messed up. I shouldn’t be surprised. Good Decision Willow can make all the choices she likes; she still needs the rest of me to follow through.

You should give up. Your duty was to protect them, and you’ve failed. You always fail in the end, don’t you?

Flames burst from my arms. I’ve failed, and the gates are open, and there’s no divide at all, because I am my sins and they live within me. I can’t stop the planes from merging because I’m not pure and good and never have been.

All I’ve ever wanted is to be proud of you.

I clutch my hands to my ears. Not her. Not now.

This is all your fault. If you had been better, more, everything I asked you to be –

‘Shut up ,’ I scream. She’s the problem; I know that now. I don’t need to listen to her any more.

‘Willow.’ Sath’s voice sounds far away, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve failed, I’ve failed, I’ve failed.

Someone screams. Multiple someones. I sit ankle-deep in the blood of those who died in Tartarus, all too aware that soon it will be mixed with the blood of Asphodel too, and there’s not a thing I can do about it.

I’ve damned us all. It’s too much. My body floods with anger, with despair, and flames engulf me.

‘Willow!’

A head is deposited at my feet. I stare at its glassy eyes, its open mouth, as my flames burn hotter.

What a pathetic human, letting itself get killed. Weren’t they supposed to be following my orders?

My gaze snaps up. No one is following my instructions. They should be hurting the demons, not the other way round. I lash out whips of flame, ensnaring the nearest demons, dragging them off the humans they were about to devour. I bind their ropes tighter before sending out another blast of fire.

I can’t hear over the roaring in my head. The gates are open. I have to get the demons through the gates. Tear. Hurt. Kill .

Yes. Yes, I want to do that. Tear. Hurt. Kill. If they’re not being called back, I’ll have to shove them back, by any means necessary. But the snake’s blocking the path; I need to kill the snake.

Are you sure? You said it yourself, these humans are pathetic.

I didn’t say that. Did I say that? It’s hard to differentiate the voices in my head from my own voice, to know what’s me and what’s them. All our thoughts bleed into one. Everything is muddled; my temple pounds. I snap the neck of a demon. Mum’s voice sounds again, louder than the rest.

It’ll stop when you give in. You can have everything you want, so long as you don’t kill the snake . I’d be so proud of you, Willow.

She has a point. The snake isn’t causing any harm. It just wants to feed. The humans, the stupid, screaming humans, they’re the ones at fault.

Tear. Hurt. Kill . My hand closes on another neck, this one soft, hairless, almost like – I blink. It’s a human. I don’t want to hurt the humans. Do I?

‘Willow!’

Why is that man calling my name?

I let the human go, rubbing my temples, confused. Tear. Hurt. Kill .

‘Willow.’ Someone touches my arm. They’re familiar, I think. Blindly, I reach towards them, wanting to be closer. They tug me into them. I breathe in their fresh scent and allow it to dim my power. ‘Remember, your sins don’t control you.’

Sath. It’s Sath. I know Sath. I know the anger more.

I know this unspeakable rage at the injustice of what’s happening in this room; nobody here deserves to be torn apart, and yet they are, and I led them here, it’s my fault, mine, and the demons are using that against me, making me think things I don’t want to think.

You failed, Willow. Give in.

I look at Sath, desperately trying to focus on his face, but it’s blurry and distorted as the demons tell me how worthless I am, how the only way to make it better is to make everyone else hurt as much as I am. I want to. I want to blow this whole place up, if only so it’ll be over.

‘I can’t stop them,’ I whisper.

‘Yes, you can.’ He brings my hand to his chest, allowing me to feel the thunder of his heart beneath my palm. ‘You have one of these too. It might be fused with that wicked thing from Tartarus, but it’s there, and it feels more than sin. You can do this, Willow.’

The voices scream louder. Hurt him. He’s lying to you. He’s always lied to you .

That voice, I know, isn’t mine. I forgave Sath.

I did. And if anyone’s going to make me feel something more than this, it’s him.

Ignoring everything going on around us, I pull him to me, kissing him, letting him remind me there are things in this world that are good and pure and worth saving.

That he believed in me before anyone else did. That I believe in myself now .

There must be blood on his face, because his lips taste like metal, but I don’t care.

He holds me against him, kissing me like he’d give me his own heart if he could.

And with that kiss, I remember. Feelings of warmth, joy, happiness, banishing those voices telling me those things don’t exist any more.

It smothers their negativity. I see the gates in my mind’s eye; see booted feet failing to cross the threshold that was so close to snapping apart.

I see a wind pick up, gathering dust in its wake and spilling out into the tunnel.

I smile against Sath’s mouth and pull back. ‘Thank you.’

Don’t thank him. Let the snake through. You’d make me proud. Wouldn’t you like that?

I’ve spent far too long trying to make a disembodied voice proud.

No more.

When I’m me, I can succeed.

I unleash my powers, my gaze never leaving Sath’s as I bind each and every demon with ropes of fire, black and flaming.

I’m not overwhelmed, not this time. I have myself.

Sath. The humans too, because they’re looking at me with wonder and gratitude and the belief that maybe we’ll get it right this time.

Even if we don’t, we’ll try again. We have an eternity of second chances.

Once the demons are tied, the humans regaining command of their reins, I turn to the snake.

It’s still blocking the way to the gates, forked tongue seeking its next victim. I’ll have to burn it, turn it to ash, without becoming overwhelmed.

The voices are quiet now.

I throw out more flames, engulfing the snake, and with every burst of fire I think of the future before us. Peace. Laughter. Happiness. Sath and I will finally make proper use of the portals, and we’ll travel the world.