Page 116 of A Light in the Darkness

I bite my tongue, not bothering to remind Claire that she hasn’t even given the baby up to me yet. Something about the way the sisters look at each other tells me that this is something they both need, and I decided long ago that I will always put Claire’s needs above my own. Besides, when all is said and done, there is plenty of time to familiarize my daughter with the comfort of her father’s arms.

Violet opens her mouth and closes it, nervous. “I don’t… I’ve never held one before.”

“Perfect time to start.” Claire assures her.

“Go wash your hands,” Rhea instructs her. I’m impressed that she’s not jealous at the fact Claire offered her up to Violet first. “And then come sit down.”

Violet does as she’s instructed, a little bit of a skip in her step as she goes. I glance at Claire as her sister scrubs her hands like a surgeon and find that she’s closed her eyes for a moment, but her smile abates any of the anxiety I can feel over her exhaustion. When Violet sits, Claire opens her eyes and sits up, prepared to pass our daughter off. I take her instead, letting her relax a moment longer.

Elena wiggles just a little as I disturb her from her deep slumber, irritation obvious on her tiny little face.

I can’t explain it but holding her in my arms even for a moment feels like the last piece of a puzzle sliding into place. It feels like the world and all of its problems folding for once, bowing aside to grant us this moment of perfect peace.

“Oh my God,” Claire gasps softly as I hand my daughter off to Violet, as Rhea instructs her how to old her arms and support Elena’s head. When I turn back to her, Claire’s eyes are shining, but she isn’t crying this time. “I forgot you haven’t even held her yet. I’ve had her this whole time.”

Rhea’s head snaps up, but she only laughs when she sees me shake my head. I sit on the edge of the bed with her, close enough that I can snatch my daughter back at a moment’s notice if I needto. But as I watch the light flicker on in Violet’s eyes, I’m sure that I won’t have to.

I don’t know much about twins, except I’m glad we didn’t have them. There was a moment where the doctor thought she heard a second heartbeat, which was enough to strike terror into both of us. Though, in hindsight, when you go from zero kids to fourteen in a single year, what’s one more?

Watching Violet, and watching Claire watch Violet, I start to wonder what sort of effect something like this has on healing… If she had any doubts about how she looks like she was made for this, they must be erased when Claire literally watches herself with Elena.

It’s perfect in every way I never could have imagined. It’s unusual and chaotic, particularly when another knock on the door signifies Wes, Dimitri, and Michael’s arrival. As they join us in the room and Rhea calls next on my daughter, as if any of the others were going to fight for the chance, I thread my fingers through Claire’s and press a kiss to them, smiling as she sighs contentedly.

“See?” I tell her, gesturing to the visitors in the room. It’s just a small sample of the people in our life—just a small part of our family. “She’ll be the most protected girl in the whole world.”

Claire laughs, and I’m not sure she even understands how seriously I mean it.

But of course, I do.

Claire’s whole life, she’s longed for a family. And while I’m sure it looked different in her mind, I think the reality probably played out better.

I know it did for me.