Page 81 of A Letter to the Last House Before the Sea

Daisy raised her eyebrows to the sky. ‘There you go again, being picky. Ooh, these seagulls are a total menace.’ She shooed away a gull who had swooped down for the scattered crisps. ‘I’m going home first thing tomorrow morning to start the preparations for Elsa’s party and you can come back with me. There, it’s sorted!’

Daisy’s smug smile and assumption that she would go home the next day made Lettie squirm.

‘Maybe. I’ve still got my return train ticket.’

‘Wouldn’t the car be easier?’

It would be easier, thought Lettie, taking a bite of the remaining flapjack. It would be easier all round to go back to her life in London and to get another customer care job and to go back to looking after Daisy’s kids and her parents. Far easier than moping after some amorphous new career and new kind of life with new people. Corey’s face swam into her mind and she shook her head to try and dislodge his disappointed expression that seemed to haunt her thoughts these days.

‘Can I let you know in the morning?’

‘I suppose so but there isn’t much to think about. You have to come home.’

Daisy sounded so panicky all of a sudden, Lettie grabbed her hand.

‘Why are you so desperate for me to come back to London?’

‘I’m not,’ said Daisy, snatching her hand away.

‘You’re so desperate you came all the way to Devon to persuade me.’

‘I needed a break,’ said Daisy, sounding like a sulky teenager. ‘And I came to keep you company.’

‘I didn’t need your company.’

‘That’s nice! I drive four hours to see you and you throw my good deed in my face.’

Lettie took a deep breath. This was all getting out of hand.

‘I just want to understand what’s going on with you, Daisy,’ she said, as calmly as she could.

‘What’s going on with me? What’s going on with you, more like.’ Daisy got to her feet and started pacing across the grass, with the sea behind her. ‘You’ve been different ever since Iris died. You run away from home and go all Sherlock Holmes over Iris’s past. Then you switch off your phone – I’m not an idiot – and you tell me that you don’t have a job any more and now you don’t want to come back with me tomorrow.’

‘You’re concerned about me, which is lovely, but there’s more to it than that. I can tell.’

Daisy stopped pacing. ‘I’m frightened you’re going to move away from us. There! Are you happy now?’

Lettie got to her feet, scattering crumbs across the grass.

‘Why does that frighten you?’

‘Because we need you at home.’

Your family take advantage. That’s what Iris had told her – and it was true. Lettie pulled herself up taller.

‘Sure. You need me to pick up your kids from school and babysit and take them to their weekend activities. Mum needs me to sort out her supermarket trips and help cook Sunday lunch and arrange any work that needs doing in their house.’

‘But you have the time to do all that.’

‘I have the time?’ Lettie could feel her composure starting to slip. ‘I have the time because I don’t have a life, Daisy. And one big reason why I don’t have a life is because I’m always so busy sorting out the Starcross family.’

‘I thought you loved your family.’

‘Of course I do. I love spending time with Elsa and Danny, and you and Mum and Dad. But sometimes it feels that all my life consists of, apart from jobs that I don’t enjoy, is running round after you lot. You lot who think you know what’s right for me.’

‘That’s a bit harsh,’ protested Daisy, with a frown.

‘It’s a bit harsh but true. Unlike you, I don’t have a perfect life.’