Page 16 of A Lady’s Lesson in Scandal (The Secret Life of a Lady #2)

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Drake was surrounded by lemon and cotton, warmth and soft curves, strong arms holding him tight, silky hair tickling his cheek.

What is happening to me?

They were supposed to be fucking, but instead, she was hugging him. It was too much. He was prepared for lust, friction, heat. But his heart wasn’t ready for comfort. Sanctuary. Kindness.

He froze. His lungs stopped working. His heart halted. His mind stalled. She rubbed one hand down his back, tripping over the uneven scar tissue.

‘I’m so sorry, Beau. For what they did to you. For the pain you suffered. If I could take it away, I would.’ Her soft words wound around his heart as securely as her arms wrapped around his body.

Drake tried to swallow, but a rock was lodged in his throat. His whole body began to shake.

What is happening to me?

He was losing his carefully cultivated control. He was drowning.

‘It’s okay. You’re safe with me. I’m not going anywhere.’

Soft lips pressed against his cheek, and he was lost. He wrapped his arms around her strong, sweet body and held onto her like a desperate man clinging to his last hope.

That’s what she is. My last hope. My only hope.

‘I’ve got you, Beau.’

They stayed that way for minutes, or millennia, as he shook like a leaf in the winter wind. When his body stilled, and he could breathe again, Millie loosened her grip and leaned back to look at him. His face was wet.

Goddamned tears.

He couldn’t remember the last time he cried. But she wiped them away, taking with her some of his shame. ‘Is there anything that helps the pain?’

My leg, or everything else?

Focusing on the leg seemed safest.

‘I massage it. With linseed oil. It helps to stop the scars from becoming tight. Eases the muscles a bit.’

Millie nodded. ‘Get the oil and lie on the bed.’

Drake’s brow drew down in confusion. ‘Now? Why?’

‘Because, you silly man. You’re hurting. I want to ease some of your pain. I’m going to rub your leg for you.’

Drake was never at a loss for words. He always knew exactly what to say, even if it wasn’t something people wanted to hear. But she flummoxed him. He was speechless.

He was standing naked in front of her, a raging cockstand making it difficult to think, and yet she wanted to hold off being ravished in order to rub medicinal oil on his massacred leg.

She’s mad. I’m going to wed an insane woman.

‘Go on. The sooner we deal with your leg, the sooner we can move on to rubbing other things.’ She winked at him.

What kind of alternate world have I stumbled into?

Not only did Millie show no signs of revulsion at his brutalised body, she did so while making sexy puns and eyeing his cock like it was a vanilla ice she wanted to lick. It made no sense.

Seriously, what is happening to me?

He shook his head, trying to clear his foggy thoughts.

‘Unless you want me to go searching through your drawers myself?’ Millie raised her brows, putting both hands on her hips.

Jesus, her breasts are amazing.

And the sooner he got the oil, the sooner he could touch them.

Decision made.

Drake turned and limped to his dresser.

‘I must say, it’s almost as much fun to watch you leave as it is to see you coming.’ Millie gave him a wicked smile when he turned back to determine if she was mocking him. ‘You might not be an arse, but you certainly have a beautiful one, Major General Drake.’

Drake retrieved the oil and turned back. ‘You are a wicked woman, Millicent Whittenburg.’

‘So I’ve been told,’ Millie said.

‘Wicked redheads are my weakness, Miss Whittenburg. One in particular.’

She smiled as he walked over to the bed and pulled back the covers. He patted the mattress in invitation, and Millie hiked her skirts to climb up from the opposite side.

Once Drake was settled on his back, she shuffled over to him, hindered by her long nightdress.

Drake pressed his back against the pillows, trying to relax. But watching her breasts sway as she crawled across the feather mattress made his erection jerk.

Her gaze flew to his lap.

‘It looks like he wants to be next.’ She addressed his penis. ‘You’re going to have to wait your turn, sir.’

A bubble of mirth burst from Drake’s chest in a rusty laugh. ‘I’ve never had a lady talk to my cock before.’

Millie’s cheeks darkened with a blush. ‘Obviously, none of them knew what they were doing.’ She tipped up her chin in a stubborn expression he was growing to love and held her hand out expectantly.

‘Obviously,’ he agreed, handing over the oil.

Without another word, she pulled open the stopper, poured oil into her hand, resealed the bottle, and rubbed her hands together. He waited for her to hesitate before touching his leg, but she was bold, even in this.

She put both hands on his thigh, rubbing the linseed oil into his skin before she started to knead the tight muscles.

God, that’s good.

Drake groaned, and Millie paused.

‘Too hard?’

‘No. Perfect.’

She nodded again and kept rubbing. Her hair fell around her shoulders in fiery waves. Drake reached over and toyed with the ends, his hand moving to her shoulder, finding the dip of her spine, and following the bumps down. He stroked her back as she stroked his thigh. It was a strange amalgamation of peaceful arousal until her fingers brushed the side of his cock.

His body tensed.

‘Is that better?’ she asked, her eyes heavy-lidded, her voice rough with need. She licked her bottom lip.

Drake’s hand tightened around her side, pulling her on top of him. She let out a surprised squeak. He cupped her cheek with his rough palms, letting his fingers glide over smooth skin until he buried them in her thick hair. Pulling her closer, their lips almost touched.

‘Better,’ he rasped before leaning forward and claiming her mouth.

Sweet saints and sinners!

Sparring with Drake had been her favourite thing. Now, it was kissing him. He was the very Devil with his tongue, licking, laving, inviting her to tangle with him as he bit her bottom lip hard enough to spark pleasure in her core.

Kissing Franklin had never been like this, but Millie was a quick study. She took a page from Drake’s book, sucking his tongue, then kissing along his jaw and sinking her teeth into his neck.

He growled.

She moaned.

His hands tightened on her hips, pulling her against the thick ridge of his cock.

‘Christ’s teeth,’ she hissed.

‘I had no idea you were religious.’ He rumbled against her temple before grabbing her head and turning her face toward him. He plunged into her depths, licking and nibbling her lips, tangling his tongue with hers, and Millie’s brain scattered into a thousand sparks.

She writhed against him. Her core ached as wet warmth flooded her. The same thing happened on the chaise, but never once with Franklin. Her body was weeping for Drake, readying for him.

‘You are so fucking wet for me.’

Of course he noticed.

The man noticed everything. Her body’s reaction to his hardened flesh only seemed to increase Drake’s passion.

‘This never happened with… er… I mean… I didn’t know I was supposed to until you kissed me… there.’ She spoke around soft kisses pressed to his cheek, his neck, his temple, but her hips kept grinding against him. A sweet pleasure, so sharp she wanted to sob, pulsed between her thighs. Rubbing her core against his granite ridge with focused intent, a tiny fragment of nerves burst with new sparks, each one more intense. The pleasure pulsed outward in concentric circles until every part of her felt the echoes of desire. Thanks to Drake, she knew what was coming, and she wanted it with an intensity that consumed her.

‘Your body is getting ready for me. The slicker you are, the easier it will be, love. Remember, I’m not an arse. I don’t want you to feel anything but pleasure. Just let go.’

Millie pulled back, her fingers brushing over his full bottom lip. ‘Your mouth is sinful. The first time I saw you, I couldn’t stop staring at this lip. I thought, how could such a serious man have such a lewd mouth?’

Drake smiled. Not a twitch of his lips. Not the left corner curling in a smirk. A full-blown smile. Millie almost swooned. ‘Did you enjoy learning exactly how lewd this mouth can be?’

‘Yes.’ She spoke without thought.

‘Would you like another lesson?’

‘I thought perhaps this time, I could…’ If he could bring her such pleasure with his mouth, certainly she could do the same.

His icy gaze sharpened. ‘You want to suck me?’

Millie wasn’t sure exactly what she wanted except to gift him with the same pleasure he’d shown her. ‘You’ll have to tell me what to do.’ She slithered down his body, making space for herself between his legs. Up close, his erection seemed even larger. Ropey veins pulsed beneath his skin. The head of his cock flared a bit as a bead of milk formed at the slit. She leaned forward and licked it, tasting salt.

‘Fuck me, woman.’

‘That is the idea,’ she murmured against his hard flesh.

Drake’s hand was in her hair, squeezing, and she knew he wanted to guide her mouth to where he pulsed with need, but he waited.

‘Are you sure? You don’t have to.’ His voice was harsh with contained desire, but she wanted to see him fly apart.

Millie glanced at him, his jaw clenched, his arms straining with cords of muscle so beautifully defined in the candlelight. ‘I want to.’

He asked if she wanted to suck him, so that is what she would do. Taking the head in her mouth, she widened her lips to wrap around him and sucked him deep.

Dear Lord. How does one breathe while doing this?

Panic threatened, but Drake’s hand guided her, pulling her back a bit.

‘Easy, Millie. Just like that, suck me as deep as you can.’

Applying herself to the task, she found a rhythm. She could only take part of him into her mouth, so she used her hand to grip his root, stroking in tandem. The taste and texture of him fascinated her. Swirling her tongue around his head, another spurt of salty tang coated her mouth. Oddly, the entire affair created a twin ache within her core. She squeezed her thighs together, trying to ease it, but it only increased. When his hand drifted from her head down to grasp a tight nipple and pinch, Millie nearly lost her rhythm. She moaned, the vibrations causing Drake’s whole body to tighten.

‘Jesus, Millie. You’ll finish this before we’ve begun.’ Drake grabbed her shoulders, pulling her off and dragging her up his granite torso.

‘Are you… I mean to say, I thought you would…’ She wasn’t exactly sure what she thought he would do, but certainly, she expected something similar to the cataclysmic crisis she experienced.

‘I don’t want to spend in your mouth, Millie. Not tonight.’

Her brows drew together as disappointment took hold. ‘Oh. Did I do something wrong?’

Drake repositioned her on his lap, her legs straddling him. His face was tight with strain. ‘You were perfect. Better than my dreams. But I want this to last, and if you kept that up, I wouldn’t be able to wait.’

Millie tried to puzzle out what he wasn’t saying. ‘So, once a man… spends… he can’t do it again?’

Drake’s laughter was more like a wheeze. ‘Not for a bit. But a woman can climax many times. It’s one more way you are superior to us.’ He pressed up with his hips, and she felt the hard length of his cock rubbing through her wet folds.

‘Oh,’ she gasped. The slide of his hot, hard flesh against her sensitive bud was glorious.

‘Did you like that?’

Millie bit her lip. ‘Yes.’

He pressed up again, and she cried out as the blunt head of his cock created silky friction with the cluster of nerves encompassing her world.

He gripped her hips, guiding her as he ground against her wet core once more.

‘Are you ready for me, Millie?’

‘Yes. Please.’

He lifted her hips up and positioned himself at her entrance.

His gaze captured her, swirling with too many emotions to define. ‘Now?’

She bit her lip and nodded.

He pulled her hips down, his cock sliding through her wet channel, stretching her, filling her. It was too much. It wasn’t enough. It was everything.

When he was fully seated in her, he paused, letting her body adjust to his width and length.

Millie took several deep breaths as her internal muscles slowly melted, making space for his invasion. She twitched her hips, the movement eliciting new sparks of pleasure.

‘That’s it. Ride me, Millie.’ He pulled her back up his cock until the head almost came out, then slid his hands up her ribs to hold her breasts. It was clear the next move was hers to make.

She’d never been more grateful for her skills as a horsewoman. This was something she knew how to do. She sank back down, taking him deeper until he hit a sharp and wondrous point within her.

Millie hissed out a curse and pulled up before slamming back down, harder. Drake kneaded her breasts, his clever fingers rolling her nipples into twin points of sensation that only magnified the pleasure pulsing in her core.

‘Yes. Take your pleasure, Millie.’ Drake’s growl of encouragement was like breath on fire, increasing the inferno.

She tightened her thighs around Drake’s narrow hips and revelled in his throaty cry. Perhaps she couldn’t bring him to completion with her mouth, but she would ride them both into glory.

He caught her rhythm, jolting up with his hips each time she sank harder. She braced her hands on his chest and rode him higher, faster, deeper until, on a cry, they both flew off the edge together.

Millie stretched, caught in the hazy in-between world of sleep and waking. She reached for the solid, hard warmth of Drake and he snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her back into his chest and surrounding her with his powerful body.

‘I could stay here forever,’ she murmured, her voice rough from the passionate screams he’d inspired.

‘I’m amenable to your suggestion.’ His rumble vibrated through her chest.

She couldn’t lie to herself any longer. She loved Major General Beaufort Drake. She loved him, and she wanted to create a life with him. Together. As equal partners.

Millie needed to tell him. She couldn’t share her body with this man and not also give him her heart, her mind, her secrets. Surely, after such a raw moment of truth between them, he would understand.

‘I need to tell you something, Beau.’

His body hardened around her. He didn’t say anything, just squeezed his arm tighter around her waist. She took it as a sign of encouragement.

‘There’s a reason I was so good at darts yesterday afternoon.’

Drake ran his nose up her neck, nuzzling the sensitive skin under her ear. ‘I thought I’d have to employ sophisticated tactics of wit and interrogation before you revealed your secrets.’

Millie turned in his arms so she could see his face. ‘No. Just your trust, Beau. That’s what I’m asking for. I need you to trust me. Because I’m going to trust you right now. And we both know, that isn’t easy.’ She felt her heart thumping against her chest as if it wanted to escape. But she needed to tell him everything. Now. He wouldn’t dare betray her. Not after what they’d shared.

‘Tell me.’ His icy-blue eyes flashed in a beam of early-morning sunlight.

‘I have been training as an investigator. For the Queen. And this wedding is part of my mission. Well, the wedding guests, really.’ She could feel her cheeks heating. She was talking too fast, but if she didn’t get it out quickly, her secrets might stay stuck in her throat forever.

Drake stayed quiet. His eyes were unfathomable arctic pools as he waited for her to continue.

Millie fiddled with the sheet, folding it back and forth through her fingers, then flattening it again. ‘I know you work for the prime minister. And I’m guessing we’re after the same man. I want us to work together, Beau. Not just on this mission. But always, with everything. I want this marriage to be real, and close, and strong. So, we need to be partners. Equals. Fighting on the same side, for the same cause.’

There. She said it. All of it. Her heart felt lighter as she took a liberating breath.

Drake released her, sitting up and pulling the sheets with him to cover his lap. He clenched his jaw. ‘You’re investigating Franklin St George?’ His deep voice gave nothing away. But Millie had come too far to back down now.

‘Yes. I am.’

‘And you know the crimes he’s committed?’

‘Kidnapping innocent girls and selling them into the flesh markets in France? Yes.’ Millie sat with him, pulling the sheet to cover herself, feeling more vulnerable than she had with her thighs spread and Drake impaling her.

‘You know how dangerous this man is, that he works for a secret society?’

‘The Devil’s Sons. Yes. I know. And I want to work with you to take them down. Of course, I know you plan on bringing these vile men to the House of Lords. The prime minister still believes they’ll receive justice, but once you speak with Philippa, she’ll explain. Exacting justice upon these bastards ourselves is the only way to ensure no more girls are taken.’ Millie held her breath. He had to agree. Even if it took time to convince him, she knew he wanted justice just as badly as she did. And she trusted him. He would make the right choice. He must.

Drake needed to make a choice. The hardest of his life. He had just spent the last few hours in the arms of the only woman he ever wanted. The truth of his love for Millie crashed through his soul like an anvil, reshaping his priorities, his understanding of life’s meaning, his reason for breathing. And now, she had finally revealed her secret.

Killian was fucking right all along.

Once he knows, he’ll be impossible to live with.

Drake heaved an internal sigh. Millie secretly worked for the Queen, just like her friend – and Killian’s now wife – Hannah.

But Millie trusted him. Revealed everything without him even asking. She wanted to be united with Drake in their bodies and in their mission. It all sounded perfect.

And Drake was going to ruin it. He must.

She was too precious. Her life too valuable to risk at the hands of evil bastards like Franklin St George. Even imagining her standing next to him while he fought the twisted men responsible for this evil filled him with an emotion long-dead. Fear. A warrior full of fear quickly became a dead man. Dead men couldn’t protect the ones they loved. The whole idea of them investigating crimes together was an impossible fairy tale. Now he just needed to explain that to Millie.

Of course, she would be angry. At first. But she was an intelligent woman. She would see reason. She must.

‘Millie, I swore never to love another woman the way I loved Nora.’ He reached out and traced his finger down her smooth cheek, tangling his hand in her hair as it draped over her shoulder. ‘You’ve proven me right.’

Shock parted her lips on a sharp inhalation. She tried to pull away, but he shifted his hand to her shoulder, holding her steady.

‘I don’t understand.’ Tears filled her rich brown eyes.

‘I will never love you the way I loved Nora. Because my love for Nora was like a shadow. An echo ringing hollow and cold. What I feel for you is…’ He swallowed, looking out the window at the rising sun in a winter sky, desperate for inspiration to quantify the infinite in syllables and sounds. A fool’s task. But still, he had to try. ‘What I feel for you is forever. It’s my breath. My beating heart. It eclipses every other emotion. If I have a soul, you are the essence that fills it.’

Tears rolled down her cheek, but her eyes crinkled at the corners in a smile so precious, Drake’s fluttering heart almost flew away.

‘You must know, Beau, it’s the same for me. It’s why I told you everything. Because you are everything to me.’

This next bit was going to be hard. ‘And it’s why I can never allow you to continue your work for the Queen.’

She blinked several times before shifting away from him on the bed. Her soft expression hardened like his lake in December. ‘You won’t allow me?’

Stay calm. Don’t push her.

Of course, she needed time to accept his words. He would give her as much time as she needed. ‘Millie, you must understand. As your husband, it’s my job to decide how best to keep you safe. I love your bold ways, your wild spirit, but in this, you need to see reason.’

Millie clenched her teeth. ‘You aren’t my husband yet. And you want me to see reason? Because what I’m suggesting isn’t reasonable?’

‘It’s reasonable for you to expect that we are equals in all other things, but you must see how impossible it is for you to fight alongside me.’

‘I must understand that I’m unreasonable. I must see that our equality is impossible. Is that what you’re trying so desperately to explain to me? All the things I must agree to when I also agree to marry you?’

Drake put his hands out. ‘Calm down, please.’

‘Calm down? Now you’re telling me I need to calm down?’ Her husky voice rose a decibel.

Shit. That was unwise.

All of Drake’s alarm systems went off. He had faced many threats, innumerable dangers, and his body was telling him this situation was lethal. He needed to get out. Run. But he wasn’t going to leave until she understood. ‘Millie, you are strong and brave, but you are still just a woman. You cannot possibly fight a man with the same speed, strength, and skill of a trained warrior.’

Millie’s burst of laughter was sharp and hard. Much like her gaze. ‘I’m just a woman.’ Every time she parroted one of his phrases back to him, he wanted to wince. ‘I recall you telling me about just a woman who killed several soldiers with nothing but a slingshot and her hands. One would presume she fought with superior speed, strength, and skill than the trained warriors she defeated. Perhaps they also told her to calm down right before she flung a rock at their heads.’

Fuck. I am deep in the shits now.

When his soldiers started to panic in the war, often they just needed a strong hand to lead them in the right direction. Perhaps that tactic would be more successful.

He used his firm, no-arguments, major-general voice. ‘I can understand your frustration, Millie. But in this decision, I will not bend.’

Drake expected anger. He expected her to yell. Cry. Perhaps slap at him. He expected the fire of her rage.

He didn’t expect ice.

It hardened around her mouth, turned her limbs rigid, tightened her hands into fists.

No. This is not better. This is much worse. I’ll explain the danger. If she knows I’m just trying to keep her safe, she’ll understand.

‘Millie, these men will kill you without a thought. What kind of husband would I be if I let you walk into that danger?’

‘The kind who trusts his wife to be capable, skilled, resilient, his equal .’

Drake took a deep breath, willing his temper to recede. ‘I will not lose you,’ he growled.

‘You are losing me right now, Drake. Don’t you see that?’

She was killing him. Didn’t she understand he was doing this because of how desperately he loved her? Because the thought of a fucking weasel like Franklin St George touching her, let alone hurting her, drove him to the brink of madness. If he lost Millie, he lost everything.

She shook her head, her fiery hair cascading around her shoulders like a waterfall of lava. ‘Philippa was right.’ She swept the blanket aside, exposing her gorgeous breasts, soft belly, and strong thighs.

His thoughts scattered like leaves in a gale.

She scooted to the edge of the bed, flinging her legs over the side and sliding to the floor. Her muscles flexed and shifted in the most fascinating display of athleticism. Drake’s cock twitched optimistically.

Not likely.

‘Good day, my lord.’ Millie bent over to grab her nightgown where it had fallen, and Drake’s brain seized at the sight. He was too trapped by his stupid lust to move fast enough.

Millie walked across the floor, her red curls brushing over the dimples at the tops of her buttocks. Drake struggled to untangle his legs from the sheets, but by the time he freed himself, her door shut. It was impossible to ignore the loud click of her lock sliding home.

‘Fuck. That could have gone better.’

Drake ran his hand over his spikey hair and blew out a long breath.

What was he supposed to do? Agree to willingly put the most precious thing in his life in lethal danger? Impossible.

She asked me to trust her. But how can I trust fate to keep her safe?

He shook his head. No. She needed some time and space to think this through, and then she would come around to his decision. It was the only way to ensure she stayed here. With him. Safe. Alive. Protected.

Trapped.

His stomach rolled, and Drake sat heavily on the bed.

Dear God. Had he made a terrible mistake?

Have I lost her anyway?

His fluttering heart gave a painful thump.