Page 36 of A Dead Man’s Pulse (Trident Security Omega Team #1)

He paused and swallowed hard. Dakota was stunned. She was horrified by both his story and how she’d attacked him while knowing only a small part of it. “Logan, I’m so—”

His gaze flashed to hers. “Let me finish, please. You can apologize when I’m done.

” She nodded and let him continue. “You know I have PTSD issues and nightmares. Part of the stipulations of my employment with Trident is I have to see a government-approved psychologist, experienced with PTSD, on a regular basis. The one I’m seeing is also a doctor The Covenant uses, as she did her dissertation on the lifestyle.

A little over two weeks ago, I freaked out at the club while it was closed.

I walked in on Roxy and Jake Donovan practicing, and the crack of the whip .

. . well, it was bad. I totally checked out.

Thank God, I didn’t hurt either of them, because I could have.

I wasn’t there . . . I was back in that hellhole .

. . living it all over again and not sure if I’d survive a second time.

“Donovan had gone through some shit when he was younger and had used desensitization therapy with the whip to get through it, before becoming a Whip Master. He suggested I try it. He and Trudy, my therapist, thought it was best if I did it with the Dommes, since our torturers had been male. I’ve had two sessions where I’ve had my back whipped, and they’re also teaching me how to wield it.

I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to do it to another person—I may just stick with the paper targets, but it seems to be working.

I’m not cured—probably never will be—but I think I’m dealing with everything a little better now that I have an outlet for my PTSD.

Enough that I’m going to continue seeing them.

“What you heard this morning . . . Roxy couldn’t meet us.

I was supposed to be whipped again today, but Charlotte didn’t think I was ready not to have a spotter present to read my reactions, so she suggested I practice instead.

But I had a kink in my neck that was bunched into a knot.

She offered to massage it out for me . .

. that’s what you overheard. Yes, we went into one of the playrooms, but nothing happened in there but her massaging my neck.

I swear. Please tell me you believe me.”

“T-that’s what you meant earlier when you said you’d been a dead man.

” When he nodded, Dakota swallowed the thick lump in her throat.

She felt like such an ass. Standing, she knelt in front of him and grasped his hands.

“I believe you, Logan. I-I’m so sorry I didn’t trust you.

” She didn’t wipe away the tears that rolled down, but he pulled one of his hands from hers and did it for her.

“It’s hard for me. With my dad and the guys at work, I’ve always had to prove I belong there.

Men I’ve dated . . . it’s difficult being a female cop.

When they find out what you do for a living, either they’re too intimidated and run for the hills or the first thing out of their mouths is ‘So, do you have your handcuffs on you tonight?’ Yeah, I’ve heard that dozens of times, and it’s still not funny.

As for dating a cop, fireman, or medic .

. . I can’t do that either, because I’d have to admit my submissiveness .

. . it’s who I am . . . and then I’d have to deal with proving myself as a cop all over again.

That’s why I like the lifestyle. I can get what I need without all the other stuff that goes along with dating.

Until I met you. I told you the truth when I said I’d never even had a one-night-stand with anyone on TPD.

This is the first time I’ve ever wanted someone I worked with more than I wanted to prove my worth. ”

His thumb had been caressing her cheek the entire time she’d been talking.

“Oh, Koko. You never have to prove your worth to me. I already know you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

I’ve never said this to another woman before .

. . I swear on my teammates’ graves . . .

I love you, sweetheart. After we catch this bastard, I want to take you out on a date .

. . a real date. One with flowers and candlelight and slow dancing. I want—”

“Say it again.” Her heart had almost stalled when he’d said those three little words she never thought she’d hear from someone she wanted more than her next breath.

“What? I love you?” He tugged on her hand until she stood.

Tossing the peas aside, he pulled her down on top of him, so she was straddling his thighs.

He cupped her cheeks in his hands, making sure she was looking directly at him.

“I’ll say it every minute of every day, if you want me to, until you no longer question the fact that I love you. I. Love. You. Dakota Swift.”

A sob rose in her throat, and she began to cry harder. “I love you too, Logan. I think I fell in love with you when you pulled your white knight routine when those punks were harassing me. I just couldn’t admit it to myself.”

“Oh, sweetheart. Come here.” He drew her closer until his lips met hers. Taking possession of her mouth, he plunged his tongue inside as she surrendered to him . . . the only man she wanted to surrender to ever again. Logan Reese was the other part of her she’d never thought she’d find.

Logan kissed her with abandon. His cock was throbbing, but this time it wasn’t from the pain of being kneed.

It was from the fact he was now harder than he could ever remember being.

He’d once heard that sex with your soul mate was more intense .

. . more incredible than anything a guy could experience.

At the time, he’d laughed it off, thinking it was a crock of shit that romance authors had come up with—not that he’d say that in front of Devon’s wife, who’d made a career out of being a romance author.

But right here and now, with the other half of his heart and soul straddling his lap, he knew he’d been so wrong.

They were still fully dressed, a fact he was about to remedy, and just having her in his arms was already the most amazing feeling in the world.

She loved him—Dakota Swift loved him. And he loved her more than anything or anyone else in the world.

His hands palmed her ass through the sweatpants she’d changed into before they left Heat, and then he stood, lifting her.

Her legs wrapped around his hips as he strode toward her bedroom.

He sucked on her tongue and reveled in her moans.

Kicking the door shut behind him, he propped her against the wall, using his body to pin her in place as his mouth left hers and nuzzled her neck.

“This is no longer sex, sweetheart. I’m going to make love to a woman for the first time in my life . . . I’m going to make love with you.”

“Yessss.” Squirming to get closer to him, Dakota tilted her head to the side, inviting him to nuzzle the sensitive tissue behind her ear. Her fingernails dug into his shoulders, spiking his adrenaline and lust.

Holding her tightly, he stumbled to the bed and followed her down to the mattress.

“Undress me, baby,” he ordered as he began to remove her clothing.

He’d come to love her submissiveness, and from now on, it was his, and his alone.

She would never surrender to any other man again .

. . only him. And he would cherish every second of her submission.

Once they were both completely naked, he rolled onto his back, taking her with him so she was straddling him once more. He cupped her breasts, pushing them together. “Play with those gorgeous nipples, Koko. Pluck and roll them for me.”

She did as she was told, her head dropping back on her shoulders.

Logan trailed his hands down her body, letting one drop to her waiting pussy, the other skimming around to her ass.

He was going to have to get a set of anal plugs soon because he wanted to fuck her ass one of these days.

Even though it was on her yellow limit list, she’d told him she’d never been taken there.

He’d be the first, and hopefully last, man to claim that part of her .

. . it belonged to him . . . she belonged to him.

He ran his fingers over her clit and her soaked labia, gathering up her cream and pushing it backward to where his other set of fingers used it to lubricate her puckered hole.

She moaned loudly as he pleasured her. His thumb pressed gently into her, while he eased two fingers into her heated core, making her gasp.

“Oh, God! Logan!”

Growling, he lifted the hand behind her and smacked her left ass cheek hard, eliciting a yelp from her. “What did you just call me?” Even though the dynamics of their relationship had changed, he still gave her the dominance she craved.

“Sorry, Master.”

“Good girl.” Yeah, he definitely loved being her Dom.

There was plenty more he needed to learn, and he’d continue his training even after this case was over—if it was ever over—but this power exchange, knowing she trusted him and willingly gave him her submissiveness, was heady stuff.

He would do everything in his power to maintain that trust and give her everything she asked for and needed.

Twisting to his side, he placed her on her back. “Hands above your head, Koko.”

She lifted her arms and grabbed hold of the comforter.

His mouth latched onto one breast as he fucked her faster with his fingers.

Sucking, licking, and nibbling on her ripe nipple, he forced her to climb higher and higher.

Her writhing, moaning, and begging increased. “Please! Oh God, please, Sir!”

“Please what, baby?” he whispered against her skin before licking her distended nipple like an ice cream cone. “Tell your Dom what you want . . . what you need.”

“You, Sir! I need you!”