Page 28 of A Cozy Kind of Christmas

TWENTY-FIVE

JILL

Owen would barely look at her. She watched him mingle from person to person, the flames of the bonfire lapping up to the sky and threatening to consume her.

She felt like she was on fire. Maybe she should have just finished it then and there.

His reaction was exactly as she anticipated.

She couldn’t blame him. He was in the right.

She should have told him when she first started daydreaming about an actual house or apartment, someplace that wasn’t on wheels.

Did it make her less of an artist?

Should she want to be an eternal free spirit?

But couldn’t she do that in one place?

She rubbed her hands together for friction and scooted over towards Matt. He’d been a sounding board and like a brother to her for as long as she could remember.

Maybe he’d know what to do or what she could say to salvage this.

But then again, was there anything left to salvage?

If he was this upset about a job offer in San Francisco, she couldn’t imagine how he would react to the news that she was pregnant.

“Hey, birthday guy. How’s the weekend thus far?” She plopped into the chair next to him, reaching for the blanket and wrapping it around her legs. “Lucinda sure knows how to throw a party.”

“Yeah, she loves this kind of stuff.” Matt nodded and sipped his beer, stealing a glance in Meg’s direction before he dragged his attention back to Jill. “It’s what she studied in school.”

“Party planning?” Jill asked. “Isn’t she next in line to run the company?”

“Technically, event management,” Matt clarified. “She wanted to start her own company, but her dad convinced her to come to work for him. And, yep, now she’s in line to be the new CEO of Blazen.”

“Oh.” Jill tried not to let her eyes drift toward Owen, but she couldn’t help it. “Is he stepping down?”

Matt shrugged. “It’s not official, at least as far as I know, but it sounds like he’s already easing into retirement.”

“That must be good for you,” she said carefully. “Are you still enjoying working for them?”

He hesitated, checking over his shoulder to make sure Lucinda wasn’t listening.

Jill followed his gaze.

Lucinda wasn’t paying any attention to Matt. She was locked into a conversation with Meg that looked serious.

Matt lowered his voice. “Let’s just say… I’ve had an offer. But I’m not sure if I’m going to take it yet.”

“Matt, that’s great.” Jill patted his arm. “As in an offer for what—a leadership role? Would that make things awkward with you and Lucinda? It must already be hard to balance working together and being so close.”

He tipped his head to the side, considering his words. “Yeah, I know, sometimes it’s a lot to be working together. It gets hard not to let work seep into everything else.”

“It’s like with me and Owen,” she said, trying to keep her emotions in check.

“When you spend nearly every waking minute with each other, it’s important to carve out space for yourself.

” She glanced in his direction, where he was teaching a group of Matt’s Bend friends an Irish drinking song.

Their arms were locked together as they swayed side to side with their pint glasses.

“Yeah, I guess I’m trying to figure that part out.

” Matt exhaled slowly. “Lucinda and I have spent a lot of time together lately, and I don’t know…

I’m not sure. Maybe it’s too much.” He took a long, slow drink of his beer and leaned closer.

“But hey, is everything cool with you and Owen? I love the guy, but it sounds like van life might be getting a little claustrophobic?”

“Something like that.” She caught Meg’s eye and waved.

“It’s weird, the three of us being together again.

I guess it kind of has me questioning what’s next.

” That much was true, but she was leaving out the important part.

“You know, it’s like almost a decade has gone by in the blink of an eye, and now, suddenly, we’re all thirty.

To tell you the truth, I thought we might be married and having babies by now, but I’m still figuring it out.

I keep waiting for the moment where I finally feel like an adult, but it hasn’t come.

” She wanted to say more, but this was Matt’s birthday weekend.

It wasn’t fair to dump her problems on him.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” Matt didn’t tear his gaze away from Meg. “We’re all back together for less than a few hours, and I’m questioning everything. Like everything. My life choices. My future. Everything.”