Page 3 of A Cowboy for Christmas
He hadn’t spotted me. But I’d seen him looking around. Had he been looking for me? I highly doubt it. I had hoped that he would’ve changed somehow, but, of course, he hadn’t. Austin had looked as handsome as he had that day in the barn. God, I hated him. Well, that’s what I was telling myself, anyway. It was the reason I’d hidden in the back of the church at Pop's funeral.
“Colt.” Mr. Smith, calling my name, pulled me out of my thoughts of Austin.
“Sorry, Mr. Smith,” I say, trying to pay more attention.
“I know this isn’t the news that you wanted to hear, but Austin has confirmed that he’s going to stay. I told him that you would meet him tomorrow at six am.”
“It’s okay, the ranch has changed since he was last here. Gran and Pops got more livestock. I give him a week, two tops.”
“Colt, you are going to have to play nice. He needs to quit on his own terms,” Mr. Smith says, and I know he’s right.
“Does Austin know that the ranch will come to me if he decides to leave?”
“No. It was one of the stipulations. Austin wasn’t to be told.”
This surprised me. Gran and Pops always told me what they planned to do with the ranch. I hadn’t liked it, but this was their ranch, not mine. This place was my home, too, though. After Austin had left, I continued to work on the ranch during school holidays. Eventually coming before and after school to help with the animals. When I graduated high school, I asked Pops if I could work here, permanently. I could see that it was getting to be too much for him on his own. Plus, I was able to look after the place when they went visiting.
When I lost my grandparents, and had been trying to figure out how I could afford their house, Gran and Pops told me to sell it and use some of the money to build a home on their land. It was also at this time that I started calling them Gran and Pops. It happened by accident one day. We had been in the kitchen for lunch, and I had thanked Gran. I will never forget the smile on her face, or the laughter from Pops, as I tried to apologize. After all, I wasn’t their grandson.
“Colt.” Mr. Smith says my name, again, and I really try to stop daydreaming. This is important shit. Looking over to him, he gives me a slight smile. “There is one more thing. They have gifted you the truck, and they left you some money.”
“Money?” I knew that Pops was planning to sign over the truck to me. In fact, he had done so at the start of the winter. I’m guessing he told Mr. Smith just to make sure everyone was aware.
“Yes. It’s not a huge amount, but it could be enough to help you get your own place,” Mr. Smith explains.
“Rustic Valley is my home,” I reply, there is no way that I could move away. If Austin ends up keeping the ranch, then I’m going to have to hope that he keeps me on.
“You’re a good man, Colt. I’m sure everything will work out.”
“Me too.”
“So, I think that’s everything for today, unless there is something else you need me to go over?” Mr. Smith adds.
“There is one more thing,” I say.
“Of course, what can I help with?”
“Well,” and I pause for a moment. “Christmas.” And I hear Mr. Smith groan. I can’t help but smile.
“You’re still planning to continue the Christmas festival?”
“Of course. Gran and Pops loved it. Why on earth would I stop it?”
“Won’t it be too much for you to organize on your own?”
“But, I’m not on my own, Austin will have to help, too,” I tell Mr. Smith. “So, can I count on your donation for the silent auction?”
“Yes, you can.”
“Don’t pretend to be unhappy about it. You love the festival just as much as me,” I say over to him.
“Fine,” Mr. Smith says, giving me a smile. “But I’m going to miss the Christmas cookies.”
“The ones Gran used to make?”
“Yeah. They were so good.”
Looking around the room, pretending to check for spies, I lean forward and watch as Mr. Smith does the same.
“Well, if you can keep a secret,” I whisper. “I’m the one that’s been making them the last few years. Gran showed me when her arthritis started to affect her fingers. So, they will be there.”
“Wow. I never even noticed,” Mr. Smith replies, and I can hear the surprised edge to his voice.
“Now, Mr. Smith, do you really think Gran would let anything but perfect cookies be given out?”
“You have a good point there, Colt. Make sure there is a box with my name on it.”
“I can do that, but it might just cost you extra.” Giving him a smile, I see him roll his eyes. “Mr. Smith, the festival is for a good cause.”
Gran and Pops had started the festival as a way to make money for one of the local animal rescue centers. They had always donated what they could, but one year they saw that the center needed more than what they could give. So, they came up with the festival. Gran and Pops just set up tables with games, there were food stands in the barn, decorated, of course with Christmas trees. There were horse rides and of course a Santa for the kids to visit. Initially they hadn’t wanted to call it a fundraiser, but thought a festival would attract more people, and it worked. Soon it became the highlight of everyone’s Christmas
“Right,” I say over to Mr. Smith. “I need to get back to the ranch. Get ready for Austin’s first day tomorrow. I will come back and pick up the donation in a couple weeks.”
Getting up from my chair, I reach across the table and shake Mr. Smith’s hand. I make my way out to my truck and start my way back home. I need to check on the cattle and make sure that the horses were all locked up in the stables. Then, I need to work out what to do with Austin tomorrow. I needed him to know, very quickly, how hard it was going to be.
On the drive back to the ranch, my mind drifts to the festival, and what I need to get ready. There’s the barn that needs to be cleared out, so that all the tables can be set up. Then there are the Christmas trees, and I also need to find a replacement Santa. Pops had been playing him for years.
Pulling off the road, I look up at the wooden arch sign that marks the entrance to the ranch, and I can’t help but smile. Rustic Valley Ranch. Each letter is painstakingly carved by hand, maybe over a century ago. Pops made sure that the wood was treated and preserved. It was the first structure built by his grandfather when he bought the ranch and named it after the town.
Pops always had so much pride telling the story of how the ranch started. How the townspeople had called his grandfather crazy for purchasing this land so far out of town. The first year had been tough. That first winter had been harsh, but the townspeople had rallied around, got his grandfather through it. That was when he decided to name it after the town.
It’s a shame that after almost a century, the ranch was no longer going to be part of the family that started it, but I promised Pops that I would keep the ranch going. I just had to hope that Austin didn’t take to ranch life after being away from it for so long, because, in a year, there is no way that he wouldn’t try to sell the place. I suppose I could offer to buy it off him, but even with the money I had been left, I wouldn’t be able to afford it, and I doubt that a bank would consider me for a loan.
Pulling the truck to a stop outside the stable, I get out, making my way inside. My little homestead is just on the other side of the stable. I like being close to the horses. Don’t get me wrong, I loved looking after the cattle and the few chickens that we had, too. But the horses were always my first love. Over the years, the number of horses on the ranch had declined, and Pops had been talking about getting some more. Something I guess I will have to talk to Austin about.
Before going into town, I had let the horses out into the fields to get some exercise. Giving me the chance to clean out the stables and put out some fresh hay and water, before calling them back in.
I try to keep my mind focused on the task, but my eyes keep wandering to the stall in the corner, just by the doors to the stable. The stall where my life changed completely. That final summer with Austin had been amazing. We had been pretty much inseparable. Then, on that final day, I had decided to tell him that I like boys. I was hoping that maybe he felt the same and we had kissed. Fuck, I still remembered that kiss. The way it had made me feel. I think I fell in love with Austin in that second, but then he left. Literally, ran away, never once looking back. In the space of five minutes, I had gone from elation to heartache.
For those first few weeks after he left, I had been sure that he was going to call me or text, but there had been nothing. I had sent the odd Hey text but still got silence in return. It had hurt. Regardless of how I felt, I thought he was my friend. I thought we had become best friends that summer, but I had been wrong.
When school had started back up, that was when I missed Austin the most. Missed seeing that friendly face. I was the kid that lost his parents and had to live with his grandparents. I was never invited to parties, coz who wanted the odd one around? Then rumors had started about me being gay. They hadn’t really been mean to me, maybe a few comments here and there, but if I was a social leper before, coming out made me a complete outcast.
What was worse was when my grandparents had found out. They were traditional and found it very hard to accept that their grandson was gay. It was when I turned to the ranch more and more. Pops and Gran had heard the rumors. At this point the whole town had, but they didn’t care. They didn’t treat me any differently. To them I was the same Colt. In a way, the ranch became my sanctuary. A place I could be me. The animals didn’t care that I liked boys. They didn’t answer back when I talked to them about school. All they knew was that I was the person that gave them food.
I never wanted to admit it, but it took me a long time to get over Austin. Fifteen years was plenty of time to get over someone, and to move on from the hurt. We had to be very different people, and yet the thought of seeing him tomorrow had the butterflies coming back. God, I hated it. Hated that he still had this effect on me.
The more I brushed the stable floor the angrier I got at myself, at Austin, at Gran and Pops for doing this to me. This ranch deserved to belong to me. I was the one that stayed. I was the one that had spent years tending to the animals, mending fences, making sure the ranch still made money. There was no way that I was going to let Austin take that away from me, just like he did all those years ago when he took my first kiss.
Austin was going to find out, very quickly, how much the ranch had changed. How much hard work was needed to keep a place this size going. Also, winter was coming, there had been a noticeable chill in the air for days. This was going to make our tasks harder. If the water buckets froze, then the animals didn’t drink. Breaking frozen water wasn’t an easy task. But, the animals' needs always had to come first, and suddenly tomorrow couldn’t come fast enough.