Page 27 of A Cleverly (Un)contrived Compromise (Love’s Little Helpers #3)

CHAPTER 27

R ichard removed the kitten from inside his coat before its sharp claws ruined his shirt. Plopping the intrepid feline on his shoulder and receiving a nuzzle of thanks for it, Richard guided his horse to fall in beside Darcy. Georgiana and the lady kitten rode ahead with Mrs. Annesley, providing the perfect opportunity for frank conversation. He hated to interrupt his cousin’s reverie, but questions must be asked. “What do you think Wickham was up to?”

“Hm? Wickham?”

Richard rolled his eyes. “You remember the man? Reprobate. Lecher. Parasite. Thorn in your side.”

“Of course, I do,” Darcy snapped.

Ah, there was his taciturn relative. “I like you better when you are with Miss Elizabeth.”

“I like you better when you are silent.”

Richard ignored the hint. “You have not told her about Wickham and—” He nodded toward Georgiana.

“No.”

That was it? Richard was not satisfied with the clipped reply. Judging by Darcy’s silence, his cousin knew he ought to have confided in her too. “You marry in ten days. Do you not trust her?”

“I trust Elizabeth.”

“Then why have you not told her?”

“I have told her most of his history with me. She knows there is more I shall tell her when the time is right.”

“Darcy, the time is right. It could not be more right.”

“An observation easily made from one not deprived of a normal courtship. What most gentlemen need months or years to accomplish, I have been forced to do in three weeks and with an excessive number of chaperones.”

While Richard commiserated with Darcy—it had been Georgiana’s idea to call at Longbourn to find her brother—he held strong objections to Darcy’s other point. “Years? How would that progress? You stare at her at dinner parties for a month before you work up the gumption to ask her to dance? Then you applaud yourself over the next few months for your attentions while the lady remains oblivious to them?”

“She would know if I was courting her.”

Richard jerked his head so quickly, his collar protested with a high-pitched Mew! “I doubt that. Courting is too akin to small talk, and you were never any good at it. No, Darcy, you were wise to skip the courtship entirely and just marry the lady. Three weeks is ample time if one is quick about it.”

“The power of doing anything with quickness is always prized much by the possessor and often without any attention to the imperfection of the performance.”

“Good advice to remember on your wedding night.”

Darcy turned a brilliant shade of red. “Will you shut up if I agree that you are right and have every intention of telling her?”

It pleased Richard immensely to see how thoughts of Darcy’s bride-to-be discomposed the groom, even more satisfying than getting his cousin to admit he was right. “Good. There is no reason for Wickham to sniff around Longbourn unless he means to benefit from your marriage into that family. He could ruin the youngest easily enough and then demand regular payments for his silence.”

“A possibility I had also considered.”

“Excellent! Then I shall say no more on the subject.”

How satisfying it had been to see Wickham dumbfounded. The look on his face when he had seen Darcy hold Miss Elizabeth’s hand, his heart in his eyes, the likeness of a lovelorn buck…

For months, Richard had dreamed of exacting justice from Wickham, of calling in his debts, or sending him to debtor’s prison, of disfiguring his pretty nose… but this was infinitely better! Who knew that the ultimate dagger to Wickham’s heart was for him to see Darcy sublimely happy? Ah, it did a man good to see justice served on a silver platter filled with Wickham’s own envy.

Richard could have basked in his cousin’s triumph the rest of the way, but he had granted Darcy enough contented silence. There was another question burning in his mind. “What about Bingley?”

Darcy made a noise between a growl and a sigh.

“I take that to mean you have said nothing to her about your little scheme? What do you talk about?”

Darcy spoke through clenched teeth. “It was not an issue until you showed up.”

“Is that what you think? I had hoped you would abandon the foolish plan entirely.”

“And watch Bingley make a muddle of his life?”

It pained Richard to think of Bingley with Miss Bennet, but he would not hear her maligned. “Miss Bennet would be the making of him.” She was the kind of woman to make any man better himself.

“My misgiving has nothing to do with her.”

“Then what?”

“What would Bingley do for her ? Thrust her into the company of his pernicious sisters, who would never forgive him for marrying below their outrageous expectations? He has learned a great deal over the past months, but he has no permanent home to offer and still relies too heavily on the opinions of others.”

“Except when it comes to choosing a wife. He seems firmly settled on Miss Bennet despite his sisters’ advice and your influence to the contrary. Had I not bribed his bailiff to create a crisis requiring his immediate attention, Bingley would have accompanied me and Georgiana to Longbourn today.”

Darcy frowned. “I had not thought his bailiff the type of man to accept bribes.”

Richard grumbled. “I am out five pounds.”

“Methods aside, I am grateful to you for detaining him. I cannot stand by and watch Bingley ruin his life and Miss Bennet’s or hurt Georgiana. I swore I would protect her, and I shall live up to my promise.”

Sucking in a lungful of air, Richard released his breath slowly. Darcy genuinely believed he was shielding the ones he loved, but instead he denied them a choice in the matter. Even worse, he could lose Elizabeth over this. “An admirable goal, but who are you to make these decisions for everyone?”

Silence.

Richard tried another angle. “You cannot always protect Georgie.”

“I have to try.”

“Then you will do so at too great a cost.”

“She trusts me like a father. To withdraw my protection would be a betrayal.”

“But you can betray your betrothed? All Elizabeth will see, all that matters, is that you chose your sister over hers. You are choosing for everyone, and the choice is not yours to make.”

“You would have me stand by and do nothing?”

“Have you discussed your concerns with Bingley? He trusts you; he would listen.”

“But what if he does not?”

“Then he will make bad choices. That is what people do. They make poor decisions and suffer the consequences, but they learn from their mistakes and do better next time.”

Darcy’s shoulders tensed to his ears. “This is Georgiana’s next time. She chose Bingley.”

“And he chooses Miss Bennet,” Richard said with a deep sigh. There was no point in arguing with Darcy when he believed himself to be right. If only he would be as stubborn for his own happiness as he was for his sister’s and his friends’.

They reached the stables. After helping the ladies down, Richard plucked the kitten off the brim of his hat and carried him into the parlor, where the rest of the household was gathered.

“How are the Bennets today?” Miss Bingley asked with a sly smile. “I do not know why you must call so often at Longbourn when your charming mother-in-law will make sure she and her lively daughters are frequent guests at Pemberley.” She giggled behind her hand, the bird of paradise feathers in her bandeau quivering. There was a meanness in her laugh that Richard could not ignore.

He turned to Darcy. “Mrs. Bennet is not in the habit of assaulting rose bushes, I hope?”

“She holds a certain hostility toward hedgerows, but I have never heard her speak against any other flora.” Darcy maintained a neutral expression, a true testament to his deeply ingrained manners.

Georgiana buried her face behind the cinnamon-spotted kitten.

Miss Bingley turned her nose up and huffed.

Her brother pouted by the window. “I wish I could have gone with you instead of being stuck here. It is impossible to get anything done in this weather.”

Wickham aside, the company was far superior at Longbourn than here, but Richard had teased Miss Bingley enough. He could not in good form insult his hostess by agreeing with her brother.

Tickling his furry friend under the chin, Richard set the kitten down on the floor. “Go explore, Little Crusoe,” Richard said under his breath.

Too curious to waste time lamenting the loss of its elevated seat, the little explorer set his sights on the large Palladian windows Miss Bingley had decorated in garish extravagance. Blue and lilac taffeta curtains trimmed liberally with gold-colored trimmings, tassels, and fringes—the perfect playground for a climber to test his claws and reach glorious new heights.

Serafina sauntered into the room, followed by the rest of her litter. Georgiana scooped her up in her arms. “May they stay for a few minutes, Miss Bingley?”

“Of course, my dear! I have always said there is no finer pet than a cat, have I not, Louisa?”

Mrs. Hurst dutifully agreed.

“How much sooner one tires of a dog than a feline,” Miss Bingley continued. “When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I do not have the companionship of a cat like Serafina and her adorable kittens.”

Georgiana’s face lit up with pleasure. “It would please me more than anything to gift you one of them. You may have your pick of the litter.”

Except for Angelina , Richard thought, hoping Georgiana remembered that she was already promised to Miss Lydia.

“You are too generous! I could not possibly presume to accept when I know how precious they are to you.”

“Oh, but you are one of my dearest friends!” Georgiana insisted.

Richard grimaced. He had feared this outcome.

Puffing up like a peacock at the compliment, Miss Bingley fluttered her fingers over her heart. “I am flattered, but pray address me as Caro as all my intimate friends do.”

Of course, Georgiana insisted that Miss Bingley use her Christian name.

All the avowed friendship in the room threatened to sour Richard’s mood.

A flicker of movement behind Miss Bingley caught his eye. The next moment, before he or anyone else could intervene, two paws batted at her bandeau in a fight worthy of the boxer’s ring. The prize: two long, colorful feathers. The contender: one white kitten with a hat-shaped splotch on his head.

Miss Bingley waved her hands and screeched. Had she held still, she might have fared better.

Bingley pulled the Mighty Hunter off his sister’s head, the kitten taking one feather with him and leaving the other dangling broken from Miss Bingley’s mangled headpiece.

Wrapping his arms around the cat, Bingley hid behind the creature, disguising his laughter behind poorly disguised coughs and an occasional half-hearted reprimand. “That was awfully rude of you. Your mother looks distressed.”

Serafina did not, in fact, look distressed. Richard could not claim the ability to read an animal’s mind, but he would bet that she was rather proud of her son’s improving hunting skills.

A cry from the decorated window pulled Richard away from the diverting scene and spotted Crusoe stuck on top of a gilt-carved rosette. The little bugger had climbed higher than Richard could reach.

Darcy, quick to react, pulled a chair closer to the window sash, but it was Richard who climbed atop it to rescue his pal. Stretching to the tips of his toes, he coaxed the kitten onto his arm. With all the practice it had balancing on Richard’s shoulders of late, this was no trouble for the daring puss.

Heart calming to a normal rhythm, Richard stepped onto the floor, the precious cargo safe in his arms.

“Grandmama’s vase!” cried Mrs. Hurst.

Darcy leaped back across the room in four long strides, just in time to catch the vase the feline butler had pushed off the ledge. Lifting the black kitten by its scruff, Darcy removed the perpetrator from the table before it could attempt to break any more heirlooms.

“That was close,” Bingley observed.

A collective sigh of relief pervaded the room. Who knew how disruptive the tiny creatures could be?

Richard stroked Crusoe’s fur, watching as Bingley attempted to soothe his sisters as well as the kitten who was fascinated with feathers. Darcy, too, cradled the cantankerous black and white cat against his coat, letting the kitten settle on his lap when he took a seat.

What a laughable picture they made! Three gentlemen indulging the whims of three pocket-sized troublemakers.